3Tony's recently learned that magic, mutants and their secret societies are real. He, unfortunately, learned that HYDRA's been lurking and torturing brainwashed soldiers for decades.
As soon as he'd wrapped his head around that, aliens decided to attack, controlled by a brainwashed demigod from Norse mythology. Said demigod used a magic glow stick to brainwash others.
Finding out that Star Wars is real is undeniably the coolest discovery by far, even if it leaves several questions as to how George Lucas came up with everything. There's clearly a baby of Yoda's species in his penthouse right now.
Maybe George Lucas was visited by aliens before the rest of Earth was aware.
So, in short, Tony's had to come to terms with a lot being real, recently. But he's excited to be interacting firsthand with Star Wars.
Tony whistles as he runs a hand over spaceship on his balcony.
"No offense, James, but this is way cooler than your arm. I don't even have to worry about hurting it." Tony strokes the ship again, and begins talking to it. "Not that I'd ever hurt you, gorgeous. You're in good hands, even if you're not used to Earth Tech. I'm used to doing the impossible."
"Don't start making out with it," Barton calls from inside. Tony would flip him the finger, but is too busy inspecting the ship.
"It's a Razor Crest," the Mandalorian tells him, the only response to his talk. Another thing Tony's been forced to grow accustomed to is taciturn houseguests (and that's not even counting getting used to children and teenagers).
"You ever seen an X-Wing?" Tony asks. "Or the Millennium Falcon? I guess that's one of a kind, like my suits. Sort of. I'm on Mach 47."
The Mandalorian doesn't reply, too busy looking back at his adorable Yoda youngling. Clint has stacked up empty bottles and is showing Harry and Grogu how to throw balls at them, like a carnival game.
Grogu raises his tiny, clawed hand and the bottles start to float.
Harry's green eyes practically burn with jealousy, the way they had when James read about Matilda's revenge and control over her telekinesis. He's heard about how magic and mutant powers couldn't truly be controlled until the teenage years, and here a baby Jedi is purposefully using the Force.
Tony's going to have to explain the difference, and now be totally serious about the reality of all aspects.
Harry chucks his ball at the floating bottles, sending them clattering to the floor. Clint shakes his head, seeming completely unsurprised at how children can go from playing nicely one second to being bitter rivals the next.
Barton sets up a ring toss next. Harry's ring misses but is nudged onto the bottle by magic.
Harry cheers. Grogu pulls the ring back with the Force and gnaws on it.
Tony would wonder more about why Clint seems like an oddly responsible caregiver for a bachelor assassin archer, but the ship is, quite frankly, more interesting.
Tony turns to his masked, Mandalorian companion.
"So, how'd you end up with a Yoda youngling?" Tony asks as he tinkers with a part. The Mandalorian tilts his head, clearly unfamiliar with who Yoda is but recognizing who Tony was referring to.
"He was a bounty," the Mandalorian watches his child play. "I brought him, but they were hurting him,"
"And you couldn't let them," James nods. There's an uncharacteristic familiarity in his voice for a guy who's missing a ton of memories. Tony knows it'd be safe to bet billions that James ended up rescuing and adopting his target, too. "They wanted his powers. Did you know about them?"
"He lifted a mudhorn." the Mandalorian says, and of course it's a creature that Tony doesn't remember from the movies (and he remembers everything).
"I lifted stuff too," Harry grumbles. "What's a mudhorn?"
The Mandalorian describes the beast, and Harry describes elephants and bears as if they're just as unreachable as a creature from another planet.
Tony realizes that Harry's never been to a zoo. Not that Tony had made a habit of visiting zoos, himself, but it seems like a childhood staple that Tony himself had missed out on.
"How would you like to see a real elephant?" Tony asks.
"Can I see a mudhorn?" Harry asks, clearly awed over everything the Mandalorian says.
"They're not here on Earth," Tony turns to the Mandalorian. "Unless you have a stowaway you didn't mention,"
"I have a cape," Harry announces, running to get his Robin cape. He drags James's Batman cape and cowl behind him.
Once the capes are fastened, Harry runs with his cape billowing heroically. He returns with a pillowcase and looks lost as to how to fasten it to Grogu's brown robe. "Why are you wearing a dress?"
"It's a robe," Tony chuckles. "You know, like Moody wears."
Harry looks at it doubtfully, though both Moody and Grogu's robes are made of a rough brown material.
"If you had a robe, you'd look like a baby Jedi too,"
"I'm not a baby, he is!" Harry folds his arms petulantly. "What's a Jedi?"
"Peacekeepers of the galaxy. They fight with lightsabers. Those are like repulsor beam swords."
Barton adds "They come in different colors. Red is for the Sith. They're the bad guys,"
"You said no fighting! I'm going to be a baker basketball quidditch star!" Harry puts his hands on his hips. "Can I have a lightsaber?"
"Even I'm not reckless enough to make a lightsaber. I like my limbs attached." Tony says, then looks at James. "Your arm's cool and all, but-"
James simply crouches, tying the cape around Grogu's neck loosely. The Mandalorian keeps careful watch, as if expecting James's prosthetic hand to gain develop an artificial mind of its own and strangle his child.
Harry grabs Grogu's hand, and the two caped children duck into the blanket fort. Harry boasts about it being bigger inside, and the Mandalorian abandons his ship to poke his head in. He stills, seeming shocked by the magically expanded interior.
"They're fine," James says, almost as much to himself as the Mandalorian.
"He's being hunted," the Mandalorian pulls his head out and stands. "By other bounty hunters,"
James nods, his mouth a tight line.
"Hey, you put at least one galaxy and who knows how many years between you and your pursuers," Tony grins. Star Wars has hyperspace, but there was never anything about portals or universe hopping. Speaking of which, he's got his hands on a real hyperdrive right now, and it's a dream come true.
James looks like he'd like to put a universe between himself, Harry and HYDRA.
Harry's chatter and Grogu's baby coos drift from the blanket fort.
Grogu toddles out of the fort to hug the Mandalorian's metal boot. Harry follows.
Harry and Grogu play hide-and-seek together; Grogu buries his face in the Mandalorian's cape while the Mandalorian counts for him.
"Don't tell him where I am, Jarvis!" Harry says as he hides behind the bar.
"I would never, Master Harry." Jarvis replies, though he'd cheated when playing hide-and-seek with Harry and Steve earlier.
Jarvis doesn't speak a word, but when the Mandalorian sweeps his cape away from Grogu, Grogu makes a beeline for the bar.
"You're too young for that," Tony chuckles.
Clearly, Grogu can sense Harry through the force, but it's not mutual. Harry takes a good three minutes to find Grogu in a large round vase that Pepper had picked out, but Grogu always finds Harry's spot on the first try.
Harry gets understandably frustrated and calls an end to the game.
"Grogu and I are a team now," he shares, clearly emulating how the Avengers and X-Men had teamed up with Loki.
"You know," Harry glances at James and the Mandalorian. "You two could form a club. An assassin dad club. Barton could probably join if you need a third member,"
"What makes you think I'm a father?" Barton objects. Tony rolls his eyes. For a super secret spy, his secret's pretty obvious after watching him interact with Harry and Grogu. Tony doubts Hawkeye got that caretaking experience on SHIELD missions.
"Can I join?"
"Are you a dad?" Tony snorts.
Harry sighs. "So it's just grownups like your smoke club with Logan?" He leans to whisper loudly in Grogu's large, pointed ear. "Dad says smoking's bad, but he does it anyway."
"I'm already part of a creed," the Mandalorian tells James.
Harry takes Grogu's hand again. "We'll make our own club," he says as they crawl back into the fort. "No grownups allowed!"