Ranger pressed the button that would illuminate his watch and sighed. Still nine minutes until the alarm. Giving up, he tossed aside the covers and went to the bathroom to relieve himself. In deference to the cooler temperatures he'd slept in a t-shirt along with his boxers. Peeling out of both, he showered, shaved and got ready for the day.
He hadn't slept well, but it wasn't because of the accommodations. Half of the top floor of Hawkins Protective had sleeping quarters which opened onto a common kitchen and living area. The four bedrooms were set up like a hotel room, but smaller since there was only one very comfortable queen sized bed. The rest was the same including an ensuite bathroom.
Meant for temporary use, the room keys were held by the shift supervisor who logged out keys on request. The setup was handy when staff was stretched thin or time was short and they needed a quick break. All hands on deck in a crisis, half the crew down with the flu, crew stranded due to weather; Ranger could think of multiple ways this set up would be useful for those employees that didn't live on site and didn't have time for a commute. It could even be used in a pinch for protecting a client when there was no safe house available. He'd have to think about putting something similar in one of his other offices, if he could direct his mind away from Stephanie long enough to focus on work.
She was all he'd thought about last night. What they'd had. What he'd lost. How it went wrong and what he should've done instead. The things he'd change if he could go back in time.
Time was, those things were all that Ranger could think about but over the years, as her absence dragged on, the realization had set in that she wasn't coming back so he stopped planning for it. Stopped thinking of what he'd say when he finally saw her, though he'd had it all worked out. And yet. He sighed again. And yet he hadn't said a single thing that he'd meant to last night.
When Stephanie left, she'd told him not to look for her, though she'd used the term stalking, and he hadn't. It went completely against his nature but he'd held back. That hadn't stopped him from keeping an ear out, though. After all, there was a difference between actively searching for intel and happening to hear some gossip.
Mostly the difference was that waiting on the possibility that maybe someone might happen to mention something about her that may or may not be true was far less satisfying than going out and hunting the info down himself. What little gossip had come his way had gone unverified, since pinning it down would fall under the prohibition on stalking. Those tidbits of information could have been outright fairy tales, especially the rumor that she had married. All this time, he'd hoped that one was wrong. But last night he'd seen for himself that she was wearing a wedding and engagement ring.
When she'd stormed off, the implication had been that minding his own business meant Steph would return faster. But she hadn't returned at all, not even to see her family, though that wasn't really too surprising. She and her mother were more likely to clash than talk, her father was basically a non-entity, and her sister took after her mother.
Her grandmother was a different story. That was the family member she'd keep in touch with. Ranger was certain that Edna Mazur and Stephanie never lost contact. Yes, he could have checked but he didn't. He'd given his word. Edna's funeral was the one time that he knew for certain that Stephanie had come back and someone had to have told her Edna passed. Mary Lou, maybe? He still didn't know. Not that it mattered.
If he had a do-over? That would be one of the things he'd change, because staying hands off hadn't worked. Of course, if he had a second chance, he'd do all he could to stop her from leaving in the first place.
Since he'd be shadowing Nate "Hawk" Hawkins today, Ranger dressed in his standard black cargo pants, boots, utility belt and a long-sleeved polo shirt. It was a relief to set aside the Uptown Corporate clothes for a day and get back to the real Ranger. Stifling a yawn, he tucked his phone and tablet into his pockets, grabbed his parka in case they went on a call, then headed out down the hallway.
He'd noticed that all of the employees here routinely used the elevator. Opening the door to the stairwell, he made a mental note to encourage everyone to take the stairs instead. Maybe a contest using fitness trackers. That had worked well in Atlanta. As he jogged down, he was glad his knee wasn't complaining yet, but the day he'd need to take the elevator when he had to go up was drawing near. He'd call the doctor after he got home and get that procedure scheduled. Right now, he had to get his head in the game.
It was precisely 0500 when Ranger stepped onto the second floor where the control room was located. Every Hawkins Protective policy and procedure document was loaded onto his tablet. They'd been reviewed as part of the due diligence prior to the purchase. Today was all about a live audit of those procedures.
Shift change wasn't until 0600, so he'd be able to observe end of shift duties for the night crew, the handover to day shift, and day shift's adherence to procedure. He'd also be observing Hawk's management style. Hawk may have been bumped from CEO and owner to Regional President and General Manager, but that new position came with a probationary period.
The floor had the subdued hum that Ranger recognized as a handful of people working an uneventful shift. Good. Off to one side was a table covered in an oversized holiday tablecloth with a tiny Christmas tree on one side. Last night, the table had been packed full of dishes as the outgoing swing shift and the incoming night shift had shared a Christmas Eve potluck dinner. The remnants of their feast consisted of half a bowl of pretzels and three cans of diet soda. He was pleased to see that the area had been cleaned up.
He dropped his coat in Hawk's office then went to the main control area. As he exchanged greetings with Rangeman's newest employees, he heard the ding of the staff elevator. A quick glance confirmed that Hawk had arrived and they nodded at each other. Technically, he wasn't needed for this part but from what Ranger had seen so far, he and Hawk shared a strong sense of responsibility for everyone under their command. Hawk was here to watch the watcher, as it were. Ranger could respect that.
Day shift started arriving at 0530, laden with baked goods and breakfast dishes. Someone got the waffles and the toaster from the breakroom, added a brand new jug of syrup and real butter, and set up a waffle station on a credenza next to the table. Ranger put enough on his plate to show he was partaking in their custom, but not enough to need extra gym time. As he ate and mingled, he observed everyone around him. So far, even with the distraction of socializing and dining, everything was being done by the book.
Eventually, the shift change was done and new faces were at the monitors or on desk duty. Those on patrol were assigned vehicles and left. The breakfast bar had been cleaned up, but anything that hadn't been eaten remained for snacking. Surprisingly, at least to him, all of the waffles were gone. Ranger and Hawk were on the control floor, discussing details of the branding change.
Ranger heard a sound similar to the one made by the staff elevator and glanced that way. Then Widget, one of the younger men, and one of the few here with a nickname, spoke with the smooth cadence of customer service and Ranger realized that someone had rung the bell downstairs at the client entrance. He wondered what could bring someone here in person on Christmas morning. Any customer would have called or hit an alarm. They wouldn't have driven. If it wasn't a customer, then who would it be?
Whoever it was replied and the sound made Ranger's head snap over to stare at Widget's workstation. He had to be hallucinating. This was some kind of leftover mental state from fretting about her all night. Without thinking, Ranger stepped away while Hawk was mid-sentence and came up behind Widget to look at the monitor.
Madre de Dios. It was her. He wasn't imagining things. It was Stephanie, here in person and smiling at him, with a Santa hat perched at a jaunty angle on her head.
Welcoming phrases such as "I'm pleased to see you", "Thank you for coming", and "I'm so glad you're here", rattled around in his brain but somehow none of those made it out. One eyebrow raised, and he heard himself say, "Babe?"
"Hi, Ranger." Her smile slipped a little as she held the baking dish toward the camera. "I brought cinnamon rolls."
Ranger couldn't describe the feeling that was rolling through him. It was warm and buoyant, like floating in the waters off South Beach in the summer sun. Was this what hope felt like?
Widget, his finger over the elevator control, gave Ranger a questioning look. Ranger barely moved his head before Widget hit the button. Apparently, the car was already down at garage level because Ranger immediately heard the ding through the monitor as the doors opened.
Ranger said, "See you in a minute," then the screen went blank.
Everyone on the floor turned to watch as the elevator doors opened on the second floor, making Stephanie's entrance feel like a big reveal in a play. She stood unmoving for a moment, taking in the audience, then came forward. Ranger couldn't read her as well as he used to, but could see that she was nervous but determined. There was something else in her eyes that he couldn't identify.
He noted the festive holiday outfit which signified that this was intended as a social call. The proffered treats showed intent to participate in the potluck breakfast that he'd mentioned. He also noted the complete lack of adornment on either hand.
His first thought was that she'd come here as an olive branch, reaching out to reestablish a friendship. Maybe in time they could … Stop it, Manoso, he chided himself. Take this slowly. Dios knew he'd missed her and he'd be willing to talk, to see if they could clear the air and become friends once more. At the very least, even if they never saw each other after this, maybe they could get closure. Well, he amended, he could get closure. He had no idea if she wanted or even needed that.
But the lack of rings made him pause. Was she looking for something physical, perhaps under the guise of "for auld lang syne", and she'd removed her wedding rings in order to, what? Hope he hadn't seen them last night and didn't know she wasn't available? Make it easier for each of them to forget that she had a husband waiting at home? She'd be disappointed if that was her plan.
Ranger had moved toward her as he conducted his assessment, meeting her near the buffet table.
"Here, let me."
Ranger took the dish from her and set it amongst the remains of breakfast. Without thinking, he put his hand on the small of her back and escorted her over to the main work area. Everyone watched curiously, giving her polite smiles and nods.
"Let me introduce you." Ranger started with Hawk as the next highest ranking person in the room and ended with Widget. "And this is Stephanie –"
Dios. What was her last name now? He had no idea of her husband's name, first or last, and didn't know if she'd taken his name or kept her maiden name. And how would it look when he didn't know the name of the woman he was introducing. What a great way to make an impression on the new employees.
Stephanie, thankfully, jumped in the moment he paused, as if she'd been planning to introduce herself. It sounded as if they'd spoken over each other, and no one seemed to have noticed his hesitation.
"Stephanie Plum. Please call me Stephanie or Steph." She looked pointedly at the table and smiled ruefully. "I take it that I'm late to the party?"
Guthrie, a tall slender man in his late thirties, kidded her. "What's two hours among friends?"
Reynolds, the only woman on duty this shift, and Lockheart were already checking out the cinnamon rolls.
"Oh," said Reynolds, grabbing a plate and a fork. "Somebody likes glazed pecans as much as me."
Lockhart poked her with his elbow. "You like anything with sugar."
Evans and Carillo joined them and soon everyone had a cinnamon roll. A few of them had seconds from the rest of the dishes. They took their plates back to their stations, while Ranger, Stephanie, and Hawk stood in their midst. As they ate there was small talk about the weather, the holiday, plans for New Year's and resolutions. The mood was pleasant and friendly.
Once the food disappeared, Lockheart and Evans did clean up and Steph quietly asked Ranger for a moment alone. He'd been waiting for this, wondering how this would play out, and still unsure of her motives.
"Hawk, we'll need to borrow your office for a moment."
Ranger didn't wait for a reply as he led Steph to the office in question. He closed the door, but left the blinds on the window up. She sat in one of the armchairs in front of the desk. Instead of sitting behind the desk in a position of distance and authority, Ranger sat in the other chair. They were angled toward each other, their knees so close that he imagined he could feel her body heat, unlikely as that was. Since this was her show, he waited for her to begin. He could tell her nerves were high by the way she was rubbing her hands together and swallowing hard a couple of times.
After clearing her throat she spoke slowly. "I don't know how to say this. It was all so clear in my head when I pictured it but now that we're here it's all jumbled and I can't remember it all." She looked sad, her eyes flicking around the room and avoiding his.
That used to mean that she didn't want to tell him something, either because she wasn't sure how he'd react, or because she knew for certain he wouldn't like what she had to say. He knew what she meant about her thoughts scattering, because he had the same issue last night and again right now.
"Start with something simple," he suggested, then asked the question that was foremost on his mind. "What made you show up here?"
This time her gaze was steady, but she was staring over his shoulder, still not meeting his eyes as she said, "I miss you and I don't want to lose you again."
"Lose me? Is that what you call walking out on me? On us?" The words popped out before Ranger could stop himself. He clenched one hand as he reined in his emotions. Recrimination was not the way to reconciliation.
Her eyes had finally darted to his face but only for a second before she dropped her head and stared at his knees.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to –" Ranger shifted uneasily in his seat. "Are you saying that you'd like us to stay in touch?"
Stephanie nodded to his knees, or possibly his shoes. He wasn't quite certain where she was looking.
Ranger pointed to her bare left hand. Keeping a neutral tone, he asked, "And what does your husband think of you getting reacquainted with your former," he hesitated before going with, "friend?"
She blushed at that and finally looked him the face, her expression rueful. "No husband. The rings help keep unwanted attention away. Though there's a surprising subset of creeper that are attracted by them."
That was an answer he hadn't considered. Still, he had to clarify. "I heard you married an architect. Divorced?"
She shook her head. "Engaged for a while but eventually we called it off."
So, the rumor mill got that one wrong. Another reason to regret not following up, even if it was only by examining the paper trail. Dammit, he should've kept her under surveillance. Wait, no. No, he shouldn't have. That was the cause of half their fights as it was. She'd explicitly demanded no eyes on her, no scrutiny of any kind. It didn't matter that the edict made him unsettled. It was what she had wanted and he had respected her wishes.
"I'm sorry it didn't work out." He meant it, too. Just because she wasn't with him, it didn't mean that he didn't want her to be happy. Unsure how much leeway she'd give him for gathering info, he hesitated with a question on the tip of his tongue. Considering it was something he might ask any acquaintance after a long absence, he gave voice to it. "May I ask what happened?"
The architect better not have laid a hand on her or Ranger would be tempted to give the man a long overdue lesson on how to treat people.
Stephanie gave a half-shrug. "No drama, if that's what you're thinking. No shouting matches, with waving arms and lots of obscene hand gestures, like with Morelli." She gave him a wry look. "No clamming up or silent mode like someone else I know."
"We were –" She paused looking for the right word, "– comfortable. Eventually we realized that was all we were. We didn't have that extra spark, that romantic glow. So, we amicably parted ways. We've stayed friends of sorts. Exchange Christmas and birthday cards. If I needed something, I could call him. If it was something he could help with, he would, and he knows I'd do the same."
Taking a deep breath, Stephanie put her hands on her legs, just above the knee, gripping tightly enough that the tips of her fingers turned white. "You and I had that type of relationship once. I hope we could have it again."
"Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul –" the quote came to mind, though it had been years since he'd read Dickinson, and he finally had a label for that lightness pervading him.
"I would like that as well," Ranger admitted.
Steph turned her head to look out the office window to the control room, then looked back at him. The white puff ball at the end of the Santa hat slid across the neck of her sweater and got stuck in a sequin, but she didn't seem to notice.
Was she trying to see if anyone was watching them? Looking for a clock to check the time? Fidgeting like the Stephanie of old? Ranger wasn't sure. He knew the others hadn't so much as looked this way because he was positioned for the best view. He was about to speak but she beat him to it.
"I don't have a game plan but how about we tip-toe into this?" She brushed a phantom wisp of hair from her face, a nervous habit he recognized.
"Okay," Ranger agreed. "But first, perhaps we should sit and talk. It might be best to clean up the past before we can build a future. Give us a solid foundation to rebuild."
Steph locked her gaze onto his. "I agree. But, will you listen this time?"
His eyes stayed on hers as he nodded. "Yes. Will you?"
"I'm hoping to have a productive discussion." She gave a half smile. "That's something I learned from Kevin."
"Kevin?" Ranger scoured his memory for that name. Frowning, he asked, "The giraffe?"
A genuine laugh escaped her and the sound of it made his heart soar.
Still chuckling, Steph clarified. "The architect."
"Ah." Ranger shared a smile with her. "That makes much more sense."
"Um, I think that for the moment, I would prefer to have our discussion someplace public," she suggested. "Less likelihood of me falling into old habits, like making a scene instead of talking things out."
Since that would also thwart their tendency to get physical instead of working things out, Ranger agreed. Sensing that the visit was coming to an end, they both stood. Steph suggested they meet at one of the museums which was apparently well-known for a special exhibit every Christmas. That seemed fine with him. They exchanged numbers as they set the date and time.
"Hawk and I will be doing meet and greets with the company's biggest clients this week and next." said Ranger. "Tomorrow at 10:00 should be fine but I'll text you to confirm."
Steph perked up and gave him a ghost of her wicked grin. "So, Uptown Ranger will be back?"
He grinned back. "Polished and in-person."
His smile faded as he examined her face. Dios, he had missed her. His hand came up, his fingertips gliding featherlight across her skin as he also brushed back that phantom lock of hair. Her cheeks flushed pink and her breathing was heavier. Slowly, he dropped his head as she lifted her hers and their lips met with a delicate touch like the whisper of a butterfly's wing. His heart was hammering in his chest.
Very conscious of their surroundings, and the bed that was just two floors up, he pulled back with an effort. He could see the same desire and reluctance to part in her eyes that he felt. Public meetings were a very wise idea, he admitted, if they wanted to break their old patterns.
With that, he escorted her back to the elevator. This time, he didn't dare put a hand on her, not even for a hug, for fear that his resolve would break. Ranger had Widget bring up the parking area in the monitor to make sure she got to her vehicle. After that, it was back to business with the promise of their next meeting in the back of his mind all day.