Who Gets the Last Laugh?
Fiction Rated: T for mild cursing Sam W. and Dean W Humor
Summery: Teen Sam and Dean start pranking each other while waiting for their dad to return from a hunt. Sam 11 and Dean 15
Disclaimer: Supernatural is owned by Eric Kripke and the CW. I'm only borrowing them I'll give them back more or less in the same shape.
A/N: This is my first attempt at writing so please be kind. My thanks to Karen for proofreading for mistakes even though it is unbetaed so any mistakes are unintentional and all mine. Thanks also to Blue Peanut M&M for the nudge to actually submit this. I hope you enjoy.
Driving the Impala toward their next job John looked at his boys in the rearview mirror. Normally both boys would be picking at each other, as they couldn't sit together quietly unless they were asleep or sick. Both boys looked back at him with innocent expressions as though they were little again. Remembering that just that morning he had been woken by Sam screaming at Dean for putting shaving cream on his hand, which he had managed to wipe across his face. Sam had retaliated by switching and then hiding one of Dean's Metallica tapes for a Johnny Cash, one of Johns, the resulting yelling and attempts at fratricide had both boys regulated to the back seat. Threatening both boys with "any more pranks and I see lots of shiny sharp weapon and lots of cross country running in your futures" Sam and Dean started to look innocent then.
Dean and Sam looked at John in the rearview mirror until he looked at the road again. Both Sam and Dean mutually, deciding with one look at each other that pushing John's temper right now would be a mistake. Each young Winchester thinking of the payback against the other they would commit when John left them alone.
As the Impala ate up the miles to the new hunt Sam broke the silence and asked "what are we dealing with" before Dean could stop him. Since no whining was in his voice John actually answered without an argument starting. "You and Dean will be staying at a Hunter's cabin while I go meet up with Joshua and Bobby in hunting down what sounds like a wood spirit." Both boys spoke up against being left behind, Dean more so, "let Joshua or Bobby watch Sammy and take me" Sam piping up that he doesn't need a sitter and he could help. John's patience finally ran out and he roared at them to be quiet and it was his decision and not up for a vote. Four hours later the Impala turned down a rough road and halfway down the trees thinned out enough to see a cabin. Pulling next to the cabin the three Winchesters looked around the cabin, having electricity and a working bathroom cheered the boys up considerably. The apparent lack of a shower was solved when Sam who was exploring the grounds called out" the showers are back here" and they appeared to have a generator and pump to be connected for use. Dean called over to Sam "this is good at least now I don't have to smell the shower after you've used it." Sam retorted" at least I don't have to listen to you while you sing while you're out here."
John came out and looked at the pump and heater and tersely told the boys how it worked. Turning to Sam and Dean as if he could read their minds he warned" when I get back this cabin had better still be in one piece when I get back and no monkey business had better have occurred, I should be back within three days, call Pastor Jim if you don't hear from me by then." Both Sam and Dean keeping straight faces replied "yes Sir" as they watched their dad turn the Impala around and leave. As the Impala cleared from view both boys went inside the cabin to straighten up their things and to start salting the windows and doorways of both the cabin and shower building.
Dean put the food away while Sam made the beds. As Dean was examining the wood burner next to the stove he noticed that the chimney pipes needed cleaned as a puff of cinder came from the open flue door. Thinking what would happen if he could get Sam to open the flue door as it had started to blow outside made Dean grin. Sam while making up the single metal framed bunks he saw that the screws on one of them were loose. Making this bunk up for Dean he imagined the look on Dean's face as the bunk fell apart, loosening up the screws a little more.
As the Winchester boys got ready for bed, Sam having to wash his face and hair and put on a clean shirt first, Dean having told his brother to make sure the burner was venting through the chimney so while heating the cabin they wouldn't be suffocated by the smoke. Sam yelped as the soot came out and got him right on the face, as soon as he could breathe he promised retribution to his big brother when he went to bed and fell asleep. Still mad after dinner Sam told a smirking Dean "Good night" as he laughed to himself thinking what would happen when Dean got into bed. Finally turning off the light Dean climbed into his bunk and pulled the sheets up, Sam holding his breathe waiting for the crash. At first nothing happened then as soon as Dean shifted to get comfortable the bunk collapsed sending the mattress and Dean to the floor. Laughing Sam innocently asked Dean if maybe he shouldn't have had that last cookie. Dean retaliating with a threat of "just you wait until morning little brother then we'll see who's laughing."
Waking up before Sam Dean walked outside to the shower building to get cleaned up. Walking back he saw a patch of poison oak and thought of a payback for the bunk collapse.
Waking up the first thing Sam noticed was that Dean was already up, and knowing that normally Dean was a notoriously late riser, he decided to act as though nothing had happened the night before. Smelling that Dean had actually cooked breakfast made Sam a bit apprehensive especially when he called "Morning Sam, hope you slept well." "There's some training that Dad wanted us to get done this morning right after breakfast." "Why" asked Sam already on guard and staying out of Dean's reach. "Look if we do it now we can tell Dad we did it and still have time to have some fun today" threw back Dean.
After running through a path and then cross country through the woods for a couple of hours both boys returned sweating and laughing as they returned to the cabin. They had such fun running through the woods even with a minor problem that came up- "I thought we were going to get it when that family of skunks crossed our path" declared Sam. "Yeah you did real well not moving a muscle until they moved on and handling the rest of the trail" praised Dean forgetting he was mad at his brother for a moment and proud of him for not moving. He also temporarily forgot what he had done to the towels earlier. "Why don't you head into the showers and I'll be there in a couple of minutes, then we can find something to do" called Dean.
Sam grabbed a change of clothes, his toiletry kit, and a clean towel and washcloth from the stack by his bed. Dean followed five minutes later actually forgetting what he had done to Sam's towel. He had still been really annoyed at Sam when he woke up and seeing the patch of poison oak he had dragged Sam's towel over it then folded the towel back up. As both boys washed the sweat and grit off they dressed quickly and went back into the cabin to find things to do- after a while of horsing around Sam grabbed a book after a while and went outside to read under a tree- Dean decided to listen to music on his walkman as he bolted his bed back together. Later Sam came running in the cabin yelling at Dean that he had ran them through something because he was covered in a rash on most of his body. Dean looked up and suddenly remembered what he had done, "Oh man I forgot I did it Sam, I swear it, I just sort of pulled your towel through some poison oak, but come on you collapsed my bed." Sam sputtering a "WHAT" lunged at Dean who decided retreating was the best strategy now. Running through the wood Dean failed to notice that he ran right through the same patch of poison oak he used earlier. Sam however mad as he was watched Dean run through the stuff suddenly stopped and started to laugh and point at Dean's feet. Dean stopped and turned to look at Sam then to see him pointing at his feet Dean looked and swore "Damn It" as he realized what he had done. Scowling at Sam he snarled "Laugh it up Sammy you're helping me clean up and do laundry when we get back!" " Want to bet "shot Sam right back refusing to back down from Dean.
"Do you want to be the one to tell Dad about all this, or would you rather we minimized what Dad finds out about?" In one silent look between them it was decided that letting John find out as little as possible was preferable. "Where can we wash our stuff at?" asked Sam not sure if the cabin had a washer. "I saw a washer in the corner next to the showers, look we'll soak the clothes and towels in soap while we shower and try to get as much off us as we can." Wanting to do nothing more then wash as much poison oak off and then pour calamine on his body Sam readily agreed. But after some vigorous scratching he couldn't help but whine" But I'm already itching I don't think any more is going to come off".
Dean ignored this and went into the shower building to check the washer out, noticed that all it needed was to be hooked to the nearby water tap and plugged into the wall. Sam went into a closet in the cabin and returned with a metal tub and said he was going back to look for laundry soap. Not finding any in the cabin he remembered seeing a small door on the outside of the shower building thought he would look there. Opening the door Sam not only found an old bottle of detergent but also some rope and cloth pins. As he reached for the rope the pile of rags next to them moved, Sam yelled "Dean" as he grabbed the soap and ran out the door. Hearing his little brother yell Dean came running "Dean there's something in the closet" Sam yelled as Dean came into view. "Dean the pile of rags moved on it own" Sam swore pointing to the open door. "Right Sammy if you want to get everything cleaned up before Dad gets back quit fooling around its daytime and this place is protected as you know". "Dean I'm telling you something moved just come look" "Alright Samantha I'll look but you're the one that be doing the most cleaning if there's nothing there understand?" Grabbing a long stout stick Dean advanced on the closet, both boys missing the small whole in the ground next to the closet covered as it was by leaves and branches, determined to show Sam that there was nothing there.
With Sam behind him looking leery Dean approached the pile of rags, which just lay there, taking the stick he poked the pile sending rags everywhere but nothing moved. Unseen by both boys in a corner what they thought was a small fuzzy rug stretched itself out so that the white stripe on the middle of its black body the only thing visible besides the glittering eyes. The movement of the rags being tossed around and landing on it had woken the creature up from a deep nap and it was annoyed! "Look nothing there Sam", laughed Dean as he saw nothing and couldn't resist baiting his brother a little, "you can start cleaning by getting the clothes line set up." Reaching into the closet Dean reached for the dropped rope when he caught movement in the corner of his eye as he started to shut the door. Standing behind his brother Sam saw it too fully intending to rub it in that he was right, when the creature came into the light and both boys froze. As the skunk stretched and brought its tail up in their direction both boys slowly backed away from the closet hoping the skunk was only bluffing. Unfortunately being woke up by noise and flying rags did not make the skunk happy as it stomped a forefoot and decided not to accommodate the boy's wishes. After backing slowly away from the open door the skunk got closer to the doorway. Dean pushed Sam backward slowly picking up a nearby pine cone telling Sam that he was going to distract the skunk hopefully and that Sam was to run as soon as its attention was elsewhere the two boys. The skunk stopped and looked at the boys with what Dean would swear was a snug smirk. For a long pause neither boy breathed as the skunk turned around and with a final glance over its shoulder walked off into the woods. Sam and Dean sighed with relief and shut the door. "What is it today about skunks" griped Dean" That's the second time today we almost ended up smelling like Ode de Pepe Le Pew.
For a half hour Dean and Sam showered hoping to get some more poison oak off themselves. Dean watched Sam scratch and remembered the calamine lotion. "Sam come on back into the cabin so we can plaster calamine lotion on." Looking through the cabinet in the bathroom Dean located several bottles of the pinkish tan lotion as well as a big ball of cotton balls.
Gesturing for Sam to sit on a kitchen chair facing him Dean turned and started to apply the lotion on Sam's rash reddened back. After his back was covered Sam reached over and grabbed Dean's wrist and declared that he could get the rest himself. Dean looked at him then with a "fine just be sure you rub it in or I'll reapply it my way" surrendered on of the bottles and a handful of cotton balls. As Sam starts to cover himself in calamine Dean starts to cover his legs, then started to think how he can keep Sam from itching and making it worse before their Dad got back. "Sam when that stuff dries put on a loose shirt and some shorts then come help me put the bunk back together it should go pretty quick" ordered Dean. "Thinking that by keeping their hands busy neither boy would have time to scratch.
Using a bag of tools that Dean had found in a closet the bunk frame went back together with little difficulty. Happy that they had gotten the bunk back together Dean noticed it was only a little after 1:00 PM and Sam was looking like he wanted to start scratching himself decided he'd better think fast. "Hey Sam how about you look through the pile of books that Bobby and Joshua left and grab a couple to start translating them for Dad." Sam thought for a minute and couldn't remember John forbidding the books decided that they could possibly be something interesting to do. And as an added bonus maybe he could concentrate hard enough on the old texts that he could forget how itchy he was and not scratch.
Agreeing to do the books Sam reached into the pile and randomly grabbed three then grabbed a spiral notebook and pen and settled on the couch that was to the side of a window. "Dean what are we going to tell Dad, I mean how are we going to hide the poison oak from him he's going to notice us wearing jeans and long sleeves all the time." " We have hopefully at least a day if not more before they get back. We'll try to dry as much of it as we can so don't scratch" reasoned Dean. "That's easy for you to say you only have it on your legs, besides what if they get back early" persisted Sam. "Look just concentrate on the books for awhile and then later I'll fix dinner and we can clean up everything before it gets dark" counseled Dean.
Sam spent the afternoon getting a good head start in all three book translations. Dean sat with Sam for a while going through a couple of car magazines. Then got bored and went outside to practice knife throwing, having noticed a target set up on a nearby stump. After a while dean entered the cabin to the sight of Sam scratching with one hand and writing notes with the other. "Sam quit it with the scratching already you're going to make it worse" called Dean. Sam started to say something but Dean held a hand up" before you say anything listen we'll find some oatmeal and make a plaster to put it you, then we'll let it sit on you for a while and see if that helps. After the two of then had Sam pretty much covered Sam asked "are we good for now?" "Yeah for now lets call it a draw before anything worse happens, we can always pick it up later." "Especially with Dad and the others due back" agreed Sam. "Speaking of which after we eat we'd better get the bunks set up incase Dad, Joshua and Bobby get back early."
After a half hour Dean sent Sam to wash up while he started dinner. By the time Sam came back Dean had the water almost heated for macaroni and cheese and the sloppy joes meat starting to cook. Glancing over at Sam as he applied more calamine lotion Dean felt a twinge of guilt, enough that he wouldn't harass Sam too much for the next couple of days, but not enough that Sam wasn't fair game in the near future. Sam already a little self conscious knew he'd have to ask Dean for help called out "Dean help me for a minute will you?" Dean smoothly stirred seasoning into the meat and drained the macaroni and told Sam just a few minutes. Adding the other ingredients to the macaroni and stirring then putting the pan on the back of the stove Dean turned and walked over to Sam. After helping Sam with his back Dean returned to the stove and Sam reached into a nearby cupboard and pulled out plates, cups, and silverware setting them on the counter and table. Reaching into the fridge Sam pulled out not only a bottle of milk but a jar of dill pickles he had noticed and knew that Dean liked them too.
Within ten minutes both boys are eating and any thoughts either of them had about itching temporarily disappeared. Dean looked around the cabin then at Sam " I think once we get the bunks made we'll be good for when Dad gets back here if we play our cards right he won't have a clue." "But Dean what if he- Sam chill out and keep yourself covered for another day or two" interrupted Dean. "And don't scratch so noticeably" said Dean as he struggled not to scratch himself. Let's hit the shower for one more rinse off before bed and then apply new lotion.
Later both boys bathed, medication applied prepared to get ready and relax a bit before bed. Sam once again reading but instead of the old texts he was reading "A Wrinkle in Time" by Madeline Lenagle. Dean was reading too but he was reading his secret stash of magazines. Right as the brothers were getting ready to turn in, refreshing the salt lines and putting a final dose of calamine lotion on, they heard two cars and saw the headlights heading toward the cabin. Reacting quickly Dean threw Sam a pistol and then picked the shotgun that John had left for them to use. Knowing it was too late to turn the lights off Dean gestured for Sam to get in the shadows of a corner and stay there. Dean stood in the shadows across and to the side of the door and waited. There was one heavy knock on the door, a pause and then three more in a row. The knob slowly turned and the door slowly opened to admit John, Bobby, and Joshua into the cabin. John turned to where he could sense Dean standing and saw the barrel of the shotgun held ready. "Dean good work but we'd all prefer you to point that ole scattergun somewhere else" drawled Bobby as he had turned with John while Joshua was still turned the other way where Sam has hidden. John looked at Dean then with a pleased expression" stand down boys" then watched as Dean gestured for Sam to come out and reached to take the pistol back as Sam walked up.
As all the men walked into the light John got a good look at both his sons and sighed. Bobby and Joshua also getting a good look at Sam and Dean started laughing uncontrollably. Dean and Sam looked at them like they had lost their minds, "what the hell's the matter with you two" demanded Dean" did the spirit drop the two of you on your heads are something? Bobby in between laughs called out "nice make up job but I don't think pink suites either of you." Sam and Dean then looked at each other fully and softly groaned. Sam's shirt was still off showing his covered torso and arms, and Dean had yet to rub the stuff into his legs well so it was still thick and very visible.
Keeping their faces as neutral as possible Sam and Dean looked up at their Dad, who looked like he was torn between being laughing and being exasperated at them. As one the boys chimed "we weren't expecting you guys back so early but everything's ready for you." John looked at his sons thinking that they looked too innocent but having no real proof since everything else looked in one piece decided to let it go for now. After all John thought they could have gone through a patch of it in the woods and Sam could have tripped and fell in it. Even though in the better light Sam's poison oak looked like it was little patches instead of one big rash or just on his legs like Dean had. "Dean go finish rubbing that stuff in then go get the food out to reheat. And Sam go put a shirt on and don't scratch or else I'll tape a couple of socks to your hands."
John watched his retreating sons for a minute then took his duffle bag to the made up bunks and selected one. As he sat down for a minute he thought more on the condition of his sons. Deciding that more likely then not Sam and Dean had pranked each other John had to laugh to himself at the thought of his boys struggling not to scratch for the next few days. And the fact that everything had been laid out like it was supposed to and the neutral looks John had received he decided he would definitely not call them on this stunt. After all the poison oak would be punishment enough for now. Bobby and Joshua came up dragging a bag to a chosen bunk then all three men went to wash their hands and faces up for dinner.
Struggling not to itch Sam come up to Dean in the kitchen and in a low voice said "I think Dad knows we did something, he looked at us with his I know what you did look." "What are you talking about?" scoffed Dean "Look he may suspect something but he can't prove anything, I already told you keep quiet we have everything cleaned up and the cabin waiting for them, and we are good." Walking back into the main part of the cabin Dean informed the three men the dinner was reheating. Bobby also having put two and two together tried to get Sam to spill how he had gotten covered so badly with poison oak. He started by teasing Sam calling him a klutz and scratched at his own chest until Dean stepped in front of Sam and glared at Bobby.
Fifteen minutes later the three men were eating, and Sam and Dean were heading toward their beds more then ready to go to sleep. They paused as John called out to them that they would be staying for a day or two to resupply and relax a little. Not bothering to tell them the real reason was that he didn't want to be trapped in a car with them until their rashes dried up a bit. After eating the three men got out the tequila and settled in the main area on a couple of armchairs and a moth eaten couch. Bobby spoke first" You know John next time you leave go on a hunt you might want to find a sitter for those two" laughing as he ducked the pillow John had chucked at him. "Good idea since your volunteering they can stay at your place next time and you can watch them" shot back John. "Yeah Bobby you'd look real cute doing the Mary Poppins routine" threw in Joshua as he ducked behind the chair to avoid the knife Bobby had thrown at him.
"Both of you knock it off," ordered John" your worse then the boys." "Besides the two of them know about keeping a secret and protecting each other, we'll never get what happened out of them." "True plus those two won't dare do anything in front of you John but I'll bet something big went down" suggested Bobby. "We can try to guess for the rest of the week what happened while you were gone, but I for one just want to get some sleep and not stay awake wondering about what could have happened" put in Joshua, who was slowly coming from behind the chair he'd taken refuge behind. Turning all the lights off the three hunters went toward the bed and soon all that was heard everyone settling in for a good night's sleep.
Feigning sleep Dean and Sam listened to the adults and grinned at each other. Each brother thinking the same thing as they fell asleep, "You just wait until next time" oh yes there would defiantly be a next time.
A/N: I'll do my best to respond to reviews. Constructive criticism, tips welcomed. Also is there anyone who has time to take on a beta job?