Because WandaVision has left us all emotionally damaged, I thought that I would put my own spin on it. Remember the end of Spiderman: Far from Home? Where did Peter go to hide, I wonder?Obviously, Spoilers for all episodes of WandaVision. Also minor Spoilers for Spiderman FFH. Enjoy!
Peter was sitting on his couch, reading a book when an unfamiliar song rang out from outside.
"A newlywed couple just came to town…."
Peter rolled his eyes. He didn't usually judge people, but his biggest pet peeve was when people rolled down their car windows to blast their odd music to everyone in a 15 mile radius.
Despite that, he was intrigued about who it could be, so he stepped over to the window and peeked through the blinds just in time to see a nice car stroll down the road in front of him.
There were 2 people in the car, a man and a woman. The woman was wearing a beautiful wedding dress, and the man had a hat covering his face. Not a very good driving tactic, Peter decided.
He watched as the pair pulled into the driveway next to his and jumped out of the car. Peter looked over at the For Sale sign and realized that they had just moved in. What he didn't see was the sudden change in the sign, from available to sold.
The man picked up the woman bridal style and carried her into the house. Peter thought that he saw the woman fall on the porch at some point, but he wasn't really paying attention.
It would be good to finally have some normal neighbors around here, Peter thought. Not that Agnes wasn't normal, but she was a bit odd. She had a weird laugh.
Peter didn't really pay attention to the new neighbors until the next night. Around 6, he decided to take his nightly walk around the back roads. The route was the same every day - walk around the houses on his street until he got to the town square, and slowly circle back to his house. He always made sure to avoid Ellis Avenue for some reason. There was nothing wrong with it, but Peter just had a feeling that he shouldn't go there.
About 5 minutes into his stroll, he happened to walk past the new neighbors' house. He could hear some commotion going on inside, and he furrowed his brow. Hopefully they wouldn't be this noisy every night.
Suddenly, an object came hurling from the kitchen window and slammed into Peter's leg. "Ouch! What the hell?" Peter hissed, holding his injured leg. When the pain became bearable, he bent down and picked up the object. It was a friggin lobster.
Peter almost laughed at the obscurity of it. Either his new neighbors hated lobster, or they just did a terrible job at cooking it and decided to throw it out, literally.
Peter suddenly got the feeling that he should end his walk early and go to bed. Before he could comprehend it, his feet were moving him inside the house.
He slipped into bed 15 minutes later, without a care in the world. It was almost as if there wasn't anything to care about at all.
The wind was terrible that night. The trees were banging on the windows, and it woke Peter up on several occasions. He was planning on waking up early, anyway, because he had to prepare for the annual Westview talent show. "For the children," Peter chuckled. Dottie was very hung up on that.
Despite stereotypes that men couldn't be dancers, Peter loved to dance. He was more flexible than anyone that he knew. He wondered if he got it from his parents.
His parents. Who were his parents?
He shrugged off the thought and slipped on his hand pads. His hands weren't injured or anything, but he felt happy when he wore them. Almost like he had a purpose.
That was funny. Having a purpose? What an absurd thought.
For the next hour, he practiced his routine for the talent show. He wasn't too worried about the competition until he saw Agnes walking with her bunny. Seniòr Scratchy loved the stage. Peter would have to bump it up.
Finally, it was time for the show. Peter skipped over to the town square and went over to set up his equipment behind the stage. There, he saw a lady with a clipboard, who was directing everyone to their designated prop areas.
"Hey," Peter waved. "Where can I put my stuff?"
"Hi!" The lady smiled. "You can put your props over there. Can I have a name for the program?"
Peter thought for a moment. Never could he recall having a last name.
"Um, it's just Peter." He told the lady nervously.
"Alright," the lady furrowed her brow as she scribbled his name on her clipboard. "Nice to meet you, Peter. I'm Geraldine." She held up her hand for him to shake, which Peter did.
"Nice to meet you. Are you performing today?"
"Oh, heavens no. I'm just a supervisor. Dottie's orders." Geraldine rolled her eyes at the mention of Dottie.
Peter chuckled. "She does take this very seriously."
"Maybe a little too seriously." Geraldine muttered. "Why don't you sit in the audience until it's your turn to perform? I'll announce you when it's time."
"Alright. Thank you!" Peter bid his farewells and took his seat in the audience, next to Agnes.
"Hi, Peter! How are you this fine day?" Agnes asked in her usual chipper voice.
"I'm doing well, thank you Agnes. How about you?"
"Oh, I'm just so excited to see the show! Seniòr Scratchy is performing with Wanda."
"Why, your neighbor, silly! She just moved in a couple of days ago. She also has a husband, Vision. He's a lot better looking than Ralph, I'll tell you that!" Agnes laughed.
Peter smiled. It was about time he knew the names of the new residents.
"Oh, the show is starting!" Agnes squealed and turned to Geraldine, who was starting the show.
In Peter's eyes, he'd say that the show went very well. He had no idea that his neighbors were so talented. His performance went well, too. Agnes gave him a standing ovation. But then again, she's Agnes.
After a round of "For the children!", Dottie announced the names of the last performers, Wanda and Vision. Wanda came out first, wearing a beautiful leotard. After a moment of silence, Vision stumbled out.
"Hello Westview!" Vision slurred. "I am Glamour, and this is my assistant, Illusion!"
Agnes whispered something about being drunk.
"I am Glamour, and he is Illusion." Wanda corrected, giving her husband a look.
"Today, we are going to awe your dumbstruck little minds! And you are going to believe us, because the human mind is gullible and stupid. Flourish!" Vision bowed clumsily. "Behold!"
Then he started floating.
Everyone gasped, including Wanda for some reason. Suddenly Norm yelled, "Look, there's a rope!"
And sure enough, there was a rope holding Vision. Peter was slightly upset at Norm for ruining the trick, but he laughed when Wanda lowered the rope and Vision fell back on the stage.
Vision stood up slowly and stumbled over to the piano. "Flourish!" With one hand, he easily picked up the piano and moved it around the stage. Everyone gasped again and Vision set it back down.
Wanda briskly walked over and picked up the piano as well, but this time it was clear that the instrument was made of cardboard. "Whoops, you weren't supposed to see how we did that trick!" She smirked as everyone laughed.
"That was my grandmother's piano." Greg muttered.
Peter winced. Poor Greg.
Vision stepped down onto the grass and scanned the audience. "I would like to introduce you to my friend Flerb! Flerb, get up here!" He exclaimed, pointing at Herb.
"It's Herb," He whispered as he stood up.
"Pick a card, any card!" Illusion shouted a bit too loud. Herb grabbed one and examined it before putting back in the deck.
Vision closed his eyes and shuffled the cards. He grabbed a random one and held it up to the audience. "Is this your card?"
"No." Herb answered.
Vision frowned and grabbed another card. "Is this your card?"
And on and on it went. "Is this your card?" "No." Peter didn't know if Vision was failing on purpose, but it was funny nonetheless.
Vision reached the end of the deck and showed it to Herb. "Is this your card?"
"Yes!" Herb exclaimed.
"That's my card."
"Well pardon me, Herb, have it back!" Vision grumbled and thrust the card in Herbs hands before getting back on the stage.
"Flourish!" Vision bowed again, as if he hasn't just totally bombed the trick. Just then, Seniòr Scratchy bounced across the stage. Before Vision could grab him, Wanda him up and stroked his fur. "Let's leave the bunny out of this one, Shall we?"
Agnes beamed with pride.
Vision grabbed a top hat and turned to the audience. "Well, if I can't pull a bunny out of a hat, I'll just have to pull the hat out of me!" He thrust the hat into his side and to everyone's surprise, the hat went through him and came out the other side.
Everyone gasped and clapped until the curtains suddenly opened, revealing a series of mirrors. The audience laughed and accepted the trick as a fake.
"Is that how mirrors work?" Beverly asked.
"Shut up, Bev." Dottie hissed.
Wanda sighed and wheeled out a large box. Everyone oohed as Vision opened it. "Now behold, as I make my assistant Glamour, disappear!" He closed the box, with Wanda still standing next to him.
Wanda cleared her throat. "Uh, Vis?" Vision looked back at his wife and realized that he had messed up.
"What's in the box? What's in the box?" Someone started chanting, and soon everyone joined in. "What's in the box? What's in the box?"
The two performers looked at each other nervously and slowly opened the box to reveal a very surprised Geraldine.
Everyone shouted in surprise and applauded. The 3 on stage took a bow and rushed off stage.
That night, Peter was on the last chapter of his book, and he wanted to finish it before he went to bed. He heard a rustle outside, and opened the front door to investigate.
Right outside his house there was a man exiting the sewers. His face was covered by a large mask and there were bees surrounding him.
"What the hell?" Peter whispered.
That night, Peter was on the last chapter of his book, and he wanted to finish it before he went to bed. He ultimately decided that he was too tired, and switched off his lamp before heading to bed.
The next morning was sunny and bright, so naturally Peter decided to stay inside and bake. He didn't know what for, but it felt like the right thing to do.
Right after he took his cupcakes out of the oven, there was a pop and the power went out. Peter cursed and set the treats on the counter. He went outside to find that the entire street had no power. Peter shrugged. Might as well get some yard work done.
A couple of minutes later, the power came back on and Peter went back inside. He frosted the cupcakes and was about to bag them when water came pouring down and soaked his treats as well as himself. He looked up to see if there was a hole in the roof, but everything was intact. What was happening?
Soon the mysterious rain stopped and Peter ran into the living room to find his furniture soaked to the core. Cripes. He tried to dry it with a fan, but he soon gave up and went outside to dry off. There he found Agnes and Herb talking with Vision, and he went over to socialize.
Before he could reach them, he picked up some of their conversation. Peter knew that he had excellent hearing, but this was just weird. They were probably just talking loud, he decided.
No home.What do you mean she has no home?Well, she came here….she came here because.. because we're all...Because we're all what?Um, she came here because we're all-Don't!
Agnes looked up at Herb with a pleading look in his eyes. After a minute, Agnes smiled and looked back at a very confused Vision.
Well, I better go! This macarde isn't going to stitch itself!
She rang the bell on her cart and winked overdramatically. She walked cheerfully in Peter's direction.
"Afternoon, neighbor!" She waved as she passed him.
Peter looked back at the other 2, but Vision was walking inside and Herb was back to cutting his bushes. Well, so much for socializing.
I was originally planning on this being a One- shot, but I just had so much that I wanted to put in, so I'm going to split it up into 4 or 5 chapters because I only got through the first 3 episodes this chapter. I hope you enjoyed!