2A.N. Well, been a while since i posted anything, but between Uni kicking me in the nuts with their unpaid internship dealios and plot bunnies running in my head I decided to write and post this instead of A skeleton's Guide, hopefully this will be the kick i need to finish Chapter 9, anyway, here we go, please enjoy and review as usual. I have most of the plot outlined for the first year, so at least there is that, should be able to update more regularly, have fun.
Chapter 1
There are some words, some phrases that change your life, that turn it upside down and shatter it into a million pieces.
And sometimes- sometimes, they can even end it.
"I'm sorry to say this, but you only have six months left, one year at most, if we start the therapy immediately".
"I…I see, so there is nothing we can do then?"
"I am sorry, but your cancer has come back. The form you have seems to be incredibly malignant; we have tried everything we can. At this point, I suggest putting your affairs in order. I will give you a few moments to think about what you wish to do; I'll be behind the door when you decide on what to do."
I stood there for I don't know how long, just staring at the wall before me, my mind a jumbled mess of thoughts with no end or beginning.
I rose from the chair and headed downstairs towards the small garden inside the clinic, trying to find a place to relax and think about what to do next.
I quickly reached the garden and sat down on the bench near the small lake, content to just watch the fish swim without care.
A few minutes passed like that, simply spent calming down and focusing on trying and deciding what to do, when I felt someone else sit down next to me.
It was an older gentleman with white hair and a dark blue eye with a leather eyepatch covering the other. He was dressed in a bespoke suit and with a walking cane clutched in his hands.
I gave him a simple nod of acknowledgement, then turned back towards the lake, looking on as the wind made ripples on the clean water.
We stayed silent for a bit, letting the comfortable silence stretch between us when the man finally decided to speak.
"You seem to have a lot on your mind," he said, his voice deep and scratchy as if he had spent the last year gargling sandpaper and concrete. "I find, most of the time, that the best way to clear your mind is to talk about what upsets you," he said, trying to strike up a conversation.
"What is there to say? I'm dying, this fucking cancer is killing me, and the good doctor gave me six months to live, a year if I'm lucky, even if lucky is not the word I'd use." I answered with a sarcastic smile and got the same one back.
"Well, I'd say that's one mighty spot of bad luck".
"You could say that".
"Is there no one who can help you with this? Trust me, it's better if you have people nearby while going through it. Believe me, I know".
"There is no one," I said with a shrug, scratching my chin thoughtful "My father died when I was young, while deployed, and my mother followed soon after when a fucking asshole decided it would have been a great idea to drive a semi while drunk,"
"I'm sorry for your loss."
"It's fine, you couldn't know, and I made my peace with it a long time ago," I said with a shrug, turning back towards the water to hide a yawn, hearing the old man next to me mutter to himself.
"…Eh, why not? What's one more anyway," the man said before turning towards me with a smile on his face. "Say, just to sate this old man's curiosity, what would you do if the cancer went away for good?"
"Well, I could say the ever classical do everything that I couldn't before, see the sights, explore the world, maybe even fall in love," I said with a snort. "But in all honesty, the first thing I would do is make some Boozy hot chocolate, sit on my couch with my dog and rewatch the harry potter movies without my fucking body attempting to kill me for lying down in the wrong way."
"Well, at least you are honest," he said with a laugh and with a weird glint in his eyes. "Honest is good; I like honest people. They make things remarkably simple."
"I don't have a lot of time in this world, old man. The simpler and faster I make things for me then, the better it is."
"Still, would you take it, if you had a chance, any chance to be free of your cancer no matter what you had to do to achieve it"
I thought about it for less than a second. After all, who wouldn't want to keep on living?
I turned towards the old man with a shiver, the air had gone colder all of a sudden, and the air started to smell like Ozone. "Yeah, I'd take that chance," I said, watching as a smile began to appear on his face.
"Perfect, a deal is a deal after all", and with too big a smile for a man and a snap of his fingers, the world changed, and my life would never be the same.
.
.
.
I could immediately feel that something had changed. The aches and sores I had been living with for the last couple of years had disappeared, lifting a weight from my shoulders that I didn't even know I was carrying.
I took my first deep breath in years, delighting in the easiness of the action, before sneezing immediately as the dusty air of wherever I was hit my nostrils.
I opened my eyes and looked around the room I had found myself in.
It was a dusty wooden room; it wasn't too big, just a bed with a desk pushed underneath a window and a wardrobe on the side.
I rose from the bed, throwing away the covers and started to move around the room, happy at the ease of it all, when I finally noticed the mirror on the wall, and the familiar-looking stranger staring at me reflected on the surface.
"Is this really me?" I thought, tracing the sharp angles of my face, my hands hovering over the stubble covering my cheeks and my head once more full of hair, the blond strands falling over my face for a second before I pushed them away
"I got fucking hair again?" I thought with a laugh, tugging slightly at them to prove they were real. "Never gonna cut these, I swear."
"I see you are enjoying my gift" I turned at that, startled to hear someone else in the otherwise empty room, seeing the old man from before leaning on the wardrobe, his staff looking longer, more gnarled now, looking like the castoff branch of a tree than the walking stick it was before.
The eyes, the branch, the air of mystery around him. The question came ready to me.
"Are you Odin?"
"AH", he replied with a laugh and a chuckle. "You won't believe how many people ask me that. No, I am not Odin, I just like to steal his look from time to time, compliments my missing eye, you see," he said, removing his eyepatch to reveal a gaping void where his right eye was supposed to be, stars flitting around it like a miniature copy of the night sky.
I don't know for how long I stared at it before he put on the eyepatch again, looking slightly contrite as he did so. "Forgot about the effects that that thing had on the non-walkers."
"Bit of advice, kid, next time you make a deal with someone, make sure you know what you are getting into first; not all are like me."
"So, how did you do this? How did you fix me? Where are we even?" I said in one breath, watching him chuckle as he grabbed his cane and hit me lightly on the head with it.
"Calm down, young man, there is time after all, but to answer your questions, I am near-omnipotent, through omnipotence, and the leaky cauldron."
"Wait… Are we in Harry Potter? What? How?" I asked, still incredibly confused
"Through Omni-"
"-potence, it's going to be a recurring theme for this thing, isn't it?"
"Well, if something isn't broken," he said with a smirk.
"Then why fix it. Fair enough; still, I have to ask, why me? I mean, I am not going to complain. I am happy that you chose to save me, but still, why, why would you even care if you are omnipotent?"
"Well, why do you choose to be a good person when you play a video game?"
"Well, it makes me feel good, of course."
"Then why do you think I would not do the same?"
"Fair enough, still, why? I can think of a thousand ways to help people with omnipotence; why this?"
"I am exceedingly bored, child... I have lived for a long time now. Those thousands of ways you are thinking about? I have done a quintillion more, and though lesser, I've still done more evil than you can possibly think of, and despite having done all of it, I am still bored."
"This is what I've been doing as of late to entertain myself, watching people fight on and walk through the pathways they've only learned through the pages of a book or through the lenses of a screen, glimpses of other realities carried forth by the aetherial currents of the omniverse to those you know as authors, written and distorted by their own biases and even further changed by the remaining populous."
"I simply cannot get bored of this; been doing it for a thousand years now and still going strong," he said with a shake of his head.
"And that's where I come in," I said, prompting a nod from him.
"Correct, normally I would go with the classics, age you down a bit, play around with the timeline and insert you as an orphan right as your Hogwarts letter arrives…" he said, raising his hand and snapping his fingers.
"But this time-"
And
"-I've decided-"
The
"-On something-"
Knowledge
"-A bit-"
Poured
"-Different."
IN.
I could feel it, memories of a life half-remembered burning through my mind like fire through dry grass, etching patterns of skills where none were before, Wand movements never known before crammed into my mind until they were almost second nature, basic magical theory and spells carved into my memories until I was sure I would never forget it.
It took maybe a second to happen, but the pain made it feel like hours.
I rose up my head, looking at the not-so-contrite expression of the god right before me. "Well, now that that small kerfuffle is done with, we can get to the details," he said with a shrug, pointing at the table and summoning sever books on top of it.
"I wish for you to become the defence against the dark arts teacher at Hogwarts, don't worry about qualifications or interviews; with the memories I've implanted, you should have no issue teaching up to the NEWT year, and I've already filed the proper paperwork for you."
"Do that for me for… let's say, 6 years? and I'll consider the debt repaid," he said, moving his hand forward almost to grasp mine
"Do we have an agreement?"
And what could I do but grasp it?
"We do"
"Perfect," he said with a smile with way too many teeth. "Oh, by the way, before I go, I may send you a quest or two from time to time; got to stay entertained after all, nothing you cannot theoretically handle anyway, I assume…I hope… eh, you'll be fine," he said with a dismissive wave of his hand, summoning a portal behind him with a snap of the other, disappearing inside it in the blink of an eye.
I was left alone in the room, the sounds from the outside finally filtering in, a far too human noise compared to the eerie silence from before, which only now I had noticed.
I heard a thud and turned around towards the desk as a pouch landed on it.
I opened it, looking at the shining gold coins inside, and at the small folded piece of parchment, which only read Initial Funds.
Clink, Clink, Clink.
I turned towards the window, looking on as an owl tapped on it with its Beak, showing off a letter tied to its leg.
HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY
Headmaster's Office
Hogwarts Castle
Scotland
July 7th 1992
Arthur Smith
Leaky Cauldron 3rd floor, first room to the right
London
Dear Arthur Smith,
We are delighted to extend to you an offer of employment as a professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Your exceptional knowledge and expertise in the defense against the dark arts subject have impressed our esteemed faculty, and we believe that your presence will greatly contribute to the education and growth of our students.
At Hogwarts, we pride ourselves on fostering an environment of academic excellence, magical discovery, and personal development. As a member of our esteemed faculty, you will have the opportunity to inspire and guide young witches and wizards on their magical journey, nurturing their talents and imparting invaluable wisdom.
Enclosed within this letter, you will find your official Hogwarts acceptance contract, which outlines the terms of your employment, including salary, benefits, and responsibilities. Please review this document carefully and return a signed copy to us no later than the 25 of July, indicating your acceptance of the position, as well as a list of the desired coursebooks.
Your arrival at Hogwarts is eagerly anticipated. The start of the academic year is scheduled for September 1st, and we kindly request your presence at the staff orientation on August 31st. During the orientation, you will be introduced to your fellow faculty members and familiarised with the school's curriculum, facilities, and administrative procedures.
If you have any questions or require additional information before your arrival, please do not hesitate to contact us. We are more than happy to assist you in any way we can.
Once again, congratulations on your appointment as a professor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. We look forward to your valuable contributions to our esteemed institution.
Yours sincerely,
Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
"Welp, 90% sure this was either made by McGonnagal or it's a simple template; I can't really see Dumbledore writing this," I muttered, holding the rough parchment in my hands and turning it around in my hands before setting it down on the table and grabbing the pouch, counting the coins inside only to come up with an even 100 Galleons, which, while nice didn't really tell me much since the Economy made no sense in the books "Then again, if a Wand is about 7 galleons it should last me for a while," I thought, tying the pouch to my inside pocket so it was safe and secure.
I looked at the door, patting the coins in my pocket before letting out a sigh. "Fuck it, might as well," and so I got up, grabbed the brown coat by the window and headed out, ready to face this new world I found myself in.