13Forget Forever
Disclaimed - I do not own anything~ maybe just the story concept... but eh. It's a clichéd storyline.
I know it's another new story! But I am working on TEOtH. Just a few things I need to confirm in the ending before releasing the next chapter. But it will be finished!
Otherwise, I hope you enjoy this new story. It's a short story. So don't expect a lot of chapters, or a lot of story content, per-say.
The summary is pretty straight forward. it will be a HEA for those who are die hard fans for S/D pairing. Small spoiler. I'm sorry.
Chapter 1
'Dear Diary,
I learned today that ma and pa were high school sweethearts. Meaning they have been together for YEARS! I hope one day I can be with someone forever too. They are so happy and are the best of friends. I'm sure that is what true love is.
Prey for me, that one day I have that too.
Always lots of love, Bunny xo'
A light laugh was heard as pages rustled to another page.
'Dear Diary,
Today a boy knocked me down. I confronted him and said that he doesn't need to be mean if he likes me. He laughed and pushed me over again.
I think parents were wrong when they said boys tease the girls they like… I'm kind of thankful, because I don't think papa would ever push mama down. So, I'm glad I won't love someone like that. But considering all the other boys just watched and laughed, how will I ever know if a boy like me, little lone loves me?
I'm a bit worried for my future now.
… Bunny xo'
More rustling of paper was heard in the stale place as pages of a book flicked over.
'Dear Diary,
I'm shattered. Love isn't forever?
I thought love conquered all and prevailed over everything?
Mina is to stay with us for a week. Ma said Aunty is separating from uncle. A divorce? I was crying when mum told me that love doesn't always last. That love isn't always strong enough to keep two people together.
What am I to believe now? I worry Mina is just as confused as I am. The self-proclaimed goddess of love.
Hopefully I can grasp a better understanding of this concept. Ma tells me not to worry, and Aunty says there is plenty of fish in the sea… maybe I'm too young to understand what they mean right now?
I hope everything I have believed before now was not in vain. I hope Aunty finds happiness again. At least that is what I am to believe by her comment?
Love Bunny xo'
'Dear Diary,
Great news! Mina still believes in love and has reassured me that there are different levels of love. My faith is renewed. I was worried my life would not be filled with love and happy memories.
I'm also really happy that love isn't just between a man and woman, like ma and pa. But also, between friends and family. I'm told when we get married they become our new family. So, it makes sense. Although we never marry our friends, they are those we share happy memories with, and can consider as family too.
I hope it's not the case, but even if I never meet my prince, I will always have love in my life. And that's enough for me right now while I try to understand this new concept.
To a renewed faith!
Love Bunny xo'
A silent tear slithered off her face with a small thud onto the paper of the page she read. With a thud the book was closed. Placing it to her left, on the pile of other journals she had flicked through, she grabbed the next item in the box to her right. It was a baby pink sketch book. A smile graced her lips as she remembered what this book held.
Opening to a few pages in she slid her hands over the cut-out magazines of wedding dresses. More pages in were pictures of 'true love' destinations. A laugh escaped her lips as more tears slid down her face. The innocent memories of a child with such high hopes for love. Anyone who had met her now would never believe she was capable of having such romantic and unrealistic thoughts and hopes. But these precious books preserved the innocent memories of a child. The innocents of the world and men.
Placing the book down she wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. Taking a deep breath, she grabbed for another journal out of the box.
'Dear Diary,
As I get older, I'm struggling to believe there is a special someone for me. It seems like love is fleeting and everyone is dating… well everyone. Is experience really more important than finding that slow burning romance? Maybe I will be lonely my whole life. The girls laugh at me and call me a spinster… surely not? I just have a different ideology on the topic then everyone else it seems.
Should I forgo my ideals and just jump on this 'dating' bandwagon? Ma says it's just my age. But I don't know. Maybe I'll see what next year brings. For now, I will hold these pains to myself and continue to hope and pray.
Maybe Mina and my friends are right, teenage boys are just stupid! I'm to good for them anyway.
Hopping mad, Bunny xo'
'Dear Diary,
Why does everyone keep telling me to grow up? Is love really such a bad thing to dream about? Is it really such a bad notion to dream about, to want a happy future?
So many people are telling me love is overrated, hard to come by, and never lasts. Why is there so much hurt and pain in the world when it's about love? Is love really painful?
But why is it depicted as such a beautiful and sweet thing? Even Hollywood makes it this everlasting thing in movies. Love at first sight, love prevails all… what am I to believe. I'm back to questioning everything again. Is it even worth it if it makes people so unhappy?
But I look at ma and pa and they are still together and so happy. They are always holding each other and laughing. It's beautiful.
I'm sorry I can't write much right now. I'm too confused and sad.
Until next time diary.
Confused Bunny xo'
Another book added to pile. Why she persisted to write over the years, little lone keep the damn things after packing and leaving them in the attic many years ago. She wrote right up until adulthood… her hands stopped as she noticed the book she was now pulling from the box. A slight tremble was evident as a sharp intake of breath rocked her body. It felt like forever before she decided to flick through the pages. Anticipation and fear as her breath hitched from the inevitable.
'Dear Diary,
I think I have finally met my prince charming! He is real. After all these years of questioning… he presented himself. And oh boy he looks just like a prince too. And the crazy part is that he is interested in me! Me! Of all people.
After years of being teased and loveless, my time as finally come.
Maybe finally I can have a normal romance and enjoy the spoils of true love?
Here to hoping towards a better future diary.
Princess Bunny xo'
'Dear Diary,
He treats me like a REAL princess! I'm on cloud 9 and I cannot be happier.
Even my friends are smitten by him and so happy for me. I've potentially even made Raye jealous! Given how often her and Lita date. One day they might meet the perfect one for them too.
I cannot wait to introduce him to my parents. I'm so excited. It all feels so fast, but I know he is 100% for me. I'm just so happy I want to jump into the sky and bounce off the clouds. How can someone so charming, handsome and attentive be all mine? His sweet words of reassurance and love… maybe this is what forever feels like? I hope I always feel like this.
The happiest Bunny xo'
'Dear Diary,
My parents absolutely LOVE HIM!
I was afraid when he came to dinner and pa said he knew him. But it all worked out.
Like fate. We met and fell in love regardless of knowing everything about each other.
Turns out, he is from a very affluent family himself and has been working for my pa for a while now. What are the chances? Crazy right? No. FATE! 3
If this isn't fate, I don't know what is! Everything just seems so crazy and unbelievable right now.
The blushing love bunny xo'
'Dear Diary,
He has proposed! And boy you should see the size of the rock! Everyone is obviously envious of me. We even made the papers! I'm not a massive socialite, but his family does draw attention. I'm just thankful it was a nice picture taken. I just hope this rollercoaster ride of love and happiness never ends.
To see the look on everyone's faces I went to school with, telling me love wasn't real, and I'd never find love, would be priceless. Well look at me know! Jokes on them. I found what I said I would. It's real, and it lives, and its mine! All mine. So gloriously mine.
I think I will have a very happy and love filled life, just like ma and pa. Everyone loves him, and he makes me feel on top of the world. Everything I have ever wanted.
He is such a gentleman and takes note of everything for me. He even calls me princess. Can you believe?
Soon I will be his wife. And I should start on the next stage of my life.
I feel this might be one of the last entries.
As my husband and best friend, I will share all my thoughts with him, and I shouldn't have any more need for you diary.
But please rest assure, you have always been there for me and helped sort my worries. For that I will forever be grateful and thankful. Who know, maybe one day I might find time to continue this journaling?
I will forever be grateful to the advice on these pages you have given me. Helping me share my thoughts and express my worries. Life will never be the same again after I am married. I'm so excited and so ready for this next stage in my life.
Forever yours Diary. Bunny xo'
A loud thud echoed the room as the book was thrust into the air towards a wall. By now tears had freely slid down her cheeks.
Coming here was to try and console her about her life, to try and make things right and see the light. But being here only offered her insight into how far from her dream she had come. The thoughts that lingered in the back of her mind started to come forward into the light.
Love was a silly notion. Love was horrid. Love was evil and vile. Love was not what she thought it was. How could her parents have something so different to what she had? Where did things go wrong? What was it she failed to see? Why was her life like this now?
Her resolve was complete now. The silly notion of finding love and living forever as a happy bride and housewife was wiped from her mind as she pulled her phone from her pocket and dialled someone she recently reconnected with. She was seeking confirmation from her friends about what happened to her life. How things got to where they got. And this friend happened to now be a lawyer. So, she requested some advice for her situation upon hearing some of the things she had to share.
Reconnecting with her friends and family was the best thing she could have done. It was not for that, she potentially would have been stuck in a web of lies and deceit, pretending to be something she wasn't, pretending to believe in something that did not exist in her life anymore.
"Hey Sere, what's up with the late-night call?" Came a chirping voice over the phone, "everything alright?" she quickly added after hearing a sniffle.
"Raye," she started, "I thought about what you said, and you're right," a broken sob came through the receiver.
"Oh sweety," her voice was low. "Do you want me to be your lawyer and proceed?"
After a moment of silence and sniffling, "Please Raye. I will leave tomorrow. I want to separate from this bastard as soon as possible!" she almost growled from the pain she now felt in her heart. Hate was so easy now that she understood love wasn't possible, or real anymore. In today's world, love was for the weak.
After witnessing the pain her aunty went through with her own divorce, and how everyone around her changed, she knew life wouldn't be the same. Everyone in her life would treat her differently, look at her differently. But this needed to happen. She needed to get out ASAP. She needed to be free again. She needed fresh air. She needed space – lots of it!
Reconnecting with her friends shed light on the whole situation. Googling her situation and contacting agencies also further consolidated the chocking feeling she had. After coming to her parents to go through her items, the lump in her throat made her painfully aware of her mistakes. Trusting the wrong person. Loving the wrong person. Believing in the wrong person.
She knew what she needed to do now. But she had to be smart. For her husband didn't love her. He was obsessed with her. And he had dragged her into his toxic world. Winding himself around every part of her life like vines. Now she had to slowly withdraw. Otherwise, the tension would cause him to strong hold her in this sad life. A life she couldn't do anymore. Not now that she was aware of what was happening.
Love was not forcing yourself to be happy. Love was not having to fake smiles in front of family and fake friends. Love was not reassuring yourself every night. Love was not demanded. Love was not supposed to be like this. She was positive of it.
For the first time in her life, she was positive about something. For the first time she would do something for herself. For the first time she seen a hopeful light towards a better life.
The words of Mina came into her mind, 'you can always love your friends too Serena, cause some friends are like sisters, like family.' And that was what she needed. She needed people who truly loved her for who she was in her life. And maybe one day she would know what true love was… but it wasn't something she would hold her breath for. Since now she knew, love was not forever!
Until next time~ which is soon cause most of this story is done. Just coming back to fill spaces and link scenes.
Please keep in mind the rating again - MA15+ with string themes. And lemons! LEMONS! Cause everyone needs an alternative to 50 Shades of Grey =P