I looked up into Angel… my Angel's face and saw such child-like glee that I laughed. It was the first time in a long time. How could anyone not be filled up with happiness at her lit-up face? And the carnival was the perfect setting for it. She pulled me along by my hand, towards the huge Ferris wheel.
"Angel…" I knew what she was thinking. She turned to me, a familiar glint in her eye.
"C'mon!" And she turned and ran with me to the end of the line.
We joked all the way up. Once we were at the top, the ride stopped to let others on. Angel looked over the edge, then turned to me and asked, "Want to dance?"
"Here? Now? On top of the Ferris Wheel?"
"Yes, yes, and… yes!" She grabbed hold of my hands and twirled me around. I laughed again, and twirled with her. The car we were in tipped dangerously. A shout from below ordered us to stop. She kissed me on the cheek and said "Oh well. Look at the view… isn't it great?" All I could see was a bunch of fog and murky skies. Nothing "great" about it... but Angel's version of "great" had never been exactly with status quo. I reached out and hugged the drag queen around the waist, and we sat down on the little bench.
We got to the bottom eventually, and the attendant gave us a very disapproving look. Angel winked and flounced away. I caught up to her, and we walked along admiring all the contests and prizes and rides, until I stopped, looking at a big stuffed rose in one of the booths. I led Angel over to it, and said, "That's going to be for you." I sat down on the little plastic stool, and waited for the bell to ring that said I could squirt at the little target. It was easy to win three times in a row, and I got the rose for her. I handed it to her, and she "smelled" it like a real flower. She looked up at me with adoring brown eyes and thanked me with a small kiss.
We spent all day at the carnival, running around doing everything there was to do. The day glided into evening and the carnival closed. I looked back at the gate decorated with tiny lights and thought, I wish I could stay here forever with Angel. Then, I turned to the streets of New York, and saw so many ways to live. Hell with the carnival, I corrected myself, I want to be forever with Angel.