*Disclaimer: I own nothing of Gainax, Khara, Embassy Pictures, Paramount Pictures, or the works of Simon and Garfunkel.*

Maya had an increasingly-worried look on her face as she drove the red convertible 1966 Alfa Romeo Duetto at speeds she never imagined she could drive.

Now I know how Major Katsuragi feels, she thought briefly. In the background, for some reason she couldn't think of, the instrumental version of "Mrs. Robinson" was playing in the background as she sped along the street. She'd have thought it was coming from the radio, but it didn't cut out as she went through a tunnel. She didn't pay it any mind, since she was only focused on one thing at the moment. She had to find her sempai. She had to prevent Dr. Akagi from making a terrible mistake. She had to get to Ritsuko, before it was too late.

She pulled the car into a gas station, quickly leaped from the driver's seat without needing to open the door, and dashed into the shop, where the attendant-an older, clean-shaven gentleman in a blue uniform-noticed her sudden appearance. The music temporarily faded as Maya spoke to him.

"Quick!" she said loudly with desperation, "Which way to the First United Church on Morobishi Avenue?!" The attendant started to search for words in an attempt to respond, but was cut off briefly by Maya as she urged him to think faster. "Come on, come on! Morobishi Avenue! Moro-"

"Oh, oh, yes, Morobishi Avenue!" the attendant-whose voice resembled that of English dub actor Dan Lorge-started to say with recognition. A flash of memory then came to him, causing him to assume a contemplative stance. "Y'know, I once knew a girl who lived on Morobishi Avenue," he said with a somewhat hammy delivery. "But that was quite a long time ago, back in my younger days..."

"Hold it, hold it, HOLD IT," Maya stopped him before he went any further and walked towards us, leaving the scene in the background. "Seriously, do we really need to put up with this? I don't mean to sound so demanding (that's more Asuka's thing), but couldn't we get a better actor here? Look, I know it's a small part for what's at best a brief scene, but come on-can't we do better than this?"

With that, she got back to her place in the scene just as a production assistant, headphones hanging around his neck, quietly escorted the man previously playing the attendant off the set, while his replacement walked onto where he'd been standing before. The new actor was a taller man with a distinguished-looking mustache. The new actor then started speaking his lines from the top.

"Morobishi Avenue?" he started, in a voice akin to another English dub actor, Michael McConnohie. "Oh, of course, Morobishi Avenue..." Maya briefly looked our way as she nodded with approval over the new actor brought in. "I once knew a girl who lived on Morobishi Avenue," the man described with a more natural, down-to-earth delivery. "But that was quite a long time ago, when I was younger. Not a day's passed by where I haven't thought of her, or the promise I made to her, which I've always kept. The one, perfect day we had on Morobishi Avenue...Ah, yes, that's three blocks down where you're headed, and to the right."

Maya, moved nearly to tears by the man's delivery, nodded her head. "*Sniff* Thank you," she said softly, before quickly running back out, hopping into the car, and gunning it towards the direction the man had described. The music resumed as she sped off.

Eventually, the car ran out of gas and slowed to a stop next to the curb, much to Maya's frustration as she hit the steering wheel. She soon found herself running the rest of the way, until she reached a white building with a tall steeple that had a cross on the very tip. She tried the front doors, only to discover they were locked. She then spotted a set of stairs leading up to a door that opened to a second-story walkway overlooking the chapel. The organ was playing when Maya looked down through the glass, just as the groom lifted the bride's veil and leaned in for a kiss.

"Oh, Jesus, God, NO..." Maya groaned, before she started banging on the glass. "Ritsuko! Ritsuko! Ritsuko...!"

The wedding guests, as well as the bride, groom, and priest, turned and looked up at Maya with confused looks on their faces. It was upon seeing the faces of the bride and groom in particular that made Maya stop.

"OH! Uh, um, hi there..." she said, sheepish and embarrassed as she gave a small, polite wave. "(God, how awkward...) Heh-heh, sorry, wrong wedding!" She then gave a polite bow as she turned to leave. "Good luck to you both! Enjoy the honeymoon!" With that, she dashed out and down the stairs outside. Once on level ground, she looked at her surroundings, and then gave herself a facepalm when she noticed she'd actually run into the Second United Church. She then saw the First United across the street, ran to it, and wound up repeating her entry from a few minutes ago.

Again, she found herself on the second story hallway overlooking the chapel, just as the organ started to play, and just as the groom-who for some reason was her top commanding officer, Gendo Ikari-lifted the veil off of the bride, who sure enough was Ritsuko Akagi.

"Oh, Jesus, God, NO..." Maya groaned, before she started banging on the glass again. "Ritsuko! Ritsuko! Ritsuko...!"

No surprise, she wound up getting the attention of the entire wedding party. Ritsuko, in particular, was shocked to see Maya, as she stepped away from the altar, as if she wanted a closer look. While Maya kept crying her name out, Ritsuko looked around, and sure enough, she saw a furious Gendo mouth the words 'That little-!'. Ritsuko, knowing full well the feeling behind that, faced the young woman banging on the glass.

"Maya-?!"

**POOF!**

"Maya? Maya, wake up!"

Maya jumped with a start from her console, as she turned and looked up at who'd woken her. Ritsuko's hand was on her shoulder, so it didn't take long for her to realize that it was her sempai-and her secret crush-was the one who did the deed.

"Uh, sempai?" Maya asked as she rubbed her eyes. "What happened? Was I...?"

"It's all right, Maya," Ritsuko replied. "I've had you burning the midnight oil a lot lately, so something told me this might happen. I think it's about time you called it a day."

"Um, sure, sempai," Maya said as she got up from her chair and stretched a bit. She then soon made her way to the door to the lab...

"Oh, and Maya?" Ritsuko asked.

Maya turned around. "Yes, sempai?"

"Maybe you should lay off the Comedy Central reruns for a while," the bottle blonde suggested.

Maya blushed on hearing that, as she then recalled her telling Ritsuko and the others about her catching Wayne's World 2 on TV the night before.

"Heh heh, good idea," the brunette said as she exited the lab.

END.

**Author's Note(s)**

Excellent, no?