267Disclaimer: I do not own Oregairu or any of its characters or content.
Bzzzzzzzzzz
Bzzzzzzzzzz
Oi, why the hell is my alarm going off on summer break?
Wait, that's just my phone. Who's texting me?
I let out a groan at having to wake up, before I reach for my phone laying on the desk. I quickly took a look at the time, which displayed 8:30 AM. It's summer break, why am I being woken up so early?!
My eyes moved down to the text message, which displayed the sender's name, 'Yukino Yukinoshita'. Ah, right, we were sort of a thing now. Who would have thought that I, a loner, would be with one of the most beautiful women in the school!
Still, why is she texting me at this time? I decided to read the message.
"Good morning, Hikigaya-kun."
...That's it? You seriously interrupted my sleep just to say good morning?! If I was a person who held grudges, you'd have seriously regretted your mistake! You should be thankful that I'm gracious enough to give you a second chance!
Oh well, it's Yukinoshita, so I'll forgive her. But again, why is she texting me this early? I decided to text her back about that.
"Oi, why did you text me so early?"
While I waited for a response, I forcefully dragged myself out of bed. I'd love to fall asleep again, but who knows what Yukinoshita would do if she decided to contact Komachi. While I sure do love my cute sister, it seriously lowers her Komachi Points whenever she forcefully wakes me up. Then again, just seeing her face negates the loss!
I walked over to my closet and put on a simple white t-shirt. Thanks to my excellent foresight, I made sure to check the weather before I went to sleep. And unless the forecast lied to me again, it would be really hot today.
...Maybe I should have checked my phone before putting on this shirt. Oh well, unless it's raining, I should be alright. On that note, I picked out a pair of shorts as well. Alright world, Hachiman is here to take on you!
...Grrk, what was that brain?! I thought I outgrew my chuunibyou phase years ago! Perhaps it's not as gone as I thought it was. This is terrible! Next thing I know, I'll be like Zaimokuza and be seen as creepy and disgusting!
I walked back to my bed, still cringing in my thoughts. Thankfully, it appeared that Yukinoshita had already responded. Wow, looks like someone was eagerly waiting for my response~. If I wasn't your partner, I'd maybe have gotten the wrong idea, you knowwww?
Anyways, what did she say?
"I was merely making sure that you wake up at a healthy time. After all, it is important that my partner be held up to the standards of my family. We cannot have you sleeping so late."
Oi oi, you consider 8:30 healthy?! And why do I feel like you were blushing while texting that?!
Jeez, this woman is going to be the death of me. But she's my partner, so I guess I don't mind that very much. Don't get the wrong idea though! That doesn't mean I want to die! I'm not like an Isekai protagonist who has the power to rewind time by dying!
Anyways, I guess I better respond to her.
"Seriously? I'm already a man of high quality! Any woman would be lucky to have a guy like me! But fine, I guess I'll go with it this once. Please don't do it at 8:30 in the morning. I still enjoy my sleep!"
Whew, I guess it's time to go down-
Right as I turned around and faced my bedroom door, I noticed that there was a small black box sticking out of the bottom of my bed. Huh? I didn't notice this earlier? Then again, one of my 108 skills only includes human observation, not object observation. What a shame.
I kneeled down and pulled out the box. It looked tightly sealed and difficult to open, which brought me some concerns. Why the hell was this under my bed? Don't tell me that this is a bomb waiting to blow?!
Ah wait, I'm not very important. Sure, I do have a partner and… plenty of acquaintances, but it's not like I have haters after me. Wait, that's a lie. There's some people who still hate me after the Sagami incident from the festival last year. That happened so long ago, I honestly forgot the finer details. The point is, some people still hate me. But enough to send a literal bomb to my house and plant it under my bed? Highly unlikely.
Thankfully, I had scissors in my room that I could use to open the box. I stood up again and grabbed them from my desk. Before I used them, I briefly hesitated. Why should I even open up the box anyways? Eh, whatever, it's probably something from my parents or Komachi. Actually scratch that, probably not my dad. He's a complete daughter-con and would never even think of giving me anything. Not even on my birthday.
Still, I was curious, so I used the scissors to open the box. Inside the box were… three DVD cases and a piece of paper? Now what is this?
First, I looked at the three cases. Strangely, there was nothing on the cover, just blank space. Confused, I decided to open the case only to see a blank disc sitting on the inside.
Oi oi, did someone just give me some adult films?! If you're going to do that, do it over the internet! Er, I mean don't do it at all! But seriously, what is this? Maybe the paper will explain it better, because that would be really awkward if I put this into our DVD player and got something Komachi should never ever see!
I placed the cases back into the box and pulled out the paper. I began to read it.
Hello Hachiman! Or, I should say Hikigaya, since we don't even know each other! Why does Japan put the surname first? I don't like it! And I refuse to use honorifics!
Anyways, I bet you're wondering what this mysterious black box is! Well, guess what? You won't find out in this note! Hahahaha!
My eyebrow ticked. Whoever wrote this, they sounded extremely annoying. Definitely not someone I'd like to interact with anytime soon. Still, there was more, so I continued to read.
So why did I give you this box? Let's just call it… entertainment. I'm going to give you three days for you to bring a list of people together. It'll be at the end of this note! Once you have everyone together, place the disc into a DVD player. You'll then see what the contents of the DVD has. But make sure you have everyone, or else it won't work!
And if you don't do anything by the time the three days are up… well, I'll do it myself! Actually, I probably should have done that anyways, but oh well! It's up to you Hikigaya!
Good luck!
Below the last line was a list of names that I recognized. The person who wrote this must be crazy! How do they expect me to contact all of those people?! I'm a loner, they should know that!
Also, I'm calling bullshit on the DVD business. How the hell would a disc know how many people are around? That's not how it works! Did you really think you could trick me with that kind of blatantly fake note?
Oh well, I do have these three DVDs though. I guess I should check what's actually on it. Maybe it's some anime that Komachi would enjoy. Only one way to find out.
I picked up the box and opened up my bedroom door, before walking down the steps onto the lower floor. Before I entered the living room though, I smelled the scent of something… good!
I walked in and saw Komachi in the kitchen, wearing an apron. A small smile appeared on my face at the sight. Her cooking would forever satisfy my tastes. Please don't leave me!
Oh wait, Yukinoshita's cooking is pretty good too, isn't it? But then what if we mixed both of their cooking? I bet it would be fantastic!
"Yo Komachi," I called out. At my words, she turned around with a surprised expression.
"Onii-chan! You're up earlier than usual! I didn't think Yuki-nee had that kind of effect on you!"
"Well, you aren't wrong." I said as I walked over to our tv. "She texted me right at 8:30, forcing me to lose my precious sleep." She's lucky that I'm willing to forgive her!
"Aw, how cute!" Komachi said that with a joyful expression. "When will you finally start calling her by her first name?"
My face suddenly flushed in embarrassment. "O-Oi, we're just taking things one step at a time!" It was very weird to call anyone aside from Komachi by their first name. One day, I hope to get to that point with Yukinoshita. But that day is not today.
"Whatever you say," Komachi giggled, before her attention moved to the black box in my hands. "Onii-chan, what's that?" She asked with a head tilt. Too cute!
"It's a black box," I said in a deadpan tone as I placed it on the floor. "For some reason, it was under my bed this morning when I woke up. Do you have any idea who put it there?"
"Nope! Maybe it was mom and dad? What was inside it anyways?"
I debated about what to say, before I shrugged. "There were these three DVD cases with nothing on it. I brought this with me to see what was on the disc." I gestured to the box. "I'd advise you to look away, just in case it's something your cute face should never see."
"...Gross." Oi, you shouldn't be saying that about your brother! "But Onii-chan is Onii-chan, so it's okay!" That's not much better! "So there was nothing about what was on the disc?"
I shook my head as I sat down and grabbed one of the cases. "Nope. There was a paper that came with it, but it barely explained anything." I opened up the case and grabbed the disc. "By the way, Komachi, is the food cooking fine?"
If this was a generic anime, then the female character would have panicked as she realized the food she worked so hard for had burnt into a crisp. But thankfully, we don't live in anime! Rather, Komachi confidently continued cooking.
"Of course, Onii-chan!" She said that with pride. "I'll never allow our meals to go burnt!"
I smiled as I placed the DVD into the player and closed it. "I have absolute confidence in your cooking skills! Ah, that must be worth a ton of Hachiman points!"
Komachi looked at me with a cheeky grin. "But the exchange rate to Komachi points is extremely low! You'll have to try a lot harder next time!"
I let out a loose laugh. No matter how long we have known each other for, I never got tired of our exchanges. Our sibling relationship was clearly the best in the world!
Ah, looks like the DVD player has loaded the disc. The TV was currently displaying a black screen with the [Done] icon hovering in the top right corner. I continued to sit on the floor, ready to eject the disc if it decided to play something nefarious.
After a few seconds of waiting, the speakers suddenly fired up. On the screen, several words suddenly appeared.
"Checking for sufficient people within radius…"
Eh? What the hell is this? Komachi also stopped cooking for a moment and looked at the tv in confusion.
"Hachiman Hikigaya: Detected. 1/16."
"Komachi Hikigaya: Detected. 2/16."
I stood up in shock, reading the names that now showed up on the screen. Why were our names being shown on here?!
"ERROR: Insufficient number of people detected. Forcing ejection of Disc…"
And just like that, the DVD player suddenly opened up with this disc inside. I stared at it for a few moments, not moving a muscle. My brain had sort of fried itself.
"...Onii-chan?" Komachi cautiously called out to me. "W-What was that?"
Thankfully, my brain had returned to me at this point. "Uh…" Well, sort of. "I-I have no clue. It's like the disc was… sentient." Ugh, saying that about a disc felt wrong. "I'm not going to play it again for the rest of my life."
I grabbed the disc and felt sorely tempted to snap it in half, but decided against it. Instead, I placed it back in its case and put it into the box. "I'm taking this back upstairs, Komachi. Don't touch it, ok?"
She only gave a slow nod in response. It was clear that she was nervous about the mysterious box of DVDs. And frankly, who wouldn't be?
Once back in my room, I dropped the box in a secluded corner of my closet. I was not going to touch that thing. Screw what the note said!
Bzzzz
Oh, looks like Yukinoshita finally responded back. I pulled out my phone to check what she said.
"I suppose you might be right to some extent. Perhaps I will give you some leeway."
Wow, that's not what I expected. Then again, she's completely different from the devil woman she was back when I first joined the service club. Which my self-esteem is thankful for. Before my thoughts continued however, another buzz came from the phone.
"8:35."
...Never mind, she's still the same.
As the days went by, the memory of the DVD cases faded away into the depths of my mind. What? I had more important things to worry about than a mysterious black box! Either way, I mostly forgot about it. I did occasionally remember that it existed, but I quickly got rid of those thoughts. I'd rather never think about them again.
Three days after I first found the box, I went to sleep again. Ah~, no matter how exhausting my days get, my bed will always be there for me. Bed-chan, you are my hero!
I quickly fell asleep, but not before the fleeting thought of the note from three days came back to mind. I wasn't bothered by it though. After all, what's the worst the sender can do? Strap me to a chair and force me to watch whatever was on that disc?
…
Ah~, I might have had the best sleep of my life! For the first time ever, my dream actually had a conclusive ending! It was about time!
...And I can't remember what it was about. Curse you brain!
I opened my eyes, ready to take on the upcoming day. I was filled with energy right after waking up for the first time in my life. I don't know why, but who cares! I jumped out of bed and landed on my bedroom floor. I absentmindedly noticed that it seemed really dark outside, but I simply assumed I woke up that early.
Looking back, how did I not notice that something was wrong? Because who the hell would be excited to wake up that early?!
Anyways, I went to put on a t-shirt and shorts, just like I have the past couple of days. Once that was done, I walked to my desk and grabbed my phone. Strangely, there were no text messages from anyone this morning. An unusual occurrence for me at this point, although not unfamiliar at all. After all, it was only recently that I started getting actual text messages from other people.
I placed my phone in my pocket and opened up the bedroom door. I expected to see the hallway that I always see when I leave my room. Instead, I got a large room instead.
My brain froze at the sight. This was not what I expected at all when I woke up. I must still be dreaming right?! Just to be sure, I pinched myself in the leg. Ouch, I definitely felt that. But wait? That means…?!
"Oi, what god is messing with me?!"
I got no reply, but that was what I half-expected. No god would actually be generous enough to explain what's going on. Unless I was an Isekai protagonist, but that means I would have died and I refuse to accept that! If I'm going to die, I want to stay dead!
I calmed myself down a little bit and looked around the room. The walls were wood colored and the back of the room had sixteen different looking doors. In addition to that… wait, why were there theatre seats? And why was there a screen in the front of the room?
Did I get summoned to a theatre of all places? If so, why? I couldn't think of anything-
Oh. Did those cursed DVDs have something to do with this? Well crap. Maybe I should have actually listened to that note…
"Ugh… so tired…"
A voice suddenly spoke from behind me. One that I knew very well. I turned out and saw my sister walking behind me, rubbing her eyes.
"Huh? Onii-chan? What are you doing here?" She said that in such a cute voice that my mood couldn't help but be brightened. Thank you Komachi!
"Your guess is as good as mine."
"What do you mean by that?" Oh, come on! Don't tell me you're an alternate version of my sister that finds these kinds of occurrences completely normal! As if she heard my thoughts, Komachi's eyes widened as she realized the room they were in. "Onii-chan, why are we in a movie theatre?!"
"Like I said, your guess is as good as mine." Wait, that might be a lie, since I actually read the note that came with the DVDs. Still, it made me wonder why someone was crazy enough to drag sixteen of us away into this room. Eh? Where did I get that number? The number of doors, duh! It was earlier in my monologue, brain!
Hold on… sixteen? Don't tell me-
"Eh?! Why are Senpai and Rice-chan outside of my room?!" Oh crap! I had my back turned to the rest of the room, so I didn't notice when one of the doors behind me opened. A feeling of dread filled me when I slowly turned around. Yup, standing there was Isshiki. Thankfully, she was already dressed in something modest. I don't know what would have happened if it was something… revealing.
But what am I supposed to say in this situation?! Thankfully, I didn't have to do anything, because Komachi did the job for me.
"Eek! Why are you here?!" For some reason, my sister decided to hide behind my back. I would comment on how cute it is, but I was more concerned about why she was hiding in the first place.
"D-Don't ask me that! You're two were the ones outside my room!" She pointed at us. Why do I have a feeling that things are going to end badly if I don't intervene? Because of this feeling, I decided to speak up.
"Oi, don't start arguing. Believe it or not, 'outside' your room isn't your house anymore." I gestured to the theatre we were standing in. "Don't ask why it's a theatre, because I don't know."
At my words, Isshiki widened her eyes and looked around the room in shock. "O-Oh…" And then her expression suddenly became foxy as she turned to me. "What did you do this time, Senpai?"
"Oi oi, why did you immediately assume that I have something to do with this?!" Technically, if my DVD theory is correct, then it would be my fault. But I refuse to accept this targeted harassment!
"You didn't say no," commented another voice. My own eyes widened when Yukinoshita walked towards us. She was dressed in a blue sundress not unlike the ones she wore on our various… d-dates. Damn it, she looks really good in that!
That said, I wasn't going to take that comment lightly! But before I could rebut her, a blob suddenly appeared out of nowhere and stood right in front of me. What? That's a person?
"Hachiman!" Oh, it's Zaimokuza. "It is a pleasure to see you again! I was planning to ask you to read my newest manuscript today!" You asked me to read your recent one right before break started, how do you already have a new one?! "Unfortunately, it appears that I left it outside of my room. So it looks like you will have to wait until we get out of here!" Why are you assuming I want to read it again?
I flawlessly ignored him and peeked over his shoulder, causing him to let out a cry of anguish. But I could care less. I loudly called out to the empty space beyond. "Who else is there? It's getting annoying with everyone interrupting our conversations."
It was silent for a few moments, before three doors all opened at once. Were they listening in from the safety of their own rooms? That's a really smart idea, why didn't I do that?
"...Good m-morning." A girl with pale blue hair walked in with a nervous looking expression. Her name was… shit, what was it? Honda? Toyota? No no, it started with a K. Kawa...something. I'll go with that for now.
"Saki-Saki! I didn't think you'd be here too!" Next to Kawasomething's door was a girl with brown bobbed hair and glasses. Huh, Ebina is here too? And she knows who the blue haired girl is? Surprising, she seemed like the loner type to me.
She ran over to the blue-haired girl and crushed her into a hug. Ouch. I'm glad I wasn't on the other end of that. Kawasomething looked very uncomfortable and tried to wiggle her way out, but to no avail. Who would have thought Ebina was a strong hugger?
The last door to open belonged to… ugh, Hayama. "Hello everyone," he said with that stupid smile of his. That guy just pisses me off to no end. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Yukinoshita also held a displeased expression at his entry. I never really learned what happened between them, but it's not any of my business.
"Hayama!" Oh, looks like Ebina noticed him. "Wow! I didn't expect for you to be the kind to hide behind a door!" Sounds like you don't know him well.
"Haha, sometimes it's better to take a step back." Don't be so nonchalant about this! We're trapped in a theatre with all of these people! Does that thought not worry you?! Hayama opened his mouth to say something else, but he was interrupted by…
"My my~, I didn't think I would see you here, Hikigaya-kun." Oh no! Not her! Behind Yukinoshita appeared her devious older sister, Haruno. Of all the people that I hoped wouldn't show up, she was at the top of the list. Wait, am I already starting to accept this was normal?!
"Nee-san, please do not be annoying as usual," the younger yukinoshita chastised her sister. "Your antics will not be taken well in this situation." Ouch. Her insults, while lacking some of their bite, still have the potential to completely obliterate someone's self-esteem. It's a miracle Zaimokuza came out of her "criticisms" unharmed!
"Ow~. You're so mean, Yukino-chan!" She cried out with a pout. Then she flawlessly brushed off the insults and turned to the rest of us. "So it seems like everyone is here. I wonder who decided to do that…" For some reason, Haruno turned her eyes to me. What?! You too?!
"Why does everyone think I'm responsible for this?! As a loner, I would never choose to willingly be with this many people at once!" I shouted out. If I had the power to teleport people, I'd use it to teleport nearly everyone else away from me.
"That aside," Yukinoshita spoke up. "What do you mean by everyone? There are plenty of people that are not gathered here." Good point, but did you fail to count the amount of doors? That's out of character for you!
As if to rebut what she just said, another door opened up. Walking out of the room was an angel with silver hair. What? Did I say something wrong with that? I only speak the absolute truth!
"Umm… hi!" Listening to Totsuka's voice was like hearing heaven. Ah~, take me away!
"Onii-chan, you have a creepy expression on your face." And just like that, Komachi broke the illusion and returned me back to reality. "You should only be making that at Yuki-nee!"
Thankfully, she whispered that so I was the only one who heard it, but it still caused my face to feel really hot. Komachi, that was seriously low on points! But before I could say anything out loud, two doors opened and revealed the occupants
"Hayato!" Oi, what's with everyone coming out one after one?! Seriously, doesn't everyone have different sleep schedules? This time it was Miura, the blonde haired woman who had a huge crush on Hayama. Who's going to be next? Tobe? Ha, just kidding-
"Hey Hayato! How's it going?" ...seriously?! Are these people messing with me?! Don't tell me his entire clique is here! That would be a nightmare!
...Ok, good. Looks like we're okay-
"Yahallo!" The door next to Tobe's slammed open, making me jump in surprise. It was Yuigahama, who still had her eyes closed. "What's for breakfast- EEK!" Oh, looks like she finally opened her eyes. "W-Why are you all here?"
"Do we look like we know?" I called out. Ugh, all of these people are just putting me in a bad mood. Can we please wrap up the introductions soon so I can be alone?
As if they heard my thoughts, the final three doors opened, although one of them was slower than the rest. The first one to walk out was… Orimoto? That was a surprise. Well, at least I'm over my middle school memories, so the sight of her wasn't as painful as it once was. She didn't say a word, but when she spotted our group, her eyes widened in shock.
The next was our single teacher, Hiratsuka-sensei. Right as I thought that, her eyes suddenly turned to me and she gave me a glare. "Hikigaya… are you thinking of something bad?" Is she an esper?! "For some reason, I really want to punch you right now." I didn't even think of anything bad! I merely said you were single, that's just the truth!
I had a bad feeling that if I did nothing, I would suffer. But I couldn't just prostrate myself in front of all of these people! My ego and pride would be unable to handle it! Thankfully, the last door seemed to distract Hiratsuka from me.
"Oh… what's going on…" Huh? Is this really Shiromeguri? The real one would never sound that dead! Who are you?! "Eh? What's everyone doing here? Is this a party for me?!" Ah, there you are. But why was a party for you the first thing you thought of?
"Huh, what are you all doing here?" Hiratsuka asked everyone. Wait, did she seriously ask that after she threatened me? What are your priorities, woman?!
"That is what we are trying to find out, but we keep getting interrupted by… our new arrivals," Yukinoshita calmly replied. "However, it seems like everyone is now here. Thus, we can now properly discuss."
Now normally, I would have stuck around for that, since it actually directly impacted me. For some reason, however, I was feeling this strange pull dragging me towards the theatre seats. I can't even make a joke about this, it was too strange.
Maybe I should investigate? Actually, I have the perfect excuse lined up!
"I'll be over here, looking around for clues," I called out to the others while pointing to the theatre seats. I didn't like the idea of following the pulling, but it was getting really annoying. So here I was, walking towards the seats while the others looked at me in confusion. Please stop, this is kind of embarrassing!
Soon enough, I had reached the back row of the seats. After that, the rows moved downwards, similar to a movie theatre, only that they were placed close together so the height difference between the first and last rows were minimal.
"Huh… there's a lot more than sixteen seats…" Whoever made this theatre just wasted a lot of money! Oh well, it's none of my business. As my eyes wandered over the seats, I noticed a singular seat in the front row that looked slightly different than the others.
All of the other seats were red colored and appeared to have the ability to recline. At least the maker got those right. The difference with the seat I noticed was that there were intricately drawn gold patterns placed along the armrests of the chair. How odd.
I decided to approach the chair, before something froze me in my tracks. Placed on the seat of the chair were three DVD cases. And just like the ones that were in my room, they looked like they completely lacked a cover. It can't be…
Sure, I speculated that we were here because of those cursed DVDs, but getting confirmation that I was right wasn't as rewarding as one would expect. It truly meant that it was my fault that they were here.
Nono… maybe it's something else? Perhaps Hayama also got a set of DVDs and also refused to play them. Yes, it had to be that! Phew, I nearly convinced myself that I actually had anything to do with-
"Onii-chan, what's wrong? You've been staring at that chair for a while now…" Oh shit, was I being watched? I turned to my left and saw that Komachi and the service club were standing near the back row. They must have decided that the theatre was the area to look for answers.
"I-It's nothing. Just noticed that one of the chairs looks a little differently than the others." I pointed to the chair as I walked towards it. I needed to take a closer look at those cases before I could properly blame myself. As much as I wanted to blame Hayama for this, I needed to be logical.
Thanks to my superior hearing, however, I heard Yuigahama whisper to the other club members. "Hikki seems a little off, doesn't he?" I ignored it and came upon the chair.
I picked up the case and inspected it from all angles. I felt dread as I opened it up and saw the exact same disc that I put into our DVD player. Denying it at this point would be running away from reality. This was-
"Eh? Isn't that the creepy DVD you used that one time?" Komachi suddenly asked from behind me. Crap, I didn't want her to know now!
"What do you mean by that?" Yukinoshita asked. This was followed by nods from Yuighama and Isshiki.
Komachi looked a little nervous as she opened her mouth, but I beat her to the punch. "Basically, some loser decided it would be a brilliant idea to put a black box with these things in my room. I decided to test it out and ended up getting a weird… counter thing?" I was being purposely vague about it, but my sister foiled my plan.
"Don't forget that it listed off our names!"
"Huh? What does that mean?" Isshiki asked with a head tilt. Sorry kouhai, but you don't compare to Komachi's head tilts! Still, it's pretty impressive. A lower being would have fallen for it! But back onto the topic that has been brought up.
I let out a sigh at the memory. I guess it won't hurt to mention everything that doesn't include the note. "When I put the disc into our DVD player, it listed off me and Komachi's names. As for that counter I mentioned, it showed a maximum of 16." More proof that these are why we are here, since there are sixteen doors. To make matters worse, everyone that's here was also on that list.
Apparently Yukinoshita made that same connection, because her eyes widened after I said that. Yuigahama, however, didn't pick on it. "Eh? What makes that number so special?"
I let out another sigh. "Count the amount of people that are here. That'll explain it." Even an airhead like her would surely figure it out from that, right?
She seemed to suddenly take a focused expression as she mentally counted the people that had arrived. It took her a little longer than it would have taken me to do, but she eventually widened her eyes in shock. "Eh?! Why are the numbers the same?!"
I considered explaining my possible theory, but that's when the sense of control I had over this was completely wedged from me.
Finally! Sorry for the wait. We can now begin!
What the hell?! I looked around in a panic, wondering who the hell spoke. But no magical gods suddenly appeared in front of me. Next to me, the others appeared to also be looking around. Ok, good, I wasn't going crazy.
"W-What was that voice?" Komachi asked in a very nervous tone. Oi, don't make her so scared! Whoever you are, you'll regret this!
I apologize for the sudden intrusion! I'm speaking directly into your minds, so you won't be able to find me. Anyways, I think you all want answers, don't you? Just head over to the theatre and pick a seat!
Ugh, being told what to do by a god is awful. Huh, why am I accepting this situation so quickly? Is my mind being messed with?!
Ignoring those thoughts, I moved to pick a seat along the aisle, but before I could take a step, the voice stopped me.
Oh, by the way, Hikigaya. You must sit in the golden seat.
And just like before, I felt a sudden pull trying to drag me away from my current position. It was far stronger than the one earlier. So strong that I was actually dragged off my feet. My eyes widened as I abruptly flew through the air and smashed into the chair. Strangely, I felt no pain, but I still cried out in shock of the sudden event.
The people near me stared at me in surprise. They remained unmoving, which was a natural reaction for when your classmate suddenly got slammed into a chair like he was nothing.
"...I hate this." Seriously, what the hell was this god's game? I slumped into my chair, done with this stupid theatre. It hasn't even been that long either.
Please, ignore that. Now, choose any seat you wish!
"Onii-chan!" I felt my right hand being grasped by my sister. But I barely noticed it. I simply stared ahead at the screen while thinking of ways to curse this god. I didn't even notice that the seats around me were being taken. Well, not at first.
My left hand was grabbed by Yukinoshita, which snapped me out of my stupor. Whoa, what was that? I was very vengeful for a moment there. I feel like my mind's being messed with...
I looked around my immediate surroundings to see who was sitting near me. To my disappointment, all the nearby seats were taken. Damn it, I wanted to be alone!
Still, it wasn't all bad. To my left was Yukinoshita, with Yuigahama sitting next to her. To my right was Komachi, while Isshiki sat next to my sister. For some reason, she was pouting. Who knows why?
Then right behind me was… Zaimokuza? I guess he barely knows anyone else here, so he probably wanted to be near me at least. To his left was an angel- er, Totsuka. Huh, no one else was sitting near him. Really? I would have done that immediately! To his right was Hiratsuka-sensei, who held a concerned look as she observed the theatre. I couldn't see if there were any others beyond her though.
Before I could see where Hayama's clique was sitting, I was once again interrupted by an infuriating voice.
Looks like everyone is ready! Hooray! Now I bet you all are curious as to why you're here, aren't you?
No one replied, but everyone had that thought in mind.
Well, you see here, I'm bored.
At those words, a chill went down my spine. From all of the light novels I've read, I learned that a bored god is a dangerous one. This was bad!
Oh, my bad! I just realized that I never introduced myself! Hmm, do you guys deserve to know my name?
You know what, how about you all just call me Mr. Voice! Or Voice-sama, in your language.
This was a guy?! Actually, they didn't sound like a girl either. They just sounded genderless, so I guess its not too far fetched. Either way, I refuse to refer to this god as a superior!
Some of you appear to be discontent with this… but oh well! Back onto our topic!
As I stated moments ago, I'm bored. So I was thinking of things that I wanted to do, when I got an idea!
Uh oh. Why am I getting a very bad feeling about this? Well, it is a god, so I think that's natural.
I decided to check out the multiverse! And in that process, I found a set of DVDs that made me quite curious! I watched them to see what it was about, and ended up having quite the experience!
So then I thought, what if a certain group of people watched it too? I wanted to see what the results of that would be!
Apparently the multiverse was a thing? But that's not important right now! What was on those DVDs that made a god decide that a bunch of nobodies needed to watch them?
I originally gave them to Hikigaya here, in the hopes that he would follow the instructions and play them while in the comfort of someone's house! But to my dismay, he refused to bring people over!
"Eh? Hikki had instructions with this?" Yuigahama asked while turning her head to me. I also felt some other people staring at me from behind, but I ignored them. Rather, I decided to reply to her question.
"I… sort of did. But I wasn't about to call up everyone here by my own will! I'm a loner, that's not going to change!" And besides, what would you have done?
Sigh, Hikigaya is stubborn I see. Well, it doesn't matter now, because you're all here! So now we can finally begin! Just put those discs in-
"Wait," Yukinoshita called out. "You never told us what was on those DVDs that you mentioned. Would it not be wise to tell us about them?"
Brilliant question! However, I want to keep it a surprise! So you'll have to wait until it starts before you find out! Now, Hikigaya, please place that first disc into the player. And don't bother stalling or breaking it, because I can just make you do it.
Damn it! I was planning to do that! Well, I wasn't going to disobey any gods anytime soon, so unfortunately I have to follow his command. I grudgingly pulled out the first case I picked up and grabbed the disc. That's when I realized that I had no idea where the player was.
"Oi, where's the player for this thing?" I called out.
Oops, forgot to pull it out! My bad!
Suddenly, right in front of my chair, a DVD player rose out of the ground. I raised an eyebrow at the design of it. Somehow, there was not a single wire sticking out of it. Without me doing anything, the disc tray opened up. With a sigh, I placed the disc onto the tray.
The tray retreated back into the DVD player and it sunk back into the ground. As that happened, the screen in front of the theatre suddenly fired up, showing flashes of light for a moment, before it turned black again. Then words suddenly appeared on the screen.
"Checking for sufficient people within radius…"
Oh, it's this thing again.
"Hachiman Hikigaya: Detected. 1/16."
"Komachi Hikigaya: Detected. 2/16."
"Yukino Yukinoshita: Detected. 3/16."
Huh, that's new. Guess this is a person detector after all. Beside me, Yukinoshita gasped in surprise at the sight.
"Yui Yuigahama: Detected. 4/16."
"Eh? That's me!" Well duh. You're here watching this with us.
"Iroha Isshiki: Detected. 5/16."
"Ahh, this is scary~." For some reason, I can't trust that voice of yours.
"Yoshiteru Zaimokuza: Detected. 6/16."
"But of course! It is an honor to be one of the sixteen chosen to witness this glorious moment!" Shut up Zaimokuza.
"Saika Totsuka: Detected. 7/16."
"Wow, I haven't been to a movie theatre in a while!" Really? You should have asked me to come with you!
"Shizuka Hiratsuka: Detected. 8/16."
"Yes! Top half!" She pumped a fist in victory. I don't think you're taking this seriously at all!
"Saki Kawasaki: Detected. 9/16."
"Hina Ebina: Detected. 10/16."
"Look Saki-Saki, it's us!" I didn't bother looking back, but I thought I heard the sound of shaking, followed by... a slap? What's going on over there?!
"Kakeru Tobe: Detected. 11/16."
"Aw yeah! I'm excited to see the movie we're watching!"
"Hayato Hayama: Detected. 12/16."
"I hope this goes well today." Sounded fake as usual.
"Yumiko Miura: Detected. 13/16."
Surprisingly, she didn't say anything in response. I thought she would have made a comment about being listed after Hayama.
"Haruno Yukinoshita: Detected. 14/16."
She also didn't say anything, but I expected that. How? She just seemed like that type of person.
"Meguri Shiromeguri: Detected. 15/16."
"Haru-san, you've been awfully quiet… this should be exciting!" Eh? I didn't think she would make a comment on that. And she's been quiet the whole time? That's not terribly surprising, but I guess for Shiromeguri, it might be.
"Kaori Orimoto: Detected. 16/16."
"Haha… um, woo?" Wow, that was terrible. I internally winced at that reaction. I actually feel kind of bad for her, but I shook it off.
"All people are within the vicinity. All security barriers have been bypassed. Executing data launch…"
Well, whatever happens next, I need to be calm and logical. I have my sister and my partner next to me, plus people that I tolerate to an extent. Also can't forget the angel herself! Huh, something seemed wrong with that statement.
Have fun! I'll be watching, but I likely won't say a word! Enjoy the show!
A show, huh? It'll probably be some normie shit that even Komachi would hate. That was my thought initially, but I was proven wrong when the title of the show slowly faded onto the screen.
My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected
I don't know why, but I have a very bad feeling about this.
Huh? Is this what you think it is? Yes, it's a Oregairu Reaction Fic.
Why the hell did I decide to write this for my next story? Well, as a reader, I always enjoyed reading fics where the characters of a show react to their own show. However, I used to think this kind of fic would really only work for certain types of animes, and definitely not a romcom like Oregairu. But recently, I rewatched it and as I was watching it, a thought came to me:
Wow, this could be a great reaction fic!
However, there are no characters react to canon for this community, which was surprising (As far as I know, of course. I could be entirely wrong). So after some time of focusing on my other stories, I decided it was time. A reaction fic to Oregairu!
Now, characters. The sixteen that I picked will be the ONLY characters that are in the fic. If you want to know them, I literally list them at the end there. For the prologue, I know that I didn't really characterize the other's aside from Hachiman very well, but it is difficult to have sixteen people talking all at once, so I tried my best.
This does mean that no other characters will be added, so don't ask for more! (The only relevant ones I left out were Sagami, who would have been extremely hard to write probably and Rumi, who's a child and probably doesn't really belong there.) But what about the empty seats? That's for a possible plan I'd like to do in the future, but when I say future, I mean far future. Who knows if I'll ever get there!
This chapter was written in first person, but the reactions will likely be written in a mix of third person and first person. Basically, everyone aside from Hachiman will have theirs written in 3rd person, while Hachiman's will be 1st person.
It'll be my first time writing reactions, so I have no idea how well it will be. It might suck, it might not. I should also warn you: the next chapter will likely take a while to come out. Unless my plans change, the next chapter will cover ALL of episode 1! Woo, let's see how that goes. Also, next chapter I'll probably have more details on where the people are seated (Or I'll link a picture).
I'll see you then!
Update (11/18/22): Uh, ignore the authors note about not adding more characters. That is a lie now. Might be a mistake, might not be. Lol. You'll see when we get to it.