Ansaphone

by Galinda05

"Hey there, you've reached the Summers Residence -"

"Slayer! What're you doing, pet?"

"Shh! Which is the home to pretty much everyone in Sunnydale, so -"

"Buffy, that's so negative! You're so negative!"

"Dawn! Which is the home of pretty much -"

"How did I end up little sister to someone so negative! Ugh!"

"You know, nibblet's got a point, love."

"Spike! Dawn! Both of you - shut it!"

"Don't get your panties in a twist, slayer."

"Hey, what's going - did someone say panties and slayer in the same sentence?"

"Xander, you look way too interested for your own good."

"Well, sorry Buffster, but a guy's just gotta ask."

Shriek

"They're blue, mate."

Smack

"Ouch, she's playing mean."

"Blue? I want to see this for myself!"

"Xander, if you want to keep your other eye, I suggest you do not -"

"Hey, what do 'ya know, they are -"

Smack

"Nice one, Dawnie!"

"Did you just hit Xander?"

"Oh, Anya, hi, I just, umm, yes?"

"You little -"

Smack

"Sorry, slayer reflex. Saw an ex-demon heading for my sister."

"Oh, so now you wanna play dirty!"

"Chick fight!"

"KENNEDY!"

"Sorry, couldn't resist."

Smack

"Ahn! What was that for?"

"I'm reasserting my position in our relationship. I heard Jerry Springer talking about it."

Scream

"Yep, still blue."

"Spike! I swear to God! Soul or no soul, I will not hesitate to stake you!"

"Gonna slay me, are you love?"

"Well, I am the slayer."

"Wouldn't you rather just shag?"

Thud

Crash

"Buffy! Don't hit him! He has a soul! And, he's cute!"

"DAWN!"

"What, I'm just saying!"

"Speaking your mind, Dawn. That's a good thing."

"Xander! Don't encourage her!"

"So, you like it rough, do 'ya slayer?"

Thud

Crash

"Come on, Buffy. You beating on Captain Peroxide? This isn't even a fair fight!"

"Oh, shut up eye-patch boy. Go get yourself a parrot."

Smack

Smack

Thud

"Look, if you wanna fight, I am the slayer, so -"

THUD!

"Dog pile!"

"DOG PILE!"

Footfalls

"Hey, look! A dog pile!"

"What 'cha doing under there, B?"

"Wow! A real dog pile! Just like the fight in X-Men number thirty-five when Wolverine -"

"Alright, geek boy, that's enough."

Thud

"Faith! What was that for?"

Thud " -Figured I join in on the fun!"

"Fight! Fight! FIGHT!"

"KENNEDY!"

"SORRY!"

Series of thuds, crashes

Thud

CRASH!

"Everyone, I swear to Hecate, I will-"

Click

Beeeeeeeeeep

-

Angel blinked a few time. "Umm, hi, Buffy, are you guys, uhh, okay? And was that Spike?"