Tiffany's eyebrow twitched as she squinted at the ebony-haired guitarist, who was currently lounging in her chair at the vanity.
Still in her bathrobe.
With 5 minutes left until showtime…
Which wasn't normally too big a deal…if this woman wasn't supposed to be the centerpiece of the whole event.
You can't run a charity and not have the representatives of the prizes not be there, that'd just be insane.
Ashley Rosemary, leader of The Worthless Holes (not really her cup of tea musically, but Audrey assured her they were a big deal), appeared to not even notice her presence, jabbing away on her phone.
"…no, you come off it! I'd never stoop to working for a label so…pedestrian; I get paid hella money to keep repping StayBlack, you think I'd just fuck my career like that?"
It was like Audrey was British…
"Listen, Luv, you tell that no-good arsehole from Gossip Rag Monthly that he can kiss my Ash! …no, I don't care what the actual name is, tabloids are all the same!" She roughly jammed her finger on the call end button (the screen didn't crack, thankfully) before finally picking up a bottle of mascara. "You'd think people would actually pay attention, huh?" she said to no one.
Tiffany took that as a sign to get the woman's attention. "*Ahem*!"
"Hmm?" Ashley glanced in the mirror, finally noticing a rather antsy-looking Tiffany. "Need somethin', Luv?"
"Well…frankly, yes. The auction is about to start in…" She glanced at her phone. "…less than four minutes. Are you sure you'll be ready in time? All the women are supposed to be on stage for the commencement."
"I'll be fine!" Ashley assured the young woman, with an accompanying hand gesture. "This ain't my first rodeo, sweet cheeks; I'll be out there with the rest of those bitches, so just calm ya tits."
Calm blue ocean, Tiffany, calm blue ocean…
"That's great, just super, even! Um…your clothes are over there, by the way." She pointed to the other side of the room, where the musician's dress for the evening hung; it was styled like the one sharkbite swimsuit Nikki had shown her a while back, though without the sharky accents. "Not to tell you what to do, but people usually at least have their clothes on by this point." 3 minutes, 12 seconds to go. "Just saying."
"Aight," was all Ashley said in response.
For the next minute, both women stared awkwardly at each other. Well, it was awkward for Tiffany, Ashley seemed nonplussed.
"…aren't you the MC?" Ashley asked.
"Oh my gosh!" Tiffany pivoted so fast that she almost did a face plant on the dressing room floor as she rushed for the door. "2 minutes left!" she called back.
Now left alone, Ashley glanced over at the dress she was meant to wear for the event. It wasn't bad, per se, but it could use a little bit of Punk in it.
"Shouldn't take more than one minute…~"
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"…and remember, all donations are going to the Glenberry "Home for Wayward Pets" animal shelter, so please, please give generously. Now-" Tiffany gestured to stage right, "-let' meet all the lovely, generous women who volunteered for the auction!"
On cue, a decent portion of the Cheer Squad began walking on stage, all looking positively resplendent in their formal dresses. Following after them was a portion of the female residents, looking equally magnificent (though somewhat less formal) is business casual attire.
The epitome of the modern working woman, in Tiffany's mind.
"Don't they all look splendid tonight, everyone?" The was a solid round of applause following her question, a few giving appreciative whistles. "Just a reminder, you're busy time with these lovely ladies, so be on your best behavior, ok?"
Before she could continue, the sound of a harsh guitar chord cut through the prerecorded backing music Tiffany had chosen for the event, a figure wearing a tastefully(?) torn dress that looked like that shark bite swimsuit that got popular on the internet at one point, a long slit now ran up the right side of the skirt (showing a lot of leg) with many random spots ripped with the finesse of an angry pitbull. The owner of the dress, one Ashley Rosemary, had apparently mussed up her hair and quickly set it with some hairspray, and was now wielding a red Ibenez GRGM21L guitar with a black Anarchy symbol painted on the body.
"What's up, Glenberry!" she shouted, playing a quick few notes, "Who's ready to save some fucking pets!?"
There was stark silence in the entire auditorium.
Miss Rembrandt is gonna kill me for letting that dress get ruined…
fin.
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Somehow, I managed to knock this one out in a few, cumulative hours.
Also, Tiffany's "Calm blue ocean" spiel is basically a feature at this point.