Disclaimer: I do not own any characters or whatnot from Lost. I'm just borrowing.
Summary: One-shot. My thoughts on what Boone's thoughts were near the end of 'Hearts and Minds.'
000
She had died… right in his arms, or so it had seemed.
"There's no blood on you," Locke had observed.
Boone had looked at his arms. The blood of Shannon's lifeless body that had seeped into his shirt and smeared across his skin was gone. There was no trace of Shannon's death. What was going on? "What the hell just happened to me out there?" he asked, trying to comprehend what was happening.
"I don't know. I don't know, you tell me," Locke said calmly in that way he did, pushing Boone off of him. "But your sister, Shannon. . ." He looked over, and Boone followed his gaze. There was Shannon. She was here. She was alive. So what the hell had happened?
"She was dead," Boone said, looking at Shannon in disbelief. She had been dead! He had seen her die, held her in his arms when it happened! How could she be out here, alive?
"It that what it made you see?" Locke asked, curiously.
"What made me see?" Boone tried to think, but his mind was such a jumbled mess, thinking wasn't exactly the easiest thing to do at the moment. What was Locke talking about? Then it hit him. "That stuff you put on my head. . . you drugged me." Had Locke attacked him with a knife just to drug him, or what?
"I gave you an experience that I believe was vital to your survival on this island," Locke said, answering the question in a way only Locke could.
So then… It wasn't… "It wasn't real?" Boone asked, still not completely grasping everything that was going on.
"It was only as real as you made it."
"I saw her die," Boone said. He had seen her die… in his arms… and it had felt so real… Even now, after seeing Shannon alive, it was hard to believe that it hadn't really happened.
"How did you feel? When she died?" Locke asked, looking at him.
Thoughts rushed through Boone's head. The things one should feel when your sister has died in your arms. Sadness. Anger. Shock, disbelief. But Boone didn't choose any of those words. If he had, it would have been a lie. He knew, he knew inside that he should feel those things… She was his sister! She had died in his arms! But he felt none of that. "I felt. . . I felt.. I felt relieved. I felt relieved," Boone finally said, with realization. He felt relieved. He shouldn't… but he did. It was just…. He had gotten so tired of chasing Shannon around, saving her, always being the one she turned to. If she was gone, he would never have to worry about her again. He would never have to think about whether she was suddenly going to call him up, send him halfway across the world to get her out of a jam.
"Yes," Locke said. "Time to let go." He got up and grabbed his bag. "Follow me."
Boone stood up and followed him. It was time to let go, he supposed. He wondered a little if he shouldn't let go so easily, but it had felt so good… So good, the relief he had felt when he thought she was gone. And if this was what was right, then he was going to have to let go.
0000
A/N: Is it completely horrible? Or halfway decent, or what? Please review! Even if you HATE it, please don't flame. Constructive criticism is a million times better. You can tell me I stink, but you can help me get better. Anyway, please review and tell me what you think of it!