28Thank you so much to all of my reviewers! THANK YOU! Disclaimer: The characters and Hogwarts belong to JKR. The main ideas of this chapter belong to cliched02 and HermyGWeasley. So the only thing I own is myself, and about two words of the story. (Sorry to the other people who gave me ideas, they were all great.) Chapter 3: Wish Upon a Pickle
I suppose you think I've tortured poor Harriet enough, right? No? Well, if you say so...
Harriet heads down to breakfast the next day, trying to act as though nothing is wrong. However, this is made difficult by the fact that, once again, most everyone is pointing, staring, and laughing at her. After a while, it is apparent that they aren't getting much joy out of this anymore, and they all go back to their food. I immediately walk over to Draco and whisper something in his ear. He nods, stands up in his seat, and clears his throat.
"I have some important information to share with you," he announces, in a voice that clearly sounds throughout the Hall, "Regarding Harry- sorry- Miss Harriet over here."
He looks over Harriet, and there are a few sniggers from the Slytherin table.
"A few weeks ago, as you know, we all started our classes for the year. On the day that Slytherin and Gryffindors in out year had Potions class together, I decided to go early, simply because I had nothing better to do. But when I got there-" he gives a fake shiver, "-Well, Potter was already there. He- this was before he became Harriet- was standing inside his cauldron, and... he was singing. I think it was some kind of Muggle song... I remember something like 'Where Is the Love'-"
"I love that song!" squeals Hermione Granger from the Gryffindor table. She blushes as everyone stares at her, sinks into her seat, and mumbles, "Never mind."
"It doesn't matter," I tell her, "that was basically all that everyone- er-needs to know. Well?" I round on the students, "What do you have to say about that?"
There are a lot of mumbles of things like, "That's not so bad," and "You obviously haven't met my brother..."
"You people are pathetic!" I cry. I look over at Harriet, grab her arm, and force her out of the Hall. When I finally stop, she grins at me.
"Your plan's not going quite like you planned, is it?"
I grin right back at her.
"You think I don't have a Plan B?" I give an evil chuckle, then call, "Oh, Paula!"
There is a loud pop, and a very beautiful girl appears out of thin air. Harriet starts drooling. I snap my fingers in front of her face.
"You're a girl, remember?" She keeps drooling. "That's disturbing. Anyway, Paula, do your stuff."
Paula nods and starts talking.
"Well, Harriet, I am your fairy godmother. I can grant you any wish, anything you want- my powers are well beyond those of a mere witch or wizard. Tell me- what would you like?"
Immediately, Harriet half-shouts, "I wish I was a boy again!"
Paula raises her wand, and with a little swish, turns into a pickle. (What were you expecting?) I catch her before she hits the ground, and bite her head off. Harriet doesn't say anything. She just stands there with a horrified expression on her face.
"It's Fred and George's newest product," I explain, "Fake Fairy Food. It also comes in Wilma Watermelon, Sarah Strawberry, and about five hundred others. But the best part is," I say, with yet another evil grin, "It comes with an extra 'wand' that can turn any person you want into a pickle- or whichever food you chose." I take the wand out of my pocket. Harriet gives (another) annoying, high-pitched scream, and- of course- I turn her into a pickle, and eat her.
I give an evil chuckle. (Is that getting on your nerves yet?) I walk up to the doors of the Great Hall, and hang up a sign, saying:
Do you want to get out of class?
Or do you just want to play a good prank on your friends?
Well, come to
WEASLEY'S WIZARD WHEEZES
Conveniently located at 93, Diagon Alley
I hang it up so that it's impossible to miss it coming into theHall.
It's the least I can do.
THE END
Really this time. It's over. I ate Harry- How am I supposed to torture him? HOWEVER, I am planning on writing a sequel. I'll tell you when I do. (As of now, I have the first chapter written... but that's about it. And to warn all of you, it's a HP/AF crossover.)