57Disclaimer: I don't own neither the Ouran High School Host Club manga or anime.
Chapter 1: Death
It was a very beautiful day, like one of those good late summer days, the sun had being shining brightly all day long yet the wind, cool and strong refreshed the room and the chattering children in them. Classes were normal with the humming of people around, the sheer happiness of young ones with no worries or pains to cry about. Haruhi heard them while taking notes upon notes about today classes, everything went normal; everything went perfectly okay.
Breakfast at home alone as always, Dad had being dog tired and snored soundly in his bed, she got to school in time, the first classes passed by quickly, she had some time between classes to study a few books Kyoya had borrowed for her (she wondered if she would have to pay for them), a few lovely girls gave her some otorou (expensive tuna) for lunch, later on the host club was busy as ever playing lady-killers, giving brief air kisses, holding their maiden's in their arms when they were about to melt. And then she went back to classes not noticing the upcoming storm.
It was around 11, she would recall some time later when someone asked her, because she was thinking how long till she could go shopping for supper, when her homeroom teacher came to her classroom and called for her. She walked towards her teacher having a bitter taste on her mouth, she wondered if she had eaten way too much otorou for lunch, not finding weird her teacher's pale complexion, worried face or the way her eyes never met Haruhi's.
"Fujioka-kun there has being a terribly unfortunate event, we received a call from your father's work place, and it seems he had a car accident, they have rushed him in to a hospital…" Haruhi gasped, cold sweat running through her forehead, her mind trying to decide on to a course of action when a hand in her shoulder made her jump, turning around she saw Tamaki's face, he was smiling but the sadness in his eyes proved how worried he was, "we heard, come, we'll take you to the hospital" he said and pulled her on to the parking lot and in to one of the limousines there. She heard Tamaki's voice so far away, she knew he was beside her trying to make her feel better but her mind and heart were with her father, "please let him be okay, please let him be okay" prayed in her mind tightening her hands in to a fist.
"Otouri Grand Hospital" read the sign on the front of the white building, Haruhi run inside followed by Tamaki, she heard her voice asking for his father's room, but it sounded strange to her, her heart stuck in her throat did not let her breath normally, Tamaki tried to calm her down but when the nurse turned to call a doctor she just run towards him and blurted again the same question "where's my father? I need to see him!"
The doctor was not too old yet not really young, his small spectacles gave him a grandfatherly look, his voice was low and calm while he explained the accident and fatal wounds Haruhi's father had received. Haruhi could not process his words, she knew he was trying hard to explain her but somehow most of the words had lost its meaning. "The ribs were broken… pressing him… not able to breathe… internal bleeding"
"Is he going to be okay? I need to see him" repeated Haruhi feeling hot tears falling down her cheeks, had she being crying? She hadn't notice, she heard Tamaki's voice in the background but it was still so far away his words could not make any sense to her,
"Miss Fujioka, we were not able to do anything, I'm sorry we…."
"What, what do you mean… what are you talking about?" mumbled Haruhi clenching her hand over her heart, Tamaki took her hand between his and she turned around, Kyoya had arrived now while Mori, Honey and the twins had arrived there only 3 minutes after them, Kyoya's eyes were wide open, he had forgotten why he needed the cellphone in his hand, she saw her bag in the twins hands with her stuff, why did she need that again? What was happening "what…?" tried to ask again Haruhi turning to see the doctor, her voice breaking
"I'm so sorry Miss Fujioka, he was already dead when the ambulance arrived… we tried… if there's anything we can do to ease your pain. We have a group for counseling that…"
"But he was okay", cut off Haruhi mumbling and the doctor stared at her with sad eyes through spectacles, Tamaki felt his heart crumbling Haruhi's small frame trembled so hard, feeling weak there was nothing he could do "He was fine, he was just a little tired because of his late shift, he was okay"
"Miss Fujioka he…"
"He was fine!" screamed Haruhi "what have you done to him?!" her voice hoarse, the doctor turned to see Kyoya who closed his eyes and glanced down. "What have you done to him!?" asked again Haruhi bending, and then Tamaki turned her to see him, her eyes clouded with tears met Tamaki's violet ones, so much pain was reflected in such beautiful eyes, she saw him and then everything went black, in the background she heard Tamaki calling her but her body felt cold and she let her body be swept away by the numbness.
When she woke up she was still in the hospital, restless, her sleep had being infested by nightmares, looking at the ceiling she noticed she was no longer in the reception but in a room, turning she saw Tamaki's worried eyes. "Tamaki-senpai" she called and she then noticed movement, around her the other host club members stirred and stood up to check on her, they had being waiting for her to wake up with their hearts in their hands, praying nothing happened to their beloved club princess. And then again the bile taste filled Haruhi's mouth and the memories like a lightening passed through her body; she tightened her fist noticing Tamaki was holding her other hand not letting her go.
"…" she tried to speak but her voice died out, she felt her sight clouding rapidly afraid of her own words, she swallowed hard "this is a joke right?" she choked out and she saw the desperate looks on his friends yet she was the most desperate. She turned to Tamaki "Tell me this is joke, tell me he's fine, you said everything was going to be fine, I know you said so"
"Haruhi I…" Tamaki didn't know what to say not able to look Haruhi on the eyes
"Please make everything be fine" pleaded Haruhi crying, all they were in silence, while Tamaki held her hand as if he stopped she would fall in to an eternal abyss, and that's how she felt leaning in to Tamaki's embrace crying loader "Everything is going to be fine, everything is going to be fine" soothed Tamaki letting Haruhi cry in his shoulder trembling against him
From them on Haruhi did not let go of Tamaki's hand letting him pulled her from place to place. At some time Kyoya asked her some questions, his father's accounts, his funeral, everything was going to be taken care of by Kyoya, she nodded slowly, her head hurt so much, her eyes burned from crying and she only wanted to rest but she was afraid of closing her eyes, so afraid of being left alone in the darkness of her nightmares.
Hours passed by and she was taken in to a room, still connected to Tamaki's hand yet separated by a panel she let the twin's twin maids change her school uniform to a long black dress, then she was led to the funeral service, many people came, and she heard herself answer to their questions, listening to their words of consideration and worry, anything that she was not able to respond Tamaki by her side answered as quick as if it had being him the one questioned.
It was in the moment when they opened the coffin when she broke the hold on Tamaki's hand and she embraced his father lifeless frame crying again, she called him and shook him feeling angry and sad at the same time, "Why? Why did you die? You were supposed to protect me! You were supposed to be with me, not to leave me alone! ...Why Mom, why did you take him with you? I needed him so much".
The people left one by one until there were only the host club members left and Tamaki tried to pull Haruhi away from the coffin "No, let me go, Otou-san don't leave me please" pleaded Haruhi trying hard but Tamaki hold her by her waist and pulled harder and at seeing the coffin being taken away she let herself fall, and she would have fall in to the floor if Tamaki had not hold her tight against him, she let him embrace her and carry her in his arms not wanting to see her father's coffin enter the fire. "Home" she said and Tamaki whispered "yes" taking her in to his limousine again.
"Tamaki... he's dead... I'm never going to see him again" cried Haruhi her tears wetting his shirt.
"ssshhh… it's ok... it's ok " he said petting her head to soothe her
"Haruhi you can stay at your house if you want to but our houses are yours" said Honey calmly, even if Haruhi could not hear them, Mori nodded. Haruhi looked back at them for a brief moment and nodded in respond. "You're so great with me... thanks" she mumbled leaving then to her house with Tamaki.
They arrived in no time, she pulled her keys and opened the door, everything was as she left it but all felt different, the house was cold and empty as her heart. She entered leaving the door open, Tamaki followed after her and closed the door not knowing what to do. She placed his father's bag, which had being given to her in the hospital, she walked in to their sanctuary and placed her father's burial stone beside her mother's, walking out she took one of her father's photo with her mother and walking back to the sanctuary she replaced the photo of her mother alone for the one of them together. Slowly she moved around the house arranging things, cleaning up and finally changing her clothes not even caring that Tamaki was there, he jumped blushing madly and turned around not to look at her. Then she took her futon out of her room and placed it on the sanctuary as close as she could from her parent's photo.
The moment her head touched the pillow tears started pouring and they would not stop even in her sleep, lost to the world she just waited for everything to vanish, calling her father and mother, hoping that everything had being a nightmare, afraid of waking up desperate not to sleep, because every dream made the awakening harder.
The only thing that was kept unchanged was Tamaki. On the first day he stayed with her until late in the night and then went back to his home, returning a few hours later with a small luggage and a terribly worried expression, he checked on her and she had not moved from her bed, he tried to move her but she was lost in sadness. "Let her nurse her wounds with her tears, there will be a time to be strong, this is not the time" said Shima-san, his old housekeeper, Tamaki looked back at Haruhi, his violet eyes not leaving the girl's frame. After that he stayed there, cleaning as much as he could with Shima-san's help, he didn't let any other person in to the house "She would hate it if I let strangers in her home and her father would kill me" he said and smiled sadly. Shima-san would help her bath with a wash-clothe and then Tamaki would cook and feed her, like a newborn child she dependent on him completely, not letting anyone else touch her or get near her, even Shima-san had needed Tamaki's help at the beginning.
Every time he would speak to her about what he had tried to do, asking her for permission or forgiveness if that was the case, telling about the classes and people who had come to visit her, about the host club members and how much they wanted to see her. She would only respond to him, slowly opening to him.
One day when Tamaki was about to leave she stopped him pulling him from his shirt, he turned back to see her, her eyes seemed vacant not looking at him, he was about to retrieve his shirt as gently as possible when he heard her voice, hoarse and broken yet clear "Please don't go, stay until I fall sleep" she said lifting her eyes to meet his, her eyes were clouded with tears but her voice sounded stronger than the last few days, Tamaki smiled tenderly and sat down by her side holding her hand between his. Haruhi held his hand back tightly moving to place her head on his lap and he instantly started petting her gently, moving his hand through her brown locks.
It didn't take long for Haruhi to fall asleep but he didn't leave her, every time he tried she held his hand tighter, tears fighting to fall, so he decided to stay there for the night. Looking at her Tamaki felt like crying, he knew the pain would take long to lessen and would never disappear but seeing her like that left him drained of happiness, he felt so weak and powerless, even when he thought he was trying all he could do, he wanted to do more. "Haruhi… how can I take the pain away?" wondered Tamaki seeing the tears falling from her eyes "how..?"
Author's note: So this is the first chapter on Adoption, I have changed much of it but I can't get any more proud, I cried while writing this chapter, I hope you love and hate it like I did.
Dictionary: "Otou-san" is father with a very formal way of speaking; I wanted her to sound very childlike even thought she uses "chichi" which is very informal and even rude because it like saying "old man" instead of "father". A "Burial stone" is some kind of mementos that Japanese people use to pray for their dead on their houses. A "Futon" is the bed "sleeping-bed type Japanese people use.