159Harry Potter, Minor God.
When the post for a minor godhood fell vacant, it was decided by the council of gods to hold a lottery to fill the post. As luck would have it, the god of Lottery pronounced the victor to be Harry Potter, an eleven-year-old wizard. So begins the story of Harry Potter, god of… glue?
Disclaimer 1: I do not own Harry Potter.
Disclaimer 2: I do not claim originality for this idea. I vaguely remember seeing similar ideas but don't remember the exact fanfic(s). The plot, however, is my own (hopefully).
Chapter 1.
Ascension to godhood
"I'm sorry, could you repeat that?" Harry eyed the old man in front of him in shock and some apprehension. A few hours ago, a giant of a man arrived to let him know of his heritage as a wizard. Now, an older man in a travelling cloak and a round hat stood before him, telling him something that sounded even more preposterous.
"I am Hermes, Herald of gods, and He who acts as Their Messenger." The old man repeated. "Borrowing the style of the gentleman who came before me, I repeat. 'Yer a god, Harry!' "
"I'm sorry." Harry blabbered, feeling a vague sense of Déjà vu. "There must be some mistake. I can't be … a god?" He felt positively ridiculous even pronouncing the word.
"The post of a minor god fell vacant, and a lottery was conducted to decide who fills the role. The god of lotteries ruled that you, of the nine hundred and ninety-nine billion eligible souls in this cosmos, are selected for this job."
"A lottery? God of lotteries?" Harry looked at the old man disbelievingly. This seemed like some poorly thought-out prank. Sure, he accepted his magic faster. In that case, however, he had remembered various instances in which he demonstrated some unbelievable and illogical feats which had no other plausible explanation.
"You would do well to dwell less on human logic, Harry, for that is not the path in which a wizard or indeed a god travels." The man who identified himself as Hermes said. "There are countless gods in this world, for things as small as lotteries and as large as creation. There may be multiple gods with the same role and some exceptional gods with multiple roles. There is a god for lotteries, a god for magic, a god for chocolates, or a god for glue. There's a god for almost anything imaginable."
Harry found the last one funny. "A god for glue?" He barely restrained his laughter. "Who is that?"
"You are," Hermes told him in utmost seriousness. "For it is that post that fell vacant due to the elevation, or promotion, as humans put it, of the god who handled that role."
Harry stared at Hermes. Hermes stared back.
Hermes left after an hour-long session on what it meant to be a god and the rules he had to follow as one. Although initially sceptical, Harry was convinced of the existence of gods when Hermes pointed out that the time around them had stopped completely thanks to the actions of the god of time. Hermes explained that this was one of the ways in which they (the Divine Order of gods) convinced newly appointed gods of their existence.
Harry was convinced of his new godly powers after Hermes explained to him how they worked. In its simplest form, he could make objects stick or unstick at will. He found out to his shock that it actually worked when he placed a chair on the ceiling, and it stayed there. He wasn't the god of just glue, per se, but more precisely of sticking and unsticking.
Hermes then told him of the rules he had to follow as a minor god.
1. His divine power depends on the number of souls who believe in his existence and ability. Currently, that included the council of gods, which numbered in a few hundreds, and a few humans who firmly believed that things stuck together by glue as an act of a god.
2. He may exercise his powers in the presence of others as long as he doesn't let others know that he is the cause of it.
3. He may not intentionally reveal his divinity to a non-divine exitance, i.e., a non-god.
4. He may not use his powers for evil purposes.
5. As a minor god, his powers are restricted to his immediate surroundings or places he has been to. He has to be present in a location to exercise his control there.
Harry was also given some perks of being a god. Although he wasn't technically immortal as a minor god, he was less likely to die as long as he had enough believers. He would be less susceptible to mortal wounds and, overall, less vulnerable to diseases et cetera et cetera. He would be able to travel to any location on Earth with the help of a Portal provided by Hermes. He would be capable of contacting telepathically gods that he had already met.
He also learned the hierarchies of godhood. He was a Minor God, above which was a Major God. Then came Minor Deity, and then Major Deity. Hermes and the other well-known gods were Major Deities. Hermes also mentioned a class above this, called Supreme Deity, but that knowledge was restricted to deities alone.
Harry's head was spinning with the overload of information as he went to bed that night. His heart thundered when he thought about what he had to do tomorrow. He was invited to Olympus to visit the Olympians, who were part of the Council of Gods.
After an unpleasant breakfast at the Dursley household the next morning, Harry decided to explore the aspects of his newly bestowed godhood. First, he needed to get out of the house.
Closing his eyes, he remembered what Hermes had told him about divine transport.
'Hermes, god of travel, I beseech thee to provide me a path to Hogwarts.'
Harry suddenly felt light emanating from in front of him and opened his eyes. A tear had appeared in space, light pouring from it like a window. It opened and widened, now big enough for him to pass through. On the other side, he could see a forest. Gathering his courage, he stepped through the rift to the other side.
Harry wandered around what was called the Forbidden Forest, which was located close to Hogwarts. Hermes had elected to drop him here rather than in the middle of Hogwarts as the staff would notice his sudden appearance in the castle. He met strange creatures, half-horse, half-man, upon his arrival. They called themselves Centaurs, and they seemed to know of his newfound promotion. They were reverent and extremely accomodating.
As he caught the first glimpse of Hogwarts, Harry's breath caught in his throat. To call it majestic would be an understatement. He could feel the power concentrated around the place. Unfortunately, he could go no further without risking detection from the castle wards. He would have to wait for the term to start to explore the castle, so he decided to head towards his next destination.
'Hermes, god of travel, I beseech thee to provide me a path to Olympus.'
Harry stepped out of the portal and was frozen in place by what he saw. He found himself standing in a carpet woven with threads of gold and silver. The carpet extended to a gigantic door made out of some blueish metal and paved with every sort of jewel imaginable. The door paled compared to the structure it opened to, for it was a palace that made Hogwarts seem like a chicken shed.
He took slow, trembling steps towards the door and eventually reached the two Titan-sized guards. The guards were tall enough to reach half the height of the doorway. For comparison, Harry was sure he could fit through its keyhole.
One of the titans glanced down, noting his arrival.
"Harry Potter, god of… glue?" The titan confirmed.
Harry felt half relieved in hearing the confirmation. "Yes." He said as confidently as possible.
"You may enter."
"Thank you," Harry said politely. The guards swung open the door, and Harry walked inside as fast as his legs would carry him.
He found that the rooms did not seem as big as the doors seemed to indicate, or he would have been walking for hours to get to wherever he was supposed to. Looking back at the door, Harry was astonished to find that it now looked much smaller. Did it shrink, or did he become bigger?
"Oh, hello. New here?" Harry heard a clear feminine voice from his right. He whipped his head around to see the most enchanting woman he had laid eyes upon. He was not altogether ashamed to admit that he gaped like a fish when he saw her.
After a minute of him staring at her and the woman looking at him with growing amusement, Harry forced himself to speak.
"I'm…" He swallowed to hide his cracking voice. "Harry. Harry Potter."
"God of glue. Yes, you were newly chosen, weren't you?" She asked kindly. "I am Aphrodite." She smiled.
Harry felt completely stupid to have his position said aloud by the woman he now recognized as Aphrodite, one of the major deities and an Olympian to boot.
"All godhoods are important, do not devalue yourself," Aphrodite said as if reading his thoughts.
Harry felt like kicking himself when he realized she could probably read minds. He felt a jolt of horror when he realized she probably knew what he thought of when he first saw her.
Aphrodite smiled in amusement again. "That is quite common, I assure you." She stepped closer to him and grabbed his hand. "Allow me to escort you to the others."
Harry's mind was numb from the moment Aphrodite held his hand. He was sure she was entirely aware of her effect on him from the playful look she had in her eyes. Harry was mentally kicking himself to move, but his body did not respond at all. His heart rate was reaching new records, but he felt like he had turned into a statue.
"Shall we go?" she giggled and pulled his hand. Somehow, miraculously, Harry began to follow.
Aphrodite gave him a small tour of Olympus and even showed him a room which read `Office of Harry Potter, god of matters that concern the sticking and unsticking of substances'. He was floored by the fact that he would have an office (?!) in Olympus. He was immensely thankful that the name plaque designated him by his official title and not his nickname, the god of glue. Aphrodite told him that his duties included responding to prayers and any significant disturbances in the natural order of things. Since he was a minor deity, his workload was low.
Finally, he reached a room that Aphrodite called the Council Room. Stepping in, Harry saw that the room had a seat in the centre, where he was asked to sit. In front of his chair was a semicircular table, where four other gods were seated. Aphrodite released his hand and, much to his embarrassment, kissed him on the cheek. She then joined her brethren on the other side of the table.
Hermes cleared his throat. "I believe introductions are in order." He pointed to the gods that he didn't recognize. "Hestia, Zeus and Hades." He listed, pointing to each one. Of course, their names sufficed as they scarcely needed any other introduction.
Zeus eyed Harry with a thoughtful look. "One of the youngest we've had." He muttered. "Hope you won't disappoint us, Harry Potter."
Harry swallowed. "No, sir. I will do my best."
Zeus' lips curved slightly upwards to show the barest hint of a smile. "Dismissed, then. All the best." He muttered and laid back disinterestedly. "Aphrodite, you seem to have taken a liking to him. Show him the ropes."
"Of course." Aphrodite smiled and guided Harry out of the room. She waited a few moments outside, and Hestia and Hades emerged as well.
Hestia walked forward and gave Harry a warm hug. "Welcome, Harry, to our little family. I'm sorry that you had to go through so much in eleven short years." Harry could hear genuine sadness in her voice, and her eyes were teary. "Come to me if you ever need anything, dear." She released her embrace and turned to her brother. "Hades, remember what I told you."
Hades gave a noncommittal grunt. Hestia gave him a stern look, and he sighed in resignation. With a last watery smile to Harry, Hestia bade him farewell. Harry felt an odd mix of comfort and confusion at the goddess' actions.
"I can permit a short visit to see your parents," Hades muttered, shocking Harry. "An hour in human time is what I can permit at most, that too on Hestia's compulsion. Meet me in my office three days from now." He said, slowly dissolving to smoke by the end of it.
"I can… see my parents?" Harry turned to Aphrodite, his voice cracking with hope.
"Hestia asked Hades to allow it. This is highly unusual, Harry. So do make most of it." She confirmed with a smile.
Ascension to godhood did not compare to the joy and elation Harry felt now.
Harry settled in his new office in Olympus, still filled with wonder. Aphrodite had just left after guiding him back there. She promised to lend him an assistant to help him with his duties until he could find someone suitable for himself.
Harry looked at his table, feeling like his life couldn't get any stranger. In front of him was a computer, of all things, provided to him by the god of technology. Accompanying it was a mobile phone. Aphrodite assured him that they had all the latest features and was aeons ahead of any human tech.
A sharp knock jolted Harry out of his reverie. "Come in!"
A young woman entered the room, smiling in a way that made his heart flutter. This was Aphrodite's assistant, no doubt, whom she had promised to send to assist him.
"Hello, boss. Call me Peitho." She said, placing her hands on the table and leaning forward with a predatory smile.
Definitely one of Aphrodite's. Harry concluded, putting on a partial resistance to her charm and matching her smile with his own. After spending over an hour in Aphrodite's presence, he was proud to say he could function at more than fifty per cent brain capacity in front of captivating women. That was much better than his previous zero per cent brain dead state. In his defence, that was Aphrodite.
"Hello. Thank you so much for helping me." He was aware that she probably outranked him and couldn't treat her as a mere assistant.
Peitho walked around the table and seated herself in his chair's armrest. Bending to bring her mouth close to his ear, she whispered. "My pleasure, boss."
Harry's spine tingled, and blood rushed to his cheeks. His brain capacity had gone down to twenty per cent.
"J-just call me Harry." He stuttered. "What may I call you?" He asked in a vain attempt at formality.
"Whatever you like, Harry." She grinned. "Whatever you like."
"Umm…" I really hope she isn't one of those deities that can read minds.
"Sorry to disappoint you," Peitho smirked. Seeing Harry turn red, she laughed and pinched his cheek. "So cute. We should gift divinity to young folk more often. Your reactions are so precious."
"Umm… So what do I have to do?"
"Lucky you, this is all you have to address for now." She handed him a single sheet of paper. As soon as Harry touched it, he heard a faint voice inside his head, undoubtedly of a child.
"Umm… god of glue, whoever you are, please fix my mom's vase. I broke it, and it's her favourite one!" She sounded close to tears, and he could hear the sincerity of her thoughts.
"To approve, just sanction it with your mind. The glue that was used will do the rest." Peitho instructed.
Harry immediately focused his thoughts, and he could see the broken vase held in a child's hand. It was covered with glue that would normally be used to stick papers together. He focused his attention on the vase, wanting the vase repaired more than anything else. In a moment, the glue vanished and the vase mended as if it was never broken. Harry could feel the excitement and wonder coming from the child, and he couldn't help but smile himself.
"Congratulations. You have a devout follower now." Peitho chuckled. "This will be your main job. As your followers increase, so will your workload. But luckily for you, so will your abilities."
"Thank you." He said earnestly, grateful that a busy goddess had taken her time to explain this to him.
"You're welcome, Harry." Peitho smiled. "You can contact Aphrodite or me any time with telepathy. I will be available to answer any doubts you may have. Since Aphrodite is much busier than me, I recommend you contact me for small matters. But do keep in touch with her too!"
"Okay." Harry nodded. "Um… What happens to Hogwarts? Or the Dursleys?" Since Peitho could read minds, she would understand exactly what he meant.
"You may attend Hogwarts if you wish. In fact, I recommend it. If not anything else, you can try to increase your followers there." She chuckled. "You may complete your mortal life as you see fit, or you may just stay here with us. You are free to choose. Regarding the Dursleys," she curled her lips with distaste. "We can make it so that they forget your existence. Others will forget where you live, even those who placed you there. Olympus can be your home from now."
Harry whooped with joy. At that moment, the protections around Number four, Private Drive, shattered as Harry no longer considered it his home. It was inconsequential, however, as everyone who knew about his existence forgot where he lived. That thought would not cross their minds unless Harry spoke about it specifically, thanks to the god of memory.
And if the Dursleys suffered from a nasty streak of bad luck from that day forth, it was their past actions that carried the blame. The gods of luck, misery or wealth would swear they had nothing to do with it, and Aphrodite would swear she didn't ask them any particular favours that day.