Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Lost. All I own is my song. Muahaha!

A/N: This song is to the tune of… Pop Goes the Weasel, sorta, only it's slower. Thanks to my brother (Evil Ethan Fan though he is!) for figuring out the tune. I had it in my head but couldn't figure out where it was from. Well, enjoy!

Summary: A song about 'Ethan Rom'. Big spoilers for 'Homecoming'. Ethan fans won't like it, just to warn you.

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Oh, Ethan, that Ethan I hate with a passion.

How happy I was when you died.

Some people might say I have an obsession,

But I don't get how people could cry.

When you di-ied, when Charlie shot you,

With the gun that used to be Jack's.

When you di-ied when Charlie shot you,

In the front and not in the back.

Now you're gone forever, can't hurt anymore people,

It makes me giddy with glee.

No more killings or stranglings from Ethan,

Doesn't it make you happy?

That evil Ethan killed poor, innocent Scott,

And he kidnapped Claire.

Not to mention that he tried to kill Charlie

That Ethan's now gone just seems fair.

When you di-ied, when Charlie shot you,

With the gun that used to be Jack's.

When you di-ied when Charlie shot you,

In the front and not in the back.

Oh, Ethan, oh, Ethan you're gone forever,

No more trouble from you!

You thought you were smart and oh so clever,

But Charlie still got you, it's true!

Oh, Ethan, that Ethan I hate with a passion.

How happy I was when you died.

Some people might say I have an obsession,

But I don't get how people could cry.

You're gone, gone, gone,

Ethan is so dead and gone!

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A/N: I know all the Ethan Lovers (Insane people, I tell you! Insane!) out there are going to hate this and me for writing it, but I don't care! This just suddenly popped into my head after reading a poem about Mary-Sues (go figure) and I just HAD to write it down! For those of you who AREN'T Ethan fans (praise you all!), I hope you liked it.

Also, please take a moment of silence for dear, dear Scott before you review. Thank you.