12Unreachable Treasure
A/N : Okay, this takes place after Next but somehow, in some twisted way, Gourry never survived the ordeal with Hellmaster…It's a one-shot story…a very sad one…
The wind was blowing gently, fallen leaves flew past me, the green grass swayed slowly.
The sound of my mantle flapping against the wind and the rustling leaves filled my ears.
One would think that today would be a very wonderful day but that thought is the last thing on my mind right now. I had forgotten how long I was standing on that plain. All I remember was that I've been staring at the sword in front of me all morning. The sword was fully plunged into the large mount of dirt making only the hilt visible to my eyes.
But that was enough. Enough to trigger the past memories; memories of when I lost him…
I didn't want to accept it…even now…
But, looking at the sword in front of me… His Hikari No Ken…
"I…" It was hard to admit it…No, I didn't want to admit it…
Then it happened…
It was so sudden; he appeared out of nowhere…
"I would have thought that the sorceress supreme, Lina Inverse would already have moved on…" His voice was soft but that was enough for me to realize who it was…
With lightning speed, I turned myself so that I could face him. My eyes went wide as my mouth went dried when I saw him; his smiling face. My heart started to beat rapidly at the sight of him. He was the same when he had left me only this time he wasn't wearing any of his armor. My mind was going ballistic but only one thought got through to me; run to him…
But then it came crashing back; the memories…
"T-this is not real! I saw your crystal shattered! You're supposed to be-!" The words just came out as I stared at him with angry eyes. Angry at him for leaving me…. For hurting me like this…
He raised his left hand and stared at it for a while, "…dead?" he finished my sentence before looking back at me, "I am, Lina," the soft tone in his voice never disappeared.
Anger got the best of me when he had finished speaking, "Then how-? Why?" I was already hurt and seeing him again made the pain even worse.
I saw him turned his gaze towards the sword behind me, "Because you won't accept my death. Even though you're standing next to my grave,"
…dead…
…he's dead…
And yet I still won't accept reality…
I lower my gaze feeling somewhat shameful. Silence covered the plains but then the soft sound of someone walking caught my ears. Even though I still had my gaze lowered, I knew that he was walking past me, movingtowards the large mount of dirt.
To my surprised, he let out a chuckle.
"I'm surprised you didn't take my sword,"
"How can I…" I didn't even recognize my own voice.
He turned silent but I could sense that he was smiling sadly. Then, the next thing he said had shocked me.
"It's time you let this go," He was asking the impossible. He knew that I don't want to. I knew that I don't want to.
"I can't!" I didn't mean to snap at him but…
"Lina…" he gently tried to persuade me.
I was starting to get infuriated. Why was he so calm when I had…!
"It's my fault!" I suddenly yelled as my fists tightened, "If only I cast the Giga Slave sooner, you, you would still be-!" I couldn't say it… I couldn't say that he's… "But I screw it up!" My eyes snapped shut as guilt and regret washed over me.
If I hadn't hesitate to save him…
If I had thought about saving him more than saving the world…
I could feel his eyes bore at my back but I didn't react to it.
"But it's not your fault," It annoyed me to no end that he was being so sincere, so honest, so pure…
Even though he would forgive me for what I did, I still can't forgive myself.
"It is damn it!"
He let out a small sigh but then he continued, "Other people would think so but I don't," he said in a tone that usually accompanied with a smile, "I don't blame you, Lina,"
I didn't know what to say. No one has ever been so forgiving towards me, not Amelia, not Zel, and especially not Naga…
But still I can't…
"…you should…" My voice was getting weaker by the minute.
"You know I won't," His reply was instant as he laughed like he used to, "But hey. Maybe it was fate that I would die back th-,"
"Don't you ever say that!" I cut him off before his words could haunt me for the rest of my life, "How can you say that? How can you be so calm when you're already dead?" I voiced out my thoughts in a furious tone as I swirled back to look at him straight in the eyes.
To my surprise, he just smiled at me.
"Finally you admit that I'm dead," he kept on smiling. I was baffled. How can a person saiy such thingswith a smile on their face? Nonetheless, I regretted for bursting out like that. It seems he's getting the best of me whether I like it or not.
Shamefully, I lowered my head again. I said nothing. He said nothing… Silence consumed us once again.
"How," I started to speak. I wanted him to know how his absence was affecting me this much, "How can I move on when I would always know that you're not there beside me anymore…?" It was strange saying it. For me, it would always seem that he would forever be with me like the loyal protector he is. But fate didn't agree with me.
"I would always be with you Lina. Just not physically…" He couldn't hide the hesitation in his voice.
"Don't give me that 'my heart will always be with you' crap!" Anger got the best of me again, but it was entirely his fault. Doesn't he understand?
His face turned into a shocked expression.
"I don't want that!" I continued with gritted teeth, "I want to be able to see you! To touch you! To have the reassurance to know that you're still there at my side!" I felt exposed, weak, but I didn't care. This is all about him. No, about us…
"..Lina.." His voice was soothing but even that won't ease the pain…
I still had my eyes on the ground but moments later, I found myself enveloped in an embrace.
When he embraced me at that moment, I felt nothing…
Because I couldn't feel him anymore…
I couldn't feel his soft blond hair beneath my touch…
I couldn't feel him against me…
All I felt was the vast void of emptiness…
It was like he was never there at all…
Just the mere thought made my breath turned ragged and the pain increased…
"Lina, remember that time when I had said that I would protect you for the rest of life?"
The promise that a small corner of my heart had hoped would come true…
"I'm sorry I can't make it come true…"
It made me wished that I was deaf when he had said it…
I tried to tighten my grip on him. I was afraid…Afraid that if I let go, he would leave me…
"Lina?" I couldn't see his face when he spoke as I was busy trying to get even closer to him even if it felt like embracing hard and compressed air, "…see ya,"
That two simple words halted my actions completely as my eyes turned wide. A whimper escaped my lips…
The next thing I knew, I was trying to hug the empty space in front me. His sudden disappearance made me lost my balance and my knees fell on the soft grass.
"..G-Gourry…?" My hands searched for him frantically, "Gourry?" I didn't notice that my voice started to break. I didn't notice that my body started to shake violently…
Finally, everything started to sink in…
And I couldn't stop the tears from spilling…
I buried my face into my hands in a sad attempt to stop myself from crying…
Countless of tears spilled but it never stopped…
Not the tears…not even the pain…
I had discovered the most important treasure to me…
But when I had finally realized what it was…
It was already too late…
He was already gone…
Oshimai…
Ranting :
Sorry, it wasn't a happy ending…Don't tell me why I'm writing this…Me, an L/G fanatic…I guess I was having an angst moment.
Well, review please!