77.The snow was lightly falling outside as every window of every shop glowed with the radiance of Christmas. A combination of various Christmas carols blared out from each shop, and each different busker or group of carolers, creating a distorted noise of bells and jolly tunes. Toy shop windows had the mandatory children's faces of excitement and their gloved hands pressed against them. Will and Grace strolled down the street slowly together.
"I'm Jewish…why am I even coming with you to buy your presents? God, I hate Christmas! " Scoffed Grace, warming her hands with the coffee she held.
Will took a deep breath in before sighing while replying with "No you don't. You love Christmas. You're using it as an excuse to get away from your family, and the fact that you are single."
"So not true! We are currently on our merry little way to the mall to buy presents now, aren't we, elf?"
"Only because I lured you out of bed with the offer of shouting you a coffee and lunch… funny thing is, that's all you need to be offered to be lured into bed as well."
Grace hit him, making him wince slightly with the strength of the blow.
"You have your list" she said. "So all we have to do is get in and out of there, right?"
"Right. No stopping. Not for coffee, pretty clothes or the lycra induced performances on the stage. This year, it should only take us approximately one hour, if all goes correctly to plan and schedule." Will sternly answered as they dodged the traffic to cross the road.
"Yes m'am"
The doors of the mall automatically opened, allowing the two friends entry into a colourful, rushed and chaotic environment.
"Karen, Santa is obviously gay, I mean what self respecting straight man wears red velvet with a soft fur trimming?" Jack argued as his fingers designed the large blue bow that he was tying around his current project – Will's present.
"I always thought that he was married?" Karen responded, looking up from her magazine inquisitively.
"No. Oh how wrong we are. That's what he wants us to believe, but in reality, he just lives with her in a sick Will and Grace Style relationship"
"Oh, you know what? That makes a lot of sense now that you mention it. I can see a lot of similarities between the two. Bad fashion and attraction to short people being the main ones."
"Santa would be the ultimate sugar-daddy…think about it Kare…all types of toys, all year round!"
Jack and Karen both looked into the distance, smiles on their faces as they imagined the possibilities. After a few moments of silence, Jack resumed his wrapping and Karen continued reading…with blurred vision of course.
"I love wrapping presents Kare! Good looking presents have a distinct style to them and need to be wrapped for protection." Jack excitedly blurted out, giggling as a dirty thought about 'wrapping other things for protection' popped into his mind.
"It's not all about the presents Jackie. Sheesh!" Karen replied, sitting at her desk. "It's also about feeling completely miserable about being alone and letting the people you hate know how you really feel about them."
"Aww, you're not alone." Jack sympathized.
"Yeah, but you are!" Karen laughed.
Jack searched around his workstation (aka Grace's desk) for the sticky tape. He had been doing all of his wrapping in Grace's office when she wasn't there.
"Hey, where's Grace today?" He questioned.
"Umm sleeping with Will?"
"Ugh, they are so disgusting!" Jack shuddered.
He grinned at the fact that he had actually made an effort to think about his presents for his friends this year, as opposed to every other years present – a head shot of himself. He looked over at his friend as she sat there and concentrated on filing her nails. Raising his eyebrow cheekily, he sauntered across to Karen's desk, causing her to look up suspiciously.
"What?" She asked.
Jack grinned.
"What did you get me?"
Karen smiled, placing her nail file back down on the table. She picked up a red ribbon and tied it around her chest as Jack watched in awe. She stood up and twirled around, showing off her invention as well as her figure.
"You get me and my approval."
Jack's face fell "Is inappropriate fondling included in the package?"
"Naturally" Karen said, slapping Jack on the behind.
His face lit up again. "Well then, that is one of the best presents ever! That red ribbon looks fabulous by the way, you should really consider wearing it without the top and bra underneath."
Karen chuckled as she both she and Jack resumed their positions at the desks.
"Lycra should never be silver…and should never be worn as a full body suit. No matter who you are. Lycra Onesies do not flatter anybody, no matter how hard you try." Will sighed into his third coffee.
Grace snorted. "You should try telling Jack that."
"I have."
They had been sitting at the food court for an hour…all plans of a short visit to the mall had flown through the electronic doors and was now swirling around the frozen streets of New York.
Will rested his cup down on the table he shared with Grace, watching her tear apart a banana muffin.
"What are you doing?"
"I heard that bananas induce nightmares."
"That's ridiculous. Waking up next to Karen is a nightmare. Bananas don't create nightmares!"
Grace pouted as she pushed the serviette with banana-muffin remnants away from her. She looked up at her friend.
"So explain, exactly what is happening on Christmas day?" She asked.
"Well, we get up like normal people, open our presents…just me, you and Jack."
"What about Karen?"
"Oh yeah. Ok, like normal people and Satan's spokesperson."
"And then what?"
"And then we have lunch, just the four of us and then later on we will sit around and have a relaxing night, eating Christmas food."
"And where do the dysfunctional families we belong to come into it?" Questioned Grace.
Will rolled his eyes. "At the new years party we are throwing this year, duh!"
Grace suddenly remembered that her and Will had offered to hold a New Years Eve function themselves this year – Most of their friends and families were invited to attend.
Will rested his face against his palm.
"Gracie?"
"Yeah?"
"If you are anti-bananas at the moment…Why did you order a banana muffin?"
"You wanna know something?" She responded. "I don't even know"