2Random two-shot (?) that was in my mind.
New Eridu
Wise is walking through the streets of New Eridu. It's not long though before he's stopped by someone.
"Hey, you're Wise, aren't you?" A man is speaking to him.
"Um, yeah." Even though him and Belle have been through a lot so far, he's surprised that someone knows who he is. "I'm sorry, do I know you?"
"No, but I know who you are."
"Okay..." The hair's standing up on the back of Wise's neck.
The man then pulls out a newspaper from a stack of them, holding one up for Wise to see. It's extremely surprising that newspapers still exist in this day and age, but there must still a lot of older people that like them. "Yeah, you're in the paper!"
"Really?" That's gotten his attention. "Can I see?"
The man happily says, "Sure!" He then holds out the paper, before taking it back. "200 Denny."
"What is this, a shake down?"
The man then shrugs, "Sorry pal, we all gotta make money. As a businessman, you understand. Rriiiight?" The man has a Cheshire-like grin on his face.
"Just business, huh..." Wise grumbles in a low tone, while pulling out his wallet. Carefully counting the exact amount, making sure to first count out any coins he has first, Wise then dumps it into the newspaper salesman's greedy hands. While the man happily hums while making sure it's all there, Wise flips through the paper to where the guy was talking about. When Wise does, his mouth falls open.
There's an article in the newspaper entitled, Wise: New Eridu's most desirable bachelor! In Belle's words, this article glazes Wise pretty hard. While most of it is pretty over-the-top, there is a prideful side of Wise that likes what's being said about him:
Owns his own (successful) business - "True."
Smart and tech-savvy - "I... yeah."
Cute, handsome, good-looking - "Well," Wise commented, blushing slightly, "I guess that's one way to put it." They forgot 'modest'?
Despite his weak, frail, spindly appearance, "I feel attacked", and in constant need of protecting, he would fight to protect his loved ones as well. He also doesn't have any toxic masculinity or hang-ups that you find with many other men, being pretty much drama-free. "What an odd thing to say."
Wise doesn't talk too much, but he is a good listener. "Huh?"
Family-oriented. Just ask his dear, sweet, sister! "Wait a minute..."
Now it's all coming together.
Husband rating: 12/10. Note: the rating may be off by 1 due to personal bias. "Well, at least they're honest."
All in all, not bad. The last line of the article is the most concerning, though:
What are you waiting for, ladies? You'd better act fast before he gets scooped up! Wise snorts at that last comment, almost like he's helpless, and wouldn't have any say in things?
That's when Wise notices where the article is placed in the newspaper. It's in the section that's all about satire, meant to be silly fun to lighten up people's day. That would mean that it's not meant to be taken seriously. Wise chuckles to himself. "Who'd believe any of this?"
"W-well..."
Wise had forgotten that the newspaper seller was still standing there. Looking at the man, Wise can see the guy's face has gone pale as he looks past Wise. This makes Wise gulp but not turn around. "They're right behind me, aren't they?" Wise can smell perfume.
The newspaper salesman nods rapidly. Sensing danger, he packs up his entire shop, before running away. "If you survive, tell your friends about me!"
Not gonna happen.
But turning around slowly, Wise tries to calm the crowd. "Ladies, I-"
"There he is!"
"Okay, time to go!"
Wise then runs off, as far as those noddle legs of his can take him...
Random Play
Wise has made it safely to the business he and Belle own. Speaking of which, his sister's sitting in a swivel chair in the center of the shop when he busts in. Hearing him, Belle turns to face him, dramatically.
"Welcome, Mr. Wise. I've been expecting you." Belle's got Inky sitting in her lap, petting the cat while talking to Wise. That's when Belle takes a good look at her brother. His clothes are almost rags on him, having been shredded by something, or someone. His jacket's missing too. And he's got lipstick marks all over his face and neck. His phone and wallet are gone, no doubt taken by girls who want to use them as leverage, held hostage in order to make him come back for them. "Wow, they really did a number on you, huh?"
Out of breath, Wise exclaimed, "Do you know what's going on out there?!" He tries to compose himself, going over to a window, and peeking out through one of the blinds. "I managed to slip past everyone, sticking to the side alleys. The guys are outside running defense for me, but I don't know how long that will last..." All of the male Agents from every Faction have formed a blockade outside, trying to protect their boy Wise from harm. He then turns back to Belle, annoyed. "You've really done it now. Why did you have that article written?"
Belle blinked, innocently. "What, I thought it'd be fun." She the waggles an accusatory finger at him. "After all, this is because of you rizzing every girl you meet. It may have cost a bit, but it's worth every Denny."
"Go touch grass."
Belle then looked around Random Play. "Speaking of which. Fairy, how is the online drama going?" A mechanical AI voice then responded.
"Excellent, Master! All 1,234,567,890 bot accounts are currently spreading misinformation and arguments online."
Belle purred, happily. "Good, good. Nice round number."
Wise has had enough. "Belle..." he says through gritted teeth.
Another innocent look from his sister. "Yes?"
There's a dramatic few moments of silence before Wise speaks.
"...this is the greatest gift you could have given me. Thanks!" He even flashes her a thumbs up.
Belle laughs, nodding. She coos, "Yeah, you're not so innocent, are you?"
"Nah." These two are in for a lot of trouble when everything gets sorted out, but they might as well enjoy the ride while they can.
And now, to escalate the situation. Belle speaks into a microphone next to her, that connects to the loudspeakers hanging on the outside of the shop. Another costly, but useful purchase. "Ladies, Wise is in here! We're also running a special: every video purchase today increases your chance of getting Wise!"
Somehow.
The effects were instantaneous. Giddily, Wise peeks back outside, seeing a crowd fighting their way to the shop. "Oh man! They broke through the perimeter! I wish I could fully describe everything happening!" He then turns back to Belle. "You're the best, Sis!"
She flashes him a thumbs up. "See you later, if you survive, Bro!"
The front door to the shop blows open, as light pours in. Wise walks to the entrance, then turns around with his back facing it. He sighs deeply and hold his arms out as far apart as possible. "Alright ladies, I'm all yours."
A pair of hands, from different women, then grab him by the ankles, dragging him outside. He screams, "Nooooo!", but it's only for show.
Deep down, Wise loves ever second of it.
Best part is, that this is timeless. Re-read this every time a new female agent drops.
Soooo... who wins Wise?