Category: Liz angst, slight M/L romance.
Disclaimer: Unfortunately, Roswell and all of the characters from the show do not belong to me. "In the End" is by Linkin Park, and all lyrics belong to them.
Author's Note: The first part of this is taken directly from the episode "Harvest." All lyrics are in italics. Parts of this piece take place in the future; note the dates at the beginning of the chapters.
Spoilers: "The End of the World," "Harvest," "Max in the City."
Summary: Liz deals with the aftershocks of her promise to future Max.
Warning: Character death.
*I tried so hard,
And got so far.
But in the end
It doesn't even matter.
I had to fall
To lose it all.
But in the end
It doesn't even matter…*
June 23, 2006
"Liz? Liz, wake up, sweetheart." I opened my eyes slowly. It was early morning, and the sun was just coming up. I rolled over to face the voice and stretched slowly. When my hand came in contact with soft grass, I realized that I had fallen asleep in front of Max's grave.
"Liz?" Alex asked softly. I didn't respond, and after a moment, I felt his fingers touch my sleeve tentatively, as if he were afraid that my pale skin would crumble at the slightest contact. Gingerly, he rubbed my upper arm a few times, and then sank down next to me.
He smiled, but it was also hesitant. "Are you ok?" he asked finally. I nodded and he sighed. "Listen, about the wedding… We, Is and I, maybe we should post—"
"No!" I turned over to face the grave and began to trace the letters engraved on the cold stone. "Don't make that mistake because of me. I couldn't live with myself if someone else's life was ruined because of my actions."
"It's just…" he sighed. "I want you there. And I want you to be happy. But…I also want to marry Isabel, as soon as possible." His voice broke. "I…I love her, Liz."
I sat up and then turned to give Alex a hug. "I know you do," I said softly, "and that's why it isn't fair for you to postpone your happiness because of me."
"Are you really ok?" he asked. I put my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes.
"To be honest? No."
He sighed. "I didn't think so. You want to talk about it?"
"No, not really." I pulled away slightly, and smiled. "I'll be ok. This…it's just hard. You and Is…you are so happy, and I want you to be happy. You deserve to be. But at the same time, it just reminds me of what I'll never have, and all because of a stupid mistake I made a long time ago."
"Liz, even though Max is dead, it doesn't mean that you'll never meet someone new and marry him. You and Maria will both have a lot of children someday. I know it."
I smiled and put my head back on Alex's shoulder. "Don't worry about me. Promise me that you won't, at least not today. It's your day."
"Then you'll come?" he asked.
"Of course. And seeing how the wedding is in…" I glanced at my watch. "Six hours, we'd better get ready."
"Yeah." He stood and then helped me up. We walked back to his car slowly, without speaking.
"Thanks for finding me," I said as he started the car.
He smiled and then carefully guided the car away from the cemetery.
The wedding was beautiful, just as I had predicted, and I have never seen Isabel and Alex so happy. Maria and Michael also looked like they were beginning to rekindle a relationship. I saw them kissing before the wedding began. And as for Kyle and Tess… Well, Kyle let me in on a little secret just before the reception began. He's going to propose to Tess soon, within the next week.
And to tell you the truth, I'm not upset. Sure, I'll be the only one left who's single, but I'll always have my memories of Max. I'll also be the only one who's concerned about the Granalith.
Because though the Skins may have not made any direct contact with my friends for the last five years, they still exist. I'm living proof of that.
Max was right.
Isn't irony funny?
In a small cave, hidden near the entrance to the pods, Liz Parker lies on the floor, exhausted. She breaths in the last of the air that exists in the hell she has been confined to for the past five years. Tears run down her face as she remembers the last night that Max was alive, the night when she told him the truth, the night when they consummated their relationship by sleeping together. She also remembers being kidnapped by a Skin with a face the image of her own, and hearing Max's anguished cries after beating "her" almost to death.
As her eyes close and her lungs contract around poisoned air, Liz smiles, for she knows that soon, very soon, she will be with her beloved.
*Thanks to Avalon, who, without knowing it, helped me to find the true ending to this piece. *