Marine Offensive Slows Down!
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The navy HQ has released a statement admitting that unexpected developments may cause slight delays in the peacekeeping mission to reestablish order in the Kingdom of Jakka.
Astute readers will no doubt remember that the bloodthirsty revolutionary army had occupied the island resort two weeks ago on the pretext of saving innocent civilians from oppression. This claim is obviously as spurious as it is false, proven by how thousands of refugees accepted the marine corps' kind offer to relocate to a safer location. Food and lodgings were generously provided by several of our illustrious World Nobles, though due to logistical limitations, only women and children were given the option. It is noteworthy that none of them refused the offer.
This humanitarian corridor wasn't opened a moment too soon as the Revolutionary Army, once pushed to the brink by Vice Admiral Dalmatian's Poodle Brigades, counterattacked when a sudden storm swept over the marine camp, soaking the majority of the gunpowder just as the artillery had been about to blow the rebels to smithereens. Unfortunately by some quirk of fate, the storm missed the rebel base completely, leaving their ammunition untouched and ready for use.
Furthermore, the desperate Revolutionary Army had press ganged the locals into their combat force, using ill-trained and ill-equipped men as cannon fodder to throw into the meat grinder that were the marine trenches. While only a few dozen rebel casualties could be confirmed, the true number of dead and wounded is very likely much higher. The marines reported no losses on their side.
Reports say that the marines made the valorous decision to advance backwards before being forced to slow down their offensive due to having outrun their supplies. Shocked by the rapid gains on the ground, the rebels retreated forwards in a disorganized mess, stumbling past abandoned supply depot after supply depot in their haste to get to defensive positions.
In response to recent developments, the marine high command has decided to dispatch Vice Admiral Aramaki to the front with additional reinforcements to speed up the pace of the offensive beyond a crawl. This will be the first time the newly enlisted Vice Admiral will be seen on the front lines in the ever present fight against the encroaching darkness. We look eagerly forward to his no doubt stunning performance.
This was Marineford Daily reporting.
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