Me: Okey-doke, here it is, my first Yami no Matsuei fic ever.

Muse: Took ya long enough.

Me: I didn't see you helping. Anyways, please read and review, and if you find any spelling errors please give me the heads up. I hate those, it's my #1 pet peeve.

Muse: Aren't you going to weird out the reviewers like you usually do?

Me: Silence! I'm trying to be nice for a change!

Muse: Run away before she steals your soul and sells it on e-bay!

Me: Ignore the muse in the background. Like I said, this is my first Yami no Matsuei fic, but now that I'm getting around to posting it, there's not much to talk about. I have about seven chapters of this so far, but now that I'm posting it I'm kinda wondering how long that lead will last. Oh well, on to business.

Disclaimer: I'm only gonna say this once, so listen up! I don't own Yami no Matsuei. You would not want me to own Yami no Matsuei. Odds are that you'd all die of unrealistic character torture before we even got close to the ending. I believe in happy endings, but I do love my character torture.

Pairings: Tsusoka is my ruling pairing. May have minor pairings later on if I feel like it.

Summary: Hisoka dissappeared for five years, and when Tsuzuki finally finds him again, he's pushing the other shinigami away more than ever. Is it true what they say about once bitten, twice shy?

Prologue

All was quiet at the Kurosaki home.

He could hear it all from below in the basement, a silence that seemed to sink deep into his very being. His emerald eyes peered into the gloom, trying hard to suppress his shaking. He hated the darkness, always had, but the silence was too much to bear, seeming to foreshadow awful things that his imagination produced seamlessly without any provocation from its owner.

He pulled his legs up to his chest and buried his face against them, his own darkness much more comforting to him than that which was around him. He continued to listen carefully for anyone that might come. Everyone always called him weak and selfish, and they were probably right, but he always made certain that they never caught him like this, always composed and ready. He hated them all, but most of all he hated to be considered weak, unworthy.

He looked up at the window, half caked with mud, finding small comfort in the moonlight streaming through. It was the only thing he could really see other than darkness, and for that he was grateful. He put his hand against the wall and used it to feel his way to that spot, sitting down just under the window and allowing himself to be bathed in it. He sighed deeply as the shaking stopped.

An idea came to him then, an idea so reckless that under normal circumstances he would instantly shy away from it. But tonight he felt daring and he had been in his prison for far too long. He stood up as though in a trance, balled up his fist and struck out at the window; shattering it instantly. Blood seeped out of several deep nicks in his knuckles, but he didn't care. He was numb to the pain.

He knocked the glass out of the frame; knowing and not caring that there would be hell for him to pay later. All that mattered now was getting out, breathing fresh air for the first time in what seemed like forever. He gripped the edge of the frame tightly and heaved himself out onto the grass outside, breathing heavily with excitement.

He slowly stood up on weak legs and surveyed the Sakura grove around him, fully intending to take advantage of this one small chance. He might never get an opportunity like this again; his father would be watching him much more closely once he found out about this. But he didn't care right now. The only thing that mattered was the fact that for the moment, he was out.

He brushed the blonde hair that hung carelessly around his face away from his verdant green eyes, wanting to make certain that his vision wasn't obscured by anything as he aimlessly wandered around the grove, wanting to engrave everything in his memories forever. He wasn't aware that he wasn't alone until he was only a short distance from a dark pair- a man and a woman- under one of the trees, embracing.

He scowled slightly at the sight. He couldn't catch any of their emotions from this distance, but he begrudged them nonetheless. In a strange way, he was happy that they had someone -something that he had never had- but he also felt a small pang of jealousy at their happiness. He could only hope that they realized how lucky they were to have a person that actually gave a damn about them.

He was just about to turn and leave before he caught a wave of emotion from the pair, catching his unguarded mind off-balance. He stumbled a little before catching himself; head throbbing in an instant migraine as he hastily threw up a shoddily-made mental barrier.

Stunned by the unexpected pain, he looked up in time to see the man, gripping the young woman with one arm, threw his other arm up into the air. As it arched down, he saw a flash of silver and realized in shock that the man held a knife in his hand. 'No!' His mind screamed out in shocked disbelief as the knife buried itself in the woman's chest.

Blood spurted, and all he could see was red. The moon burned crimson in the sky, so different from the silver orb that had given him such comfort only minutes before. His mind reverted to basic instinct at such an unnatural change. He wanted to run, needed to run, but his legs were frozen, even when the murderer turned, dropping the woman as he focused on the boy standing not so far away, and he caught a glimpse of silver hair and eyes.

'Run...' The man took a step toward him. 'Run...' He dimly heard a door slam open. 'Run!' He heard a vicious crash that broke through his thoughts, before everything turned into a crimson haze.

Hisoka Kurosaki jerked awake thoroughly drenched through with sweat as he tumbled out of bed and onto the floor, gasping as blood trickled down his brow. The nightmare had left him completely disorientated, and he found that his heart was beating rapidly and he was gasping frantically for breath.

"What hit me?" He thought inwardly as he jerkily stood on his shaky knees and stumbled into the bathroom to take a look at himself in the mirror.

He pushed his bangs back and probed the small cut just above his brow as his breathing slowly returned to normal. The cut quickly healed quickly and in mere seconds he was staring at smooth, unmarked ivory skin. Hisoka sighed deeply as he went back to his bedroom and sat down. "What caused all this?"

It was hard to tell. His room was a wreck: books strewn around, random objects off the shelves thrown on the floor. He was honestly shocked at the state of his normally tidy room, but this hadn't been the first time this had happened to him. He was naturally a bit of a neat freak, keeping his room free of all but the bare necessities, so he quickly picked things up and returned them to their proper places.

Hisoka sighed as he sat back down and looked at the only thing that had remained untouched in the room; a picture of him and his immature partner, Asato Tsuzuki. It was a picture taken from a year previously while they had both been at work. Hisoka was shouting in surprise as he tried to balance a stack of books when Tsuzuki randomly tackled him in an effort to help Saya and Yuma, the department heads from Hokkaido, get a good picture of the two of them.

Hisoka dug around in his twisted and sweat-soaked sheets for a few more minutes before he finally succeeded in finding the culprit; a small brass screw. He picked it up and looked at the blood and small amount of ripped skin on it, scratching the side of his head in puzzlement. "How'd this get here?"

The door creaked ominously, interrupting his thoughts. (1) Hisoka turned and noticed to his dismay that it was trapped in the wall, the brass knob buried in the plaster. He heaved, finally succeeding in pulling the door back out, grumbling as he thought of how he would have to fix the wall. A hinge caught his eye, nearly hanging off of the door since it was missing a screw. He bent down and slid the screw into the hole; it fit perfectly. Was he really that surprised?

"Ok, this night is just getting weird." Hisoka groaned to himself. "How did this happen and why is my wall now busted?" He reached out to grip the door, but his breath halted as his empathy surged to the front of his mind, allowing him to pick up a clairvoyant flash.

He saw that he was looking at himself a few minutes before. His clairvoyant self was thrashing on the bed, trapped in his nightmares as the door slammed open on its own in a surge of vicious energy, a screw flying clean out and hitting him on the brow. Hisoka realized that he was lucky the screw hadn't killed him, before remembering that he was already dead and normal accident held virtually no threat to him anymore.

Hisoka backed up, tripping on the leg of his oversized pajamas, and leaned against the wall behind him for support. The room, only moments before warm and comforting, was now cold and chilly. Hisoka felt the blood drain from his face as his nightmare came back to him, along with its ominous command: 'Run.'

"It couldn't be…" He muttered to himself as he stared at the door. Slowly, as if still unsure of himself, he reached out a hand and used it as a focus to do the same with his empathy. He slowly forced the emotions he always tried not to reveal on the door.

It slammed shut instantly. (2)

He stood there for a few minutes as the reality of it hit him full force. He thought of his room, completely wrecked after his much-more-vicious-than-normal nightmares, and the injury he had received as a result. If he could hurt himself through his nightmares, what could he unintentionally do to someone else?

Hisoka's mind whirled at a maddening pace at the thought of everyone at the Summons Department; Tatsumi, Watari, Wakaba, Terazuma, the Gushoushin twins, and most especially Tsuzuki. He could hurt them, without even knowing what he was doing…

"It's time to move on…" And those five words hurt more than anything else he had ever had to endure.

Morning dawned bright and cheery at the Summons Department of the Judgment Bureau, but Hisoka Kurosaki was nowhere to be found.

Author's Notes

(1). Cliched much? I think I've watched too many horror movies...

(2). Ok, I have no idea if Hisoka would actually be able to have a power like that, but do you remember back in Volume 1/ Episode 2 where Hisoka created that psychic blast and repelled Tsuzuki? I was kinda thinking something along the lines of that, just without the flashy light effects.

I know it's short, but it is only the prologue, right? Next chappie will be longer, plus that'll give me time to buff it up a bit, so bear with me ok?