Credit for lore advisory goes to Umodin. Credit for beta-reading goes to Joe Lawyer.
The excitable shout made the ruler of Theramore close her eyes in a confusing mixture of exasperation, fondness and apprehension.
"Luna, what…" She started to say, but took a defensive posture when it became clear that the bigger blonde had no intention of slowing down.
Most people would have read the body language and restrained themselves, but not Luna. No, she just barreled forward and scooped her up in a hug. Right in front of her chamberlain and Theramore's guild leaders, with whom she had been in a meeting with.
"I missed you!" Luna said obliviously, holding her off the ground in a hug that was entirely too intimate for people of their brief acquaintance.
"We just saw each other a few weeks ago!" Jaine protested, trying to squirm out of the embrace. She also directed a dirty look at their audience, which was either amused or confused, but definitely not helping.
"I know, that's way too long." Luna said agreeably and finally let her down, smiling brightly.
Jaina could feel her indignation crumbling in the face of the sunny expression and cursed her own mild disposition. "What are you doing here, Luna? Weren't you and Harry fighting the qiraji down in Silithus?"
Before Luna could reply, a huffing pair of guardsmen finally caught up to her, clearly having been running hard. "Apologies, my lady, we tried to stop her, but…"
"It's alright." Jaina interrupted, making a mental note to tell her guards to not bother stopping Luna in the future. She wouldn't listen anyway and it just wasn't worth the effort. "Return to your posts."
They saluted and left, clearly relieved to not be in trouble.
"They seemed nice." Luna commented.
"Quite." Jaina said drily and turned to the others in the room with a sigh. "I'm sorry, but do you mind if we postpone this meeting? I have to take care of this."
Not because she wanted to, but because Luna wouldn't leave. At least the meeting hadn't been too important.
The guild leaders grumbled a bit, but left without much complaint. Her chamberlain, however, made no move to leave. By the clear look of amusement on the woman's face, she had no intention of missing this.
In most cases, that kind of dismissal of orders would be unthinkable, but this particular chamberlain happened to be Aegwynn, second last Guardian of Tirisfal and the mother of Medivh, a thousand years old and one of the most powerful sorceresses to have ever lived.
Even if she was no longer the great power she used to be, she was still fully capable of ignoring social protocol when it suited her.
"So, this is the priestess of Elune you told me about?" Aegwynn prompted curiously, giving Luna a once over.
"Hello!" Luna greeted brightly, peering back with unabashed curiosity of her own. "I'm Luna."
"And I am Aegwynn." The ancient sorceress smiled, using her true name instead of the false one she gave others.
Jaina had a feeling that the two young-looking very old women were seeing more in each other than she could fathom. What kind of understanding might pass between two people with such a vast wealth of experience?
"Do you have any tips for seducing Jaina?" Luna asked. "Harry and I have been trying to get her to agree to join our marriage, but she's being stubborn."
"Hmm, I would say that you should just keep at it." Aegwynn nodded, holding her chin in hand thoughtfully. "She's incredibly pigheaded, but you'll wear her down eventually."
Jaina regretted her high expectations. "Aegwynn!"
"What?" The former Guardian asked innocently. "You pestered me out of my solitary life, so it is only fair that someone else does the same to you."
"It's not the same thing!" She protested.
"We've brought in two night elves since the last time we saw each other, Jessir and Arko." Luna said this as if it was supposed to be a draw. "They're great and you'll love them."
"For the last time, I am not interested in other women." Jaina wasn't even going to bother thinking about how exactly they had managed to seduce two night elves when she knew that kaldorei society was heavily monogamous. "And I wouldn't jump into a marriage this fast even if it was a normal one, much less whatever it is you and Harry have going on."
"Okay." Luna nodded in acceptance, but Jaina felt only dread. She somehow doubted it would be that easy.
"You never answered my question, why are you here instead of in Silithus?" She decided to change the subject.
"Because it's time for the victory party." Luna explained.
"Already?" Jaina blinked. "I thought it would take you at least twice as long."
"Harry hates it when his wars to drag on." Luna hummed, as if that answered everything. "Anyway, I came to invite you to celebrate with us and conscript your help in buying drinks."
"Why would you need my help to buy drinks?" Jaina frowned.
"Because I don't have the teleport destinations to all the Alliance and Horde cities yet. I can handle Stormwind and Darnassus, but I was hoping you could do Ironforge, Orgrimmar and Thunder Bluff. We can probably skip the Undercity, though."
"Luna, even if Thrall and I are friends, I can't just teleport into the middle of Orgrimmar." Jaina rubbed her forehead in exasperation. Doing that would cause a riot and severely undermine Thrall's political standing.
"Oh." Luna pouted. "How about Ironforge? The dwarves would probably enjoy a taste of home."
No doubt, Dwarves were notoriously fond of their drink.
"Alright, I can do that." Jaina agreed, because it really wasn't that much of an issue and she was always one to encourage friendly interaction between the Horde and Alliance. She'd send over some of Theramore's stock, too. "What kind of drinks and how much should I buy?"
"All of them and as many as you can carry." Came the unreasonable demand.
"Luna…" Jaina groaned.
"And then you have to come celebrate with us." Luna plowed onwards.
"I can't do that. Joining a celebration of victory when I wasn't even part of the fighting would be insulting." She reasoned, but was more concerned about being around that much alcohol when she knew that she had two persistent suitors trying to get her into their bed. The chances of waking up naked in between them was far too high.
"But you're family." Luna replied with honest confusion.
"No I'm not." Jaine refuted.
"You will be." Luna refuted back. "Which means that you already are."
"That is not how it works!"
"Would it be so bad?" Aegwynn chimed in musingly, but the evil glint in her eyes betrayed her. "After all, you aren't getting any younger. This Harry sounds like he has prospects and you said he was handsome."
"Aegwynn!" Jaina was mortified. That had been admitted in confidence! And there were plenty of handsome men that she wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole besides.
"With how busy you are, having other women to distract him could work in your favor." Aegwynn went on blithely. "Plus, you would never have to worry about who would babysit your children when you had to go somewhere."
"Please stop." Jaina moaned in embarrassment.
But the ancient sorceress had no mercy. "And being with another woman really isn't so bad, even if you prefer men. I had a 'special' friend in Silvermoon for a while that could do this thing with her tongue…"
"Enough!" Jaina exclaimed, letting loose a burst of magic powered by sheer embarrassment.
"Aww, but I wanted to hear what Aegwynn's friend could do with her tongue." Luna pouted.
Jaina decided to ignore that. "I'll help you with the drinks, but I am not joining the celebration, end of discussion!"
Luna stared at her with a vaguely terrifying expression. "Resistance is futile."
Harry stood at the entrance to the Temple of Ahn'Qiraj with a thoughtful frown. Around him, the disbanding Might of Kalimdor worked to pack up their stuff and leave for their respective homelands, but he paid them no mind. He was busy thinking.
Eventually, Saurfang found a free moment to approach him.
"The green dragon said that destroying C'thun's avatar wouldn't be enough to kill it." The old orc said as an opener.
"It wasn't." Harry confirmed. "Its true body is buried deep underground and probably bigger than all of Silithus. We basically just popped a zit."
"I was afraid you would say that." Saurfang grunted.
"Still, it's not all bad. Dying while fully possessing an avatar will fuck up even the most powerful of beings, Merithra was completely right about that. C'thun should remain comatose for a long, long time. Hopefully long enough for us to find a way to get to its true body and destroy it… provided that nobody helps it wake up."
"We will have to keep this place garrisoned, then." Saurfang contemplated. "I wish I could be certain that would be enough."
"I'll wall off C'thun's chamber, put concealing spells on it and place an alarm ward on it just in case." Harry nodded, also not trusting that soldiers would be enough. "I was thinking of flooding the place, but that has too much potential to backfire."
"How would you even do that?" Saurfang asked, bewildered.
They went quiet for a few seconds before Harry spoke up again.
"There is one other thing I might be able to do."
"You are uncertain?" Saurfang prompted.
"There is a spell from back home that allows one to take a specific bit of knowledge out of the world and hide it within the soul of someone they trust, called a Secret Keeper. That knowledge then becomes unknowable through any means, save by being told of it by the Secret Keeper. If I hid the location of C'thun's chamber in this manner, then it wouldn't matter how hard anyone searched, they would be incapable of finding it unless the Secret Keeper told them about it."
"That sounds like exactly what we need." Saurfang stated intensely. "What are the costs and restrictions of such a spell?"
"For restrictions, the caster cannot be the Secret Keeper, the Secret Keeper can hold only one Secret, the Secret Keeper must not stay in close proximity to the Secret and most importantly, the Secret Keeper must be implicitly trusted by the one giving the Secret away." Harry listed. "As the leader of the army that conquered this place, the knowledge technically belongs to you."
Not quite true – the knowledge belonged to everyone who knew it – but Saurfang was the key focal point of the Might of Kalimdor, so any decision he made would be much more easily accepted than something a mere grunt did.
"Then I would entrust it to my Warchief." Saurfang said instantly.
"I can agree with that." Harry nodded, having no problem with Thrall being the Secret Keeper. "The bigger issue is that the cost of the spell goes up or down depending on how widespread the knowledge is. Hiding the location of Stormwind or Orgrimmar would, for example, be beyond me. Hiding something that all of the Might of Kalimdor, as well as the upper echelons of each race's government knows would be… chancy. And that isn't even taking into consideration the other Old Gods, dragons, titans and whatever other creatures who also have this information."
"So can you do it or not?" The orc asked.
"I'd have to do some tests." He concluded. There were too many variables to be sure of anything.
"Very well, but try to hurry it up, will you?" Saurfang prodded. "I would sleep easier knowing that nobody could come here and undo our work."
"Yeah, yeah, don't rush me." Harry waved off, knowing that the lackadaisical attitude would annoy the perpetually grim warrior.
Predictably, Saurfang scowled at him irritably.
"Are you boys having fun?" A cheerful voice intruded.
"Oh yes, the best time." Harry replied drily, catching Luna as she ran up to hug him. "Are you done?"
"Yep." She nodded enthusiastically. "All the food and drink has been bought and we are ready to party. Jaina refused to come, though."
Luna had, somewhat to his chagrin, invited all the elites of the Might of Kalimdor to celebrate their victory back at the tower. It would have been the entire army if they had the capacity for it.
Harry could see the sense in it. A victory party would solidify the diplomatic benefits of working together and the tower had already been used to host people due to temporal shenanigans, but he was still not particularly happy about it.
"Too bad." He sighed, having been hoping for another chance to seduce her. Oh well, at least Merithra would be there.
"Don't let the Kor'kron drink too much." Saurfang warned. "I intend to have them moving back home tomorrow."
"You could come, too." Luna suggested hopefully.
"I have no interest in celebrations." The old orc replied flatly.
"Then how about a hug?" She pressed, stepping away from Harry and opening up her arms invitingly.
"No, thank you." Saurfang now sounded extremely awkward.
"It'll make you feel better." Luna did not desist, taking a step forward with her arms still wide open.
"I feel fine." Saurfang fended off, taking a step backwards.
"Friends hug each other." Luna tried another angle of attack.
"Orcs do not hug."
"But we are friends?"
"I, uh…" Saurfang was not a 'friends' kind of guy, but he could not say 'no' to this question for multiple reasons. "…yes."
"Yay!" Luna cheered and lunged forward. "Friendship hug!"
The veteran warrior tried to dodge, but Luna cheated. She had a spell designed for the specific purpose of making sure that nobody could escape her hugs. It was super effective.
Saurfang froze in sheer indecisiveness as his head was pressed into the human's breasts, unsure of what was a safe way to extricate himself.
"I know you didn't get what you wanted, but it'll be alright." She said softly, weaving a blanket of comfort around the core of deep emotional pain in his soul. "You will find your peace."
Saurfang relaxed a little almost against his will. He still felt incredibly uncomfortable being hugged, but there was something soothing about Luna's presence.
Harry just watched all this happen with undisguised amusement and decided to poke some fun at the orc. "Remember our rules on adoption, dear. He's too old."
That got Saurfang to try shaking her off again and she let him go with a smile.
"See? Hugs are great!" Luna beamed.
"Yes…." Saurfgan said awkwardly and decided to glare at Harry instead. "Come speak to me when you figure out if that spell of yours will work."
"Uh huh." Harry did not stop smirking.
"He's like a big grumpy teddy bear." Luna decided as they watched the old orc stomp off.
Harry somewhat doubted that, but he wasn't going to try contradicting her on it. The amusement value was too high. "Alright, let's go collect Arko and Jessir and get the party started."
It didn't take long to get things organized. Due to the fact that the only thing people really did inside the Time Chamber was sleep, most of the infrastructure for the party was already in place.
That didn't mean there were no problems at all, however. With the threat vanquished, the common cause was also gone and past grudges came to the fore.
The night elves took over the area closest to the moonwell and remained rather standoffish. They were polite enough to the humans, dwarves and tauren, but radiated a distinctly unwelcome aura towards the orcs.
That might have something to do with the fact that they were in Ashenvale and hanging around near a shrine dedicated to the mother of Cenarius…
Recognizing this, Luna directed the orcs to sit on the other side of their 'backyard' so as to minimize any incidents. Everyone saw what she was doing, but nobody made any mention of it. Aside from being their host, Luna was also someone that everyone respected, whether it was for keeping them alive, bringing them back to life or simply because they saw what happened when she got angry.
Harry knew that people had mistaken his Light Bomb to be Luna's doing, due to the timing of the event. He could have explained… but it was funnier not to.
Sat in between the night elves and orcs were the humans, dwarves and tauren. The underlying tension from past hostilities was not an ideal situation, but fortunately it had a solution.
"Alright, this is the booze section." Harry declared, gesturing to the multiple barrels, kegs, bottles and other types of containers. "The selection is mostly human, dwarven and night elven due to incomplete logistics, but there are a few barrels of orcish stuff over there and that in the corner is from my personal stores. Have as much as you want. Non-alcoholic drinks are on the other side."
The age old maxim about alcohol being a social lubricant applied just as well as ever and there was much cheering at his declaration. There was practically a stampede to get to the stuff, racial tensions put aside for the moment.
"Is it wrong that a part of me wants to tell them where you got it from just to ruin their happiness?" Arko Asked with a complicated expression, nodding at the orcs who had immediately made for their own drinks.
He had looted it from the Warsong Lumber Camp.
"Anger and vindictiveness is a perfectly healthy reaction to being wronged." Harry assured, most certainly not being a proponent of 'forgive and forget'. "They trespassed into your lands and made a mess of things, anything they get in return they deserve."
"Should a paladin really be vengeful, though?"
"You are a creature of violence. If you weren't you would have been better served becoming a priestess." He pointed out. "Be as vengeful as you please, although we will need to work on harnessing your emotions properly."
"I suppose… it's just that Trey always talked about how the Holy Light is meant to bring people together…" Arko didn't even try to deny that she was a violent woman. You couldn't be a warrior without having a penchant for violence.
And there it was, her biggest obstacle. That bit of survivor's guilt in regards to Trey Lightforge was keeping her from committing to the path that she knew she was most suited for. All the fighting in Ahn'Qiraj had helped her sort things out a great deal, but there was a limit to how much even the most physical of people could sort themselves out without introspection.
"The destruction of evil is part of that." Harry tried to twist the narrative. "You've got a decent handle on how to call upon Elune's power now. Trust that she will deny it to you if you ever try to do something that she would disapprove of."
He had no idea whatsoever if that really the case, but it seemed plausible. Similarities to the Holy Light aside, Elune was a true goddess and had a much tighter rein on her power.
Arko didn't reply and just looked pensive. That was good, it meant she was thinking.
"Make way, food train coming through." Luna's cheerful voice cut through all conversation as she appeared from around the tower, an actual train of food floating in the air behind her.
It was an eclectic collection, as was to be expected given that the ingredients had been bought from both Kalimdor and the Eastern Kingdoms. The meat alone ranged from the common types such as beef, lamb and boar, but also veered into the unusual, such as crocolisk and even some dinosaur from Un'Goro Crater.
Luna had cleaned out several butcher shops to get this much in a hurry and hadn't been too discriminating on the type. Cooking some of the more exotic stuff proved to be an interesting challenge and both Arko and Jessir demonstrated a respectable mastery of the culinary arts. Despite the slow pace of night elven life, nearly two thousand years was apparently enough time to learn how to cook. Their contribution was part of the reason for why the food was so varied.
Following behind the meat were dozens of bowls of sides and sauces, and bringing up the rear was a collection of vegetarian dishes for the tauren and anyone else that didn't like meat for whatever reason.
People scrambled to get out of the way as she laid it all out on the central table, staring with some shock at the spectacle.
"A magnificent feast, Lady Luna." Von Zeldig praised enthusiastically. "My compliments to the chef."
"Thank you." Luna replied cheerfully, not quite admitting that she, Harry, Arko and Jessir had been the ones to do the cooking. "Alright everyone, dig in!" She said as the last dish was set down.
There was a near stampede towards the food table, but there was a notable bubble of calm around Luna as she levitated a collection of plates and bowls away. That bubble moved with her as she made her way to Harry and Arko and then the three of them sat down at the table where Caelestrasz and Merithra were waiting.
Arygos had unfortunately wanted nothing to do with a party hosted by mortals and made that eminently clear.
"Where is Jessir, is she not part of your group?" Merithra asked, wondering if she had gotten the wrong idea.
"She is." Luna nodded.
"She's just busy groveling for forgiveness." Harry added with a smirk, making Arko snicker.
"I'm sorry, alright?" Jessir pleaded. "But I really couldn't take you with us."
Della huffed and turned her back on her partner, sticking her snout in the air.
"A war is no place for a wolf." Jessir continued trying to reason with her. "Even if I took you along, the army commanders wouldn't have been able to integrate you into their battle plan."
Della growled discontently in response.
"What do you mean 'what does that matter'?! I couldn't just show up and tell me 'hey, this is my wolf and she's going to fight alongside me'. You know that isn't how two-leg armies work."
Della huffed and turned her head around to stare at the huntress.
"Della, we've been over this already." Jessir groaned. "I couldn't just stay with you while there was a battle for Azeroth's very survival going on."
"Don't make this about Harry and Luna. Arko and I did not volunteer to fight in that war because of them, they just… made it possible."
The wolf whined and scooted closer.
"You don't mean that." Jessir chided gently. "If they hadn't showed up Arko would be dead or worse and so would we most likely."
Della whined some more and stuck her head into Jessir's arms.
"I know, I know." The huntress soothed. "But I'll remind you that you felt this way about Arko too at first, so just give it some time."
Della huffed sulkily.
"How about we go on a hunt together, just the two of us? Or the two of us and Arko if you want?"
The wolf growled suspiciously.
"No, I am not trying to buy you off with scraps. Look, if you don't want to spend time with me, then just say so." Jessir affected a sulky tone of her own.
Della chuffed and gave her a warning nibble.
"She has a wolf companion that she had to leave behind for the war." Arko explained for the benefit of the two confused dragons. "The problem is that this is the second 'adventure' that Jessir had to leave Della behind for and it's put a strain on their relationship."
"Ah, I see. The loyalty of an animal companion is not to be underestimated." Merithra nodded, but most of her focus seemed to be on the food she was piling onto her plate.
"Mmm." Harry hummed in agreement and leaned a bottle towards her glass. "Want some?"
"Is that kaldorei ginger wine?" The green dragon asked with clear interest.
"I figured we could start off with something light before moving on to the more fortified dwarven stuff." He smirked and started pouring, taking her question as a yes.
Merithra brought it to her lips immediately and visibly had to restrain herself from quaffing the entire glass in one go, setting it back down with a happy sigh. "I haven't had one of these delightful mortal drinks in ages."
"Let's get hammered and wake up naked in bed together!" Luna suggested enthusiastically.
"Luna!" Arko choked on her own drink in surprise.
But rather than taking offense, Merithra just chuckled. "Dragons do not get drunk."
"A pity." Harry wasn't really surprised. Every species of dragon he'd encountered so far treated booze the way humans treated mineral water. "But we can still wake up naked in bed together."
"You certainly are persistent." Merithra noted. Huh, looks like once the initial surprise of being hit on wore off, she was a lot more composed. Dang tens of thousands of years of life experience ruining his fun. "Why, though? It is not as if you could fertilize my eggs."
That was some cold-blooded logic. "I think you might be underestimating my power and resourcefulness, but even if you're right I still find you incredibly attractive."
"And the Moonlight Dragonflight could do with a dragon mom!" Luna chimed in.
That clearly surprised both dragons, because they froze in place and stared.
"Moonlight Dragonflight?" Caelestrasz asked cautiously.
"Mhm, I took Onyxia's eggs after we killed her and Big Sis Elune helped purge the Old God corruption from them, as well as tie them to herself instead of the earth, so now they're the Moonlight Dragonflight." Luna explained happily.
"I… see." Merithra said faintly. "Could I see these eggs?"
"Of course! I left them with Tyrande while we were fighting, but I'll go fetch them after the party."
"Mother will definitely be interested in hearing about this." Caelestrasz murmured. "She may even ask to take custody of them."
"But the Green Dragonflight is closer to Elune." Luna pouted. "I want Merithra to be their dragon mom."
"I am willing to check on them when my duties permit, but I am not interested in mating with you." The green dragon said.
"Not even a little?" Luna pouted even harder.
"Not even a little." Merithra chuckled.
"Thank Elune." Arko muttered with clear relief.
"What, is she not pretty enough for you?" Harry teased. "Do you have something against dragons?"
"That's not it and you know it!" She burst out indignantly, giving his shoulder a shove.
"What did Harry do this time?" Jessir asked, having just come into conversation range in time to hear that last bit.
"Merithra just completely shut down our advances and Arko was praising Elune for it." He explained.
"I told you that trying to seduce a dragon was a dumb idea." Jessir snorted, plopping herself down on the bench.
"It was not a dumb idea." Harry retorted sternly. "Just look at how sexy she is!"
"And those horns are the cutest!" Luna contributed.
"I do not understand this fascination you have with my horns." Merithra shook her head, obviously electing to ignore the comments about her sexiness.
"I don't think even Luna understands her fascination with your horns." Arko muttered, having once asked what that was about and only received a confusing non-answer for her trouble.
"I just think they're cute." Luna asserted. "Will you still let me polish them even if you don't want to join our battle harem?"
Jessir had just been taking a drink at the point and thus ended up doing a spit take. "Battle harem?!"
"What else do you think we should call it?" Hary challenged with a raised eyebrow. "We're a harem and we go into battle."
"We are not calling ourselves that." Arko declared flatly.
"Why not?" Luna asked, tilting her head sideways.
"Because it's ridiculous! How is anyone supposed to respect us with a name like that?"
"You're so cute, worrying about what people will think." Harry chuckled, pinching her cheek.
"You'll grow out of it." Luna said reassuringly, reaching over to rub her arm.
"You two are impossible!" Arko cried in frustration, smacking away their hands.
"It is good to see the mortal races getting along like this." Caelestrasz commented, not looking at just them but at the party around them.
"Don't get your hopes up too high now." Harry snorted.
As if on cue, a dull roar erupted from a nearby table, the sound of many throats cheering. They all turned to look and saw what looked like a drinking contest between a group of humans, dwarves and orcs getting started.
"Ten gold says that turns into a brawl." Harry bet.
"An orc will throw the first punch." Arko took him up on it.
"My money is on a dwarf, they seem to take their drinking pretty seriously." Jessir weighed in.
"I'll take the humans, then." Harry nodded and turned to look at the other three people at the table. "What about you?"
"It seems rude to bet on which of your guests will start a fight." Merithra said with a small frown.
"I bet that there won't be a fight at all." Luna decided cheerfully.
"I don't know enough about mortals to guess what will happen." Caelestrasz admitted.
As it turned out, they all lost the best.
An orc and a night elf had bumped into each other on the way to the drinks. The orc, being somewhat inebriated, snarked that the night elf should watch where she was going. The night elf, being not entirely sober herself, responded by breaking his nose.
"I must have internalized the idea that elves are too high on their own self-importance to throw a punch without even realizing it." Harry pondered as the orcs rallied to their fallen brother, prompting the night elves to do the same, which inevitably pulled in the humans and the dwarves as well. The tauren were stuck trying to play peacemaker.
"Why would you think that about us?" Arko asked quizzically, keeping a wary eye on the developing shouting contest.
"Not night elves in particular." Harry corrected. "Fictional literature back home often portrayed elves as aloof beings that considers every other race to be uncivilized barbarians."
"In the days of the Highborne, that would have been accurate." Merithra pointed out, then developed a concerned frown. "Should you not be stopping this? They look like they are about to come to blows."
"Nah, drunken brawls are great bonding experiences." He waved off.
"BREAK THEIR FACES!" Jessir laughed, almost swaying out of her seat.
"Why did you keep slipping her drinks?" Arko hissed with a glare.
"I wanted to see what a drunk night elf looked like." Harry admitted honestly. "Jessir seems to be an energetic type of drunk."
Arko blew air from her nose like an aggravated bull and pulled on her old friend's waist when she tried to get up and wander in the direction of the conflict.
"Arko, lemme go." Jessir whined, squirming in the moonlight paladin's lap.
"No you're staying right here where I can keep an eye on you."
"Hehe, that's pretty bold. I didn't think you would be willing to try anything in public." The huntress giggled.
"Hmm, flirty as well." Harry noted over Arko's embarrassed sputter. "She must be a lot more playful than she lets on."
"Harry, this is not the time to be conducting one of your weird experiments!" Arko hissed, valiantly trying to keep down a blush.
It was at this point that someone's mad gesticulations hit a full mug of ale. The mug's contents were sent arcing through the air, splattering all over a dwarf's face, and more importantly, his beard.
A moment of silence ensued, followed by an outraged roar as the vertically challenged race moved to avenge the insult to their glorious facial hair.
"And there they go." Harry chuckled.
"Yeah! Smash his head against the table!" Jessir cheered, bouncing on Arko's lap in her excitement.
"This looks like it needs some supervision." Luna assessed and turned to Harry. "Maybe you should take Jessir to bed while Arko and I stay to make sure things don't get out of hand. We'll join you later."
"You sure?" Harry raised an eyebrow. "I could stay instead."
"No, you would just let them do anything, even kill each other, and call it educational." Luna retorted with innocent savagery. "Besides, you went through all that trouble to get Jessir drunk, so it's only fair you get to take advantage of it."
"There is definitely something wrong with that logic." Arko commented in consternation, tightening her grip to keep the swaying Jessir in place.
"Fair enough." Harry conceded with a small grin and turned to Merithra. "Last chance to change your mind."
The green dragon gave him an exasperated smile. "No, thank you. In fact, Caelestrasz and I have dallied long enough already. We need to rejoin our flights."
"True, Mother will be upset if she learns of my survival from someone else." The red dragon nodded, standing up.
"Goodbye hugs!" Luna declared also getting up and ambushing the two dragons before they could properly object. "Don't forget to come back to check on the dragon eggs. And Merithra, I still want to polish your horns."
"Fine, I will let you polish my horns." Merithra looked like she was on the verge of rolling her eyes.
"Yay!" Luna cheered and let go.
"It may not be I that Mother sends, but she will surely be interested in this Moonlight Dragonflight." Caelestrasz assured, privately glad that he had not given horns to his mortal form.
The two dragons gave one last nod to the group of four before teleporting away, because each individual dragonflight apparently had some kind of unique teleport skill available to them. Merithra's body briefly gained a dreamlike quality before vanishing and Caelestrasz popped away in a small burst of fire that, instead of burning the grass at his feet, made flowers bloom.
"Ah, to lose out on adding a sexy dragon lady to my harem." Harry sighed, scooping Jessir into his arms. "At least I still have my sexy night elves."
"You think I'm sexy?" Jessir asked, smiling and putting her arms around him.
"Very." Harry nodded firmly.
"Arko, Harry thinks I'm sexy." The inebriated huntress giggled.
"I heard." The other night elf rolled her eyes, turning to look at him. "Take it easy on her, will you?"
"Too late, I've already gone hard on her."
Jessir burst out into laughter at the bad pun, half because of the pun itself and half because of the look on Arko's face.
"Just… get out of here." The moonlight paladin pinched the bridge of her nose, wondering if maybe she should have gotten drunk too.
Jessir had been nibbling on his ear with her pointy canine teeth the whole trip up to the bedroom, so Harry was pretty worked up by the time they made it there and threw her – gently – on to the bed.
Jessir landed with a small 'oof' and giggled at him, wiggling with obvious eagerness. Her silver eyes glowed in the gloom.
"You like what you see?" She asked teasingly, running her hands up her body.
"Oh yes." Harry affirmed, quickly undressing. Some spells were used to expedite the process.
"So do I." Jessir said, her eyes fixed on his erection, biting at her lower lip.
His shaft twitched at the seductive sight. Was it only the drink loosening her up enough to act like this or was it something that would come to her naturally she felt more settled in to the relationship? Harry couldn't wait to find out.
He plucked the sandals from her feet and knelt on the bed, first running his hands up her long, smooth legs and then following it up with a trail of kisses and bites. The hem of her dress rode up until it got stuck around her waist, exposing the fact that night elves apparently didn't believe in underwear.
"Have I ever told you how much I appreciate your sense of fashion?" He purred, slowly crawling over her body.
"You did say I look good in a dress." Jessir smiled at him.
"Oh, you look good in anything, but…" He took a firm grip on her neckline. "…you look especially good in nothing!" And he ripped it apart.
Jessir gapsed in surprise at the unexpected action. "Harry! I liked that dress!"
"I'll get you a new one." He asserted and kissed her aggressively, twining the fingers of his left hand with her right, while his right hand caressed her left body.
Jessir returned the kiss with equal enthusiasm and tried to pull him more firmly on top of her, but he resisted. The foreplay was not yet over.
He disengaged from her mouth and started moving downwards, laying a trail of kisses down her neck and nibbling at the sweet spot he knew she had on her collarbone. Only once he considered her sufficiently riled up did he move on, giving each breast and nipple a minute of attention before sliding further down.
Finally, he found himself before her weeping womanhood and took a deep breath.
"Ah, I do love the smell of your arousal." He said, staring at her with a smirk.
If she was completely sober that might have embarrassed her. As it was, she just smirked back and spread her legs wider. "Why don't you have a taste, then?"
"Don't mind if I do." Harry replied and dove in.
Jessir moaned and bucked her hips at him, her hands twisting the sheets. He made sure to take his time, slowly building up her pleasure and teasing her towards a climax, but not going too far.
Once he deemed her ready, he pulled away, much to her mewling protest. Harry caught her grasping hands and intertwined his fingers with her, pinning them next to her head. Then he pulled himself up and positioned himself at her entrance, slowly rubbing his length over her slick nether lips.
"Stop teasing me!" She protested, wrapping her legs around his waist and trying to maneuver him inside her.
"Oh, I thought night elves were supposed to have the patience of the ages." He teased, easily keeping his tip away so that she wasn't able to get what she wanted.
"Grrrr." Jessir growled and bared her teeth at him, panting with denied lust.
Harry leaned over her and gave her a gentle kiss. "Just relax. You'll enjoy this."
She melted into the kiss almost immediately, ceasing her struggled. In turn, he maneuvered his hips so that his tip was poking her entrance, just enough to barely part the silky, slick flesh.
Jessir gasped against his mouth and once again tried to rush him. All those years of life and she was still just a young woman in the early stages of discovering how much she enjoyed having sex. It was kind of cute.
"Patience." He purred at her and stopped moving, refusing to budge until she submitted to his pace.
The huntress made a sound of frustrating and dug her fingers into the back of his hands, which were still pinning her own hands to the bed around her head, but desisted and relaxed her body.
Harry started moving again, prodding into her with his member in tiny increments before pulling back out. Every time Jessir tried to rush him, he would stop until she ceded control completely.
It took nearly ten minutes of this excruciating pace before he was completely sheathed inside her, and once it did happen, Harry reached forward with his soul to embrace her.
Jessir had been gasping for air for some time already, clearly drifting close to the edge of orgasm from both his earlier licking and the excruciatingly slow pace, but the combined sensation of having him fully inside her and feeling his reaching out to her made the breath catch in her throat.
It was a level of closeness that went beyond verbal communication and to experience it with someone she knew for only a relatively short amount of time caught her very much off guard.
"Harry?" She whispered to him, not even sure what she was asking.
He smiled down at her reassuringly. "Hey, you want to get married?"
With the connection between them open, she knew he was being absolutely serious. The depth of feeling he had for her wasn't as much as it was for Luna, not nearly, but the potential was there.
"Just like that?" She asked, still whispering.
"Just like that." He gave her another kiss. "I like you and I'm too old to pussyfoot around the matter."
Jessir wiggled underneath him happily, unable to contain her feelings even if this was going ludicrously fast by night elf standards. "Only if Arko also agrees to it."
"I'll ask her the moment she walks through the door." Harry assured and leaned down for another kiss, resuming his slow thrusting motions.
Jessir groaned quietly as she felt him slowly penetrating her. She did her best to reach out with her own soul the way he had been teaching her to do and sighed euphorically when she felt them becoming one in spirit as well as body.
The darkness she could sense inside him would have frightened her not so long ago, but now it just excited her. A man that wasn't at least a little scary would have been…boring.
Harry let go of her hands and braced himself on his elbows, making his thrusts deeper and harder, but keeping the same pace. Jessir clawed at his back in her desire to get him to pick up some speed, but he deliberately stayed methodical.
Keeping a woman close to the edge of orgasm was an art form. Feeling her pleasure through their link, seeing her expression twist and hearing her ragged breathing, a turn on greater than any physical sensation.
"I'm almost there, Jessir." He told her in a low growl.
"I can feel you." She gasped out, already shuddering with the first shocks of imminent orgasm. "Fill me up, Harry!"
With a deep groan, he thrust himself as deep as he could and let go, splashing thick ropes of hot cum against the entrance to her womb.
Jessir cried out and shuddered as she was filled, wrapping her legs around him and clenching tightly so that she could squeeze out every last drop from him. Their connection and the properties magically imbued into his seed extended her orgasm until she was a shivering mess, still milking his rod even after it had released its full load.
"A woman is at her most beautiful immediately after giving birth to one's child, but right after you've fucked her silly is also pretty good." Harry quipped with a grin, only slightly out of breath from his own powerful release.
That surprised a breathless laugh out of the tired night elf.
"You sure know how to flatter a girl." Jessir said, inwardly wondering what their babies would look like. She hadn't been planning on having any for at least a couple of thousand years more, but given the pace at which their relationship was going….
Surprisingly, she didn't find herself minding the idea too much.
"It's the truth." He smirked.
"Mmm." She hummed, closing her eyes. The aftershocks of her orgasm were fading now. With her head still feeling pleasantly buzzed from the alcohol and the warmth pooling in her belly, she was quickly drifting off to sleep. "I'm going to take a little nap… don't forget to propose to Arko."
"Will do." He promised and gently pulled out of her, laying a kiss on her forehead before covering her with the sheets.
Harry stared at the iron tube he had liberated from C'thun's stomach with a smile. He knew what it was now.
It didn't take much to find out. The unassuming object was old and had a strong identity, even if it was just part of the whole. Only a small amount of meditation upon it was enough for it to give up its name.
Atiesh, the Greatstaff of the Guardian.
Once the staff wielded by the Guardian of Tirisfal, before Sargeras pulled a fast one on Aegwynn and corrupted the office.
Frankly, Harry thought it was always pretty stupid to be putting all your eggs into one basket like that. And it was especially stupid to leave a person entrusted with so much power capable of siring children. They should have been ceremonially wedded to their duty, preferably in a ritual that sterilized them.
Well no matter, their screw up was his gain. Atiesh was up for grabs and he was definitely going to grab it. The ancient staff's vast power aside, its raven motif meant he already had a connection to it.
There was just one teeny-tiny problem. It was currently in forty-four pieces, forty-three of which his scrying spells discerned were somewhere in the Eastern Plaguelands. A small mining expedition through his memory confirmed that the pieces were definitely in the hands of Kel'thuzad, the Lich King's right-hand man and current master of Naxxramas.
"Like hell am I challenging that bony bastard in this body." Harry snorted to himself.
For all that the 'man' was a lackey, there was no getting around the fact that he was probably the most powerful necromancer on Azeroth, not counting the Lich King himself. Facing him with his currently lacking magic resistance seemed unwise.
He would have to finish working on the new bodies, then ask Jaina to contact Thrall so Thrall could contact Sylvanas, then he could get the Banshee Queen's cooperation in mounting an assault on the necropolis. Fortunately, his undead restoration scheme was pretty much finished and only needed a few final touches to be deemed complete. And he might as well do the Fidelius thing for the corpse of C'thun's avatar while he was at it.
And he couldn't dawdle either. Just as he had been able to scry for the rest of the staff using Atiesh's base, Kel'thuzad would be able to scry for the base using the pieces in his possession. It was only a matter of time before he made an attempt to retrieve it and Harry would prefer to be on the offensive.
"So, this is what you've been working on all this time?" Arko questioned, walking around the rune-engraved elementium skeleton.
It hadn't taken Harry too long to figure out how to get his hands on enough elementium to even get started on the project. The ore itself was essentially a fusion of all four elements from the Elemental Plane, so to conjure up the ore, he had needed to figure out how to draw on fire, water, earth and air once.
Not an excessively difficult thing to do for a mage of his skill, especially as he already had an elementium sample on hand to work backwards from.
Then had come the much more difficult task of learning how to work it. The otherwordly metal, if it could even be called that, could absorb and channel elemental forces and needed a searingly hot forge, as well as both water and air of high purity.
The next issue was that once it was tempered and set into place, elementium became indestructible, leaving him with only a limited window of opportunity to engrave the required runes.
Finally was its weight, which was only partially physical. Most of its immense weight came from the fact that it held within it the metaphysical weight of all of Azeroth's landmass. That made getting around the issue… tricky.
"Yep." Harry nodded proudly. "In theory, not only should it make our skeletons completely invulnerable, but we should also take on some of the elementium's ability to absorb and channel elemental forces. I'm not entirely sure what form that will take – It could either manifest as a sort of resistance to the elements or as a heightened aptitude for elemental magic. Are you feeling tempted to change your mind about keeping your current bodies yet?"
"Not really." Jessir replied drily at his blatant attempt at bribery and decided to change the subject. "What's with the chest, though? I thought human ribs looked the same as elven ones?"
"They normally do, however." Harry tapped the solid, single piece chest plate that the elementium skeletons sported. "There's really no reason to leave a gap for someone to slip a knife, through. Our current bodies weren't made for combat, these are."
"But will my boobies still look good?" Luna asked the important question.
"Yes, your boobs will still look fantastic." He replied dutifully.
"And will my milk get multiple flavors?"
"You'll need to cast a spell on the food you want it to taste like before eating it, but yes."
"What about my vagina?"
"Same deal, slightly different spell."
"What about your sperm."
"As if I'd be so inconsiderate as to forget."
"If I use that spell on an alcoholic drink, can people get drunk from drinking my breast milk?"
Harry paused as he considered that one. "I'm…. not sure. In theory, it should only be the taste that carries over, but alcohol is a finicky substance. If you drank enough booze with that spell on it, there is a chance that it would bond to your breast milk or vaginal excretions in a high enough concentration to conceivably get someone drunk…..if they drank an excessive amount."
"Sounds like something we'll need to test." Luna nodded to herself, holding her chin contemplatively.
"Aye." Harry agreed, now equally curious.
Jessir and Arko exchanged long-suffering looks, the kind of looks that communicated 'how did we get involved with these two?'.
"Oooh, and you said you were going to make us half-trolls!" Luna suddenly remembered. "Did you do that?"
"Well, not half troll, but there should be enough troll in there to give us a significant regeneration factor."
"I still don't understand why you'd want to be part troll." Jessir grumbled.
"Awww, are you jealous that he didn't pick night elves?" Luna teased, hugging the huntress.
"No." Jessir lied. "But… trolls?!"
"My dear, trolls are the master race." Harry told her solemnly.
"What?!" Arko blurted out in shock.
"Trolls might very well be Azeroth's original inhabitants and are definitely the most biologically advanced species on it. Even without factoring in their regeneration, they are tall, strong, dexterous and most importantly adaptable. You could put a tribe of ice trolls into a desert and, instead of dying like anyone else, two or even a single generation later they'd have become sand trolls."
The two night elves had mulish looks on their faces as they could not deny that trolls did have these qualities. "They're still savages."
"True." Harry agreed. "The only reason they hadn't taken over the world ages ago is because of their lower than average intelligence as compared to most other races, their superstitious approach to magic and their extreme tribalism. As always, the best thing about a race is also the worst thing about it, and the trolls' adaptability means that their race is forever doomed to be fractured into hundreds of tribes. That is irrelevant to my purposes, however."
"Night elves are still better." Jessir insisted.
"You're definitely prettier." He grinned, getting smiles out of them. "Unfortunately, night elves as a species are too young to offer anything beyond their magical sensitivity, which we don't need."
"What?!" They exclaimed again.
"What do you mean 'young'?!" Arko demanded incredulously.
"Night elves are one of the oldest mortal races on Azeroth." Jessir backed her up.
"Are you really?" Harry countered. "If we say that it's been twenty thousand years since Elune transformed a tribe of dark trolls into the first night elves…" And hadn't that revelation burned them. "… and take into account how long it takes for you to fully mature and have children, we are looking at a race that is, at most, twenty generations old."
"So, why does that matter?" Jessir asked.
"It matters because a race becomes stronger by evolving in response to threats in the environment around it. I'm sad to say, but your race hasn't even evolved a proper survival instinct, much less anything more advanced."
"How can you say that?!" Arko was starting to get a bit angry at the perceived insult to her kind. "We used to have an empire spanning most of Azeroth. How would we have managed that if we weren't strong?"
"Hey, calm down." Luna shushed, hugging her from behind. "He's not insulting you."
Arko took a deep breath and stared at him. "Alright, explain."
"Your military is comprised almost entirely of women." Harry pointed out.
"That you don't see what the problem is proves my point perfectly. Your women, the child-bearing half of your population, comprises your primary defense against external threats to your existence. Do you know how you destroy a people? You target their reproductive lynchpin, their women. Seems a bit counter-intuitive, doesn't it?"
"Night elven women are strong, we don't need to hide behind men." Jessir huffed.
"Your strength is irrelevant." Harry waved away her argument like it was fart gas. "If a race loses half of its men, that's a serious loss, but the numbers can be recovered because the remaining half can easily impregnate all the women. If a race loses half of its women, then that is a catastrophe from which it won't recover for a long time. Any race that has survived long enough has a an instinctive collective awareness of this, and the mere idea of its women being in danger is repugnant on a bone-deep level, but your men don't object to you serving in war and your women don't shy away from violence. Like I said, no racial survival instinct, because night elves haven't seen enough generations to evolve one."
Arko and Jessir weren't sure what to say, so Harry continued in a slightly gentler tone of voice. "If you want, we can go take a walk around Stormwind and talk to some of the people. Ask them some questions about what they think of women being in the army or other dangerous professions. If you know what you're looking for, it's not hard to find the survival instinct that drives the opinions behind the answers they'll give."
Jessir and Arko exchanged looks of consternation and seemed to come to a mutual decision. "We need to think about what you said first."
"Now let's get body-switching!" Luna bounced in place eagerly.
"Is Elune even alright with you doing this?" Arko wondered dubiously, willingly leaving the previous topic behind.
"I'm a big girl that can make her own decisions." Luna countered chirpily.
Arko was stumped. It was true that Elune didn't make many demands on how her followers lived their lives, but surely her opinion had to count for something with something this important?
Harry just quirked an amused eyebrow at the byplay and started explaining. "We'll have to do this a little differently than the last time. The elementium is just too damn heavy, even these skeletons weigh a metric ton, each, and there is no simple way to get around it. I've designed the wombs to absorb our souls, which will then provide the blueprint for how the flesh will grow over the bones, which will also override the elementium's conceptual link to Azeroth's landmass and leave only its physical weight behind."
"Oh." Luna tilted her head sideways. "And how long will that take?"
"About a week."
Jessir and Arko had elected to wait inside the Time Chamber until Harry and Luna were 'reborn'. A week wasn't really that long a time for a night elf and they wanted to be there when it happened because, despite being rather put off by the entire concept, they were still both worried and curious.
When the magical alarm indicating that it was about to happen went off, they rushed towards the room they had been avoiding most studiously thus far.
After all, who would want to spend time in a room that had disgusting fleshy growths crawling up the wall? Harry had dismissed their concerns with a cavalier 'we're made of the same stuff', proving that he had no grasp on how creepy it all was.
"I think it's happening…?" Jessir said uncertainly, seeing the two artificial wombs contracting.
"Gross…" Arko grimaced, struggling with the urge to look away as the extra large vaginal canal opened up and spilled forth a small river of birthing fluids.
Thankfully, unlike a normal birth that could take hours and usually needed a great deal of effort on the mother's part to do, two fully grown bodies easily slid out and onto the floor and immediately began vomiting to expel the gunk from their lungs.
Jessir and Arko didn't wait and let loose on them with the specially enchanted flasks that had been made just for this purpose. As soon as the corks were popped, powerful streams of water spewed forth, hosing down the two 'newborns'.
"Thank you." Harry said sarcastically once it was over and the worst of the gunk had been hosed off.
"You're welcome." Jessir and Arko chorused brightly, ignoring the sarcasm. They knew that they should have waited a bit before starting, but Harry and Luna had honestly looked disgusting.
"That was a lot less comfortable than the previous method." Luna commented, her voice still a little hoarse from the vomiting. "Let's not do that again."
"Are you alright?" Arko asked.
"I'm bald." Luna noted, rubbing a hand over her egg-smooth dome. "I don't think I like it."
Harry turned to look, but was distracted from the baldness by another detail. "Your ears are pointed."
"Huh?" Luna felt for them and smiled brightly upon realizing that he was right. "They are! So are yours, and your eyes are glowing."
"So are yours." Harry echoed. Luna's eyes had been glowing a soft silver ever since she became a priestess of Elune, but now the glow was noticeably brighter, no doubt a side effect of the body's magic saturation.
Feeling a sudden concern, he reached up to feel his nose and exhaled in relief. "I'm just glad our noses are normal. I'd hate to have that pointy beak of a thing trolls have on their faces."
"That would not have been cute at all." Luna agreed and they continued checking each other out for differences.
The two toed-feet and three-fingered hands were always out of the question given the pre-made nature of the skeletons, as were the tusks, but there didn't seem to be much else in the way of physiological changes. They both felt stronger, which made sense given the fact that he had used the flesh of the native humans as a base alongside the troll blood.
Self-inspection complete, Luna turned to the two night elves. "What do you think about the ears? Should we keep them or should Harry fleshcraft them back to roundness?"
"They're still pretty small, but they look better pointed than rounded." Jessir opined.
"Definitely." Arko agreed.
Harry snorted in amusement. Of course night elves would think that.
"Alright then, let's get some Hair Growth Potion and put this very uncomfortable experience behind us."
Jaina Proudmoore, archmage and ruler of Theramore, did not bend to threats or pressure, so how was it that she ended up hosting a private dinner between herself, Harry, Luna and their new night elven lovers despite not wanting to?
Ah yes, because Harry had sent a glowing silver raven messenger to her, telling her that he had something important to discuss. Immediately afterwards, a glowing rabbit followed behind and spoke in Luna's voice, saying that they should talk about it over dinner and informing her that they would be there the next evening.
It was incredibly presumptuous, rude and inconsiderate to impose like that, especially on such short notice, but of course, Luna was operating on a different strain of logic. The worst part was that the moonbrained priestess of Elune genuinely meant no harm, so Jaina would have felt like she was kicking a puppy if she told her off for it.
Now here she was, dressed in a white and purple evening gown and waiting for her guests to arrive, almost completely sure that at least half of the dinner would consist of Harry and Luna trying to seduce her into their relationship.
She sensed the familiar tingle of an incoming teleport and a moment later the group of four appeared. Harry, Luna and who she assumed were the 'Jessir' and 'Arko' Luna had mentioned when they last spoke, all just as dressed up as her. All three women wore matching silver dresses that flattered their figures and strappy sandals, while Harry was in a dark dress robe.
It was immediately apparent to her that there was something different about Harry and Luna, and not just because their eyes were visibly glowing now. They just didn't feel quite the same.
"Welcome to Theramore." Jaina said formally, smiling politely, shelving her questions for now.
"Jaina!" Luna ignored politeness and hopped forward, grabbing her hands. "That gown looks great on you."
"Even if I do already miss your belly." Harry teased, gently pushing the two night elves forward. "Jaina, these are Jessir Moonbow and Arko'narin." He said, indicating first the silver-haired and then the teal-haired night elf. "Girls, meet Jaina Proudmoore, we're all going to be very close with her once she stops being stubborn."
Jaina sighed and resisted the urge to palm her face.
"We're sorry about him." Arko said, grabbing one of Harry's arms and holding it tightly.
"Yes…" Jessir did the same to his other arm, effectively trapping him in between them. "He can't seem to help himself when he sees an interesting female. He tried to seduce a dragon just a couple of days ago."
It said something that this came as no surprise at all. The only surprise was that they were pinning it all on Harry when Luna was just as bad. Then again, they might simply not be comfortable speaking ill of a priestess of Elune.
"This is mutiny." Harry commented mildly. "Wives are supposed to support their husband, not get in the way of his ambitions."
The two night elves actually blushed at that and were visibly flustered at being called wives. "We aren't married yet."
Yet?! Jaina thought with muted shock. They really had somehow roped two night elves into their relationship. HOW? Night elves took forever to do anything! Courtships in their culture frequently took centuries or even millennia to come to fruition. Had Luna not been a priestess of Elune, she would have immediately assumed foul play.
"We can elope with Jaina and have Tyrande perform the ceremony right after dinner!" Luna suggested excitedly.
"Hey, don't bring me into this!" Jaina hastily fended off, fearful that the bigger blonde would simply decide on that kind of thing all by herself.
"But I want to?" Luna countered, honestly confused.
Harry snickered at her consternation and she shot him a dirty look before taking a deep breath and deciding to just move past… whatever this was. "Come with me to the dining room, our dinner is waiting for us."
Jaina tried to extricate her hands from Luna's grip, but the priestess merely shifted things around so they were arm in arm and began walking. Turning to complain about this, the words got lost in her throat when she spotted Luna's ears. Her very pointed ears.
"Why are your ears pointed?" She blurted out in shock, being quite certain that they used to be as rounded as that of any human.
"Because we're part troll now." Luna chirped, looking down at her with sparkling silver eyes. "Aren't they cute?"
"What do you mean 'part troll'?" Jaina turned to look at Harry, figuring that he would be more likely to give a straight answer.
"Our old bodies were a bit too weak, so Luna and I had to upgrade and I figured that we might as well add in some troll regeneration." He explained smugly. "I'd be happy to tell you all about it while we relax together in a hot tub."
"Or we could talk about it over dinner?" She suggested instead.
"We could, but that sounds a lot less fun."
It was going to be a long night.
The serious parts of the dinner conversation really didn't take long, which meant that the rest of the time was spent on teasing Jaina and flirting with her. Even Jessir got in on that action once she relaxed a bit.
"Don't you think you should stop this?" The paladin asked with a concerned frown once they were settled into the guest rooms in Theramore. Luna had insisted on having a sleepover.
"Stop what?" Luna asked cluelessly.
"Trying to seduce Jaina Proudmoore."
"Now what makes you say that?" Harry quirked an eyebrow at her.
"She's obviously not interested." The night elf pointed out.
"Is that what it looks like?" Harry continued to be smug.
"I mean, yeah…" Jessir nodded. Even if she had done some teasing of her own, it seemed pretty clear to her that Jaina Proudmoore wasn't letting herself be drawn in.
"She's not not-interested." Luna countered.
"Huh? What is that supposed to mean?" The two night elves cocked their heads in confusion.
Harry went over and put his hands around their shoulders, still smirking smugly. "Ah, my inexperienced darlings, you're looking in the wrong direction. Yes, Jaina may have spent the whole time shooting down our advances, but tell me, did she ever look repulsed, angry or insulted?"
The two night elves paused and thought it over, realizing that he was right. "No…"
"That's because she's flattered by the attention, no matter how much she'll deny it even to herself, and doesn't actually want us to stop." He continued in a sage tone.
"But she'll come around." Luna added enthusiastically, joining in on the hug.
"Indeed. Because she doesn't want us to stop she'll keep letting us push her boundaries as we creep deeper and deeper into her life until it's too late to escape, mwahahahaha!" Harry laughed maniacally.
"Mwahahaha!" Luna tried to sound evil, but didn't quite manage it.
Arko and Jessir stared at them with identical deadpan expressions.
"Come on, you're supposed to laugh evilly." Luna pouted.
"The trick is to do it from deep in the chest." Harry advised. "Like so: MWAHAHAHAH!"
Back in her study, catching up on the paperwork backlog the unexpected dinner caused her, Jaina shivered, suddenly feeling like she was in danger.
OMAKE – If Jaina Attended the Party
Jaina woke up with a stabbing pain in her head and a foul taste in her mouth. All she could do was let out a miserable whimper and bury her face deeper into the warm softness in front of her.
"Here, drink this." A soft voice said, pressing something into her hand.
Feeling too wretched to even bother questioning the voice, Jaina fumblingly brought the vial to her lips and drank. The vaguely unpleasant taste spoke of a potion, but it cleared up her head and mouth instantly, so the taste was immediately deemed irrelevant.
Now feeling human again, Jaina cautiously opened her eyes and took stock of the situation.
She was in a very large bed and distressingly not alone. The 'pillow' she had been cuddling into was purple and breathing.
Looking up, she saw the teal-haired night elf, Arko smiling at her awkwardly. "Good morning."
"Nooo…." Jaina despaired, realizing what had happened. She knew being around Harry, Luna and alcohol was a bad idea.
"Awww, come on, don't be like that." Luna cooed from behind her, pressing her heated body flush against her back. "You enjoyed yourself well enough last night."
Flashes of memory passed through her mind that made her face boil. Yes, she had certainly enjoyed herself last night. Entirely too much, even.
"I didn't expect her to be such a screamer." Jessir popped up from behind Arko, grinning teasingly. "I guess you really can't judge a book by its cover."
"Just kill me now." Jaina moaned in embarrassment, doing her very best to curl up into a fetal position and vanish.
She could try getting angry at them for taking advantage of her while she was drunk, but she had been taught to take responsibility for her actions. She was the one that kept drinking despite knowing perfectly well what kind of company she was in.
"Oh, you want to have sex again?" Luna asked, audibly perking up. Her hands were already wandering. "I figured you would want to eat and clean up first, but we could probably squeeze in a quickie before Harry comes back."
Jaina jerked in surprise when she felt her boobs being groped and quickly sat up on the bed. "No, thank you. Actually, I should get back to Theramore." She rattled out nervously.
"But we just got together!" Luna pouted in protest, reaching out for her.
Jaina avoided her hand like a skittish deer, keeping a wary eye on both her and the two night elves that were now rising from the bed. "I'm sorry, this was a mistake."
"Oh, a mistake, was it?" A deep male voice came from behind.
Jaina froze and slowly turned around, getting an eyefull of naked Harry – because of course he was naked. There were also several bowls levitating in the air behind him.
She looked away and tried to scoot around him. "Sorry, I'll just let myself out…"
"No." He denied and reached into one of the bowls. "Have a mini-croissant."
She had been just about to say something else when he shoved the pastry into her mouth. Biting down reflexively, she absently noted that the bread was soft and fluffy and the fruit jam filling it was deliciously sweet.
"You're going to stay here and let us love you." Harry continued assertively.
"Uh-huh. No backsies and no running away." Luna agreed, coming up from behind.
"It's for the best, they'd never let you escape anyway." Arko added. Blocking her left side.
"And you really are quite adorable." Jessir finished, coming up on her right.
Jaina nervously swallowed the delicious pastry and noted that she was completely surrounded by people at least a foot taller than her. Naked people.
She felt Luna lean over to her ear and speak softly. "Resistance is futile."