Chapter one

Just Remember, Death is not the End.


This... Is a horrid predicament.

I should be horrified, pissed off, and depressed... Yet all I can muster up is mild discomfort. And not even a mental discomfort, which just makes things even weirder. It feels like the tamest migraine ever. Everything just feels distinctly WRONG.

Then again, I shouldn't worry about it, since I am a Nobody.

And the worst part was I know exactly how I died. It was because that tyrant decided he was going to try practical testing with his nukes. And even then he was probably able to get away with just paying a fine. I would say I hope his wallets were bled dry, but even hope escapes me.

At the very least, the Kingdom Hearts is paying it forward with this.

[welcome, user, to the prototype version of the Shopkeep System! As you should know, this lets you become the shopkeeper from links awakening, but on steroids! Now, normally, we would just toss you to the wind to sort things out for yourself... But, considering your less than enviable situation, I decided to set you up a care package along with the tutorial! Have fun, and make America look inadequate with your capitalism!]

Well. It has enthusiasm. Either way, if I recall correctly, Nobodies had the ability to shadow-walk to Worlds.

[for thinking ahead and having already studied your race, you gained +2 wisdom and +1 intelligence!]

Well... I guess it WAS a bit much to ask to not need to kill to get materials.


My voice was a raspy, drawling thing. Being unable to speak for hell knows how long can do that to a man.


[important persons]






Ah. Words, ambushing my face. Neat.



Special abilities you gain from expertise at jobs & trades, skill proficiencies, just leveling up, your race, and other assorted things.

Nonexistent being: You are a Nobody. And a nobody.

Cannot be manipulated through the use of anything but the cunning of another person.

+12% natural resistance to light & dark damage & cost to light & dark based skills.

Less likely to suffer from ailments, but pure healing spells heal less.

Cannot feel emotion; can only replicate it. Reputation gain is halved. Can be removed as you progress.

Not my first rodeo:

Knowledge of the Macroverse and Kingdom Hearts


Child of Twilight:

gain +10 accuracy & pierce for light & dark based skills.


Hm... well then, perhaps it is time to enter the great existence of fucking grimdark blobs.



Special skills you can perform both in and out of battle; some only having reasonable uses in one or the other.


Level: 1

You know what this does.

Cost: 0mp


Level: χ

Abbreviation of "Corridor of Darkness". What will, inevitably, become your main method of travel. 0% chance of corruption to you at this level; can entirely negate the corruptive effects on others by simply desiring them to not corrupt. Others with a similar level are also immune.

Cost: 0mp

Note: you can have multiple C.o.D.s open at once. Do with this knowledge what you will.


With an appropriate mental command ("RIP AND TEAR THE FABRIC OF REALITY UNTIL OUR DUTY IS DONE"), a hole of slightly-less-darker Darkness was opened before my eyes.

Welp. Time to wake up and smell the apocalypses.