Chapter 39: A Lady's Farewell

Dear Mum and Dad,

When you find this letter in my room, you shall discover me gone, and sadly, Roland will have inconsiderately gone with me. Forgive me if my letter is brief and lacking the deep thought one should include in such a sudden farewell, but I cannot waste any time, dear mother and father. The call of the sea is much too endearing for me to avoid any longer. And so I incorporate in this letter my intentions and farewells.

My decision to leave Port Royal and everyone I love in it was not an easy decision. For many an hour, I sat in my room, pondering the possible consequences of leaving the protection and devotion of your loving household. But I realize now, Mum and Dad, this life is not for me. True, you have showered me in undying love and affection since I became your daughter, but it did not allow me to interpret who I was or what I was. I know what I am now, Mum and Dad, and I believe it is about time I convince myself of my true origins, for frankly, the truth is not processing in my head as well as I would hope.

You can probably guess as to what I am going to say next. I am to run off to the sea and Roland will aid me in the voyage. My intentions are to find Jack, for I know he will have the answers to who I am, what I will be, and what I am worth. He is my father, although I do not remember him, and if anyone can understand the dreams I have, then it will most likely be him. I know the search for him will not be an easy one, for his name has died out amongst the area and people are beginning to forget the stories about him. I, for one, shall not forget and I mean to tell him as soon as I find him that he cannot run away from me. I'll spend as long as I need in order to find him, and I promise you and myself that I will not die until I find my true father. But mind you, Daddy, you will forever be my father at heart, and you, Mummy, shall always be my mother. No child has ever been as fortunate as I was to have come under your care. My eyes are already swelling with tears at the thought of leaving you behind without one last embrace.

With Jack lies my destination. That is what I am after, and in spite of the undying love I have for you, my dear loving parents, I shall not tell you any more of what I plan on doing. In fact, I am thinking out my plan as I go which may or may not be a good thing. But fear not, Mum and Dad, I believe I am ready to face such a challenge.

On a different note, I apologize if I ever hurt or burdened you two in any way. I ask for your forgiveness for all the times I have disobeyed you and failed to honor what you have done for me, for it was never my intent to hurt either of you. You raised Roland and me very well, and it is not your fault that I am leaving. I am not angry that you told me I was not your blood daughter. You only provided me with the truth, the answer to all the mysteries and questions that have aroused in my drifting mind. And so I thank you, Mum and Dad, for telling me. It must have taken a lot of courage and love for a parent to tell their child the truth behind themselves. All you have ever been to me were the loving, caring parents that a wild girl like me was fortunate to have. I thank you deeply and everlastingly for the support you gave me and the consistent encouragement to follow my dreams. How I would have loved to hug you and say farewell to your ageless faces, but some things were never meant to be.

Please tell Maggie, Lisa, Peter, and all the other servants of this household, as well as dear wonderful Grandfather, for their thoughtful words of wisdom and advice to me and Roland. I write this partly for Roland's sake, for he is too lazy to write his own letter to you, but I ask of you to please tell these wonderful people that they have been very good helpers and friends to us. I wish them all the best.

Also, I know that Adam and I are not on very good terms, but please tell him and his family that I send my love and that I am again, sorry for the umpteenth time, for what I did to him. If he will not accept my apology, then that is fine. He does not have to do anything for me if he does not wish to. But tell him I love him still and that I hope that he will think fondly of me while I am away. Roland also sends his good-byes to the Locke family, and says that he was very thankful to have a good friend such as Adam to share his adventures with. Also, send my blessings to the Westley family as well. Tell Stephen that I am sorry for the unfortunate incident at the lagoon and that I thank him for bringing me home in my disastrous state. As for Alexandra, tell her I forgive her for all the times she ridiculed me, and Roland means to tell her that she was a good suitor… for a while at least. And finally, send word to the Murrays, for Kenneth and Meredith were good and friendly acquaintances to the both of us.

I love you Mum and Dad. I send my own, more meaningful blessings to you and Grandfather. And alas, if I do not return, please think kindly of me, and my wish is that you will understand. Farewell, Mother, Father. The sea has finally called my name, and thus comes my opportune moment.

Love, love, love, with much love,

Your daughter,

Astrid Jacqueline Turner Sparrow

And, Roland William Turner. I forgot to add his name and now he is angry with me.