I watched the fire intently. A fire that is controlled is a safe one; while on the other hand, a fire that is let lose to run free can cause major chaos and mass destruction. I now wondered if perhaps I was a wild fire causing a major disruption or if it was the Volturi who needed to be contained. I knew what I was fighting for but I didn't know if it made it right. The Volturi had been selfish for so long, commanding me around like a puppet to carry out their orders. Would I be forgiven for finally doing what I wanted for once or would I be looked down upon whenever I crossed another vampire? Would they look at me and sneer or cower in fear afraid that I will take their life out of nothing but pure game? When I looked into the mirror or a puddle of water on the floor, would I know who I had become? Could I look at myself and be and thing, "you did the right thing; you did what should have been done a long time ago".
Love really will make people do crazy things. Love can turn an emotionless machine into an affectionate and personable being. It gives life to that who have lost it and that's what had happened to me. In one aspect with me being a vampire, I had lost life. I don't breathe or age but instead I just live on and on for all of eternity watching the living. However, in an emotional and mental sense, I was dead as well. The Volturi had sucked out any piece of life that I had left in me. They took the last thing that truly made me who I was before I became this monster. They took the very last bit of humanity away from me, something that the Cullen's had given me back. So I did have the right to stand up to the Volturi. I did have the right to move into the Cullen's household and gain that humanity back. I wanted to be loved and to love someone. I wanted a family. I wanted a tender touch, a raspy voice to whisper in my ear, a gentle caress on my cheek. For so long I thought I was this stone. I believed I was perfect. I knew that nothing could ever stop me from completing a mission. And then there was love and once I encountered it, I lost completely and miserably to it.
I learned I could be human and that just because I was a vampire there was still some humanity left in me, I just needed to find it. I would not lose it and Aro wanted to take it from me.
I will kill him.
I will kill him for everything he has taken from me, for all the things he lied to me about, for all the things he used me to do, for the monster he created me to be, for threatening me new family, and for trying to take away my true love. I will not allow it. I will kill myself if he takes the Cullen's from me. If they go, I will go.
I didn't know how far the Volturi was going to take this. Would they send more people to try and convince me to come back "home" or was Aro just going to let things be. I had no more answers at this point. Everything was new to me. The Volturi never trained me for a situation like this. Usually if a member or the Volturi went rogue, they were terminated. With no questions asked. But I was far too strong and valuable.
Miles away I heard a twig snap and quick movement and yet my mind was still in a daze, my senses still on edge, and my thoughts continued to run rampant. All I could see before me was the blazing fire and the flames dancing in every which way. I just thought that if I were to die, this would be my grave. And yet it was calming. Anywhere, even under the burning touch of a flame, would be better than under the care or the Volturi.
Suddenly there was a loud crack from high in the sky and then I felt the first water droplet fall onto my face. The usual forecast in Forks but it was still surprising considering for the last hour and a half there had been no rain allowing the fire to burn what was left of Jane's body. The running footsteps were closer now, probably less than a mile away. For some reason I wasn't alarmed this time. I couldn't seem to snap out of my trance. My eyes glued to the dying fire and my mind on calculating the Volturi's next move. The smell of rain was just so calming and the music that the thunderstorms just put me into this very relaxed mood. The coolness of the rain helped to calm my nerves and so there was nothing right now that bothered me. Not even the person that had stopped running and I knew stood two yards from me. Somehow I just knew it wasn't threatening. Hesitantly, the person began to speak.
"I know, Bella, that you had asked me not to come. I know why and I do understand why you requested that but I can't. As soon as you left, I lost a piece of me. You're part of my family and much more. You are my everything, Bella. If I have to live for an eternity, I want to do it with you. "
Suddenly, I felt pressure along my back and arms wrapped around my body as a face nudged itself into the side of my neck. Edward pushed my drenched hair to the side and ran his nose up and down my neck. I felt chills climb up my spine when his lips gently met my neck. His kiss was so fast and light that I almost thought that I was imagining things. He turned me around and looked deep into my eyes.
"I will not lose this and I will do anything I can to keep it. I think we both deserve this if we have to live for an eternity don't you, Bella?"
He was so close to me, both of us drenched, our clothes practically see through. Our eyes staring deeply into the others reading every single thought and feeling that went through the others head. Our bodies were pressed tightly around one another and our arms wrapped tightly around one another. We were both breathing heavily despite the fact that we didn't need to breathe.
This is when I realized that this feeling was more than love. We were more than soul mates. In every sense of the word, Edward was my other half. Without him, I was incomplete. I needed him for support and comfort. We were, without a doubt, made purposely for one another. It took us many years to find each other but now that we did, it was impossible to lose, let alone leave the other for even a short period of time. Without our other half, we couldn't live. Without any further hesitation I answered Edward's question with such firmness I knew that he would know that I knew exactly what he meant.
"Yes, Edward, we do."
All I remember is one second I was staring deeply into Edward's beautiful ocher eyes and the next his body pressed against me tightly when he threw me against a tree, his mouth never leaving mine and his hands exploring my body in a magical way. For the first time we could express everything we truly felt for one another. Ironically enough, we only had the strength to do it when there was pending doom.
There was a beautiful mix of passion and force and our bodies entangled around one another. We could become one easily and with such fluid motion that it there was no doubt we were meant to be. Never in my life had I felt so much love or care. Every motion, every caress, and every kiss that Edward gave me sent my head spinning and begging for more. I had never felt so comfortable in my life as I felt his body all over me.
Finally, he pulled away and stared into my eyes. He looked so sad and vulnerable. He looked away for a brief second and then looked back at me; his mind seemed to be lost in thought. I brought my hand to his face, cupped his chin, and ran my thumb across his face.
"I know what you're thinking, Edward, and you're wrong. This was not just because we had a moment. This was real. You and I are inseparable. Without you, I am nothing. I can not live my life without you and nor can I fight the Volturi alone. I won't win if I do."
His eyes seemed to clear up and his eyebrows relaxed and a much happier and relaxed feeling seemed to have taken over Edward when I said that. Suddenly out of nowhere a huge grin played across his god like face. He pulled me up and helped me gather our things.
"Then you'll be happy to know that none of us could leave you, Bella, and so everyone came!"
My eyes widened in horror.
"EVERYONE? And you let us go on this emotional roller coaster for how long while your family is waiting for you to bring to where ever they are waiting?"
"Bella don't worry about it. Everyone knows you're a difficult person to talk to about things that you've already set your mind to. We'll just tell them we had a little fight and things got physical."
I eyed him questioningly.
"We had a little fight and things got physical?"
He laughed and his ocher eyes never looked so amused or playful. He was so beautiful. He walked towards me and my body started to tingle with the thoughts of what happened the last time he walked up to me. His hand reached toward me and my body started to go wild, my breathing starting to go heavy again. His hand reached toward my face, his eyes still sparkling with amusement. He put his mouth right up to my ear and cupped the back of my head.
"You're a little too dirty to have just gotten in an argument."
He pulled back and pulled a leaf from my hair. His smile was wicked and I gawked at him. He then pointed to the dirt stains on our clothes and then lastly rolled up my long sleeve to show the dirt on my skin. I must have looked horrified because Edward began to howl in laughter.
"So we wrestled a little. No one will ever know."
I glared at him. There is no way that they couldn't know. I'm sure that they all knew by now and they hadn't even seen me! As soon as they would catch a glimpse of us I just knew there would be ridicule and humiliation to follow. I rolled my eyes and then stared back at Edward.
"I love you, you know that?"
At first he looked as if I caught him off guard and then he cocked his head to the side and his face was gone of any humor.
"I do know that, Bella. And I'm doing everything I can to keep you."
I walked toward him and planted a little kiss on his cheek.
"Then take me to OUR family."
He smiled at me and shook his head from side to side.
"I thought you'd never ask."