Disclaimer: Yes I own all the Harry Potter characters and anything to do with them…. It's not true unfortunately…otherwise I wouldn't mind owning Rodolphus, Lucius….Sirius….Just to name a few….
I also don't own the fantastic song "Talk Back Trembling Lips" by Daniel O'Donnell…Makes you pity Rodolphus in this I think…it really does.
A/N: This is set in Bella and Rod's seventh year…Lucius is also in their year (despite the canon timeline I know but this just fits…) and Cissa is a year below them.
Broken Hearts Mending
"Lestrange, I can't go with you." Bellatrix Black, the love of my life said coldly to me the morning of the Christmas Ball. I took a deep breath and tried to keep my voice steady.
"What do you mean you can't go with me Bella? You said you would!" I questioned, my heart feeling as though it would burst at her announcement.
"I just don't want to, you have to deal with that." She stood there staring at me as if she was going to say something further. I waited on baited breath, hoping she would reconsider. At that moment it was all that I could do keep the tears from falling from my eyes. I knew at that moment I would never have her and that thought hurt terribly.
"F-Fine, I-I understand." I finally muttered in reply, hoping the tremor in my voice wasn't noticeable. I noticed Lucius cringe off to my side and I realized that it probably was. I knew I shouldn't just stand there, I should show some dignity and pride as a Slytherin and walk away but I felt as though if I was to move I would fall over.
"See you later, Lestrange." She replied before turning away and walking over to sit with her sister Narcissa who started whispering furiously to her.
"Tough break, Rodolphus." Lucius muttered in my ear, "Though, I wonder what made her change her mind. According to Cissa, she hasn't been this happy in ages. Maybe she is scared." Lucius shot me a smirk and punched me lightly on my arm.
"Bella? Scared? Are we talking about the same person here?" I turned incredulously to my best friend who sometimes seemed to have no idea what he was talking about. He just shrugged before leading me out of the common room, I shot one last glance at Bella as I was pulled out of the door and I could swear she was watching me. I felt as though my heart was shattered, completely and utterly beyond repair. This was not something I could brush aside easily. I knew I loved that girl and I knew I had to get her back no matter what.
Talk back trembling lips, shaky legs don't just stand there
Don't let her know that she's gettin' through to you
Talk back trembling lips, burning eyes don't start crying
Heart don't let her know that you're breaking in two.
"Rodolphus, come on man! You can't stay out here all night!" Lucius whispered fiercely to me as I stood out side the Great Hall that night of the Christmas Ball.
"Why not? It is not like Bella is going to suddenly want to be with me. I do not want to see her with anyone else thankyou very much." I turned away from Lucius as I folded my arms across my chest.
"That's just the point! She isn't with anyone! Come you have to see!" I allowed myself to be dragged inside by Lucius. I had spent the hours since Bella's announcement brooding in my room. The more minutes that went by the more bitter I felt, part of the reason I didn't want to go in was the fact I knew I would say something I would regret in my anger.
"Bella, this is Rodolphus, I'm sure you two have met before." Lucius introduced with a sweep of his hand before walking quickly over to Cissa. The two of us stood there staring at each other for what seemed like an age.
"Where is your date then, Bella?" I asked coolly, "I must meet this person that was so good you had to refuse me to go with." I raised an eyebrow at her waiting for an answer.
"What makes you think there was someone else, Lestrange?" she replied smoothly, but I could see the uncertainty in her eyes which betrayed her. "Maybe I just didn't want to go with you, did that thought ever occur to you?" she sniped folding her arms triumphantly as if that won the argument. Cissa discretely slapped her arm and looked pointedly at her, a look however that she refused to acknowledge.
"You are a terrible tease Bellatrix Black! I should think no one would want to be near you at all! I don't know what I was thinking!" I snapped back, stepping closer to her. All my jealously and spite which had built up all day burst out at her now. We didn't notice half the room stop and stare at us as our fight escalated.
"A tease am I? Says the man who probably went straight to the next girl after this morning!" She accused, her eyes blazing as she stepped forward herself.
"Excuse me? I have some honour, Bella! As you can see I am with no one else am I?" I retorted, slightly shocked that she would think such a thing.
"It's true Bella," interjected Lucius, "He spent the whole day up in his room moping."
"Shut up Lucius!" I hissed through clenched teeth, trying to fight down the blush that threatened to take over my face.
"Aww, did I hurt your feelings, Lestrange?" she mocked me cruelly, "Did I break your heart? Can't take a rejection your head is so overflated with your ego!" Her face was inches from mine as she yelled in my face. Despite my anger and annoyance, I could not help but notice how beautiful she was when she was angry, the shivers and sparks that ran through me whenever her eyes blazed with passion no matter what she was talking about. However as her insult sunk in I snapped back to reality.
"You can't hurt me Black!" I spat, "Your words mean nothing to me. I didn't really want to go with you anyway so I suppose it worked out for the better." I replied casually, ignoring the three pairs of wide eyes before me. The discovery that Bella was shocked at what I said, was extremely surprising, and even more so was the hurt I thought I saw there in her eyes but it was gone almost a moment later so I dismissed it as the creation of my hopeful mind. I chose to pretend her words meant nothing to me but in reality they put another stake into my already broken heart. I knew I couldn't take much more of this, but feigning indifference was a good way of pretending she never hurt me at all.
"What?" she almost whispered.
"You heard me." I replied coldly. "You aren't the only one who doesn't care about us."
"You are a real idiot you know that!" she snapped suddenly as she stepped back from me. I then said the thing I had been hoping I wouldn't let slip the whole night.
"Well I must be because I love you so much!" I shouted in her face. The whole hall fell silent at my announcement. I studied the look on her face as it sank in to both of us what I had just said, but I tore my eyes away from her, not willing to see the cold malice I knew was probably sitting there.
Lestrange what is wrong with you! I berated myself; you just gave her fodder for our next argument! Good one!
Silence ensued between us as neither of us seemed to know what to do then at that moment.
Everyday our love's a battle royal
Dear, it seems that fighting's all we ever do
But if I let you know how much I love you
You'll do things to me you shouldn't do.
Every time you up and hurt my feelings
I pretend it couldn't matter less
But I'm just hiding all of my emotions
Behind my broken heart I guess.
I felt my heart almost stop as Bella opened her mouth to speak. I can't take this if she turns me down now. I really can't. I thought miserably as I waited for the worst. I resisted the urge to wipe away the sweat I knew had beaded on my face. I must look a wreck.
Bella closed her mouth and turned her head towards Cissa who gave her a slight push in my direction.
"Go on! Tell him!" I thought I heard her hiss to her sister.
Don't let her see how much this affects you Rodolphus! I urged myself to keep the mask of indifference on my face.
"Rodolphus?" she began, her voice almost a whisper. Ah! I sighed inwardly; I love the sound of my name on her lips.
"Y-Yes?" I found myself replying stiltedly. I cursed myself for my trembling. This was not a good time to show any weaknesses in front of her.
You already told her you love her, how much worse could it get? A voice from the back of my mind pointed out to me.
"I can't, I can't-" she began seemingly stumbled over her words. I took a shark intake of breath as I waited for her to deliver a crushing blow to my heart. I felt Lucius come up next to me and grip my arm. I shot him a grateful look before turning back to Bella as she started speaking again.
"I can't believe you said that! I've been waiting for you to say that for so long!" she practically shouted at me as she came up to me, pushing Lucius out of the way. She shoved my shoulder as she continued ranting. "I thought you didn't even like me!"
"W-What?" I stuttered, hardly daring to believe what she had just said, no, shouted to me. "How could you have even thought that I didn't like you!" I asked curiously as I brought my hands around her wrists tentatively. She shrugged, then suddenly noticed that everyone around was waiting on every word we said.
"Perhaps we should move this conversation outside." She whispered as she took my arm.
"Yes, lets go." And with that we walked quickly out of the Great Hall amidst the sighs of disappointment of the gathered crowd who reluctantly went back to their own dancing. Once we were outside of the castle doors, the cool evening wind whistling around us, I turned to Bella and grabbed her hands.
"Now what's this about you thinking I never liked you?" I asked curiously, inside I felt like soaring, I couldn't believe this had turned out the way it had. I had already prepared myself for an evening of feeling sorry for myself. A light blush rose in Bella's cheeks. I couldn't help but smile, she looked so beautiful when she was nervous.
"I-I don't know…I overheard A-Avery talking to Nott last night saying you were playing with me, a mere bet to see who could snare me first. I was so mad! I couldn't even see straight!" She said exasperatedly, her voice getting heated. She paused and took a couple of deep breaths before continuing. "That's why I turned you down this morning." At some point during her explanation my mouth fell open.
"Avery and Nott are going to die, you realise that?" I replied nonchalantly. She looked at me curiously.
"You mean there was no bet?" I stepped closer to Bella, sliding my hands further up her arms so they rested on her elbows.
"No, Bella! Not ever! I have no idea what they are even talking about!" I replied earnestly, "Maybe they were hoping to ensnare you…and were plotting to get me out of the way." I grinned slyly as Bella laughed half-heartedly.
"Sad to say that almost worked, and they didn't even do anything! It was all because of my stupidity! All I had to do was ask Lucius, he would have told me straight."
"I'm sorry, Rodolphus." She implored, looking perhaps the most vulnerable I had ever seen her. My eyes softened as I gazed at her, my heart truly captivated by her shimmering grey eyes and long silky black hair.
"You know I never thought you would be able to get to me as much as you did. I was a total wreck after this morning." I whispered to her as I ran my hands through her hair. She grinned at me, relief evident in her eyes that I had forgiven her.
"Really? I don't want you to start crying on me now, Rodolphus." she replied as she stepped closer.
"I don't think my heart could take another beating like that, Bella." I whispered as our lips were a hairs breadth away.
"Merlin, I love you too!" she replied fervently as she close the gap between our lips. I wrapped my arms around her tightly, folding her into my robes as the wind took a turn for the chilly as we stood outside passionately embracing for what seemed an age. A warm sensation stole through me as she ran her hands through my hair; I knew it was the feeling of the broken pieces of my heart mending.