2"You have a brother?" almost the entirety of the Titty Twister- hell, the entirety of Inna de Poona island- exclaimed in unison after hearing Candace's confession.
"Uh-huh!" she nodded, "I coulda sworn I mentioned him at some point…?"
"Not that Oi can recall," Polly spoke up. She was only one of the island's regulars whose jaw wasn't fully on the floor just yet. "Whenever Oi've brought up family you usually just stare wistfully into the middle distance and either murmur 'Ah miss you, Mama' or 'Ah miss you, Lesley', something loike that."
"That's my brother's name! His full name is Lesley Carmen Crush," she stated. "Mine's Candace Jamayma Crush."
"Candance, I was your babysittah; Oi know that already."
"...oh! Silly me, I forgot!~"
"How is it we've roomed together for all this time and I've never known this?" asked an incredulous-looking Nora.
Abia stepped up to the metaphorical podium next, the Latina maid's question going mostly ignored. "U-um…h-how long- OLD! How old is your brother? Eh heh heh…"
Never change, Abia.
"Oh, he's younger than me." A proud smile spread over the dancer's face, "I was always the older sibling.~"
Abia fidgeted in place for a moment. "…what about his shoe size?"
"Alright, back in the corner, Conejo." Nora pulled the Arabian woman back by her ear, causing her to whimper in an unambiguously sexual manner.
"When's he gettin' here?" Polly asked, "You said your brothah was payin' you a visit, but you nevah said when that was."
"Tomorrow."
"WHAT?"
"Geez, you're all so loud today!"
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
"Suki-Chan is super mo-toh, mo-toh excited!" "Suki" Stevens exclaimed, her love handles jiggling a bit as she bounced in place on the beach. "Wah-tah-shee never knew Hentai-Chan had an oh-knee-chan!"
"Like, whoopty-fucking-do? So she's got a sibling," Lillian huffed, "so fucking what? That like, doesn't actually change anything?" The try-hard Goth girl was sitting fully under the shade of an umbrella, a blanket laid out over the beach chair she was reclining in. She was also looking somewhat dry and tender at the moment.
Zoey gave an understanding smile as she shook her head. "We all cautioned you against sunbathing without applying lotion beforehand, Lillian, you have only yourself to blame for that; don't take your anger out on the rest of us."
"I offered to let you borrow some of mine," Lailani pointed out. "But you said, and I quote, 'like, maybe the sun will finally burn me away so I can finally be happy in effing death?', unquote. …I had to censor part of it," she admitted.
"Like, whatever?" She let out an exasperated sigh. "Fuck my life…"
Suki blinked audibly. "So…we're not gonna talk about Hentai-chan's brother anymore?"
"Actually," Zoey said, "I was hoping we would. You see, I had the pleasure of speaking with Miss Crush earlier today just after she made the announcement. However, apart from a very golden aura when I asked what her brother was like, she neglected to give me any actual details about the man." She drew her legs up to her chest, glancing out to the ocean. "I must confess, there's something intriguing about this mysterious brother of Miss Crush's."
"Like…how? You don't even know a fucking thing about him?"
"For the same reason the Sun and the Moon know one will rise as the other sets, and why certain animals are able to sense danger before it happens: it's simply instinct."
"Whatever…"
"Do you mean like…?" The Polynesian girl made a nebulous gesture with her hands.
"There is an element of clairvoyance to this feeling, yes," Zoey answered, "but I will need to meet him in person to confirm any suspicions I might have."
"Well, I just hope he likes anime," Suki remarked.
"I hope he's a fucking vampire? Cuz then I'll have at least one person on this stupid island I can fucking relate to…"
"I just hope he's a nice guy." A faint blush then graced Lailani's cheeks. "…but I wouldn't mind if he has a nice butt either…"
"In any case…" Zoey gestured to the horizon where a small speck could be seen in the distance, "all will be answered sooner rather than later, it seems."
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
Everything was a lot more colorful than Lesley Crush assumed it would be. Which wasn't to say that back home didn't have its fair share of charm to it, but there was just something about Inna de Poona that just looked vibrant, even out of the window of the seaplane. Maybe this was just what the tropics looked like? Either way, he was eager to finally step out into the sun again.
"…sir? The plane is landed now," the stewardess informed him, "Do you need a moment before you depart?"
"Oh, sorry there, Darlin'. Just a little lost in thought." He stood up, tipping his Stetson toward the stewardess while flashing her a charming smile. "I appreciate the concern, though."
He could hear the almost imperceptible sigh the woman made once he turned around to grab his luggage from the overhead compartment. Typical, every bit of common courtesy he tried to show always got interpreted as some grand, romantic gesture, and he could never figure out why that was. Mama'd always said "Always be on your best behavior, Lesley; kindness don't cost nothing special, does it?", engraining that mindset into him at a young boy, and for the most part it had served him well.
Even if it was sometimes annoyingly misconstrued.
Maybe it was his round, boyish face?
Still, he was almost off the plane now. Soon it would be a week of fruity drinks, relaxing on the beach, and spending some time with his sister he hadn't seen since Christmas three years ago.
Though getting knocked into the bottom of the boarding ladder when a familiar head of pinkish hair slammed into his midsection was a bit of a brief shock.
"Lesley!" Candace said into her brother's stomach, her arms locked around his waist. "Oh, it's been forever since we've seen each other!"
"Yeah, it has," he strained. "…mind lettin' me back up here, Candy Cane?"
"Hmm? Oh, sorry!" She released her vice-like hold on Lesley's waist, allowing both of them to stand back up. "When I heard what time your plane was coming in, I just had to rush right over here! I guess I forgot to stop rushin', huh?"
"Well, you know what Mama always says…"
"'You can't spell Crush without 'rush'!'"
Then they both broke into laughter and embraced each other in a more traditional hug.
While that was going on, Nora, Abia, and Lailani were all standing a short distance away, unsure of how to announce their presence to the reunited siblings.
Also, they were a little busy taking in the tall glass of water that just stepped off the plane.
"…hey, Abia?"
"Yes, Lailani?"
"Dibs on his butt."
"Fine, it's all yours. …I prefer the front side, anyhow…~"
"Well, I prefer his mouth," Nora interjected, earning her a quizzical glance from the other two women. "What?" she shrugged, "I like it when my partners tell me sweet nothings while we cuddle, you know?"
"Really? Huh, I always assumed that…uh, never mind."
"I can have a sweet side if I want, you don't know!"
"Girls, please! You're missing the show!~" She gestured to Candace and her brother, the latter currently doing some kind of dance that had Candace clapping and giggling.
Abia was drooling a bit.
"Dios mio…Es como un grifo que gotea…," Nora remarked.
After a moment Lesley pointed over at the trio of gawkers, bringing them back to Candace's attention. She then grabbed his hand and practically dragged him over. "Lesley, these are my best friends on all of Inna de Poona! Girls, this is my baby brother Lesley."
"Howdy." He gave a nod at the group. "Well, I'm sure you've heard a lot about me since Candy Cane got my email…but I haven't had the pleasure yet."
"Nora," the chola said, extending her hand. "Candace is my roommate."
"Yeah, she did mention that once or twice," Lesley reciprocated, nodding in understanding.
"And I'm Lailani Keoloha," the Polynesian girl said, giving a small curtesy with her sarong.
"Well, ain't you right proper!" Lesley marveled. "I don't suppose you're a secret roommate I have yet to hear about…?"
"Pfft, oh no, nothing like that!" she dismissed, "She's just been helping me learn how to dance a little bit…."
"Oh, that makes sense." Lesley slung an arm around Candace's shoulder, showing that Candace's brother was somehow taller than the already tall pink-haired stripper. "Candy Cane always was one of the best dancers back home."
"Aw, you're gunna make me blush…!~"
Lesley chuckled, then glances at Abia. "And you are…?"
"Available.~"
Nora elbowed her in the side.
"Ow!"
"This is Abia!" Candace supplied, "She- uh…she works at airport here."
"U-um…and I also visit her regularly at the stri-" Candace quickly slapped a hand over the Arabian woman's mouth.
"At the stream!" she supplied, "There's a real purty stream on the island. No crawdads, though."
This caused Nora to raise an eyebrow. In all the time she'd known Candace the girl had no qualms in telling people what she did for a living. Yet once the subject of her current employment was about to come up she'd all but tried to change the subject.
Gonna have to ask her about that later…
"Oh, I think I know that stream!" Lailani interjected, "You know…" She twirled a lock of her hair around her finger. "I could show you around if you want to…?~"
"As much as I appreciate the offer, Miss Keoloha," he said, "I'm afraid I'll have to take a rain check on that. Right now I'd just like to check into my room and settle down, maybe have some dinner with Candy Cane here; I'm sure we've each got a lot to catch up on."
"Oooh, let's eat at the hotel; I can ask them to make some comfort food like Ma used to make!"
"…I could help you check in?"
Bless your heart, Lailani.
"Good idea! Lemme take your bag for you, Little Brother."
"Nah, I got it; I couldn't put you out like that."
"Nuh-uh! You're my guest right now, so it's only fair!"
"Sis, I got it! I put on a bit of muscle since the last time we saw each other!"
"Well so did I!"
"How about I take his bags?" Nora thankfully suggested, "It's basically my job description anyway."
"…you know what? That sounds fair. It's just the one suitcase, though," he said, handing his luggage over.
"At least the company's better than-"
The instant Lesley's hand left his bag it made a beeline for the tarmac, falling to the ground with a thud.
"Madre de Dios, you smuggling cinderblocks in this thing or something?" It hadn't looked his heavy when he'd been holding it before…
Lesley blinked twice, then glances at his sister. "Is your friend psychic or something?"
"No, that's Zoey, and she ain't here right now. …why?"
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
"Ok, so," Polly regarded her notepad, "he's 6'3", moderate figure, a round, boyish face, greenish eyes, short, blonde hair on the cusp of being strawberry blonde, and he has a dimple on his left cheek?"
"…yeah, pretty much," Lailani nodded. After helping Lesley Crush check into his room she'd been immediately whisked away to the massage parlor and had been busy there for the rest of the evening. It was only the next morning over breakfast that she'd been able to recount the latest visitor to the others.
"Mmm…add a fedora and a handsome suit and he's just moi toype,~" purred the Teleyouber.
"Didn't know ya had a thing for cowboys, Pols," Ashley remarked, taking a bite from her plate of hash browns and breakfast sausage. "Though I wouldn't be surprised if he ends up being hung like a horse, if you know what I mean!~"
Polly gasped. "Miss Rosemarry, that is not proper conversation for the breakfast table!" Next to her Lailani's face did a remarkable impression of a stoplight.
"Oi, don't tell me none of you bitches were thinking it! Besides, you've all seen what Candace looks like; logic says if her genes are that good…"
"I-I mean, he's definitely not unattractive…," Lailani admitted, still blushing, "He kinda looked that one movie star, I forget his name…"
"George Clooney?" Ashley suggested.
"Cary Grant?" suggested Polly.
"Hugh Jackman?"
"Yul Brenner?"
"Tim Currey?"
"Erol Flinn?"
"No, none of them," Lailani shook her head, "I don't even know who half of those people are."
Polly gasped in shock.
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
The next day found Candace leading her brother around by the arm, showing him the island. She had on what was probably her most subdued outfit, pink hot pants and a tube top with the word "onahole" emblazoned in large, friendly letters on the front, in contrast to Lesley's board shorts and open Hawaiian shirt (plus Stetson), which he'd been assured would help with the tropical temperatures.
"And over here is the Smoothie Hut," she pointed out, "they make the best smoothies here, you should try one of the green ones! And across from that is the Starbrand- my friend Lillian practically lives there!" Then she leaned in conspiratorially, "I think she may be a coffee vampire…!"
"No foolin'?"
"Mhmm! And over there's the-" She suddenly stopped short, the neon signage above the Titty Twister currently unlit in the morning sun, though still noticeable.
"…Candace, something wrong?" Lesley asked after a moment of awkward silence.
"Hey, Lesley?"
"…yes?"
"Have you ever been surfing before?" she asked, turning to face her brother directly. "I tried once, but then I did a wipeout and lost my top, and I don't think it's really for me. But you might like it!"
He rubbed his chin a moment. "Well…no, I haven't. To be honest, it kinda looks a bit difficult…"
"Oh, don't worry, Marko's real good at teaching; he can probably show you the ropes in no time!" Then she gave him a playful nudge with her elbow, "You'd look really cool in front of all the pretty girls…~"
"Well then, what are we waiting for?" The was now a twinkle in his eye. "Where'd you say the beach was again?"
Candace elected to hang back once she'd set Lesley up with Marko, sipping on a lemonade at one of the prefab picnic tables towards the back of the beach. This is where Nora found her, sitting across the table and staring right through the young stripper.
"Alright, spill; the hell was that yesterday?" she demanded without preamble.
"…what was what?" Candace asked.
"Candace, I know you can be a little spacey sometimes, but don't play dumb with me." She pointed over to the shore where Lesley was being shown how to balance on his board. "Your Hermano doesn't know you work at a strip club, does he?"
"No, and he ain't gunna!" Candace took a sip of her lemonade. "…He's still my baby brother, he don't need to know about that stuff just yet."
"…so you'd rather he find out by accident?"
"Well, no…"
"So then you're gonna tell him?"
"No!"
"Candace, you gotta tell him eventually. If he doesn't find out on his own, then someone else is gonna let it spill. He's your brother, he deserves to know."
"I know…I just don't want him to hate me, you know? We've always loved each other…, y'know, cuz we're family?" she clarified. "I don't like makin' people mad at me…"
"Yeah, I understand. Look, I'm not gonna force you to tell your brother the truth about what you do…but wouldn't you rather just be honest with him? I've known you long enough to tell when you're not happy, and that's who I see when you keep trying to deflect the conversation away from your chosen profession."
"Oh. …which profession did I choose again?"
Bless her heart, this one….
"You're a stripper, Candace."
"Oh, right! Hehe! I guess I was so distracted that I forgot!"
"Yeah, that's it. Anyway, maybe think coming clean with him, aight? I gotta get back to the hotel before Las Planetas blows a gasket. See you at dinner!"
Candace waved goodbye to her chola friend, that glanced back at where her brother was trying a failing to balance on a surfboard, Marko the instructor patiently helping him keep his balance.
Candace Crush wasn't normally a fearful person, but the thought of never speaking with her brother again…
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
By the time Lesley Crush had finished his lessons the sun was already beginning to set, casting an orange glow over the beach. He'd actually picked up on the basics of surfing fairly quickly- the Crushes were nothing of not an athletically gifted family- …but Marko's goofy, laidback grin had basically turned his brain and muscles to mush.
Like, "grits with too much water added" mushy.
Fortunately, the poor himbo had noticed Lesley's bad attempts at flirting during all that and had innocently said that they could pick things up again tomorrow.
Lesley's heart hadn't stopped trying to escape his chest since.
He currently lay on a towel on the beach, his Stetson pulled over his face as he soaked up the final rays of the sun for the day. As such he didn't notice the visitor who made themself at home on the sand next to him.
"I sense that you are feeling somewhat troubled," the understated voice of Zoey Greene said, prompting the male Crush sibling to prop his hat up, "from what I observed earlier, I suspect that you're carrying a secret that potentially no one else knows yet."
He sat up, resting his arms on his knees. "…you weren't spyin' on me, were you, Miss?"
"Oh, hardly. I was merely passing by earlier when you were having your lesson with Marko." She glanced out of the corner of her eye at the cowboy. "Even without my abilities, I could tell that you fancied him."
"…you're not related to Miss Cleo, are ya?"
There was a faint, almost imperceptible twitch in Zoey's left eye.
"…does Candace know that you're attracted to other men?" she asked in a blatant attempt to not have to acknowledge the infamous TV psychic.
"No…none of my family know." He sighed. "I only just realized it earlier this year, so I haven't had a chance to let any of them know yet."
Zoey nodded. "Coming out is a difficult hurdle to cross, I don't blame you for being apprehensive about it." She gave his shoulder a comforting pat. "…is that why you came to Inna de Poona, to let Candace know?"
Lesley nodded, staring down at the sand. "Somethin' like that… I just…I want to tell her, I don't like keeping secrets from my sister…but she'd kinda got her own ideas about how things should be, and I don't wanna ruin the image she has of me." He sighed again. "We grew up in a very 'conservative' part of the country, so I don't know how she'd handle something like this."
Only once he'd finished saying his piece did Zoey speak again. "Despite my clairvoyance, I'm far from all-knowing; my predictions about the future are often tempered by wisdom, but there is still a chance things may go a way I did not foresee." Then she looked Lesley in the eyes, "But what I have witnessed from similar situations to yours is that the longer you keep putting this off, the harder it will be later on, and the more strife it will potentially result from waiting. Forcing you to have this conversation will do neither side any good, but I believe that Candace will sympathize with you more than you think."
"…wow," the man marveled, "you don't look much older than I am, but you sound like our pastor back home! You know, except for that 'clairvoyance' seein' the future stuff."
"I'll take that as a compliment," she said, getting to her feet. "If you'll excuse me, I promised Miss Aurawell that I would share dinner with her. I wish you the best of luck in coming out to Candace." And with that Zoey began walking off, the setting sun glinting off the weird pair of goggles she wore.
Lesley looked toward the horizon, mulling over his conversation with Zoey…and trying not to think about the way the water had dropped off of Marko's rippling pectorals.
Spoilers, he wasn't doing a good job.
to be continued…
_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
And somehow this story happened. Well...the first part, anyway. I need to get back to some other projects I put on hold for this one, but I will be working on the conclusion to it eventually.
Now to finish up a tale about a certain spider...