First things first. Hello everybody who actually bothers to read these. But then we come to the real test. Who is truly the saddest? You, for reading this, or me, for writing it? Probably me. But then, I truly am the biggest Final Destination fan in the world. Try and beat me if you want, but I don't think that there is anyone else who likes it as much as I do. Don't believe me? Well...
• I have seen the movie 38 times.
• I have written five FD fanfics
• Got the DVD and Video
• Spent about £30.00 on my FD resources
• Printed the whole script off the internet
• I know all the script word for word virtually
• I know the whole cast list
• All the words to every song in the film, including John Denver (Unfortunately and unintentionally)
• every little background detail
• I have picked extras that annoy me eg. Various women on the plane and certain people who stare at Alex at the memorial service.
• I have invented two games, 1) Throw the rag- You throw a cloth at characters when they're annoying you. 2) The Stoner Game- Pause the DVD at various times trying to make the characters looked stoned. Sad aren't I?
• I got the top score on this quiz on the internet about it
• I talk about it my whole life and dream about it
• Whenever I get the chance I write about it
• For my SAT's I wrote about me having a premonition and getting thrown off a plane. Sound familiar? Hey, I'll know what to thank if I get a level 8 though, won't I?
• I watch ANYTHING with any of the characters in. Even if I don't like it, I watch it. Eg. Disturbing Behaviour, Varsity Blues, Idly Hands, Dawson's Creek, Drop Dead Gorgeous, Roswell, American Pie, Road Trip. Yes, I liked all those things but the only reason I watched them was because they had people out of Final Destination in.
• Everything I sign up for, I give myself the username 'flight180'
• I have made a website about it, at .
• I have put pictures from it on my desktop
And so on and so forth. In fact, there is nothing in the world that would make me happy more than meeting the cast and being an extra in the sequel. So, any fat cat's reading this who could help me out there, you know the address to write to, flight_180 . PLEASE! I am completely and utterly devoted to the movie and I love it.
The only thing that is scaring me now is that for my holiday to Ibiza, I am on flight 188A.
Characters I don't own:Alex, Clear, Tod, Carter, Terry, Billy, Ms. Lewton, George, you know. All those people. These characters belong to Jeffrey Reddick, Glen Morgan and James Wong,or Warren and Zide productions or even New Line Cinema or whatever.
Characters I own that I made up myself: Cynthia Paster (Okay, so the name was used in the movie but I created the character) Tyler, the member of Nine Inch Nails that probably doesn't exist, Carter's little annoying brother, Terry's thirteen year old sister, Anton the barman, Kate and David Horton (cos I made up their first names) , Monsieur Glasion, Mr. Doggett the headmaster, Mr. G. Ayfool the truant officer, Mrs. Paster, Fluffy-Billy's pet goat, Dr. Schreck the psychiatrist, the names Cletus, Brandine and Joey a.k.a Alex's ridiculous story.
Spoilers:Er...Yes. I think you could say that. If you haven't seen the movie you might not understand parts of this, and there are a lot of references to events and characters in the movie itself. Aswell as that there are tie ins from other movies, so in actual fact it has spoilers not only for Final Destination, but also for Idle Hands and Amercian Pie etc.
Anyway, that's boring. Let's just cut straight to the chase shall we?
Waiting For A Final Destination. Yes, It's Another Obsessive Story
Alex was getting bored out of his mind at home. The crappy plastic monkeys hanging from his bedroom ceiling had stopped being fun and just got boring. He was convinced they were plotting his doom, late at night when he was in bed. Then again, he could be going insane.
Linda and Jerry Waggner had forbidden Tod to see Alex since the plane crash. Jerry had got some ridiculous idea in his head that somehow George's death was all Alex's fault...Hmmm, wonder where he got that from?
Anyway, Alex had no friends left in the world now. He had always tried to delude himself that he was quite a popular guy, but now he realised he was the saddest in the class, which quite frankly, hurt his feelings.
The World Famous Author's Notes: Well, I've learnt to live with my unpopularity, it takes time, but you get over it.
Oh, not to mention his head, as Carter had kicked it in quite a lot since the crash. Alex really had begun to hate the guy, not that he'd ever liked him, but Carter had got it into his head that Alex was some kind of evil fortune teller. He was called the 'Freak' at school nowaday's. Even by Ms. Lewton. In English Class she ignored him and gave him 'F's at every opportunity. Nice.
Alex sighed and stood up. He was trying to write a story on the computer about this film that he was obsessed with. He had forgotten what it was called but he knew it was about this girl who just lived a normal life at this house in Lancaster and who never revised for any tests. His favourite part, was when the girl got into trouble for going past some chairs that said 'Exams' on them, and getting into trouble with the Language Teacher.
He knew he had been born with obsessive tendencies to his personality, but he didn't really care. He had the DVD of this particular film, the video, he had printed the whole script off the internet, he knew most of the script as well, he knew the cast list, he wrote stories and parodies and plays, basically everything you could possibly imagine.
He stared at the sea of words on the moniter screen. He had just written the part where the main character had got her Science SAT's exam the next day and instead of revising wrote stories on her computer.
Suddenly, there was a crash, and a something which sounded suspiciously like the shattering of glass.
"Hmm," Alex thought aloud. "That sounded suspiciously like the shattering of glass."
And low and behold, he was damn right. Alex turned around and noticed a brick on the floor. Calmly, he walked over to it and picked it up. There was a note on the brick, being held on by an elastic band. Carefully, he slipped it off and opened the note.
'Tell the future can you? Bet you didn't see that one coming,' the note read.
"Pathetic," Alex sighed to himself, shaking his head. "Oh well, I'll put it with the others."
He walked over to a shelf and placed the brick next to about ten other bricks, each one labelled with a date and time.
Alex jumped out of his skin. Who the hell was that calling him? Annoyed, he walked over to the window and stuck his head out. Immediately, another brick hit him in the face.
"Owwwww!" Alex yelled in agony. He looked down, to see Carter standing there, a smirk spread across his smarmy face. Carter scratched the back of his neck and laughed, pretending to be nervous.
"God damn it! I missed!"
"What do you want now Carter?" Alex replied pissily. (Yeah! My word!)
"I hope you don't think I'm rude or anything but-," Carter paused for dramatic effect. "-Can I have my brick back?"
"If that isn't the definition of cheekiness I don't know what is," Alex mused to himself. He walked back over to the shelf and picked up the latest installment to his collection. Then he threw it out of the window, without looking.
"Eh.." Alex sighed, past caring. "It probably missed."
He shut the window so no more bricks could try and get through and moved over to the door.
Suddenly, his alarm clock burst into life.
"9:25pm," the clock chanted. Alex glanced at his watch. It was only six fifteen. He looked at the liquid crystal display. The time was 1:80.
"Damn! I gotta get that fixed!"
Alex slammed the front door behind him and stepped over Carter's unconscious body. He had decided to pay a little visit on Carter Hort- Oh yeah, right, he's unconscious. Hang on, rewind... dniwer ,no gnaH .suoicsnocnu s'eh ,thgir ,haey hO -troH retraC no tisiv elttil a yap ot dediced dah eH.
Right. He had decided to pay a little visit on er...Tod...Yeah, that'll do.
"Tod!" Alex screamed at the top of his voice outside the front upstairs window. "Tod!"
A strange woman opened the window. "Sorry, you got the wrong house. The Waggner's live in New York, not Brazil."
"Oh, yeah, right, how silly of me," Alex replied, wishing he hadn't spent his life savings on the flight to South America. So off, he went, back to New York.
A few weeks later, he arrived at Tod's house. He cleared his throat, and prepared to shriek...but the window opened before he had a chance.
"Tod?!" Alex called hopefully.
"No, it's spiderman," Tod replied sarcastically, leaning out of the window. "Ermdaranmeyelldotellfa!" Alex yelled.
"Woah, Alex, slow down!"
"Erm da ran me yell dot ellfa."
"Think before you say each word."
"You broke a promise to your child!" Alex accused angrily.
"Oh, you mean little Jimmy?" Tod asked.
"No, I meant me," Alex said seriously.
"But you're not my-."
"Say it! Say you love me Daddy, and let the cider House rule!"
"What are you talking about?"
Alex started dancing around in circles at that point on Tod's front lawn. He started talking to himself in a french accent.
"Alex? You okay?" Tod persisted unsurely. "Shhhhh, you know my Dad'll freak if he finds out you're talking to me!"
"Nicole! Papa! Buy me a Renault Clio!"
"Alex! Shut up!" Tod shrieked at the top of his voice. Alex stopped suddenly. He reached into his pocket and put on a pair of glasses.
"Now can you promise me that no-one else is going to die?" He said. Tod opened his mouth, but he soon realised Alex wasn't talking to him. Alex removed the glasses and spoke normally again.
"No, as long as I'm in here it's out of my control I'm sorry."
He burst into hysterical fits of laughter then.
"Listen, Alex, I think I'm going to call the mental hospital..."
"Oh, don't do that, you're not crazy."
Tod sighed and rolled his eyes. He was getting close to closing the window and forgotting about his friend.
"Listen freak!" Tod cried out suddenly losing it. Alex shut up and stared itently up at him. "What is up with you? You're totally round the twist."
"Oh," Alex replied. "Don't get me started on that programme."
Tod shook his head and slammed the window. A few seconds later, he appeared in the doorway. He walked over to Alex.
"Look, dude, I know it's been difficult for you, what with being labelled a freak and all, but-."
"But you don't have to-."
"Look Tod," Alex said, sounding almost serious for once. "No friends and no fun makes Alex go-."
"Don't mind if I do!" Alex cried chasing Tod. Tod pegged it down the street, with Alex running full pelt after him. Tod saw a bin and threw it behind him in a pathetic attempt to trip his friend over. He jumped over a wall as quickly as he could, snagging his sweater in the process. Suddenly, he spied a skateboard. He leapt on it and skated off at top speed.
Meanwhile, Alex was on roller skates, and gaining on Tod, his arms outstretched liked some kind of maniac. Tod looked back, feeling panicky. He saw a little boy playing with his figures on the floor. Quick as a flash, Tod picked up the boy and threw him in Alex's way. Alex rode over the boy and lost control of the roller skates. Gradually, his legs went wider and wider apart until he was doing the splits. Then, he noticed he was heading straight for a lamp-post. With a smack, he landed one leg either side of it. Painful.
In the distance, Tod saw a ramp and feeling like being arrogant, he did a rocket air off the ramp and finished it with a 540 madonna. (Gay skateboarding moves) Unfortunately, he had never skateboarded before in his life and the only skateboarding experience he had was 'Tony Hawks Pro Skater,' a stupid skateboarding game, so, it was a pretty good bet that something was going to go wrong.
And low and behold, it did.
In his vain attempt to look like a cool dude instead of a lecherous geek donning a faded scratty stripy sweater, he slipped on the ramp and fell. He flew up into the air and grabbed a nearby tree branch for safety. But the skateboard, which hadn't been blessed with arms by the good lord, fell to it's untimely death. It snapped violently in half on the pavement. Tod wiped his brow with one hand.
"Glad that wasn't me!" he remarked unwisely. Without warning, the branch began to shake.
Alex stood beneath the tree laughing insanely.
"You can't stay up there forever!" he gloated. "Come down, so I can get you back for what you just did!"
"Never!" Tod shouted trying to sound heroic.
"Because of you I'll probably never be able to have children!" Alex yelled back, although secretly he was pleased. Who wanted to have an exact replica of him running around? Even he could see himself for what he really was. At that moment he caught sight of his reflection in a piece of tin-foil on the floor.
"Hi there handsome," he said to his reflection.
Tod hung on for dear life, wishing the branch wouldn't break and everything would be okay. But he should have known he wasn't that lucky.
It was about to get a lot, LOT worse. Suddenly, the sweater disintergrated and fell in pieces to the ground below. Alex laughed.
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Tod cried, letting go of the branch. He fell to the ground and landed on top of Alex.
"Ugh!" Alex shrieked. "Get off me you poof!"
"I'm not a poof!" Tod yelled. It really wasn't his lucky day though was it? Because a card fell out of his pocket at that minute. Alex snatched it up.
"Nothing, nothing," Tod replied trying to get it back. He wasn't quick enough.
"Wow, this time you really dropped your gay card," Alex smirked.
"So?" Tod flicked his hair out of his eyes.