Full Summary: Senator of Stewjon Obi-wan Kenobi, alongside the roguish Senator of Tatooine Anakin Skywalker, are tasked with the assignment of ensuring the Wizard delegation from a planet called Earth find their time on Coruscant not only pleasant enough for a return visit but to become an integral part of the Republic. With the Clone Wars in full swing, Separatists hiding in every corner, and plots galore, gaining a race of atomic manipulators into congress seems to be the saving hope of many. Many, however, had never met the Wizarding head representative Harriet Potter. Kenobi and Skywalker are in for a big surprise. Anakin/Fem!Harry/Obi-wan.

OR: The one where everyone is in politics, and the galaxy is an absolute shit-show.


Prologue:

Pawns and Kings


Obi-wan Kenobi


I

It was universally believed that chess was a game. Senator Obi-wan Kenobi would ardently disagree. If a decade in the Senate had taught him anything at all it was chess was a way of life. Every piece a place, every square a bloody battlefield, every move a measured response thought not once over but thrice.

Coruscant was a planet where Pawns believed themselves Kings, safe and sound in their Eighth Rank. When Qui-Gon Jinn had begun grooming Kenobi to take over his Senator seat for Stewjon, the first lesson he had taught a young, and arguable naive Kenobi, had been what a lie this had been. Wise men knew, Qui-Gon had finished, that Kings are pawns.

As Senators, their work was to be the mouthpieces for their people, their voice at the galactic tables, and their interests were not their own but millions of lives, a planets worth of hope and fear and dreams resting on one man holding the Senate floor.

A floor that was often bloodstained, brutal, and ruthless.

Their hours were long, their nights short, and privacy was inconsequential. A trip to the lower grounds of Coruscant, even if it were only for a drink at a cantina, could end with a holo-photo spread in the next news cycle, a scandal breaking by dawn, and thirty votes against your new proposal in Senate by another days end.

A Senator's life, Qui Gon had told Kenobi countlessly, was never his own but his peoples.

Obi-wan had taken this message to heart, he had never slipped, not once, no scandal, no disgrace, not even a rumour ghosting from his conduct, which could never be argued as anything but proper and polite, and for nearly two decades as serving Senator, perhaps the only one in the whole Senate, Obi-wan Kenobi was seen as a man who got the job done, a peacekeeper in all ways, and never one to shirk his honour bound duty.

Then, one day, he received a holo-call from Chancellor Palpatine.

Nothing would ever be the same again.


II

"I cannot stress enough how thankful I am for your help, Senator Kenobi. The last three Senators I have tasked with the Wizarding delegation have… Let us say, been indisposed shortly after agreeing. Poor Senator Lukra has still not figured out how to turn his hair back to brown and not that lurid pink."

The hologram hovering over Senator Kenobi's desk flickered for a moment, a waver of blue and white glitches sparking at the corners of Chancellor Palpatine's smile. Kenobi stroked the edges of his own beard in return, trimmed and neat, much like his office, where every data pad had a spot, and every report a drawer to be held in.

"Surely the Wizarding delegation is not so outwardly hostile? We offer only goodwill."

The chancellor chuckled heartily, a croaking noise that spat over the holo-comm.

"Hostile? Oh, no dear boy. Hostile they are not, but their elective representative, Lady Potter, is… Selective."

Kenobi found himself cocking a brow.

"Selective?"

Chancellor Palpatine nodded, a brisk chin tilt that did nothing to hide the mirth lurking in the angles of his face.

"Quite! I have not found a man or woman she can stand for more than a few hours at most. And, as you certainly understand, it is important to gain favour with our soon to be neighbours."

So that was why he was being roped into this mess.

He was the only man left to be pulled in.

"Neighbours if only they agree."

Palpatine nodded.

"Ah, but how foolish if they do not, would you not say? Rumour has it tensions are running high on their home planet between themselves and their less gifted cousins. Tensions that are ready to burst, some would say. They need a home to reform within, a space Coruscant can offer, and we need aid. It would be a most beneficial deal for both the Republic and the Wizarding Ministry."

Perhaps Obi-wan thought, but not much was known about these 'Wizarding' folk, as they called themselves. A race that had seemingly appeared overnight, fresh from their own wars, paranoid and suspicious and, from what Kenobi had heard himself, all a little bit mad. Who knew what they were truly inviting into the Senate? It had taken Stewjon eighty years in consideration, a time of heavy observation, before the Republic Senate had offered them a seat. A year since their arrival, and these Wizards were being offered much the same.

Nevertheless, if half the stories were, in fact, true…

Their help, currently, with so many lives being lost in the war against General Grievous and the Separatists, a war the Republic was losing, was in desperate need indeed.

"Yet it is their choice."

The hologram crackled.

"Of course you are right, Senator Kenobi. I only wish for them to see what we have to offer before they make that decision. I cannot show them that if Lady Potter dismisses my operatives withing minutes of meeting them."

The Chancellor sounded old then, older than he was, pale and weak like parchment and moonlight. Kenobi's head bowed.

"Tell me of this Lady Potter, Chancellor, and I will try my best. I can offer no more."

Obi-wan could have very well have told him they had finally captured Dooku by the Chancellor's response, the way his face, lit in blue, beamed.

"There is not much to say, I am afraid. Not much is known about the Wizarding representative but only a few stories that have branched out. According to some reports, she was a Commander in a civil war where she led her side to victory. In other reports she robbed a bank, and in my favourite tales, she saved her friend from a watery death by an aquatic species in a tournament of all things."

Civil wars, tournaments to the death, thievery… Oh dear.

Perhaps the title Lady was a misdemeanour. By the sounds of it, Scoundrel was a more suitable fit.

"A warrior then."

For once, only once, Kenobi could not hide the distaste flavouring his voice to something sour and cold. Chancellor Palpatine, by obliviousness or ignorance, did not pick up on Kenobi's fermenting mood, as this only seemed to delight him further, keen eyes bright.

"And, permitting to some accounts, immortal too. They call her Master of Death within her inner circle of friends."

Kenobi spluttered.

"Immortal?"

Chancellor Palpatine brandished a flippant hand, his holo visage momentarily blurring and jolting as if his character was too big to be contained by particles of light.

"As I said, Senator Kenobi, only stories I am sure."

Senator Kenobi, however, was less sure.

Again, he found himself asking what Chancellor Palpatine should be asking, what the Republic should be questioning, what the Senate should be debating.

Who were these Wizards really?

Senator Kenobi, however, was questioning just this, and the lack of answers he had unsettled him so.

And that was how he decided to take this task. Right then, right there, bathed in the pale light of a hologram, if only to find the answer to that question before it all blew up in their faces. He would meet this Warrior then, this Lady Potter that sounded not so much a Lady but a rogue, and he would see the truth for himself.

Senator Kenobi straightened behind his desk.

"When are they due to arrive on Coruscant?"

Chancellor Palpatine glanced away for a dash, eyes flicking left to right, possibly reading a data pad Kenobi could not see.

"It is their first trip I believe. We have had difficulty not having our technology malfunction around them, a by-product of their abilities I am informed, and very useful if they do join the Republic. Our Senators ordinarily visit them on their home world, but given the circumstances we thought it might be best to invite them to see what we have to offer for themselves. A small commission, including Lady Potter, will be docking on the Hyperion tower in seven days hence."

Kenobi logged it into his own file, typing on the screen of his holo-log. He had much planning to do if the delegation was arriving so soon.

"I will be there to great our visitors."

Chancellor Palpatine's smile stretched wide across his face.

"Brilliant! I will inform Senator Skywalker."

Kenobi blinked owlishly.

"Senator Skywalker? Why would you need to inform him?"

The hologram of the Chancellor folded his arms behind his back, a movement Kenobi had seen a hundred times before on the Senate floor, just before Palpatine moved in for the kill knowing he was about to win a victory. Part proud, part patronizing.

"As I have said, dear boy, Lady Potter has proven to be most selective. If she does not favour one of you, she might the other, and two Senator's are better than one I always say! Now, I must be off. Take care Senator Kenobi."

"Chancellor, I don-"

It was too late.

The holo-call cut off with a pop.

The Chancellor was gone, and Senator Kenobi felt like he had just lost a game of chess he had not known he had been playing at all, and somewhere, wherever death takes a soul, the ghost of Qui-Gon Jinn was despairing.


NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW: Senator Kenobi and Senator Skywalker meet in preparation of the arrival of the Wizarding delegation, after three years of not seeing each other, and there is a rather unfortunate case of mistaken identity…


A.N: I had a reader request a Anakin/Fem!Harry/Obi-wan story. They said I could do whatever I wanted for it, as long as it's a bit light-hearted and contained smut. I, of course, decided the best course of action was a political-crack-comedy, as you do lol. This is exceedingly AU for both Star Wars and Harry Potter. No, really, really AU. Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this! And I will hopefully see you all soon, until next time, stay beautiful! ~AlwaysEatTheRude21