-sniffles- It has finally came… the last chapter… My second multi-chapter story to end… at least, I think it's the second…
Warnings: a small amount of Tohma/Suguru (brotherly), hints at future smex, but not written smex… I can't write lemons…. Grammar and maybe Spelling problems. I have re-read this chapter five times...
Disclaimer: -coughs- Gravi is the last thing on my buying list. So, NO, I do not own the anime/manga, or anything in association with it, unless you count the last volume of the manga. I own a copy of that.
Every Star and Just Dreaming was written by me...
Chapter Sixteen, Maybe it Doesn't End After All
GRAVITATION – A Week Later
Sakura checked her nails for the fiftieth time that hour as the editor read over her son's newest release. She couldn't believe that it only took him one week to finish the story, but then again, it was for a good cause. Eiri sat next to her, reading a magazine. He hasn't even twitched, she thought, He must have a lot of faith in that story. A cough interrupted her thoughts and she looked at the editor.
"If you wrote this fast with every book, we would make millions," he commented. "But then again, you might lose your ideas."
"A writer's mind never ends," Eiri pointed out, laying the magazine on the desk. "We can reuse an idea, and the reader may never know."
The man laughed. "I suppose you have to be that great of a writer, eh?" He began shuffling through the stack of papers. "This release will cause controversy, but it will also cause an increase in the money we take in."
"I don't care. I just want it printed."
"And it will be."
Sakura smiled in relief and stole a glance at her son. There was a small smile on his face that she hadn't seen since the singer had broken up with him. Maybe you can start smiling again.
GRAVITATION - Shindou Household
Date: May 24, 2-
Inspiration: Ryuichi singing in the shower
Expression: sad –insert poorly drawn sad face-
Subject: Goodbye Japan
I don't how to react. Like the subject says, we leave for America tomorrow. It will be different, and I'm glad Mom made us take those English classes when we were younger. K and Suguru are the only ones who have ever been there. I'm glad I'm not alone in the nervousness department. Hiro and Tatsuha are too. Ryuichi was complaining how he won't be able to live without Tats. Surprisingly, Tats hasn't said anything about this. I think it helps him not to think about it. Either that or he's too excited about the photography lessons.
Mom and Dad planned a small family party for tonight. We decided that we would spend the last night with our families. Ryuichi wants to spend some of it with Tats. I think he wants to go further in their relationship but something tells me that Tats will say no.
I've been thinking about him again. I can't stop. It still breaks my heart every time the video for "Believe" comes on. I wonder how he took it. He hasn't called or anything. I want him to call. I want to say goodbye. I want him. My brain tells me to forget him but my heart beats to hear his. Do you care anymore? Did you ever? I know you did. Maybe… maybe Kitazawa was the one to kiss you… then it's my fault that we're not together. How many times have I been told those words, though? Too many.
I don't want to leave Japan without saying goodbye but I'm not strong enough to call him. I'll give in to the feelings, to the passion, to… everything.
Until I write again, this is goodbye Journal. You've been with me through the rain… I hope you continue when I get back. Your sister will be with me in America. I hope she helps as much as you do.
- Shindou Shuichi
Shuichi dropped his blue pen and closed the notebook. After putting the lock on it, he stuffed in a drawer and stood up from the desk. As he walked to his bed, a melody started in his head, and began to sing, "I cry for the moments we lost/ I cry for the happiness that won't come back again/ I cry to hear your voice/ And I cry to let you know/ I still love you/ There's nothing that will change that/ I'll remember the good times/ And I'll forget the bad times/ But most of all, I'll cry for you."
"You always write perfect songs when you're sad, Shuichi."
Turning around, Shuichi smiled, "We're alike in that aspect."
Ryuichi walked to the bed and sat down, toweling his wet hair, "Take care of him for me."
"You know I will."
GRAVITATION - Nakano Household
"My baby's leaving me!"
Nakano Shika always prided himself into being a respectable man who never raised his voice to his wife. At the moment, however, he was hoping he could break from that shell. A week ago, Ino was fine with her son leaving for America, but now that it's only a night away, she was having a breakdown. The three Nakano men tried their best to get her to calm down, but nothing was working.
"Hiroshi! Why did you have to choose such a dangerous job!"
"Dangerous?" Yuji whispered to his brother. "My job is more dangerous than yours."
"Try telling that to Mom." The two shared a cringing look before turning to see their father lay a hand on their mother's arm.
"Ino, darling, everything will be all right."
Nakano Ino shrugged the hand off and turned glaring eyes to her husband. "How can you say that! Our youngest son is leaving to another continent and all you can say is it's going to be all right? You bastard!" Ino started poking her husband in the chest to make her point. "He's leaving us for three years! It's bad enough that Yuji had to leave us for a month, but three years! He would never! Hiroshi takes after you! Always having to have an adventure. Why couldn't he be smart and finish his education!"
Hiro sighed and walked to his mother. "Mom, I love you, but this is what I have to do. Besides I won't be alone."
Ino raised her head. "I know. I just don't want you to leave." Sobbing, she threw her arms around him and held on tight. "My baby!"
Yuji and Shika shared a look of sympathy before they walked out of the kitchen, ignoring Hiro's pleading face. And I thought Mom would be the most understanding….
GRAVITATION - Seguchi/Fujisaki Household
Throwing an orange goldfish in the air, Suguru leaned up and caught the cracker on its descent. Tohma had bought him two boxes of the salty treat, along with some rice crispy treats. Add to that mix some chocolate milk, and you had a very happy Fujisaki Suguru. He knew the others were probably going through the sappy, hugging part of goodbyes and he was happy that his family wasn't like that.
Unfortunately, the youngest member of Bad Luck thought too soon. His older cousin wasn't too keen on letting the boy go to America, especially with the American K as a tour guide. And it didn't help matters that his baby cousin would also be with the red-headed guitarist… alone. He was happy that Shuichi would be there also, but with Tatsuha along, Shuichi might think it would be okay to leave Suguru and Hiro alone… and it wasn't. At least, not in Tohma's books.
Before Suguru knew what hit him (he was too busy playing with the goldfish), he found himself with a lap of older cousin. Blinking, Suguru wondered what Tohma was doing. "Can I help you?"
"I don't know. Can you?"
Suguru growled softly at his cousin's grammar problems. "May I help you?"
His cousin nodded. "Yes, you may." Reaching behind him, Tohma pulled a spiral-ringed notebook, and opened it to the first page. "I have a list of things that you can't do in America. Think of them as rules, if you want."
Tohma closed the book and got off of his cousin, leaving the book on Suguru's lap. The younger boy watched him leave before opening the notebook.
Suguru: Please know that I am very happy for you. America is a fabulous place, and I'm sure you will think so too! I have been thinking about this since K first announced the idea to my father. It's true that I am very protective over you, but try to realize that it's for your on good. Now, here are some rules that I hope you follow. I have eyes everywhere! -insert smiley face-
Rule Number One: No alcohol, drugs, or any illegal substances.
Rule Number Two: If you must be alone with Hiro, please phone me before so. That way I can pin point the exact location to send the guards. I can't have my little cousin being taken advantage of!
Rule Number Three: I know that the rule above probably doesn't stand now, (since you and he have all ready gone further), but let him know that he can be deposed of.
Rule Number Four: YOU MUST CALL ME EVERY NIGHT!
Suguru sighed and flipped the book to the back. "How can someone think of this many rules?" The notebook was filled rules from front to back. All in all, there were over two-hundred rules. He stared at the last paragraph written.
If you reached this, Congratulations for taking the time to read these rules. I am very proud of you, Suguru! Please follow each and every rule, and I'm sure your time in America will be one you will never forget.
"If I follow these rules, it will be a terrible time." Suguru rubbed his forehead and sighed, "I'll follow some. Tohma won't know, right?"
Somewhere in the back of his mind, the keyboardist knew nothing could escape his cousin's wrath.
GRAVITATION - Uesugi Household
"I won't be gone that long. I mean, I'll be back before Bad Luck gets back. Why does Mom have to make such a big deal about it?" Tatsuha knew his older brother wasn't listening, but he also knew Eiri needed to do something to get his mind off the book releasing tomorrow. "I'm going to miss you guys, too, but I have to do this. Well, maybe not have to, but it's something I want to do. I love cameras and I love images. Maybe I'll do something in art design. I can always take classes to improve my artistic ability, right?"
Eiri sat up, ignoring his brother's questions, and left the living room. Tatsuha watched him walked up the stairs and disappear into his room. Sighing, he stretched out on the couch. I wonder what Ryuichi is doing.
The ringing of his cell phone brought him out of his thoughts and back to reality as he flipped the cover up, "Yeah?"
"Save me!" the frantic voice of his lover drifted into his ears and Tatsuha sighed happily.
"I'm not even leaving, but Mom insists on kissing the daylights out of us!"
Tatsuha let out a chuckle, "Maybe with Shuichi leaving, she feels like her other children might also." The sentence clicked in his head and he realized that was exactly what his own Mother was doing. "Hey, Ryuichi, we need to talk."
"We are talking, Tatsuha."
"No. About us."
Oh, how he hated hearing those words. They never amounted to anything great, and Ryuichi knew he wouldn't like where the conversation was going. "And?" He cursed at his raspy voice.
Tatsuha knew what that sound meant. He didn't want it to mean it, but… "I think that maybe we should be apart while I'm in America. It's not like it's going to be forever, just, you know. Could we really have a relationship with me on another continent?"
"I'd like to think we could."
"Meet me at the park, okay?"
"What? Ryuichi, I can't!"
Tatsuha sighed, "All right. I'll be there in twenty minutes."
GRAVITATION - A Park
He didn't know why he was here. His mind was set. They had to do this. Somehow, he had escaped the anger of his mother and left, Mika telling him she'll hold their mother off for a bit. The park was lit with lamps and the moon. It was a very romantic scene. Tatsuha didn't want it to be, though. He needed it to be dark, depressing. If he saw Ryuichi, he knew he wouldn't be able to hold to his thoughts. He would give in.
He didn't turn around. "Yeah."
Ryuichi sighed, "You're going to act like this until we finish, aren't you?"
"I just don't understand why you can't accept my decision."
The singer wrapped his arms around the boy's waist, pressing his chest to the other's back. "Because I don't want to lose you."
"But you aren't! It's just until I get back."
"And if you find someone else?"
Tatsuha turned his head to the side, "I won't. There's no one else." He felt the other body relax against his.
The teenager never thought a simple command could do so much to him. He turned around with his eyes closed and attached his lips to the willing ones in front of him. There were no sweet, innocent, chaste kisses, but only a long, passionate one that left both of them rigid. When they pulled apart, it shone in their eyes, and they both knew it was the right time.
"Where?" Ryuichi mumbled as he kissed and nibbled at a spot on younger ones neck.
Tatusha groaned at the sensation of teeth, "Anywhere."
GRAVITATION – The Next Day- Morning- 2 A.M.
Shuichi waited in his brother's room for him to come back. He had left last night saying that he had to stop a stupid Tatsuha from doing something… well, stupid. The singer hoped that everything was all right. He heard a tap on the window and sat up, smiling at his brother. He stood and opened the latch, letting the older one inside.
"It's cold out there," Ryuichi mumbled, rubbing his arms for warmth.
"Well?" Shuichi tapped his foot against the floor. "How did it go?"
Ryuichi grinned, "Perfect."
"You didn't!" As his brother's grin widen, Shuichi exclaimed, "Ryuichi! You did!"
"I thought you two were going to wait."
Ryuichi sighed. "We were, but with the circumstances, we decided to. Besides, I think our minds were a little fogged up at the time."
"How was it?"
"Like I said earlier, Shuichi, perfect. Absolutely perfect."
"And? Are you still together?"
His brother sat on his bed, taking off his shoes, "Eh, yes and no. While he's in America, we're not together, but if I happen to be there, then we are. We're separated unless we're near each other."
"That's a weird relationship."
"It was either that or have no relationship at all."
Ryuichi grabbed the television remote and lay on his bed, "Why are you still up? Don't you have to get up at four?"
"Yeah," Shuichi muttered, lying next to his brother, "but I can't sleep."
"You can always sleep on the plane." Ryuichi pressed the 'On' button and waited for the next show to come on. He really like these news channels that came on at night. Before he could change the channel to another one, his brother gasped and took the remote from him. "What?"
"Look!" On the television, it showed a news anchor on one of the boring stations Ryuichi never watched. What she was saying, however, caught his attention perfectly.
"Author, Uesugi Eiri, will be releasing a new book today. It will go on sale at three this morning. Sources say it took the young man a week to write. The dedication is what caught my interest the most: a poem written by Uesugi to Shindou Shuichi. Normally, I wouldn't share such a gesture, but for this one time, I will.
"There were times when I didn't believe
That anyone special was waiting for me
But my views changed when I looked at you
Smiling wide, beautiful and everything true
We had it all, the love and happiness
But if fell apart at my stupid mistake
Now I'm wishing I could clean up this mess
To open my eyes and watch you wake
I can't let you leave without opening my heart
The years ahead are the ones where we'll be apart
I can't picture the future with you gone
Let me back in and I promise you'll never be alone
I realize you may think this is only an empty promise
That I can never be trusted ever again in your eyes
The night skies never held any of my wishes
But without you here, there is one for every star."
The blonde anchor smiled at the camera, "The poem was named after the book, Every Star. Uesugi's publishing company expects the story to sell millions, and after reading the summary and the poem, I truly believe it will."
Ryuichi glanced at his brother, watching the emotions pass through his face. "Shuichi?"
"I think I have a new song." Shuichi stood and walked towards the door, "Call K and everyone and tell them to meet me at the studio in thirty minutes."
The boy didn't answer, expecting his older brother to do what he asked. Ryuichi watched his bedroom door close, and sighed, taking out his cell phone from his jean's pocket. "The things I do for you, little brother."
GRAVITATION - The Next Morning
Eiri sighed as he woke to the glaring sun through the gold curtains. Grumbling about the unfair light, he pulled the comforter back over his head. After a few minutes of unfit sleep, Eiri realized why he couldn't go back to sleep. It had finally arrived. The day he had dreaded since he first found out about the American tour. Bad Luck had left Japan early this morning. There was no more Shindou Shuichi in his life, and that meant there was nothing left in this life for him to live. Shuichi had shown him true love, the kind he thought he had with Kitazawa. Unfortunately for him, Kitazawa would always be a part of his life, whether he wanted him to be or not.
I wonder, Eiri thought, turning over to lay on his side, if Yuki would have never came, would Shuichi and I still be together? Shaking his head, he knew now was not the time to wish for the past to change. After all, like his mother once told him, "You only get once chance at life. Live it to the fullest without any regrets."
He had regrets. He regretted ever meeting Yuki. He regretted ever thinking that the older man could bring to worlds unknown. He regretted losing his innocence to the man. But most of all, he regretted meeting Shuichi. Maybe it was the feeling of morning grumpiness that made him think that. Maybe it was his mind finally succumbing to the lost thoughts of nothingness. Maybe it was just his way of thinking.
Did he regret the love they shared? Never. But maybe if they had never met, then maybe he wouldn't feel so lost. Then again, if they had never met, he would have never known that there was something more out there. That he had a purpose in life. A purpose to love a pink-haired singer… who left Japan this morning.
Deciding to leave the world again and go back to the dreams of him and Shuichi, Eiri closed his eyes, prepared to sleep the day away. What he didn't expect, however, was the music blaring outside his window. Not the music from a car radio or his brother playing the small stereo, but real music with instruments. And he definitely didn't expect to hear the voice he never thought he would hear again. Jumping out of his bed, Eiri pulled on the shirt hanging from his desk's chair, and peered out the open window.
Bad Luck was on his lawn with their instruments, and the neighbors had come out of their house to see what was happening. Yet the only thing Eiri paid attention to was the singer staring at him with violet eyes.
A slow tune on the piano started, slowly increasing with the whistling sound of the guitar. Shuichi had closed his eyes, waiting for the signal in the music before he began singing.
We ended on a wonderful note gone wrong
I never thought I would ever feel so alone
But you're not here and I feel that maybe it was my fault
I heard those words so many times before
I built the walls that has been keeping us apart for so long
The pink-haired singer opened his eyes and gazed into golden ones. His heart was beating faster and faster with each note played. His band mates had been mad when they arrived at the studio early that morning, but when they found out the reason why, they were happy to help.
Each time we ever kissed, each time we ever loved
I always thought I would wake up from a never-ending dream
I didn't know that it was really true; there was someone in love with me
Without you near me now, I feel that I can't conquer the easiest tasks
The stars are shining bright in the night sky, but I can't feel their warmth
Shuichi hoped that the boy in the window could feel the emotions he poured in this song. It had taken no longer than twenty minutes to write, but an hour to assemble to a tune they all agreed on.
He knew there were other people around and he knew they knew what he was doing. They had to. It had been in the news after the release of "Believe" that the two were no longer a couple. How he hated seeing it on television, reading it in the papers, hearing people give their sympathies.
At night I lay awake expecting you to call
I dream about the times of love I felt with you
Of you holding my hand and never letting go
You promised me forever, I promised it to you too
But we never counted on the storm passing through
Eiri shuddered at what the word "storm" meant. He knew he didn't deserve the singer's forgiveness… so why was Shuichi giving it to him. Maybe he had it all wrong, maybe Shuichi wasn't doing what he thought he was. Maybe the singer was really telling him there were no second chances and that Eiri's mother was right: "You only get once chance at life."
I want you back in my life; I want to feel the electricity
Of the future nights held with passion and slow breathing
We are tangled in each other hearts, rough beats harmonizing
Letting go cries as we become one, smiles as we finally feel complete
In the middle of the night, we come together, short confessions
In the middle of singing the verse, Shuichi blushed at the innuendos he cleverly placed. He knew anyone who had their heads in the gutter would know what he was talking about. It was true, though. He had thought about what it would feel like to become one with Eiri in an intimate way.
The last verse was coming from the sound of the piercing guitar wail. Every Bad Luck had one before the end. It was a tradition that separated Bad Luck from any other group. It was their mark.
It's the times where I think about the puzzles of our life
The pieces that fit so well together, twisty but so right
I never want to open my eyes and glance at the waking sun
To only know that I was just dreaming of the possibilities
As Shuichi sung the last note, he didn't notice Eiri had disappeared from the window, but when he opened his eyes to lonely curtains blowing in the breeze, he lowered his head. Before his heart could realize that maybe the boy was coming to him, his mind delved into other scenarios. Ones that Shuichi wished would never happen. What if Eiri refused to accept his apology for his stupidity? What if…
The warmth of lips over his own brought the singer out his thoughts and he opened his eyes. Gazing into loving gold, Shuichi smiled into the kiss, wrapping his arms around the other boy. There were loud cheers in the background and somehow, local reporters had been called onto the seen and now were taping the event. But to the two boys wrapped together in their own world, nothing else mattered.
Date: September 16, 2-
Inspiration: Suguru's girlish screams as Hiro tickles him
Expression: Amused –insert toothy smiley face-
Subject: Another Day with Amazing Results
I can't believe it's been five months since leaving Japan and arriving in the States. It's so different here. People are really wishy-washy on issues and sometimes it's funny to realize that maybe the fans here are a little bit crazier than the ones in Japan. Of course, we should have expected this. K is our manager after all.
I think Suguru is dying with Tohma's rules to live by. To make sure Suguru is following them, Tohma sent a bodyguard. Can you believe it! And I thought Ryuichi was protective! Though, I can't really say Sakano makes the best bodyguard. I mean, he's scrawny. I guess Tohma wanted someone who he knew would tell him everything and Sakano does worship Tohma… it's scary sometimes; especially after we found that picture of Tohma in Sakano's wallet. Man, was his face redder than a tomato!
Eiri and I talked last night. He and Ryuichi might be coming to our concert in Atlanta! The concert is in two weeks, so they're trying to talk the parental patrol into letting them go. I don't see why Mom and Dad won't let Ryu leave. I mean, he is old enough to do what he wants… I guess he doesn't want to disappoint them. But if I know Ryuichi –AND I KNOW RYUICHI- then he will let nothing stop him from seeing Tatsuha again.
-giggles- Whoever said being a third wheel sucks, never had friends like Hiro and Suguru. Even when they're cuddly, Hiro always finds some way to embarrass Suguru and it's always funny. I mean… HEY!
It is not! It is childish!
Aw, c'mon, Ru! We're just playing around!
You know I hate it when you call me Ru.
-insert pouty face- So, Tatsuha can call you that and I can't!
How so! Don't I mean more to you then some stupid teenager! I'm your lover!
HEY! I am not a stupid teenager! I happen to be very mature for my age.
Yeah, sure. You're only mature when you know Ryuichi is around. And the next time you two decide to have phone sex, make sure you don't have it on speaker phone.
Like you and Ru are any better! (HA! I'm the only one who can call him that!)
ARGH! FIND YOUR OWN JOURNALS TO RANT IN!
Sorry about that Journalese, but those guys are crazy when they get in their moods. I guess Hiro will always be jealous of Tatsuha. You would think he would be comforted with the fact that Tatusha is dating Ryuichi.
I AM NOT JEALOUS!
Uh-huh, sure. I don't blame you. I am irresistible.
-sighs- I better end this before I run out of pages. I'll write next time… and maybe they won't steal my journal again.
COME BACK HERE TATSUHA!
-pokes tongue out- You can't catch me, guitar freak!
Idiots, every last one of them.
While I was planning on not posting this until the one-year anniversary, I couldn't bring myself to do that to you guys. I am so lucky for each and every one of you! You have no idea how much happiness I have in my heart right now…. and WOW! 100+ reviews! You guys are simply amazing! Thankies to all for the support!
XxTypoMasterxX: Ah, yes, this is a happy ending... I hope this is to your liking. Thankies!
xunxin: Yay! I'm not that good at describing scenes... I'm working on that in my Creative Writing class. Aw, I hope you like these two songs too! Thankies!
Em-chan15: Wow! 45 minutes? Ah, almost an hour... maybe this chapter will take up the rest... Thankies!
Bram: Mwahuahaa! School night? Oh, man, I always stay up late on school nights. Hm, I can write IC, but I like OCC better. You're able to play with the characters more. Thankies!
chupacabra: Discontinue? Nah, I didn't want to add another to the list. Of course, there will always be Hiro/Suguru! My favorite non-canon (I WISH!) pairing of Gravi! I might write another fic, but it will have to be after I finish another one. Thankies!
anangelslife: I just wanted her to be like that. I would have too! Thankies!
Silver Flame of the Phoenix: Aw! Incredible? I don't know about that... I try. Thankies!
Glomping Kawaii: Oi, I can't write lemons... my virgin eyes (yeah right!) can't deal with it... Maybe in the future? Hopefully you liked the fluffyness though... Thankies!
GravitationInnocence: I have updated! And completed a fic! Wah, so proud! Thankies!
Oh, and this chapter is fourteen pages, including review responses! WOO! -grins-