101Disclaimer ~ I do not own Miraculous Ladybug or Batman
Marinette - Strawberry
Tim - BatWatcher
Strawberry: I swear to god, if Lila doesn't stop saying I stole all my designs from her, I'm gonna rip off her sausages and choke her with them!
BatWatcher: Perhaps my French is wrong, but did you say her...sausages?
Strawberry: OMG
Strawberry: You're not Kagami!
Strawberry: I am so sorry! I had the wrong number!
Strawberry: You must think I'm a psycho!
BatWatcher: No no no!
BatWatcher: It's fine!
BatWatcher: My brothers make worse threats on the daily.
BatWatcher: honestly this is the most interesting thing that's happened to me in weeks
Strawberry: oh.
Strawberry: I'm still going to apologize. That was probably the weirdest wrong number text you could have gotten
BatWatcher: you'd be surprised. One of my brothers meant to send something to his girlfriend and accidentally sent it to me. Scarred me for life. Though it makes for good blackmail at least.
Strawberry: I'm sorry something so horrible happened to you
BatWatcher: Thank you! Finally someone gets it!
Strawberry: But the mental image is causing me to die laughing.
BatWatcher: …
BatWatcher: I take it back. You're just as bad as my brothers.
Strawberry: Nooooo!
Strawberry: I'm sorry!
Strawberry: I promise I won't laugh anymore!
Strawberry: Stranger come back!
Strawberry: You can blame it all on me!
Strawberry: I was wrong and I just can't live without you!
BatWatcher: OKAY!
BatWatcher: I forgive you! Just stop with that song before it gets stuck in my head!
Strawberry: Yay!
Strawberry: Also, it's too late for me. I've already fallen victim to the song
BatWatcher: Nooo!
BatWatcher: Quick! Listen to this! It'll cure you!
BatWatcher: [Attachment: Link]
Strawberry: I've never heard something more beautiful in my life. It has saved me with its harmonious melody.
BatWatcher: Knew you'd like it
Strawberry: So you're a mind reader huh?
BatWatcher: Shhh! Don't tell my brothers. I have them fooled into believing my only superpower is to survive having more caffeine in my body than blood
Strawberry: Hah! Same. Though with my friends instead. I don't have any siblings :(
BatWatcher: I'll give you some of mine. I have too many
Strawberry: Ooh boy. Now I have to ask. How many?
BatWatcher: Biologically, Legally, or Emotionally? Because I assure you there IS a difference.
Strawberry: 8/10 for the meme usage. And All of the above as my answer.
BatWatcher: Why only 8/10?
Strawberry: The original is about a parent about his children. You used it about your siblings.
BatWatcher: Good point.
BatWatcher: Well, there's only one biological child to our dad, as far as we all know at least. We didn't learn about him until the brat was 10. I'm one of four adopted kids. That's another two older brothers and a sister. My oldest brother is married so that gives me a step sister as well. There's another boy and two girls that are basically adopted and are apart of the family, but the paperwork hasn't gone through yet so they're not technically adopted. That means I have eight siblings all together.
BatWatcher: I...think that's everyone? Unless Bruce has adopted a new one since I last checked. He has a problem.
Strawberry: I'm so jealous. I've always wanted a sibling.
BatWatcher: My offer still stands. Take any of mine. Except Cass. She's my favorite. Heck, she's everyone's favorite. It's a fact.
Strawberry: I might take you up on that offer. It's very tempting.
BatWatcher: Awesome. I'll mail them to you as soon as you're ready.
Strawberry: Sweet! But there's a very important question. Can they cook? 'Cause my parents own a bakery and I help out when I can.
BatWatcher: That's pretty cool actually.
BatWatcher: But no, only one of my siblings can cook as far as I'm aware. The rest of us have been banned from the kitchen for life.
BatWatcher: Last time we tried to cook, a food fight broke out and the item we were trying to make was a hockey puck by the end
Strawberry: …
Strawberry: I honestly have no words.
Strawberry: What were you making?
BatWatcher: A cake. Not even a fancy one. Just a plain old chocolate cake. That they bought from the store.
Strawberry: …
BatWatcher: I can sense you judging me.
BatWatcher: In my defense, I was not a part of the food fight or the actual baking. I just sat at the table, recorded the chaos, and kept me and my coffee out of the war zone.
Strawberry: Then you are forgiven.
Strawberry: Your siblings on the other hand…
BatWatcher: I will PAY you to scold them for that baking fail
BatWatcher: Extra if you can successfully get them to bake a cake without mess
Strawberry: Hun the first rule about baking is that there is ALWAYS a mess. However, there's ways to minimize the mess, as in if you clean as you go then there aren't any real issues.
BatWatcher: I shall take your advice to heart.
BatWatcher: Actually, since you do seem to know what you're doing...can you teach me?
BatWatcher: Not doubting you! Just need to see something happen before I can fully believe your skills
Strawberry: No I completely understand. I don't take much at face value anymore because of a liar in my class
Strawberry: Her lies are so obviously lies but nearly everyone in my class believes her without a second thought
BatWatcher: Is this that Lila person with the sausages?
Strawberry: Yep~
BatWatcher: I still think my French is wrong. I can't understand sausages. Does she like...carry a plate of them everywhere she goes?
Strawberry: 😂😂😂😂
Strawberry: that comment almost killed me
Strawberry: I'm not even kidding. I literally choked on my drink.
BatWatcher: Whoops. Sorry?
Strawberry: Somehow I think you're more amused than sorry but I accept anyway
BatWatcher: Yay!
Strawberry: Anyway. Sausages.
Strawberry: It's actually the way she styles her hair. It looks like there's a sausage on either side of her head.
BatWatcher: …
BatWatcher: Why?!
Strawberry: I have no idea.
Strawberry: Hang on a sec. I'll find a picture of her.
Strawberry: My description just can't do it justice
Strawberry: [Attachment: 1 Image]
BatWatcher: Oh god.
BatWatcher: You weren't kidding.
BatWatcher: They're sausages.
BatWatcher: Congratulations Stranger. You have officially broke my brain.
Strawberry: Be grateful you don't share a class with her
BatWatcher: I am extremely grateful.
BatWatcher: I just…Wow. She's giving me bad vibes just over a picture
Strawberry: That's Lila for you.
BatWatcher: So what's the deal with her? I doubt just anything would make you threaten to choke someone
Strawberry: You've got that right. There's only two people I've ever met that's driven me to that point.
Strawberry: Well, three I guess. But the last one wasn't nearly as bad as the other two. And she's been working super hard to improve herself. She's now one of my best friends.
BatWatcher: I'm glad to hear that, but don't think I didn't notice you trying to change the subject. Just how bad is this Lila person?
Strawberry: Honestly?
Strawberry: Bad.
Strawberry: But I'm afraid if I start telling you about her, I'm not gonna stop and I'd feel bad about unloading all my issues on a total stranger
Strawberry: No offense!
BatWatcher: None taken. I completely understand.
BatWatcher: I wouldn't mind getting to know you better though. We haven't even been talking for an hour and I feel like we'd get along pretty well
Strawberry: I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like that
Strawberry: It's almost scary how easy you are to talk to
BatWatcher: That might be the anonymity of it. No pressure or reputations forcing us to maintain a public image. Just two people talking about random things.
Strawberry: Couldn't have said it better myself
Strawberry: So what random thing would you like to talk about?
BatWatcher: Uhhh….
BatWatcher: We could try to get to know each other a little better? Like uhh...Do you have any pets?
Strawberry: Starting off easy with the questions
Strawberry: I appreciate it
Strawberry: but nope. Since we live above the bakery, my parents said I couldn't have any. But I've always wanted a hamster
BatWatcher: Hamsters are cute, I will admit
Strawberry: What about you? Do you have any pets?
BatWatcher: Not me personally. My youngest brother does though
Strawberry: Really? What animal does he have?
BatWatcher: Animals. He probably has enough to start a petting zoo at this point.
BatWatcher: He has a cat, dog, turkey, and cow. But he's also tamed most of the wild animals that live around us.
Strawberry: That sounds awesome
Strawberry: Your brother is a Disney Princess confirmed
BatWatcher: I'm so going to call him that!
BatWatcher: He'll probably murder me but…
BatWatcher: YOLO
Strawberry: OMG! If (oh who am I kidding, WHEN) you do please, PLEASE record and send it to me!
Strawberry: I'm begging you
BatWatcher: If I survive long enough to send it, I promise I will. You can keep a copy of it for future blackmail
BatWatcher: Cause like, I'm good, but I have so many nosy siblings so it's difficult to find good hiding places.
Strawberry: I'd gladly keep a copy of your sibling blackmail. I was going to say "any blackmail" but I know better than to say that. I learned my lesson very early on.
BatWatcher: You're smarter than me. I once said I'd do anything for coffee. My brother used that against me.
BatWatcher: Told me to backflip out of my classroom's window. On the second floor. I did...but broke my leg as a result.
Strawberry: That legit sounds like something I'd do for coffee.
BatWatcher: The boredom of being stuck with a broken leg is not worth a single cup of coffee. However, if I hadn't landed on someone's discarded backpack, I totally would have nailed the landing and THAT would most definitely have been worth the coffee.
BatWatcher: Though I have managed to guilt my brother into 10 cups of coffee as a result so…
BatWatcher: The boredom has been killing me but at least I'm being productive in my work.
Strawberry: I completely understand that. I've had a cold these last couple days so I had to stay home. I wasn't even allowed to do anything more than embroidery or sketching
Strawberry: Though the design I'm currently working on has a lot of embroidery needed so admittedly it did help me make a bunch of progress. I've cut down a week's worth of work on it in the past two days.
Strawberry: Today was my first day back to school though.
BatWatcher: Yuck.
Strawberry: Yep. Gonna need to take another sick day just to catch up on all my missed work
BatWatcher: Mood.
BatWatcher: I'm currently at school unfortunately.
Strawberry: oh no! Why didn't you tell me sooner! I don't want to get you in trouble with your teacher!
BatWatcher: Nonono it's fine!
BatWatcher: I have a free period right now
BatWatcher: no worries
Strawberry: don't scare me like that. I think my soul just left my body
BatWatcher: sorry?
Strawberry: hmm. I have this suspicion that was more like a question than an actual apology
BatWatcher: probably because I put a ? at the end there
Strawberry: *GASP*
Strawberry: you're right! Mystery solved!
Strawberry: the world's greatest detective needs to take lessons from you
BatWatcher: 😂😂
BatWatcher: You're crazy, you know that?
Strawberry: Better than being boring
BatWatcher: Tru tru
BatWatcher: I hate to say this, but the bell is about to ring
Strawberry: Oh
Strawberry: Guess that means you have to get back to class huh?
BatWatcher: yeah
BatWatcher: But if it's alright with you, I'd like to message you after school lets out?
Strawberry: I'd like that
BatWatcher: Then it's official. If it's not too late in your time zone, I'll text you in four hours
Strawberry: Psssh. That's barely night time. I'll be awake
BatWatcher: don't most people go to sleep at night time tho?
Strawberry: I'm not most people~
BatWatcher: me neither
BatWatcher: truth b told, I'm a bit of an insomniac
Strawberry: SAME!
Strawberry: coffee is literally the only thing that gets me through the day
BatWatcher: literally me
BatWatcher: Are you sure we aren't the same person?
Strawberry: are you a 14yo French female?
BatWatcher: nope
BatWatcher: I am a middle aged Russian man. Exact age unknown
Strawberry: see I know that's a lie cause you have a sense of humor
BatWatcher: ouch. All the middle aged men just took a punch to the gut
Strawberry: hah
BatWatcher: okay but seriously
BatWatcher: i am just a 15yo American male
Strawberry: then unless someone severely messed up the cloning process, I think we are safe
BatWatcher: i don't know if that's a relief or a disappointment
Strawberry: no idea. Flip a coin?
BatWatcher: heads. Guess that means I'm relieved you aren't my clone
Strawberry: who's to say you aren't my clone?
BatWatcher: you got a point
BatWatcher: honestly it's probably safer if there's only one of us each in the world
Strawberry: the chaos I cause on the daily would be a disaster if there were too of me
BatWatcher: that, and my siblings can barely handle the one of me. Two of me would likely cause a couple of them to commit murder
Strawberry: at least they'd have a spare
BatWatcher: …
BatWatcher: I don't know whether to compliment your logic (cause that's something I would say to people) or be offended that you'd kill me off so quickly
Strawberry: the world may never know
BatWatcher: oof. Right in the feels
Strawberry: mdr
Strawberry: I guess I need to let you get to class now
BatWatcher: unfortunately
Strawberry: ttyl?
BatWatcher: definitely! I haven't had this much fun talking to someone in ages!
Strawberry: me neither. Have fun in class!
BatWatcher: thanks. I'll try
BatWatcher: have fun…Uhh…not sleeping?
Strawberry: I'll do my best~
This is a birthday gift to one of my best friends. I've known her since sixth grade and she has just turned 22 today, so Happy Birthday girly. Timinette is one of her favorite ships so when I rediscovered this story, I knew I had to post it for her today. I actually happened to write this like 2 years ago, but I wrote it on some loose paper and then promptly lost the papers. I found them probably two weeks ago and started typing them up so I wouldn't lose them again. I have a scene that will go in probably chapter 3 written out too, and most of another chapter that will be included a couple chapters after that. Maybe sooner, depending on how I want to do the chapters in between.
Fun Fact! The link Tim sent to Marinette is the Witch Doctor song. Don't have a clue why, but that's what I had in my original notes for that chapter when I was typing it up so that's what the song is.
I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! I have no idea when the next one will be uploaded, as I am still trying to work on several other stories at the moment, but I have already started chapter 2 so who knows? Stay tuned and find out!
To my sister in all but blood: Happy Birthday once again! I hope you enjoyed your gift!