42Hi guys. This is going to be the first non-romance fic that I've ever written…but then again, my sister was the one who came up with the idea so…yeah. It's just basically a fic showing what the people of Tales of Symphonia have on their answering machines, dubbed the Altessa Machine.
But before we get started, the disclaimer! Let's see, who should we pick…? Ah, Colette, if you please.
Colette: What me? Oh all right. Ahem. Drieldwin and her sister, Cherry-sama do not own Tales of Symphoni-aaaaahhh! (trips over backwards) Oops! I think I ripped the disclaimer.
Drieldwin: (face palms-) Colette….
/Lloyd's Answering Machine/
Lloyd: Dad, tell me what this is again?
Dirk: (heard in background) Lloyd, I told you, it's the invention Altessa and I worked on after the Dirk-a-Phone.
Lloyd: So what's it called?
Dirk: It's an Altessa Machine.
Lloyd: What's it do?
Dirk: When someone calls the Dirk-a-Phone when you can't answer it, it leaves a message of what he or she says.
Lloyd: That's all it does? That's not very interesting…
Dirk: You can record a note to tell people to leave a message for when you come back.
Lloyd: Cool! Can I try it out? …What! Ah! It was on all the time when we were talki—?
#BEEP#
Message 1: Um…Hello? Hello? Can you hear me? Lloyd? This is Colette calling. I'm really sorry to bother you right now. I'm sure you're really busy with something. I shouldn't have called; I'm just a bother aren't I? I'm sorry. The reason I called was to thank you for explaining how the Altessa Machine works and um…oh dear…I forgot what else…I'm sorry. I'll go now. (click)
#BEEP#
Message 2: Lloyd! Have you seen that idiot of chosen, Zelos! This is Sheena here. I caught that pathetic pervert spying on me in the shower, AGAIN! If you see him, tell him he is going to suffer the wrath of Sheena Fujibayashi. He will pay! (click)
#BEEP#
Message 3: Hi, Lloyd, this is Genis. I'm calling you because I think I might have to cancel our fishing trip this weekend. I asked Presea if maybe she'd like to go to the Altamira Amusement Park with me. I haven't gotten word back from her yet, so I'll keep you posted. Bye! (click)
#BEEP#
Message 4: Lloyd. This is Kratos. This is a truly interesting device that Dirk and Altessa were able to create. I am calling to remind you that you need to still read that training manual that I gave you. You do need to read it, Lloyd, cause your sword skills really suck. (cough) I mean, you need to become better at your technique. Farwell. (click)
#BEEP#
Message 5: Hello, Dirk. This is Raine calling to congratulate you on creating this marvelous piece of technology. I simply must find out how it works! Maybe I could come to your place sometime and you can show me how it functions. I think I might have accidentally ruined our Altessa Machine by accident and somehow jumbled up the message that Genis and I recorded, so if you could show me how to fix that too, I'd be grateful. (starts to hang up the phone when you can hear Raine exclaim "MARVELOUS" in the background) (click)
Drieldwin: Okay, I hope that didn't sound too weird or anything.
Cherry-sama: Weird? It's supposed to sound weird! (does Raine's ruin-mode laugh)
Drieldwin: Uh…no, it was supposed to be funny...
Genis: You guys have a twisted sense of humor.
Drieldwin: Quiet brat!
Genis: You sound like Zelos.
Drieldwin: Why you! (chases after Genis)
Cherry-sama: (sighs) Anyways. Please review.