Chapter 3: Accident in God's eyes...or in my dreams?

So I'm 25 now, and life seems to be going back to normal. My friend Laura called early this morning asking about going somewhere for summer vacation, you know, some friend time. I was in no mood to go, but of course, what were friends for? "Alright, I'll go wherever, but can we please wait a few weeks or so?" "Ok Arielle, but where I choose you will promise to come right?" "Right," I griefully moaned. Wherever she was choosing I had no clue, but I did respect her. She came over my house to see how far along I was coming for our so called trip. "Please you promised!" "Yes, I know I promised, but I refuse to go back there." "Arielle, it's only Romania." "ONLY ROMANIA! Laura you have no idea of what happened there. As I said before, I am not going!" Laura folded her arms, reminding me of my late sister. "Look, I don't want to go. Anywhere else would've been fine, but you had to go along and choose Romania."

"Alright if you don't want to go that's fine. I just wanted to go somewhere I haven't been before." Those words of hers, reminded me of myself, and of my adventurious half. As much as I regreted saying no, a part of me wanted to return there. I bit my lip, rethinking her idea. I could tell that she noticed me doing so, and a smug grin appeared on her face. "I knew you couldn't resist a proposal such as this. Adventure runs through you." "I can't help it. It's like you're challenging me, saying I'm a scaredy cat." "Maybe I am." I glarred at her, my eyes felt a little watery, but it was no use. I turned the radio on, and this strange melody came. I felt so intranced by it. I liked it, it was so...dark.

I've been watching your world from afar
I've been trying to be where you are
And I've been secretly falling apart
Unseen
To me, you're strange and you're beautiful
You'd be so perfect with me
But you just can't see
You turn every head but you don't see me

I felt so warmed by it, like I actually knew what it meant, even if I didn't really.

I'll put a spell on you
You'll fall asleep
When I put a spell on you
And when I wake you I'll be the first thing you see
And you'll realize that you love me

I did feel like I had a spell on me. But who did I love? And what spell was it?

Sometimes the last thing you want comes in first
Sometimes the first thing you want never comes
But I know that waiting is all you can do
Sometimes

I'll put a spell on you
You'll fall asleep
When I put a spell on you
And when I wake you I'll be the first thing you see
And you'll realise that you love me

Like in a trance I couldn't help but laugh such an unearthly one. My eyes felt strange, every part of me did. Laura was looking strangly at me. "What?" "Arielle are you ok?" "Yea I'm fine. I like the song don't you?" "No not really, it's kinda gothic." "Now who's scared? I like it." I smiled, but I didn't understand why Laura looked so disturbed. "Arielle, you look so...so..." "So...?" "So evil. I mean, I didn't know you liked that song at all. You don't seem to be gothic." "I'm not, but I just liked the song. It just seems so comforting." "Comforting? How so?" "Well, it's hard to explain. It's like I know what it means, but I really don't, and I feel like it's telling me something, but I don't know what." "Uh-huh. I see." "No you don't.'' "You're right I don't. So I know that this question is getting very old, but what is your dream like?" Out of nowhere she said that. I was shocked, but I was not suprised. Everyone I knew seemed to ask me that very question. I sighed. "You really wanna know?" She nodded her head. "Alright. It all began when my family died as you know. Um...It's kinda strange at first, but I got used to it." "What did you wear, what happened?" "I'll get to that, jeez. Anyway, I always wear this silvery/white dress with a silver mask. A man is dancing with me, blah blah blah, and that's it." "Why aren't you giving me any details?" Her face was like a sad puppy dog's. I was not falling for that damn look, and I had it with her so far. "Look, I'm really getting tired so please..." "Com'on Arielle! Are you coming with me or not?" I pondered for a moment. "Fine, I'll go. Under one condition." "Yes, that being?" "What I say goes, alright?" She huffed and sighed, "Fine." With that she left and all was quiet.

I couldn't get those verses out of my head, and then a second song came up.

Come on, the night is young
Seek me out
because I'm ready to get stung
So long, so long, feed me
Come on, show me
come on, need me
Come on, show me the way
Come on, need me in that way
so long

You just never ever get what you want
You just never ever get what you need

Come on, you deserve me
Come on, it's the thought of you in my veins
Come on, show me the way
Come on, show me the feeling
so long

You just never ever get what you want
You just never ever get what you need

I never did get what I wanted or needed. But what did I desreve in this life? Was I truely still an accident in God's eyes or in others around me? I only found one comfort, and that was my single dream.

It started like it always did. The flowers, the dancers, him. I always found a secret comfort in him, his touch was all I needed, yet his words were different. "You aren't an accident my love. Trust me on that, if you weren't here, I would kill myself." "Don't do that. I am not that special to you." "I am afriad you are my darling. Witout you, my legacy would not survive, our legacy wouldn't." "What are you tslking about?" "Nothing my love. All in time." He dipped and spun me around, eligantly bringing me closer to him. He was behind me, caressing my neck with his gentle lips. "In the mean time, do I make your skin crawl?" "No never. I feel so loved by you." He smiled and spun me around to face him. "I feel the same way. Be mine always..." "I'm yours." I touched his right cheek, like always, and he shuddered. I took my hand off, thinking maybe he really didn't love me. "My love...I will always love you. Please do not take your loving hand off my face. I want to remeber this moment." "Yo always will in my dreams..." He smiled gently, rubbing his nose against mine. "Let me take off your mask my love. Let me see you..."