Hey, everyone! The title of this story was suggested by Melwa Rat, because I'm bad at titles. :/ She's an amazing writer, so go check her stories out, and her rats died recently, so go spam her with sympathy. Just don't tell her that I sent you. ;P

This one-shot is dedicated to KarajeJinsta, for just being an awesome friend! (She's also a member of the Rad Batch.)

This story features my OC, who is actually being reworked for what is at least the seventh time. (And Anakin is also OOC and stupid.)

Disclaimer: Don't the Clone Wars. I do own Elle, though. :D


"He's late," grouched Ahsoka.

"Indeed," said Obi-Wan calmly.

"We shouldn't be surprised," put in Elle. "This was his idea in the first place. Why would he show up to the meeting he planned himself?"

Obi-Wan nodded slowly. "This is rather characteristic of him, now that I think about it."

"I'm here!" Anakin charged into the room.

A Master, a Knight, and a Padawan all gave him stern looks.

"Took you long enough," said Elle. "We're all doing you a favor."

"Psh!" said Anakin. "You all are just thankful I got you out of the mission debriefing."

Obi-Wan raised his eyes heavenward. "If you could just tell us why we're here, Anakin?"

"Right. Well, today is Pad– Senator Amidala's birthday, and since most of her friends are like, boring politicians, who never have any fun, I decided that we should make her a cake to celebrate." Anakin grinned. "Sound like fun?"

"No," replied his friends in unison.

"Not really."

"Nope."

"Sounds annoying, if we have to do it with you."

Anakin pouted. "For Padmé?"

Sighs. "Fine."

"Only for her."

"If you insist."

"Wait, did you just call her Padmé? What happened to 'Senator Amidala'?" asked Ahsoka with narrowed eyes.

Anakin cleared his throat loudly. "So, I thought it'd be easier for us to split into teams, since there are four of us. We can make two cakes, and then put them together in a layer cake."

Elle frowned. "I'm pretty sure that's not how layer cakes work."

"Whatever." Anakin waved a hand. "So how do we want to break up?"

"Boys and girls?" suggested Ahsoka.

"No," said Obi-Wan immediately.

"Master and Padawan teams?" tried Elle.

"Definitely not," Ahsoka replied.

"Then how–" started Anakin.

"I CALL MASTER KENOBI!" Ahsoka yelled. She grabbed Obi-Wan by the arm and dragged him to the other end of the kitchen.

"I guess we're together, then!" said Anakin cheerfully to Elle.

Elle groaned.


Ahsoka hefted the datapad she had brought from her room after the teams split up.

"So, Master, what kind of cake do you want to make?"

Obi-Wan steepled his fingers. "I'm not sure. I'm not the one with the Senator's likes, dislikes, and habits memorized."

Ahsoka snickered. "So I'm not the only one with eyes in my head? Skyguy is not good at hiding his thing for Padmé."

"He never has been. But he doesn't need to know that we know, now does he?"

Ahsoka saluted playfully. "Of course not, Master Kenobi. Ooh, look, 'Perfect Easy Vanilla Cake'!"

"Hm," said Obi-Wan. "That sounds promising." He took the datapad and scrolled through the recipe, nodding approvingly. "That could certainly work. We just need to make sure the dream team uses the same pan size." He jerked his head toward the other side of the large room, where Elle and Anakin were arguing.

"They… probably will," said Ahsoka. "I don't want to ask. I seriously doubt Elle has patience to spare."

Obi-Wan opened his mouth, watched his former Padawans for a moment, and then closed it. "You're right. Let us make our cake."

Ahsoka nodded in confirmation and began gathering their ingredients. In a few minutes, the batter filled pans were slid into the oven, and Ahsoka and Obi-Wan began to clean up.

"Well, that wasn't so hard," said Obi-Wan.

"Nope!" Ahsoka grinned. "Now we can enjoy the show!"


Several minutes earlier…


Elle pulled out her retrieved datapad and looked expectantly at Anakin. "So what kind of cake should we make?"

"I don't know!" said Anakin quickly. "Why would I know Padmé's random cake preferences? Haha. That's weird. I wouldn't know these things."

Elle raised an eyebrow. "Okay…"

"Ooh, let's make that!" Anakin pointed at random to a recipe. "That looks great. I think we should make that."

"Uh… sure. Can you get the ingredients?"

"Why can't you?"

"Seriously, Anakin? I'm asking you to get a few ingredients while I preheat the oven and prepare the pans. Is that too much to ask?"

"Maybe."

"It'll take you like, a minute! Just do it!"

"Eh…"


Several minutes of arguing later…


Obi-Wan and Ahsoka seated themselves on a counter to laugh at their friends.

Elle sighed, exasperated and not caring the other team was already done. "Fine! Just come with me. Do you even know the ingredients we need?"

"…"

"Here is the oven," Elle said slowly. "We use it to bake things. I will preheat it so it can warm up before we put the cake in."

Anakin rolled his eyes. "I know what an oven is."

"Really? I am shocked," responded Elle drily. "Is it too much to assume you know what a cake pan is?"

Anakin made a face. "No. I know what they are, too. What size to we need?"

"Nine inch."

"Um…"

"Nine inches across the widest part of the circle."


"Ha HA! I found one!"

"Took you long enough. Now get the ingredients. Please."

Anakin, recognizing determination when he saw it, started to get the ingredients. In a few seconds there was a gagging sound. "This smells disgusting!"

"Anakin, buttermilk is supposed to smell like that."

"Ew!"

"Why are you even getting buttermilk out? It's not in the recipe."

"I figured we could use this, since the recipe had butter and milk. Then we could save a step."

Elle rolled her eyes. "Um, no. Buttermilk is not butter and milk combined."

"Why not?"

"How should I know why it was named that? Just get out the butter and milk."

Anakin got out the butter and milk, grumbling all the while.

"Now, we need to soften the butter. Heat it up, a few seconds at a time, until it's soft. You can do that, right?"

"Of course I can!"

"Good. I'll get the rest of the ingredients while you do that." Once Elle was done gathering ingredients, she walked over to Anakin. "Done?"

"Yep," said Anakin proudly. "I was extra thorough!"

Elle facepalmed. "We want it softened, not melted."

"Oh."

"Get more butter out. We are going to try this again." Elle thought. "Actually, do you think you can handle combining the dry ingredients while I do this? Not even you could mess that up."

"Psh. No problem!"


Anakin got out a bag of flour and opened it. "Hey look, this flour is like snow!" He said with a cheerful grin. "Let's pretend we're on Hoth!"

"Anakin, no!" It was too late. Both Anakin and Elle disappeared in the cloud of white. When the flour settled, Elle pursed her lips.

"That flour is lighter than you think it is."

"Yeah, I think I figured that out."

"I'm… going to go clean up. I would suggest you do the same."

"Fine."


"Baking soda is basically the same thing as baking powder, right?"

"No! Anakin, don't–" a groan. "You already did."

"Mh hm."

"Why do you have the tablespoon measure out? The recipe calls for two and a half teaspoons."

"Huh. I didn't know there were two different kinds of those tiny spoons. I couldn't read the fine print."

"The labels aren't even that small!"

"They are to me!"

"What does that even mean?! Ugh. Whatever. So you added two and a half tablespoons of baking soda to the mix?"

"Two and a half? I thought it was twenty-one slash two. So I put in twenty-three."

"Twenty-three tablespoons?" Elle pinched the bridge of her nose. "Where did you even find that much baking soda?!"

Anakin shrugged. "I looked for it."

Another groan. "Can you hand me the sugar before you restart the dry ingredients?"

"Um… I already dumped them into the wet ingredients."

Elle facepalmed again. "Well, I needed to add it to the butter and eggs."

"Okay." Anakin shrugged. "Just do it anyway."

"…Anakin, this is salt."

"Oh."


"Anakin. Even though they look slightly similar, cocoa powder and caf grounds are two different things."


"Woah… It's so hypnotic to watch the mixer mix the batter." Anakin stood over the mixer, staring in awe at the movement of the tool through what would hopefully end up as something edible.

"Anakin! Has that been mixing this whole time?" asked Elle from the sink where she was washing dishes.

"Yeah. It's so cool to look at!"

"But it's been more than five minutes since I moved!"

"Yep."

"The longer you mix the batter, the tougher the cake is! You're not supposed to keep mixing it once everything's smooth!"

"Oh. Oops."

Elle dried her hands and crossed the kitchen in quick strides. She looked into the bowl. "Okay… We're going to have to start this over."


"Finally. We're done for real. Batter's all finished." Elle unnecessarily dusted her hands off and pushed the bowl of batter toward Anakin. "That took way longer than it should have."

Anakin peered down. "Cool. Hey, I bet it'll taste amazing!"

"Anakin, you're not supposed to taste it until after it's baked!"

As usual, Anakin payed no attention to Elle. He made a face after sticking the batter covered finger into his mouth.

"Yuck! That is nasty!"

Elle frowned. "It shouldn't be… What's it taste like?"

"Taste it yourself!"

"Sticking fingers into mixing bowls is unhygienic. Do you really think I would do that?"

Anakin snorted. "Medics," he muttered.

Elle looked at him severely. "My hearing is better than humans. I heard that. And it's true!"

"Whatever. It tastes… Salty. Gross."

"What?"

"Salty."

"That makes no sense, unless…" Elle groaned yet again. "I thought I told you to give me the sugar, not the salt! I put the salt over…" she looked. The salt was gone. "Over there. How did you even find, like, two cups of salt? That makes no sense."

Anakin shrugged. "I looked for it."

A sigh. "Fine, let's try this a fifth time."


"ANAKIN!"

"What?" asked Anakin defensively. "That wasn't my fault!"

"Yes, it was. You just sent batch number five flying."

"Well– Well it was an accident!"

"I sure hope it was." Elle began to consider just running. Maybe Ahsoka and Obi-Wan could make another cake for the second layer. Hm…

"Time for attempt number six!" Anakin grinned maniacally.

Elle quickly surveyed the kitchen. Ahsoka and Obi-Wan were sitting on a counter, both having the time of their lives. Ahsoka was doubled over laughing, and Obi-Wan had even allowed himself some chuckling.

There was still a huge pile of dishes in the sink, not to mention the indecent amount of broken ones in the bin.

Most of the floor was covered in a dusting of flour. The part that wasn't had a puddle of batter on it, though most of the batter had gotten on Anakin. Well, at least there was some justice in the galaxy.

Elle herself was spotless, since she had had her guard raised after the "flour on Hoth" incident. Battlefield agility and reflexes proved to be quite useful off the battlefield, too.

However, Anakin was covered in flour, salt, eggs, and batter. His hair was a much lighter brown than usual, and the color of his clothes was indistinguishable.

Elle pointed at Anakin. "You are sitting this one out."

"Aw, come on, Saber Eyes." Anakin pouted. "I can be helpful."

"Maybe, but today you've been about as helpful as Jar Jar."

"Please?"

"No. If you don't shut up, you are going to sit in the corner."

"Fine," Anakin huffed. He walked over to the counter and plopped down. His Padawan and former Master immediately scooted farther away from him.

The second Elle's back was turned, Anakin was next to her. "Can I watch?"

"Fine! Just to make you shut up."


"Anakin, give me back my lightsaber!"

"Why? You don't need it for baking, do you?"

"Anakin!"

"Huh. Is this one blue or green?"

"Can't you just ignite it?" asked Ahsoka.

"Not helping, Ahsoka!" Elle growled.

"No, I want a challenge. I'm going to guess without turning it on."

Elle rolled her eyes. "The hilts of my lightsabers are so different! How can you not tell whether that one's green or blue?"

"I bet it's… blue!" Anakin pressed the button on Elle's lightsaber. It was green.

"Kriff."

"My green lightsaber is always on my left side, Anakin. Can I have it back now?"

"Haha! Nope!" Anakin ran from the room.

Elle glared after him. "Ahsoka, go get my lightsaber back. I don't care how you do it. I am going to bake this cake if it's the last thing I do!"

"Challenge accepted!" hollered Anakin from the next room.

Elle muttered several Mando'a curses.

"It's times like now I'm glad I don't know Mando'a," said Obi-Wan.

Elle shot her former master a dirty look, and rummaged in a pocket of her utility belt. She tossed something to him.

"Emergency sedative. Go help Ahsoka. Do you know the spot in the neck? Good. Use it if you have to."


More than an hour later, everything was okay. Anakin was being held securely under a guard of two perplexed clone troopers, Ahsoka had retrieved Elle's lightsaber, and Obi-Wan had even gotten her another sedative to replace the one he had used. Elle's cake was in the oven, and she was making frosting. Without Anakin's "help." Which meant she had no trouble whatsoever and was finished quickly, with no mess.

Elle stretched as she sat down on the floor next to Ahsoka. "So… how did you manage to… subdue him?"

Ahsoka shifted. "Oh, you know…" She waved a hand vaguely. "I have my ways."

Elle laughed. "That's my line."

"Whatever. Is your cake done?"

"Should be in a few. Once it's cooled we can frost it and then get it to Padmé. She had better enjoy it after all I went through to make it. I have no idea how she stands being married to that or'dinii."

Ahsoka elbowed her. "Secrecy, remember?"

"Doesn't, like, everyone know? They are horrible actors."

"It's for Skyguy's benefit."

"Ah."


Anakin rang Padmé's doorbell. None of his companions commented on the fact that he knew exactly where she lived, and was able to drive them there without a second's hesitation. He gestured wildly to Elle, who was holding the stacked and frosted cake.

Elle rolled her eyes but stepped forward and fixed a bright smile on her face.

Padmé's door was opened by C-3PO. "Why hello, Mistress Elkira," he began.

Before Elle could destroy the droid, Padmé appeared, looking surprised. "Ah, hello, everyone!"

"Happy birthday!"

Padmé blinked, then smiled widely. "I forgot it was my birthday. I can't believe all of you remembered!" She saw the cake. "And did you make this?"

Anakin nodded proudly. "I helped."

Behind his back, Elle rolled her eyes again.

Padmé opened the door wider. "Come in!"

She led Elle to her kitchen to set down the birthday cake.

"Try it now!" said Ahsoka gleefully. "Master Kenobi and I made the vanilla layer, and Elle–"

"And me, too!" called Anakin.

"And Elle made the chocolate layer," Ahsoka finished.

Padmé beamed. "That's incredible! I can't thank you all enough."

Anakin happily cut cake for everyone. "The chocolate cake is going to be extra good because I helped," he announced with a smile.

Elle hastily muffled her laughter, a task made harder by Padmé's new apprehension on hearing Anakin say he helped make the cake.

"He didn't actually help with the final product, Padmé, you're safe," she whispered.

The corner of Padmé's mouth twitched, but she managed to finish her birthday cake with a straight face and congratulate Anakin on his baking skills accordingly.

"Definitely the best birthday I've ever had," she said with a smile.

"But you didn't even have a party." Ahsoka looked disappointed.

"Well, I have all you here. Four Jedi seems like a party to me."

"Four?" asked Elle. "I only count three. Three Jedi, and a hooligan."

"I heard that!" Anakin cut in.

"You're not going to do anything special to celebrate your birthday?" Obi-Wan inquired.

Padmé shrugged. "Not really. Just this. But," she began, her eyes twinkling, "if all of you can stay, I do believe there is a cartoon marathon on…"

"YAY!" exclaimed Anakin.

Everyone turned to look at him.

He coughed. "I mean, uh, that's something for you, Snips."

Ahsoka snickered. "Sure. Let's go!"

Obi-Wan watched them run into the next room and start fighting over the remote control, a bemused expression on his face.

Elle laughed. "I heard about the cartoon marathon night."

"Yep," Padmé smiled. "It was fun."

"Of course. Good memories for tonight." Elle grinned.

"Your cake actually tasted quite good."

Elle chuckled. "After all the work I put into it? It had to."

"Did you all have fun baking it?"

"…Yes. We had fun."


Aaand... that's a wrap! What's that you asked? How did Obi-Wan, Ahsoka, Anakin, and Elle find access to a large kitchen full of baking supplies? Don't ask me. I'm only the writer. Maybe it was onboard the Resolute. Maybe it was in the Jedi Temple. Maybe Obi-Wan has a timeshare and a secret life. *shrug* The world may never know.

Or'dinii: Mando'a for "moron."

Well, hopefully you enjoyed dis li'l thing, and will leave me a review on your way out! Thanks for reading, virtual hugs all around, and until we meet again, may the Force be with all of you!

-Em