Time: Thursday, 8 April 2010
Battleon of the Nexus - 2010 April fools chapter - to be updated soon xD Also: An appearance by One Eyed Doll and... let's find out!
There was an annual Fool magic fizzing in the cooling night breeze as the early sun peeped over the horizon. The cockerel crowed twice as a brawny hand reached out and slammed a fist against the cliff-face, sleepily turning over and yawning as Larosin, Dragon Tamer, awakens to a brand new 'morning', complaining about how uneasy the ground felt as her room-mate complained loudly about how the tent felt "Cramped" somehow. "Morning, Rayne." Rosia sleepily said as she stared at her reflection in the pool outside their tent (Yes, Rayne and Rosia both share a tent at the moment...) At feeling around for her mirror, she noticed her fringe was cropped shorter and flowed much more ragged over her shoulders. Then Rayne replied in amazement at the reflection:
"Is it just me or has your voice deepened a few octaves?" said Rayne's gender-swapped voice... Then 'he' appeared, Rayne's lips full-blown and his figure changed to be much more slimmer and curvier in the hermaphrodite's regular Rogue outfit, "watcha think? Rosia? Whoa! WHAT HAPPENED TO US? Is this a joke?" 'Ray' looked at the Dragon-Tamer's rippling abs, and fainted from how muscular she appeared from his view. "AAAAGGGHHHHH! MY FIRKING HAIR!" The only reply was Rosia's loud scream that shook the trees from their roots. "I'M so ANGRY!" The male Rosia grabbed Twilly in rage and growled at the brown furball, "Ask Warlic what he did to us! OR ELSE. And bring lotsa Alvenos shampoo and some Cowchickens ta slaughter for breakfast,"
"Hey, this is so deja vu," The older female Lorian, Ray answered, "But didn't this happen last year?" Rosia burned with distaste at Rayne's false explanation. "HULK SMASH! You don't get me angry over my hair! I must lotion and lather my cropped hair with shaving cream and wax! And I need a shower! A manly shower."
"OH NOES!" Twilly yelled exitting from Rosia's tent, "this is a catastrophe! I AM GONNA get outta here!" The furry Moglin squeaked loudly as Rosia stared at Twilly, about to punt him. He ran as fast as a speeding Night-mare! "Warlic! We hafta situation!" At this announcement 'Seraph' awoke in Darkovia, disorientated, the male Slayer shook her fur like a regular Xunatolv, before his eyes widened- time seemed to freeze. He glanced at his hands, then touched his sparkling hair and noticed glitter everywhere, "Dammit, I turned into a sparkling bishie." Seraph realised, not pleased at the transformation, then he glanced at his PANTS.
"What the hell happened here?" The former female Slayer yelled, "I'm male! AARRGGHH! THIS ALMOST IS LIKE HELL, ArooOOo!" Needless to say, Seraph had a lot at angst over this incident and wasn't the bit miffed by the fact that she now had the muscles and power of a dominant Alpha Lycan. He fell over immediately as a Super Saiyan Drakel called Pi came over over to see the commotion. The small Drakel laughed. "Haha! The Slayer of Darkovia! Turned to the opposite gender! Well, well."
"I'll demand!" Seraph yelled to Pi-squared, "It's not funny!" His fur bristled as the draconian Pi continued fooling and floating around, dodging his every hit. "Whaddya want?" Pi's eye glinted. "To give ya something, in exchange for..." His eyes narrowed, "Pie. I like pie. Do ya like mudkips?" Seraph fell over anime style. "No? Ha."
"I like pie, but I hate mudkips!" seethed an irate Seraph, "I got pie, come and get it~" he added playfully.
"Where da pie? Where's the R? Or a square?" Seraph added mockingly before tossing his backpack containing Baneware at poor Pi. The Drakel squawked in protest.
"Got any more pot roast?" Pi was scared at the large pet Wolf and cringed before tossing her hurriedly a package, "Here's your much needed power up!" Pi added playfully, "It'll make ya super! And turns your hair blonder! You'll become just like me!"
"Why in Lore would I want BLONDER hair?" Seraph wondered, "I already look like a dork with my male getup garb!" His question went unanswered as Pi gave an enigmatic smile, but he looked rather furious. "Up up and that's your Takeaway!" Before you can say 'Fie' the Drakel zoomed off to outer space to have a small chat to the LSS Alteon where a special visitor awaited him. "Special message for..." A shadowy form with silver eyes accepted the offer, before smirking rather secretly...
"Well, it's about time, what's the news, Pi. Make it quick." A blonde captain with a lazy ponytail nuzzled the seductress's hand, "You're mine, Odaxitar." Launce said in lieu of her blushing, "And you can't even protest about it, hmm." Just then a Holommunitar rang and Launce answered it, crooking his arm around the Soul Weaver. "Wace? Uh huh... One Eyed Doll? Chaos? Mayhem? Battle of the Bands? Yahuh... hm," Launce had a secretive smirk on his face, "I just had an idea. A good one, since the dreaded One-Eyed Doll of Chaos is situated in Battleon for the week... mehehheh." He rubbed his hands with glee before kissing his captive on the cheek.
"Then why are we affected?" Deeta demanded of Masoti and Vixen, "And why the flagjog is Vixen of all people unaffected?" Seraph paused for awhile, thinking it over, "It's because she's not a native to Lore." Deeta's feminine face flushed, "I'M also not a native to this continent!" The female Martin insisted, "And I'm still affected!"
"Well, it might be because she's a human. Humans are unaffected, but aliens as well as Lorians are affected, the only people unaffected are those in out of space!"
"What the double tee-eff does that mean?" asked Demeter (Tetris), her dumbness still evident.
"Oh look! It's the She-man of the Puny-verse," teased Vixen as a raging Rosia appeared, "And she's armed! With rifles, and hammers and swords, oh my." She pushed Masoti into a log pile as Rosia entered the compound (OW! commented Masoti as he knocked his head on a Twig, 'FWISHES!' responded Twig as he started stuffing his cwute face of Masoti's hair). "Sorry Misa- I mean Masoti. Hey, who are you?" she yelled playfully at the male Dragon Tamer. Masoti shivered in his log-pile as Rosia looked suspiciously at the quivering heap of logs. Rosia grunted and dismissed the shaking logs, before turning to Vixen.
"I am the greatest Rosetta stone." Rosia announced, before he realised what he said, "I mean," He cleared his throat loudly as Vixen laughed hysterically at his mistake, "I MEAN, I am the great ROSIA! I am strong! I am not the Mighty Moron! I am almost half the hulk- but don't get my hair messed up~!" Rosia had a death glare at Vixen's face, trying to hide her glee at the Dragon Tamer's response at everything. "Did I say anything that offended you." Rosia glared some more, having a glaring contest with Vixen. "Because I AM... A DRAGON TAMER~" he announced operatically, "And I'm here to promote my hair lotion!" Rosia flaunted his dazzling shiny hair full of glossiness and swung it in reeeeeallllyyyyy slooooow motion to the opening tune of 'Carlifornia, Here we come'... "Oh, have you seen Warlic? Ya know, the one with the biiig staff." Vixen tried desperately not to laugh at Rosia's extravagant face, but it was too hard to resist.
"BWAHahaha..." Vixen spluttered, before realising Rosia glaring at her, "... it's not a joke?" she said sheepishly, "please don't do anything you'll regret," Rosia sheathed his Jeffery Can Opener and shoved in the poor Vixen's face, "MAAASOOTTTIII!" she screamed as Rosia started chasing her around with death threats raining down. "WHY-youlittlefirking-snobbishoeyken-whodarestolaugh-inmyface!" Rosia ran around, trying to slash at his opponent and frothing at the mouth. "RAAAAWWWRRRRRRRRR!" The Dragon Tamer looked rather feral, "HULK HAMMER NAOWWW!" Just then Masoti couldn't bear it any longer and exploded from the log-pile, before tackling the rabid Dragon Tamer. SMAAAASSHHH! SHATTER! "BWAHAHAHAHA!" Seraph said as the Slayer saw the scene before him, laughing at their antics.
"LEAVE MY FRIEND OUT OF THIS!" Masoti yelled, punching Rosia in the face, "I shall duel you!" Rosia deflected the blow and came to his senses briefly.
"Feh, call that a measly small punch? THIS IS A PUNCH!" Rosia summoned up his rippling abs full of extra hard muscles as his eyes glowed yellow, "Ultra mega falcon spinning poke!" With this, Rosia launched three precise blows at Masoti and the Force exploded, sending him through three walls of concrete. CRASSHH! CLATTER! wrrrl
"Ow my arm!" Masoti screamed, clutching his arm as Tetris came to the commotion. Coincidentally, Tetris was a... "A frog?" Masoti facepalmed.
"Ribbit!" offered Tetris slimily, "I cannot help you, I need my skin to be nourished with water. Worm?" Seraph just screamed at Tetris's temporary appearance.
"AROOOOOOO! Ah!" Seraph over reacted, activating his Chi as he saw Tetris's form, he forgot he was wearing his Saiyan suit while floating 400 feet. "FROOOGGG!" Just then a huge mega-loud explosion occurred in the vicinity, accidentally activated by the panicky bishounen Slayer. Rosia looked up to see a huge glowing white comet heading for him. "Saiyan comet overloaaaaaadddddd! AAAAHHHHHHHHHH! FRROOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGGG!" Seraph managed to scream. He missed.
"Oh cr-" Rosia said before it hit him with full power. KAAAPOWWWW! "-Raaaaapppp!" he managed to finish, face-down with eyes spinning in swirly circles. Masoti got up from the rubble, covered in dust as the fallen walls protected him from the brunt of the comet-powered force. Masoti cautiously inched away from the unconscious Rosia, picking up a shaken Vixen, "Let's find Deeta and Seraph and get this sorted out." They both ran for the direction of the woods.
"Come to me, music lovers!" crooned a wonderful deep masculine voice of the Darkovian Forest, "Come to me, lovers of soft gentle awesome music!" proclaimed the voice of... The Phantom X! Classical music erupted from the woods, the Lycans and Vampires crowding around the organ which continued to play the... you get the point? The Phantom X had a black cloak and streaming blonde hair, hidden under a poorly disguised face-makeup.
"yesss!" groaned the rest of the Battleon crowd, eager to hear more of the lovely music, "we want to hear more... more rock music!" The Phantom X face-faulted, before readjusting his tiny mask. ('Clearly, this isn't working' Launce in disguise as the Phantom, stated to a hypnotized Odaxitar behind the organ.) Dah dah duhh duh!
"We want to hear more Chaos!" proclaimed Tek as Valencia groped the Phantom's gown, "We want you to strip for us! For we shall do so if you-" They proceeded to do so, under the Phantom's command. The Lycans snarled their approval as the music continued, "For those who'd seen my face, strip under my command!"
"Not another song sequence~" groaned Twilly at this. "This awesome trance over you, you cannot desist." The Phantom X continued, "In your dreams, I'm game for you, you already slept," He continued leering at Odaxitar, "And your desire always burnt for me, though you've turned. What is this mask you wore? For others to see." He urged his captive, "The Phantom X is always there, for love is blind."
"Those who had seen my true face, drew back if seared." Odaxitar began in her entranced state, "For the mask I always wore, is now discarded." Everyone face-faulted, clearly she wasn't good at rhyming. But no one bothered to look behind the organ, so they wondered who else was speaking. "Your awesome power over us grew stronger yet... Although I tend to forfeit." Everyone else began dancing the Polka and started stripping some more.
"It's me they heard!" The Phantom X chuckled, "Your futile soul and my awesome mega-powerful voice, had now combined, for the Phantom X is controlling everyone's miiiiiiinnnndds..." Launce chuckled secretly, at his ploy.