Chapter 3 – Wolf in the Sheepfold

Alright, we have now moved up to the Marauders Era in Hogwarts. Have fun with the one and only Sirius Black.

And yes I know Andromeda is older than Sirius, but, this idea was too much fun to pass up. They are both in their 7th year at Hogwarts.

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Argus Filch grumbled as he stuck his head through the portrait entrance to the Gryffindor common room, "Black! Get over here! The Headmaster wants to see you."

Sirius Black shifted his girlfriend, well, his girlfriend for that particular week, winked at his crowd of worshippers and proclaimed, "Well ladies, I am a man with many demands on my time and so, I must be off," he turned to his 'girlfriend', "See you at supper tonight."

The remaining Marauders looked at each other, wondering which of the many unproven pranks that they had pulled in the last week that Sirius was going to get in trouble for. But then, since all four of them were not being called to go see the Headmaster, it probably had something to do with Sirius' many romantic adventures. None of the Marauders ever interfered in Sirius' encounters with the females of Hogwarts, or helped get him out of any of the trouble that he landed himself in because of said exploits.

Sirius trailed behind Filch as they walked to Ravenclaw Tower. When they got there, Filch called out and Andromeda Black came out to join them. She tried to ask Sirius what was going on, but as he didn't know he just shrugged. Andromeda usually didn't get in trouble, well, nothing compared to Sirius anyways, so what in Merlin's name was going on?

The three of them walked down to the entrance hall. Filch started to explain the reason the two of them were there, but he was interrupted by a sudden shower of dark brown smoke coming out of one of the closets near the entrance hall.

"Dungbombs!" Filch called, "When I get my hands on those little filthy students, I'll..." he stopped that particular comment when he realized that the two Black's were still there, "You two are going on different exchange trips. The Headmaster thought it would improve inter-school relations. Mrs. Black goes in the first carriage to Beauxbatons, Mr. Black, you get the second one going to Durmstrang."

Andromeda and Sirius looked at each other with pained expressions and groaned. Sirius whined, "How long is this stupid exchange? How long will I have to be locked up in an all male school with those masochistic Russian idiots?"

Andromeda expressed similar concerns, "I'm stuck at a school with half witted French butterflies. At least Durmstrang has been known to send its students on field trips."

Then Sirius' eyes lit up. While his face slipped into a grimace of fake endurance, his eyes kept that gleam, "Right then Andy, I'm going," he stepped into the first carriage.

Andromeda's eyes also lit up as she realized the plan, and stepped up into the second carriage, "Right then…off we go."

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Sirius stepped out of the carriage onto a gravel path that led to a dainty white crystal castle. The next thing he saw was a tiny old woman. She gasped, "You are not a woman! Are you?"

Sirius patted his chest and looked down, "Madam, I assure you, that I am quite male."

The third thing he noticed (and perhaps most importantly of all to him), was the rows of beautiful French girls. He winked at a slender blond in the back row. She blushed.

The tiny woman coughed out, still outraged, "I am Madame Carré, Headmistress of Beauxbatons Academy of Magic. I do not mean to offend you, but well, we were expecting a Ms. Black. Could you explain to us why Ms. Black is not here?"

Sirius bowed low, took Madam Carré hand and kissed it, "I am Mr. Black. It would seem that my cousin and I accidentally got taken to each other's school. My cousin, Ms. Andromeda Black, is apparently, on her way to Durmstrang."

He then looked behind him and noticed that the carriage had left, "It would seem that my ride has left. I guess I'll be required to remain as a guest at your beautiful school for the reminder of this exchange."

Between the speech, the hand kissing and the general flattery, Madame Carré would have done anything Sirius requested, "So it would seem. You are welcome to spend the next two weeks at our school. I shall see to it we change around the arrangements to suit the new, situation. It would not be proper for you to reside in the seventh year dorms as I had originally planned."

She swept away, with the rows of students following after her. The blonde lingered a moment and blew a kiss to Sirius.

When she turned her back, Sirius grinned.

This was certainly better than early morning dips in nearly frozen Russian lakes. It was going to be a very cozy couple of weeks.

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Sirius' Journal

Day 1, Monday

8:00-9:30 - Charms. Of the magical variety not the female variety, which is a pity. Found out that the blonde's name is Marie-Antoinette. I spent most of the class explaining to her some of the more simple charms. Of course, the best way to demonstrate the wand movements required is to stand behind your student and wrap your arms the student.

9:30-11:00 - Care of Magical Creatures. Apparently the largest part of the class curriculum is the study of unicorns. I can't touch the creatures, so I spent the entire class watching the girls.

11:00-1:00 - Lunch Break. Marie is a very pretty blusher. And an even better kisser.

I've discovered that the school is definitely lacking in discrete corners for 'extra curricular activities'.

Day 4, Thursday

Care of Magical Creatures again. Sat down on the fence outside the unicorn enclosure. It seems to be the best place since the unicorns try to kill me every time I try to come in the padlock. When Marie tried to pet one of the unicorns today it nearly stabbed her. I guess that's my fault.

Day 5, Friday

The thing about being in an all girls school is that information travels fast. Apparently Marie has found about Alexandria and vice versa. Am now short minus both girlfriends.

Day 6, Saturday - Weekly Tally

Girlfriends lost: 4

Girlfriends gained: 7

Girls no longer able to enter unicorn paddock: 12

Day 7, Sunday

Andromeda sent a letter.

I'm definitely enjoying Durmstrang. Since I am the only female that most of them have seen all semester I am always the center of attention. I don't have to carry my books, do my homework or…well anything really. I don't actually have much to do now that I think about it. They even volunteer to beat each other up for me. The professors have respectively requested that I tell the guys that violence makes me ill and that I really don't like them fighting over me. Other than that, I have learnt some really interesting little hexes that would come in very useful next time you decide to be 'a loving cousin'.

From you cous

Andy Black

Day 8, Monday

The Headmistress told me that I am no longer allowed to enter any of the dormitories. She found me, some of the sixth years and some of that really delightful French champagne on the floor of one of the dorms this morning. I looked smug and happy. The girls looked ashamed and satisfied. The champagne bottles looked very empty (well they were quite empty).

Day 9, Tuesday

Bad News: Apparently Headmistress' requests are enforced by alarm bells that go off if I decide to enter the dorms.

Good News: I found a bathroom that has a really nice hot tub. Might come in handy.

Day 10, Wednesday

During Care of Magical Creatures I sat on one side of the fence and twenty three girls sat down on the other side. None of them would look at me. Surely I couldn't have been that busy - I don't even remember some of their names.

On the other hand, I do remember something about them that causes me to wonder where the other eighteen of them were.

Day 11, Thursday

Decided to stop attending CoMC's

The glares from females sitting on the fence are starting to get really scary, and they're growing exponentially.

I have better things to do.

The professor is very attractive and it will definitely be problematic if I start flirting with her with all the fence sitters looking on.

Day 12, Friday

I believe that is the first time I have ever…well in my defense she's only four years older than me. I have definitely opened a can of worms. Is there anyone I won't do? Well, probably, I just haven't found them.

Day 13, Saturday

I think I am going to stay in my room today. No classes and all that jazz. I swear it has nothing to do with the fact that there are three girls outside my door who are suggesting my dismemberment. It is amazing that French can sound beautiful during both sex and battle. Wait…they so did not just suggest that! I would rather keep that bit intact.

That one just sounds painful…Is that even physically possible? Well, I guess if you do it that way it's both possible and really painful.

Day 14, Sunday - Weekly count- in

Girlfriends gained 23

Girlfriends lost 22

Current number of girlfriends 4

Percentage of above age students that I have not flirted with 23

Oh Merlin, I wonder how long I can continue this. I am feeling a wee bit tired.

I go home tomorrow. Rest at last.

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Two carriages touched down outside Hogwarts simultaneously. The door to the first one opened and Sirius Black swaggered out. Andromeda Black swung out of the second one.

They looked at each other and shrugged.

Sirius sighed, "I didn't know that heaven could be so hellish."

Andromeda laughed, "Amen! How was your two weeks?"

"I don't want to talk about it. What about yours?"

"Don't even ask. There are some things that are better off not said."

They walked back into Hogwarts together, with similar looking swaggers.