With Love Comes Pain

Author: Laura Kenobi

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, I don't own Star Wars. I do, however, own any original characters, planets, etcetera that I created for this story.

Archive: Please contact me first!

Comments/Reviews: You can email me through my profile, and you can always leave a review!

Author's Notes: ((italics)) represents thoughts and "/ italics /" represents communication through the Force.

This story was first published in its original version on July 17, 2001. In July 2005, I decided that since four years had passed and my skills as a writer had undoubtedly improved since this story was first written and posted, it might be refreshing to return to this story and give it a fresh look and an update. For the most part the overall story remains the same - my goal has been to improve on and expand on the original, so I hope the result will prove enjoyable to all of you who are wonderful enough to read and review. The version of this story below is the updated version. Call it the "Special Edition" version of this story.

Ginger, you are too sweet! Thank you, my friend!Here's the last chapter!

This chapter is mostly to explain a little about Obi-Wan's mother... I couldn't resist a nice fluffy ending, I guess. The feedback for this story has been astounding – thank you so much! I can't tell you how much I appreciate all of your reviews!

Summary: When a mission goes dreadfully wrong, Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn must deal with the possibility of loosing his Padawan Learner...

Chapter Five

Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi returned to their quarters after a sparring session, sweaty and exhausted. Qui-Gon noticed with amusement that his Padawan's hair was spiking in all different directions. He stifled his laughter and patted Obi-Wan on the shoulder.

"I believe, Padawan, that you could use a shower."

Obi-Wan's face contorted in mock-anger.

"Oh? I believe it is you, Master, who needs a shower..."

Smiling, both men entered the common room of their quarters and Obi-Wan took a seat on the couch. Qui-Gon looked at him questioningly.

"I'm waiting for you to take a shower, Master." The young man's mirth was barely contained. Qui-Gon chuckled and took a turn for the shower. He had taken barely three steps, however, when his apprentice's serious voice reached his ears.

"Master, did you ever know your mother?"

Qui-Gon was momentarily startled. What had prompted such a question from Obi-Wan? He turned and moved around to sit in a chair opposite his apprentice.

"No, Padawan, I did not." He had never known anything about his family.

Obi-Wan looked wistful.

"Why do you ask, Padawan?" Qui-Gon probed the young man gently, sensing that something had happened to bring Obi-Wan to ask.

Obi-Wan turned thoughtful eyes to his Master's curious face.

"I only met my mother once." Obi-Wan's eyes glazed over momentarily, seemingly in remembrance.

Qui-Gon didn't know what to say. "Padawan, you've never met your mother." Qui-Gon wondered what in he world had made Obi-Wan think he had met Leila. He looked at Obi-Wan for a response.

The younger man smiled. "But I did, Master. She spoke to me while Healer Mooral was healing my mind. She was..." he remembered the words she had spoken, "offering me my choices. She only told me at the end that she was my mother."

Qui-Gon sighed, suddenly lose in memories of his own. How he missed her...

"Master?" Obi-Wan was surprised at the lack of response from the Master.

"Yes, Padawan. I'm just dwelling on past memories. I apologize."

Realization sparked in Obi-Wan's eyes.

"Did you know my mother?" Hope burned deep in his blue/green eyes. Qui-Gon smiled.

"Yes, young one, I did."

Obi-Wan opened his mouth to, Qui-Gon suspected, ask a question, but his words ended up jumbling together and all that came out was a groan of frustration.

"She was a wonderful friend, Obi-Wan. You remind me of her, although you have your father's features." He grinned at Obi-Wan's unblinking eyes. "She and I were the best of friends, though she was older than I. We went on many missions together; that's how she met your father."

Qui-Gon remembered the secret wedding. He had been the only guest. He had never known if anyone knew, even now.

"Your father died a few months before you were born, and I think being pregnant was the only thing that kept your mother's spirits up. I remember when you were born, Padawan... she was happier than I had ever seen her. She couldn't stop talking about how she had the most beautiful son in the galaxy..."

"What happened to her?" Obi-Wan breathed, completely enraptured in the story, "How did she die?"

Qui-Gon lowered his eyes momentarily, and when he spoke his voice was laced with sorrow.

"The strain of giving birth... three days after you were born she developed complications and..."

Qui-Gon felt strange telling Obi-Wan this, but it was his right to know, was it not?

"It was my fault." the irrational words escaped from the sixteen-year-old's lips before he could stop them. Grief and guilt swept through him, clouding his thoughts.

Qui-Gon leapt to his feet and seized his Padawan's chin in his left hand, a more violent action than he intended. Obi-Wan flinched and looked up at the tall Master in surprise.

"No, my Padawan, it was not your fault. You were a child born from love, and born to a loving mother! Leila never blamed you, so do not blame yourself. You were a newborn, Padawan, a baby. How could you have done anything? Don't ever think that way, Obi-Wan Ke…"

Suddenly, Qui-Gon realized that Obi-Wan's eyes were as big as giant marbles, and that the younger man was trembling slightly under his Master's hand. He quickly pulled his hand away and closed his mouth. Obi-Wan looked shocked.

"Padawan..." the tall Jedi was at a loss for words.

"No apology, Master. I'm just sorry I upset you so much..."

Qui-Gon sighed. "So that look of utter terror you just had on your face had nothing to do with me startling you?"

Obi-Wan looked uncomfortable. "Well... you did startle me."

Taking Qui-Gon by surprise, the apprentice suddenly threw his arms around his mentor and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you, Master."

"For what, Padawan?" Qui-Gon couldn't imagine what he had done to deserve such affection.

"You're the only father figure I have ever known. I understand it must be hard for you to look at me and think of my mother, but you never stop. You're always there when I need you... I think she must be very pleased."

Qui-Gon's heart melted with those words, and pride for Obi-Wan filled his soul. ((Oh, Obi-Wan...)) He had never heard such perfect words.

He could not say anything, so he just sent Obi-Wan feelings of thanks and love through their bond. His apprentice returned the feelings in a flurry of happiness.

"But Master... there is one thing..." Obi-Wan's eyes were now twinkling as he pulled out of the embrace.

Qui-Gon looked up into his Padawan's happy eyes.

"You really should learn to take my advice and take a shower!"

"Padawan!" Qui-Gon grabbed his towel off the side of the chair and whipped it half-heartedly at the nearly hysterical young man.

"Well then, when Master Yoda arrives for dinner you can explain to him why you are not showered. He should be here in," Qui-Gon glanced at the digital readout on the wall, "about twenty minutes..."

"Master!" Obi-Wan shrieked through his laughter. He quickly grabbed the towel from Qui-Gon and made a dash for the shower as Qui-Gon did not try to contain his amusement...

The End!

I just had to end this on a happy note... I couldn't help it! A million thanks to all of you for reading and reviewing! It always brings a smile to my face, and makes me want to write more! Thank you so much!

- Laura