Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate Atlantis, nor do I claim to.

The world felt like it was in slow motion.

Every second felt like an eternity as I clung to his side like a leech.

This couldn't be happening.

Blood soaked our clothes and the ground of The Jumper.

Lorne and his team had come to rescue us but it was too late.

It should be me laying there pale as the ghost I was destined to one day become.

I should be fighting for my life, having to rely on Carson's superb medical skills to bring me back from the edge.

Fear fueled me as I shouted to Lorne to hurry up.

Teyla tried to pry me from the prone, unconscious form and I'm pretty sure I swore at her.

It was my fault. They were pointing a gun at me, not him.

He was meant to be the non self-sacrificing one of the team. I was meant to Jump in front of bullets for him, not the other way around.

I can feel him drifting away.

I can feel my self yearning to go with him.

We're almost at the gate now. They want me to let go of him.

I can't.

They don't understand.

None of them know.

They don't know that he is my world.

They don't know that I can't imagine continuing my life without him

I love him.

I only wish I could have told him that.


Teyla, Ronon, Lorne and his men watched as Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard clung to the dieing man, each praying that Dr. Rodney McKay would survive.