Disclaimer: The Harry Potter world and all it's characters belong to JK Rowling and WB. I am making no money out of this.

Rating: PG-13 for the main story, with a few R ratings thrown in here and there.

Genre: Lots of romance, comedy, drama, confused feelings, horse riding, nightclubs, hand jobs…wait, those aren't a genre… (shrugs) Oh well.

AN: Hey all! This is my first HP fanfic, and just to let you know the setting I've placed them in here is close to where I live in Surrey. This is a SLASH fic between Draco and Harry mainly, with a dash of Harry and Seamus, and eventual Dean and Seamus, so if you don't like, don't read!

Summary: Seamus is openly gay, Harry is openly oblivious, and both have a bit of a problem. It's been a year since they graduated from Hogwarts and lived in the same house together, but Seamus had left with a broken heart, and Harry with a confused one. Seamus confessed to Dean he loved him and caused Dean to hate him, and as for Harry... why the hell had Draco kissed him during the graduation party? A year later Draco and Dean turn up unexpectedly back into their lives, and while Seamus tries to deal with his love for a hateful Dean, Harry deals with his own feelings over Draco. He had been happy being openly oblivious, but Draco's kiss had left him openly...confused?

So my friends, read on for a story of love, friendship, and a lot of 'out of the closet' references ;)

Openly Confused

By StarRose

20th November 2005

Chapter 1: Reunion

It was early June in the small village of Langley Vale, just south of London, and 18, nearly 19 year old Harry Potter strolled with his hands in his pockets down the quiet little country lane heading back to his home. He looked to his right and vaguely watched the horses in the fields next to him graze the lush grass the spring had left with its rainfall. He stopped and stood by the farm entrance, 'Langley Vale Farm' printed in faint white lettering on the top wooden plank of the gate, and leant on it, staring out into the open fields, wondering when Seamus had actually meant for him to come back.

Over the last few days his housemate had been acting very oddly. Harry could be doing some normal mundane thing, normal mundane things usually being tidying up the mess from the party's Seamus like to hold every so often, when Seamus would suddenly grab him by the arm and practically throw him out the door, telling him to go for a walk and come back later, before quickly shutting the door and leaving Harry standing outside with wide startled eyes and his wand still in the air from levitating things around the room.

He wouldn't have minded, after all it got him out of cleaning up after him, but lately he'd been having too many things on his mind to go for walks, he needed something to distract him, something busy to do.

His career wasn't going very well, and that was putting it mildly. He'd been signed up as Seeker for the Basingstoke Beater's at the beginning of the year, but even with Harry catching the snitch, the rest of the team had played so poorly they'd lost within the first few matches of the season and had got dropped from the league. Now they were back to the local matches until they trained enough to be accepted back in, and that wasn't going to happen until next year.

Not only that, but Harry had also been picked up for training as an Auror at the ministry, but what with Voldemort back, there were no spare Auror's to train him, and all he could do was sit around and wait for a letter for them telling him when he could start.

Not being able to get out there, to help, it was driving him nuts. He had all the qualifications, heck he probably had more experience with the Dark Lord personally then any other Aurors put together, but, without passing the test, you simply weren't allowed. Harry, being Harry of course, had at first paid no attention to rules, and had gone out secretly, but unfortunately he was soon found out, and with the extra security and protection of these times, was forced to just go back home and wait.

So here he was, waiting for his Quidditch team to get back on track, and waiting for that one little letter. It had been a very boring year since they graduated, and as Harry watched the clouds drift by, the soft warm breeze ruffling his unruly hair, bringing with it the smell of freshly cut grass, his mind wandered back to his housemate.

He and Seamus had both shared the same little house for this year after their graduation from Hogwarts, and not that he minded at all sharing with him, but he did end up missing Ron and Hermione a lot, Ron especially.

When they'd left Hogwarts, Hermione continued to live with her parents. She was currently working as an assistant at St Mungo's Hospital, in training to become a Mediwitch. She visited when she could, but working hours were long for her, and she'd always saY she couldn't make it over as much as she wanted.

Ron's mother on the other hand, mad that Ron, although passing all his exams, had only just passed all his exams, refused to let him out her sight until he found a good paying job, or went back to Hogwarts again. Well, Ron flatly refused to go back and be the oldest student there by repeating a year, so he'd spent his time since trying to find a job, without much success, and without his mother letting him leave the house until he had.

How Harry and Seamus had come to share a house was another strange little story. At the beginning of the seventh year Seamus, - and why he had chosen Harry to tell this to Harry still had no idea - had come out to him saying he was gay. Harry hadn't quite known how to react to that, not sure whether Seamus had told him just because he wanted to tell someone, or that he was hinting that he was interested in Harry specifically. His blank look must have been pretty obvious though, because Seamus had soon elaborated that it was Dean he had feelings for, but didn't have a clue on what to do about that.

Once again, why the hell Seamus was asking him on how to come out to his best friend that he loved him in more than just a best friend kind of way, Harry still didn't know.

Half way through the year however, it became very obvious when Seamus had told Dean, because Harry, Ron and Hermione had come back through the Portrait Hole to find Seamus and Dean having a humongous argument in the middle of the common room. It seems they had walked in at end of it though because a moment later Dean stormed passed them through the Portrait Hole, leaving Seamus standing in the middle of the deadly quiet room, the other Gryffindor students sitting around them not making a sound, before Seamus turned around and slowly walked up to the boy's dormitory, looking if anything like he was about to cry.

After that, the two best friends seemed to have turned ex-best friends, and Seamus had worked his way in to Harry's little group instead. Harry had never asked what had happened, in fact no one mentioned anything at all, and Seamus never seemed to have any urge to divulge in what had happened either. All they knew was that now, Seamus and Dean had nothing to do with one another.

Near the end of the year Seamus had asked what Harry was doing about living arrangements when they left the school, and Harry had said he was just going find a small place just out of London, and had automatically said yes when Seamus had asked if he could stay until he had enough money to get his own place, he wasn't going to turn him down.

Lost in memories for that moment, Harry sighed softly to himself, watching one of the horses trot over to another patch of inviting looking grass. It was thinking of the end of his Hogwarts' years that brought another strange little encounter with Malfoy, just at the end of the graduation party, back into his mind.

Harry had never been sure if Malfoy was drunk that night, although every cell in his body hoped he was, but he had never had a chance to ask afterwards as it had been the last time he had seen him…

One year ago

Harry wandered outside from the Great Hall for some fresh air, his deep green dress robes flowing behind him as he walked down the steps. He stood at the bottom for a moment, wondering where to go, before deciding to just simply sit on the bottom step, staring out into the darkness, the pounding rocking music from the Weird Sisters filtering through the walls, echoing softly in the night air. Harry dangled the near empty Butterbeer bottle between his hands, not fond on the more alcoholic Butterdraught, staring up the clear sky, the stars twinkling overhead He'd left Ron and Hermione dancing along to Weird Sisters, well, dancing may be the wrong description, it was more like Ron staggering about and Hermione trying to keep him upright.

He smiled at the thought of his best friends and placed the bottle to his lips and tilted his head back, letting the bitter liquid slide down his throat, glancing to his right as Justin Finch-Fletchly and Hannah Abbot came down the steps, holding hands, throwing two quick grins at Harry before disappearing round the corner. Harry grinned after them, before placing his empty bottle on the step beside him.

"Fancy another Potter?"

Harry looked behind him to see of all people, Draco Malfoy, standing a few steps behind him, holding two bottles of Butterbeer.

"What's this? Deciding to be civil on our last day?" Harry inquired.

"No." Draco said sharply, before shoving one of the bottles into Harry's hand and sitting down next to him.

Harry blinked at him, looking at him sitting so close, and inched away slightly. Draco didn't move, just stared out into the grounds, before he raised his own bottle and taped the top with his wand, the lid falling off to the grass by his feet. He stuck his wand out to Harry's bottle, indicating for Harry to put it by the tip offering to open it. Harry however still stared at him, before frowning suspiciously.

"What have you done to it?"

Draco scowled at him, retracting his wand, "Fine, open it yourself I don't care." He spat, before taking a swig out of his own bottle and went back to staring out to the grounds.

Harry eyed him suspiciously, then eyed the bottle he was holding suspiciously, before mentally shrugging, and opening the bottle.

The two sat there in silence, the only sound being the occasional swallowing of the butterbeer as they drank in the night air. It was a fairly comfortable silence, as comfortable as you could get sitting with your enemy for the past 7 years anyway, but the longer the silence went on, the more anxious Harry got. What was Malfoy doing? Did he just feel like sitting here for no reason?

Harry took another sip and glanced at him, only to find Draco looking at him, or rather, looking at his neck as he swallowed the drink. Harry didn't think Draco had noticed that he saw him, but the blond soon turned back to staring out when Harry turned to look at him.

"I take it you're not here just for a friendly social chat then Malfoy."

"Shut up." Draco said quietly, taking another sip from the bottle.

Harry glared at him. Even when they were sitting in near silence the guy pissed him off. So, picking up his empty bottle on the step, Harry got up, "Well then, as you've obviously just decided to sit there and annoy me, I'm going to go back to the party. Thanks for the drink." He added idly, taking one step back up before he suddenly felt Draco's hand on his ankle, stopping him from moving. Harry looked down, only to see the Slytherin boy staring at the ground, but his grip on Harry's ankle not loosening.

"Let go Malfoy." Harry warned, "Or do you really want me to hex you on our last day here-"

"-follow me."

Draco suddenly rose from the step, letting go of Harry's ankle, and walked a few steps forward.

"Excuse me?" Harry said, staring at him, "I'm not following you alone anywhere."


Draco suddenly spun around to glare at Harry, and Harry was a little taken aback at the look in his eyes. It had the usual fierceness there, but there was something behind that, and if Harry didn't know better, he'd almost say he looked sad.

"Although this would be the perfect opportunity to get you out of my life for good," Draco said quickly, "For once I am not…- I'm not going to… - look just follow me, I want to tell you something." He eventually managed to say, indicating to the same path that Justin and Hannah had taken earlier.

"No, tell me here."

"I can't."

"Why not?"

Draco glared at Harry venomously, obviously annoyed with Harry's lack of cooperativeness. "Because someone might walk through the door and it's…" He said after a pause, but he trailed off, his voice quiet.

Harry watched him, his eyes lowered to the ground, the almost sad look on his face again, and it was an expression Harry had never seen on Malfoy's face before. A small gust of wind whipped its way around the stone castle, ruffling Draco's black dress robes, his hair falling around his eyes as he moved a hand to brush it aside. There was just something about him, his stuttering earlier that Malfoy never ever did, the odd niceness, Harry couldn't quiet put his finger on it but…..

He sighed.

"I must be insane," he muttered to himself, stepping down off the last step and placing his one empty and one half full bottles of butterbeer on the step behind him, "Fine, but if you try anything funny don't think I won't hurt you, it's not like I can get detention for anything now."

"Oh what a threat Potter, really, I'm shivering with fear."

Harry stopped a few feet in front of him at that, "Do you want me to go back inside?" he said, indicating with his wand back to the door.

Draco seemed to grit his teeth to stop himself from saying something, before looking away again at the ground, "No….just follow me." He said, turning around, his dress robes billowing behind him as he walked around one of the stone walls.

Harry sighed again and followed him.

They didn't walk very far, just to a small indent in the stone wall, where flat side wall met round wall of a tower, and this is where Draco stopped, cut off from view from any windows, and nothing but Hagrids hut in the far distance, the lights off as Hagrid was enjoying the party with everyone else.

"Alright what is it?" Harry said impatiently, "Because funnily enough I don't want to spend my last evening here with you."

Draco looked at Harry, meeting his eyes, not necessarily a scowl, but a stern look, and one that didn't last very long either as he looked away again.

"And will you stop doing that!" Harry said, as Draco looked back up at him.

"Doing what?"

"Looking away like that!" For some reason it made Harry feel uncomfortable, and he got the feeling he wasn't going to enjoy whatever Draco had to say to him.

"I can do what I like Potter." He snapped back at him, before again he seemed to grind his teeth, like he wished he hadn't said that.

Harry looked at him strangely, "Look will you hurry up?"

Draco looked him in the eyes again before closing them "Alright, look," he sighed, before opening them and glaring straight back at Harry, "I'm getting really pissed off with you Potter." He growled, stalking towards him, "I've always been pissed off with you, -"

"-makes two of us-"

"-but do you know what's pissing me off even more?" he asked, ignoring Harry's comment as he walked straight up and stood directly in front of him, face to face.

Harry stood his ground, staring back into those glaring grey eyes, "…what?" he dared to ask, his hand gripping his wand tighter out of instinct.

"What's pissing me off even more is despite of all of that, I still want to do this."

Before Harry could even find the correct string of words to put together the sentence "What the hell are you talking about Malfoy?", Harry suddenly found Draco's lips crushing down on his own, and he dropped his wand, stumbled backwards a few steps, eyes wide and the rest of his body frozen. Draco had wrapped his arms tightly around Harry's chest, keeping his arms trapped at his sides so he couldn't get away.

Draco's eyes were tightly shut as he pressed further against Harry's lips, his tongue forcing Harry's lips open and Harry, too shocked to even fight back, just stood there as Draco devoured his mouth feverishly, running his tongue everywhere and holding him tightly against him.

Harry could do nothing but stare at Draco's closed eyelids, and feel his own heartbeat racing. Or maybe it was Draco's heart he could feel racing, or a mixture of both. Whatever it was, the cold air around them seemed to disappear as the heat grew between them, when suddenly, Draco pulled away.

Harry found himself panting to regain his breath, his lips rosy with the forcefulness of the kiss, and he stared at Draco incredulously, no words forming in his brain. Draco was panting too, except with him there was a slight tint of red on his cheeks. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, and glared at Harry,

"You really piss me off." He breathed, and he swiftly walked past him back to the main doors and back to the party, leaving Harry standing in the dark completely stunned.

It took a moment for Harry's brain to realign itself, and when the realisation that Draco Malfoy had just kissed him, heck, snogged the living daylights out of him, he did a moments impersonation of gapping fish before twirling around and staring at the now empty path Draco had walked down.

His heartbeat was still racing as he stared at the path, his breath coming in quick short pants as he still tried to accept what the hell had just happened. Draco Malfoy had kissed him! The very last person on his list to ever kiss him, in fact, Malfoy wasn't even on the list!

Harry just stood there in a kind of trance, not noticing Justin and Hannah walk up beside him, Hannah's hair a little messier than had been before, and a very suspicious smile on both hers and Justin's face.

"Hey Potter." Justin greeted, wrapping an arm around Hannah's waist, but stopped walking when he saw the look on Harry's face, "Hey, are you alright?"

Harry blinked, blinked again, then looked across at them, "Yeah…" he said, dazed, before he shook his head slightly, "Err- yeah, I'm fine." He said, smiling back at them.

Justin grinned back, and he and Hannah made their way down the path back to the party.

What the hell was that about? Harry finally managed to ask himself, before unconsciously raising his fingers to his lips, pressing them there. He realised what he was doing though moments later and quickly put his hand back down, frowning annoyed at himself, before bending down to pick up his wand that he had dropped, still in a slight shock.

Malfoy had been blushing when they parted, and Harry…Harry didn't quite know what to make of it. He thought Malfoy hated him, in fact a few seconds before he kissed him he just said that he pissed him off! So what the heck was that kiss about? Malfoy hates him, and Harry hates Malfoy, so how the heck did any of that sentence involve a seriously hot kiss!

Harry quickly retracted the 'seriously hot' part of that thought.

Harry found himself walking back down the path to rejoin his friends, and he vaguely remembered to pick up the bottles he'd left at the bottom step, and made his way back up to the doors. Walking into the Great Hall, the music still going strong and his fellow classmates enjoying their final night at Hogwarts, he wondered why his eyes decided to search for Malfoy first amongst the crowd, and when he caught his own reflection staring back at him in one of the mirrors that had been dotted about the Hall for the dance, he realised with a strange fluttering feeling in the pit of his stomach, that he had been blushing too.

Present time

Harry closed his eyes for a moment, trying to will away that memory. He'd never seen Malfoy after that, not once, and so had never had the chance to actually ask what that kiss had been about.

Harry stood up straight from leaning on the gate and stretched his arms up behind his head, stifling a yawn. Glancing at his watch, thinking that whatever Seamus' reason for having him out the house this time was must be over by now, Harry crossed over the local muggle Petrol station and up Grosvenor Road, heading up to the very end, a cul-de-sac, where the road met forest, and opened the small wooden gate down the path to his home.

Harry knocked loudly on the front door. "Seamus it's Harry! Am I allowed back in my own house now?"

There was a sudden crash from the other side of the door, and Seamus' voice of "Shhhh shhhh!".

Harry frowned, what on earth was he…

The front door opened, and suddenly Harry was met with a loud;


Harry blinked as mini magical fireworks started zooming around the front hallway, and the faces of his old Gryffindor classmates grinning back at him.

"HARRY!" Both Ron and Hermione screamed as one, as they both flung themselves at him. Harry kind of stood there for a moment with a lopsided grin on his face, before Ron suddenly yanked at his arm over to Seamus.

"Guess what mate? I'M STAYING! I finally found a decent job and my mum says I can move out! Then Seamus here contacted me and said you had a room and I could move in! THIS IS GONNA GREAT!" he exclaimed, obviously wanting to have told Harry this ages ago, and now finally letting it escape in one giant loud shout for joy.

"Hope you don't mind," Seamus grinned as Harry had looked over at him, his thick Irish accent as prominent as ever, "But ah know you've been down lately, and ah know it's your house an' all, but ah didn't think you'd mind having your best mate movin' in."

Harry stared at him smiling, a soft, grateful look in his eyes. Seamus had possibly done the one thing that really could take his mind off how bad everything had been going lately. Having Ron back was going to be the best thing that had happened to him all year, and Harry didn't think there was any way possible getting across to Seamus how thankful he really was.

"That's why I had to shove ya out the house, Ron was tryin' to use a telephone at certain times to arrange things, and well, he's pretty loud." He chuckled, Ron's ecstatic grin disappearing for a second, making the others around laugh.

Harry found himself being hugged by Hermione again, as Seamus announced food and plenty of alcoholic drinks were in the lounge, and so the small crowd moved through, chatting away, their first proper reunion in a year.

Sadly though, as Harry looked around at his two best friends, Neville being given a rather large pint of Butterdraught by a still grinning Seamus, Lavender Brown and Parvati Patel laughing with each other over the snacks, he noticed one person missing.

Seamus hadn't invited Dean.

To Be Continued…

AN: Please check out the link at the bottom of my profile. It's the site where I post notes relevant to each chapter of this fic. I would put the link here but FF don't allow links.