AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

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Forums - Human Affairs - Tourism - Tourism Problems

Thread: MASSIVE PROBLEM

Cynosure (OP): MOD I'm not sure if this is the right place for this thread, so don't snipe me, but I'm kind of freaking out right now. Apparently this big paranormal show is coming to Amity. They're always garbage, I know, but what if they actually see something? We already have so many stupid tourists. This thing is viewed nationally.

Pharaoh (MOD): Mod here. OP, we're going to need some more detail if we're going to figure out what to do, if anything. Unfortunately, we can't actually stop outsiders from coming in.

merknlurk: we could if you weren't a coward

Pharaoh (MOD): Once again, we're not killing anyone.

Bog Mummy: Hey OP how do you even know this. Are you watching this show.

Cynosure (OP): Take your bad grammar and stuff it. I'm looking for a good link now.

Phantom (MOD): Is this that Cryptid Crawl thing? If so don't worry about it. National or not no one takes those guys seriously. We just have to play unfriendly locals and steer them away from any fights.

Cynosure (OP): I've never heard of Cryptid Crawl before. I'm talking about this.

Phantom (MOD): ****.

.

[Video starts, showing two young men standing in front of a bank of old CRT television sets. The sets initially show static, but moving humanoid figures can soon be distinguished in them. Eventually, letters resolve from the static to spell out 'The Investigation.' Video shifts to a montage of the same two young men in various locations. Locations include: an underground area shot in night vision, a bridge during the day, walking around a field with backpacks and EMF sensors. The montage fades out, then fades back in to reveal an office-like space with several conspiracy cork boards. The two young men walk in. Both are wearing flannel shirts with the sleeves rolled up. They are joined by a third extremely tall man who is wearing a trench coat and turtleneck sweater. While the other two men are posed naturally, looking directly at the camera, and smiling, the third man has a thousand-yard stare and is standing completely straight. Words at the bottom of the screen briefly identify them as Ned, Azrael, and Jimmy.]

NED: Welcome, investigators, to the first half of our very first two-parter.

AZRAEL: And to those of you joining us for the first time this very special day, welcome to our Investigation into all things paranormal. I'm Az, and this is my older brother Ned.

NED: And this is our best friend Jimmy.

JIMMY: Hng.

NED: You're right, we're not paid for introductions. What we are paid for is investigating the truth behind paranormal events all across America. So. Az, tell us. What are we doing this week? Where are we headed?

AZRAEL: This week we're not headed anywhere.

NED: What? But we've got to go somewhere.

AZRAEL: And we will! You see, we're going to be filming the second half of our two-parter live, on location, in the most haunted city in the world: Amity Park, Illinois.

NED: Allegedly haunted. And why aren't we going this week?

AZRAEL: Because if we went this week, we wouldn't have time to tell our viewers the whole, supernatural history of Amity Park. That's how haunted this place is. We can't even summarize it in one hour.

NED (crosses his arms): It sounds like Az fell for the hype machine, huh, Jimmy?

JIMMY: Hng.

AZRAEL: I did not fall for the hype machine.

NED: You've been tourist trapped, little bro.

AZRAEL: Shut up and let me show you my research, okay? By the end, Jimmy will be agreeing with me. But first, I want to let you know we won't be the only investigators, little i, on the scene. We've got some rivals.

.

The Smart Twin: Hey, I hate to be that guy, but there's more. A whole bunch of the usual suspects were really insulted by the whole Cryptid Crawl thing. And they've teamed up this time.

Cynosure (OP): Are you telling me there's three groups of weirdos about to descend on this town? Three? We already have the GIW and the Fentons. If we get any more, we'll hit some kind of weirdo critical mass.

Phantom (MOD): Hey!

Thecooltwin: Guess that tells us its thename thief today

The Smart Twin: Anyway, the clip I saw is here.

.

[Video starts, showing seven young people and a tiger standing in various power poses. Video has a 'static' effect filter. Dramatic, spooky music plays. The title 'Groovy Ghost Blasters Extreme' fades in.]

VOICEOVER: WELCOME TO THE GROOVIEST BLASTIEST EXTREMEST GHOST TEAM AROUND. WE GIVE YOU VID. THRASH. DOWNLOAD. BRENNER. SULLIVAN. ANDY. FRAN. SCAREDY CAT! PREPARE FOR EXTREME. GHOST. ACTION. IN AMITY PARK. IN ONE WEEK. NO CRYPTIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIDS! SCREW YOU CRAWLEY! YOU SUCK!

VOICEOVER (more quietly and in a completely different tone): BroughttoyoubyGhostBlastersUnlimitedCorporationinpartnershipwiththeGroovyGangandGhostbreakersExtremethisisnotanendorsementofviolencegoodbye.

.

Phantom (MOD): ****!

Phrontist (MOD): Phantom (MOD) Please stop swearing, there are little kids on this server and they look up to you.

Phantom (MOD): I'm not swearing I'm just saying ****.

Phantom (MOD): ****?

Phantom (MOD): ****

Phantom (MOD): Pharaoh (MOD) Did you do this?

Pharaoh (MOD): Oops, I forgot about that.

Phantom (MOD): We're in the middle of a crisis and you do this to me. Unbelievable.

JACK FENTON: this gives me a great idea! :)

[ JACK FENTON has been permanently banned.]

[ JACK FENTON has been restricted from viewing forum posts.]

Phrontist (MOD): I'm not angry. I just want to know who gave him access to the forums again.

Phantom (MOD): ****.

Pharaoh (MOD): Crud, I thought I fixed that. I'll be back on it after I figure out how Mr. Not Supposed to Be Here got back in.

Phantom (MOD): Oh you did. I'm just swearing for real now.

.

AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

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Forums - Community Alerts - Paranormal Investigators

Thread: Paranormal Investigator Discussion Board (PINNED)

Phantom (MOD) (OP): As you may have heard by now, three separate groups of out of town paranormal investigators will be coming to Amity Park next week. These groups range from experienced to clueless and well-regarded to unknown. They will all be attempting to film ghosts and humans for their viewers. Please use this board to post any information you have about these or other groups who may be coming as well as any ideas you have for preventing these groups from successfully spreading more information about our ghosts.

Additionally, certain local ghost hunters may attempt to film and post videos online during this time. As they will undoubtedly complicate the Paranormal Investigator situation, they may be discussed here as well.

Point25Back: why are you saying lOcaL gHoSt HunTeRS we all know its [EDITED BY MOD]

[ Point25Back has been banned for one (1) day.]

Pharaoh (MOD): Speaking of people who are banned, why do we keep letting him back in when he keeps breaking the rules?

Phantom (MOD) (OP): He hasn't tried to dissect anyone yet. Puts him ahead of the curve.

Pharaoh (MOD): Our standards are so low.

Lovetheshow: we're getting a crossover? two crossovers? Best. Day. Ever.

Valorous1: MOD Maybe I'm not the one who should say this but is this guy even from Amity? Or Elmerton?

Pharaoh (MOD): Yeah, we checked.

.

AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Forums - Community Alerts - Paranormal Investigators

Thread: Why are we even trying to stop this?

West of West (OP): I think my question says it all, but just in case it doesn't, why are we trying to stop the TRUTH from getting out? It sounds like someone has an ulterior motive. I say, let the Investigators in. Tell them everything. Let the world know.

Valorous1: If you try to convince any of these idiots that any of the humans in town are ghosts, I will not be responsible for what I do to you.

ashtree: of course you watch the investigators

West of West (OP): It's the Investigation!

[THREAD LOCKED BY MODS. DELETION PENDING.]

.

AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

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Forums - Forum Bugs and Complaints - Complaints

Thread: THE MODS ARE BIASED TYRANTS

West of West (OP): The mods keep deleting my perfectly reasonable and on-topic threads. This is tyranny. We need new mods.

nobineryginger: why haven't they deleted this one then lol man bro you just gotta follow the roleplay rules

West of West (OP): THIS ISN'T A ROLEPLAY.

Phantom (MOD): nobineryginger It's because we think it's funny.

passthemike: Make your own site if it bothers you that much.

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Advice Blog

Recent Articles

Paranormal Investigators, Tourists, and Community Safety

Author: Phrontist

This week, we learned that several groups of Paranormal Investigators will be visiting Amity Park. The last time something similar happened, it was for the one million dollar bounty (since withdrawn) on the ghost Phantom. During that event, and in the immediate aftermath, the damages accrued by the city totalled more than…

READ MORE

A Statistical Analysis of Tourist Injuries and Tourist Related Injuries

Author: Pharaoh

Everyone has that story. You know, the one about how some rubbernecking tourist crashed into your car during a ghost fight, completely derailed an orderly evacuation, or gave Technus ammunition because they couldn't keep their phones in their pocket. In this article, I'll be exploring the relationship between high tourist…

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Do I really need to explain why hunting people on live TV is bad? Apparently.

Author: Phantom

Hello, everyone. I'm Phantom, your friendly neighborhood ghost. Although this fact seems to escape some people, I am in fact a person, and I don't enjoy being hunted. That's a pretty normal thing. I read the Most Dangerous Game, too. That the hunting is being done with a camera and the only thing being killed is my privacy…

Dangerous Ghost Plants and How to Handle Them, Part 17

Author: Photosynthesis

In this latest installment of DGP, we'll be covering Audrey-type carnivorous plants. Now, although these critters are named after the star of Little Shop of Horrors, they typically don't get quite that large, and smaller specimens can be taken care of with careful application of standard gardening tools. We'll be going over DIY and professional…

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Forums - Advice Blog - Do I really need to explain why hunting…

Thread: I'm not hunting anyone, I'm a journalist.

West of West (OP): [EDITED BY MOD.]

Pharaoh (MOD): You might not have named names in this, but you included enough personally identifiable information to doxx not only yourself, but several members of this server, so we're deleting it anyway.

West of West (OP): This is targeted harassment!

Photosynthesis (MOD): Keep this up and you'll be on the same thin ice as Point25Back.

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Forums - Ghosts - Hunting (INVITE ONLY)

Thread: 'Groovy Ghost Blasters Extreme'

Valorous1: I hate to ask, but has anyone here worked with any of the (sigh) 'Groovy Ghost Blasters Extreme' before? I want to have an idea of what they're like before we start talking about them on the public boards and offering help with the 'problem.' As you know, I welcome the idea of more ghost hunters in Amity, but, you know. Competent ones. The name does not fill me with confidence.

My Hair: They've all worked in Amity before. Their tiger almost mauled me once. None of them caught Phantom for the bounty.

The Cooler Phantom: no 1 catches phantom tho xcept val theyr not sprcial

Valorous1: Are you telling me that's a real tiger

JACK FENTON: I caught phantom once!1! super excited to teach new hunters the tricks of the trade! :)

Valorous1: jfc MOD

[ JACK FENTON has been permanently banned.]

[ JACK FENTON has been UNINVITED from the Hunting (INVITE ONLY) board.)

[ JACK FENTON has been restricted from viewing forum posts.]

Photosynthesis (MOD): Pharaoh (MOD) He came back again.

Pharaoh (MOD): HOW does he keep doing this?! He doesn't even know what hacking IS. I ASKED.

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

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Forums - Advice Blog - A Statistical Analysis of Tourist Injuries…

Thread: Fine. You win.

West of West (OP): Your hype squad makes some good points. I guess. I won't expose the TRUTH until the government gets a clue and sets up real ghost countermeasures. But the Investigators are professionals. It doesn't matter what I do. They'll know.

merknlurk: u know u sound like a comic book villain right

Tubalover: Wow and that's coming from merk.

merknlurk: what's that supposed to mean

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

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Forums - Forum Bugs and Complaints - Bugs

Thread: my account stops working all the time :(

JACK FENTON (OP): my account stops working all the time. :(

for a while it workd fine but then I'm not on the page anymore and it wont let me back in. :(

I keep fixing it but it keeps happening. :(

FootballPoet: I think thats because youre getting banned dude?

ashtree: not sure how the mods can make it clearer

tubahater: You break the rules more than Point25Back

JACK FENTON (OP): you sound like the guys who tried to take my license :(

but I'm still driving :)

Cynosure: Well, that's horrifying.

Pharaoh (MOD): JACK FENTON could you tell me how you fixed it? Maybe that will let me figure out what's breaking. 😇

JACK FENTON: sure! :) [EDITED BY MOD]

[ JACK FENTON has been permanently banned.]

[ JACK FENTON has been restricted from viewing forum posts.]

Pharaoh (MOD): Gotcha. 😈

Bog Mummy: brutal

[THREAD LOCKED BY MODS. DELETION PENDING.]

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Forums - Advice Blog - Paranormal Investigators, Tourists, and…

Thread: I SAID YOU WIN

West of West (OP): I said you win. You can call off your attack dogs nkw.

Phantom (MOD): Do you think we run the Advice Blog just for you or?

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AMITY OF AMITY PARK: A Friendly Helping Hand

Ghost Activity Map, Forums, Local Business Directory, Advice Blog

Forums - Community Alerts - Paranormal Investigators

Thread: But they have a point amigos

Roswell's Child (OP): you knwo ive been looking at cryptid crawls stuff and they kinda have a point about phantom. like obv their video stuff has like spectral degradation and all that but its a pretty lit theory you got to admit. and theresthe whole phantm not being a ghost thing food for thought amigos

Cynosure: [Insert: Incredibles 'please, I can't do this again, I'm not strong enough' meme.]

Locker724: What does this mean?