This is a story that I have been putting off for a long time, so here I am. This is going to be a self-insert story and I don't know if I'll be able to do it right.

I own nothing. All references and properties belong to their respective creaters, RWBY is owned by Rooster Teeth.

'Thoughts'
"Talking"
"Scroll"

3rd Person Main Character, Rose/Xiao Long household

Awkward silence fills the room as I look at the person in front of me sitting a chair is a Fifteen year old boy with medium length black hair and red highlights. He has silver eyes and a pale complexion with a look plastered on his face that practically says, 'I'm waiting'. He's wearing what looks like... Well, if I had to call it anything, I would call it Kurogiri's bartender outfit from My Hero Academia. The only real difference being the color palettes, the button down shirt being red instead of black and the best being black instead of light grey.

As for me, I'm in my late thirties and I basically look like Pitch Black from Rise of the Guardians. You see, in my past life I knew this kid in front of me, he was my childhood friend. We died a long time ago... Okay, in all honesty, he was my first and ONLY friend and we became friends at age twenty.

As I was about to speak up and bring an end to this moment, my old friend beats me to it.

"So what should I call you in this life, Pitch Black or Do-?"

I interrupted him, "Pitch, Pitch will do for now. Though you're free to call me that when our privacy is guaranteed. So, what's your name?"

*sighs* "...Royal Rose, but you can call me Roy."

I put my head into my hands and groaned in exasperation, "It kills me that, while RWBY and DBZ were so great, the creators were terrible at coming up with names for characters."

Roy shrugged, "Still better than Minato Namikaze."

I chuckle a little and look back up at him, "So stupid and simple that it all works out, no need for people to be like Scar."

He smiles before turning serious and asks the big question, "So, what have you done aside from the obvious? You've been here for decades longer than I have, so don't tell me that you didn't do anything, we both know it's not in your nature."

I look up at the ceiling with a ghost of a smile on my face and chuckle, "Where should I start...? When I entered Beacon...? When I graduated...? When Oz finally invited us...? Or just the main plot points...? I'm not going to do a whole "How I Met Your Mother?" and explain it all in one go, it's too long to do it like that and might take years to explain all the plans and changes I've made, and even then I highly doubt you'd be able to remember it all like that. No, I think I'll go down the route CW's Arrow went and tell you when we have time or when things are about to become relevant. And you, how are things holding up on your end? I'd hate to see anything happen to your sisters."

He sighs again and replies, "Fine, I suppose that's fair enough. But only if you answer at least some of my questions and don't be vague, you come across as a total dick when you do that, one wizard is plenty."

"So question for a question then?", I suggest while receiving a nod.

I sigh and prepare myself, "Fine, you first."

He nods at me and asks, "What happened to Summer and is she alive?"

"Starting with the big one, huh? Alright then, but you can't tell anyone especially Ruby. Summer's situation is... complicated. The way to keep her from having a mental breakdown like before is to have enough exposure to what Tai keeps from her. Believe me, I hate myself for having to keep this away from everyone but this is the only way.", I tell him as I show him a genuine sad and tired expression.

He looks at me with frustration and pity before ultimately agreeing to the condition.

I take a deep breath and sigh as I begin my story, "Well unlike what we've heard she didn't go to Grimm Lands alone. I followed her, it took some time for me to catch up to her but... But when I finally did, I found her bleeding in the castle. As to whether she's alive is up for debate..."

He looks at me with suspicion and asks, "What do you mean by, "up for debate" ?"

'I can already feel the headache coming on.'

"What I mean is that the only way to save her was to use my semblance. The reason she isn't here is because she's currently healing, my semblance is incredible at destroying things and fixing them. Unfortunately, Summer's condition was critical and I didn't have the experience I do now using it on living beings. If all goes well she'll be up and on her feet in about ten months.", I smile seeing a look of relief on my friend's face.

"Thank God, at least she's not dead... Alright, your turn"

I look at him and ask, "What is your semblance and how have you gone with your eyes?"

He raises a brow and asks, "Isn't that two questions?"

I smirk as I cross my arms, "Like yours wasn't."

He smirks back and replies, "Touch`e, well my eyes are about as well as you'd expect from some with no teacher. As for my semblance, well, let's just say that Obito has some competition. Why did she leave without telling anyone?"

My eyebrow starts to twitch after hearing what he just told me, this little shit has Kamui. I take a deep breath and answer his next question, "Because they wouldn't help her even if STRQ was getting along as well as season 2 RWBY, she wanted to make a trade with Salem. Her life for family, as long as her loved ones were there Salem and her followers wouldn't touch anyone at least till Ruby graduates."

He grit his teeth and lets out a whispering shout, "Shit! I had a feeling it'd be something like that, but I can't believe she'd get that much out of it."

I nod at him with a straight face as I continue, "There's more, since she saw me save her, the deal didn't fall through and Salem would've been in a position where she could end you all."

Roy's face turns serious and narrows his eyes, " Would've? What did you do?"

"Ah, don't look at me like that. I did what I had to, don't worry, we're still on the same side. Nobody's betraying you all, I'm still on your side.", I raise my hands in a placating manner.

I continued after seeing him relax his muscles, "She and I formed a non-aggression pact, so as long as I don't get directly involved in what Ozpin has planned, you're all safe. There were a few other conditions, but we'll talk about that some other time."

Roy turned curious, "I can get Summer, but why wouldn't she just kill you and be done with you?"

I chuckle with a smug look on my face, "Don't get me wrong we fought for three days before we reached the agreement. But when at the end of the third day we ran out of steam, just because she's immortal doesn't mean her stamina is infinite, mental or physical and definitely not in terms of magic. I had the power to keep fighting but didn't have the means to put her down, meanwhile she had the means to recover from every pounding I gave her but didn't have power to cause enough damage."

He looked at me with a gobsmacked face, "Wait, so are you saying you slept with her?"

I smirk, "Maybe I did, maybe I didn't, or maybe I'm saying it like this just screw with you. In the end, she was on her back gasping for air and told me that I was better than Ozma. It was literally a battle of an unstoppable force versus an unmovable object."

Roy looked at me with his eye twitching, sort of reminds me of when Shifu saw that Po was chosen, and thought, "Don't think about it, either way he's screwing someone. Whether it's Salem or me, he will only continue to get on my nerves. That still begs the question, if it was a REAL battle and not a gag; then what semblance would've been powerful enough to keep her busy for seventy-two hours straight? Knowing Donovan's nature better than anyone, it's probably something hard to predict and even harder to avoid, something fluid perhaps, something frighteningly adaptable, what is it?"

Hum, I think I've had enough fun for the day. Hahaha, it looks like he has an obsession with semblance. He's our own resident Izuku, now that I think about it he does look a bit like him. I wonder if anyone made a fanfiction where the two were paired, that'd been a cute couple.