24A/N: Hey guys, I'm a really bad updater its not a secret anymore. I update when I have time but I never have any. It takes me a half hour to write a 1000 word chapter something like two hours to write a 3000 word one. For this story I'm going to stick to around a 1000 words a chatper. Thanks for reading. Don't forget to review it motivates me.
Rin looked out of the window of the school, she could feel a wave a nausea shoot through her and she ran to the bathroom with her mouth covered by her hand she emptied her lunch into the porcelain toilet sounding miserable as she did so. She sat down on the bathroom floor and put her head between her knees breathing calmly. 'I didn't think this would happen so soon...we've only been trying for a month or two.' she thought standing up and rinsing her mouth out before returning to her class. Rin watched as a small brunette child walked up to her desk.
"My mommy throws up a lot in the morning, she says its my little brother telling her that he didn't like what she ate." he smiled at her Rin looked at him and patted his head gently as if he were a cat. Rin closed her eyes with a smile placing a hand on her abdomen.
Rin sat in her and Kagome's apartment at the kitchen table it was raining heavily outside and she held her stomach where her baby still should have been growing healthy and strong. Rin recalled the car hitting her the pressure she felt on her stomach, her vision blurring into a swirl of darkness, the sound of a flat line and nothing but darkness, emptiness, and silence. Her tears fell freely as she thought of the son she had never known the only piece of the man she'd loved. Rin walked over to the medicine cabinet and grabbed a bottle of pain killers she started to put them in her mouth one by one until the bottle was nearly empty. Kagome walked in the door and ripped the pills from her.
"Rin, you can't do this you need to move on. It wasn't your fault. It was an accident." Kagome said tears falling from her eyes.
"I want to die, I want to be with my son." Rin said her voice showered in depression.
"Well I am selfish and I want you to be with me. I want you to stay here with me. There are people who love you here." Kagome said throwing the pills to the trash.
"You don't understand what it is to lose a child." Rin said to Kagome who looked at her angrily.
"I may not understand, but I've seen you mope around here for too long and its time for you to move on." Kagome said wrapping her arms around her cousin.
"I can't do this, I can't live knowing that my son...died for my stupidity." Rin cried.
Rin shook her head and looked at clock that hung on the wall with a small frown class would be over in a few minutes and she would be off to the pharmacy picking up the pregnancy test she had been meaning to since her last missed period. This would be the second coming up in two weeks. Her cell phone was ringing she could hear it vibrating in her bag and she shut it off and walked to the door getting ready to allow the children to leave. Two hours later Rin was sitting behind her desk holding her abdomen with a light smile and she walked out the door and to her car. As Rin drove she saw a man with silver hair walking through the rear view mirror but as she turned her head to look again he was gone. Rin parked in the front of the store she had been lucky enough to get, she could see the aisle that she was going to it had been almost twelve years since she had even thought of those kinds of tests. She grabbed three different ones off of the hooks.
"Are you trying?" the cashier asked Rin as she placed the items in the bag.
"Yes, we are." she would have said boyfriend, but they were to serious to be called that and yet not serious enough to be called a fiance yet. Later that day when Rin got home she sat down on the bed that she and Kohaku sometimes made use of when he stayed at her apartment. Rin threw herself back trying to imagine what her and Sesshoumaru's child would look like. Her hair and his eyes and perfect boyish face and a talent in music.
Sesshoumaru sat in his car trying to work the courage up again to call her, but after the last time he didn't know if he could. 'She's moved on with some man. I moved on with Kagura or so I thought. Why does it always go back to her?' he thought as her punched in her number. There was no answer it instead went to voice mail. Sesshoumaru hung his head on the steering wheel with a groan and dropped his phone into the cup holder. He opened the door to the car and stood outside of they place that would be his apartment for the next three months. His savings should last him a year before he had to worry about working again. He looked down at the pavement as he walked inside. The walls were stable and could use a new coat of paint but he put that aside for now as he brought in his air mattress and guitar. He opened up the guitar case and looked at his most treasured possession the picture of them.
A few hours later he started walking to the nearest pharmacy he tied his silver hair back in a ponytail and he saw her driving there in her car, she was still just as beautiful as the last time he saw her. He stopped mid walk and noticed her look from the side of her eye. Sesshoumaru didn't know what to do and hid behind a car. He wanted to see her under different circumstances. He watched her walk into the pharmacy and decided that he would go inside as well. He watched as she walked into the aisle that had pregnancy tests 'Turn around, look at me...' he willed her in his mind she was infront of him in the line.
"Are you trying?" the cashier asked Rin with a smile.
"Yes, we are." he heard her say and how he missed hearing her voice the voice that always hid a secret melody, he bought the soaps and deodorants that he held in his hand. The cashier looked at him confused.
"Man you sure were looking at Ms. Higurashi weird." she told him.
"What are you talking about?" he asked her he hadn't noticed.
"You were all like in love like with your eyes. I hope you know she has a fiance and they are gonna have a baby." she told him.
"I know both of these things. She is an old friend from almost twelve years ago." Sesshoumaru told the girl.
"You aren't him are you?" the girl asked Sesshoumaru walked away from the talking teenager and to his apartment that was only three blocks away.
Kaleb looked at Spider who smiled at him.
"You are such a money maker kid." he said with a smile on his face his crimson eyes had begun to change over the passed few months. They became more driven, more violent. Of course none of this was point towards Kaleb, mostly Shippo got the beatings. Even though he was once the biggest money maker here, in this old dump of a theater. Kaleb had begun to hate it and he was starting to resent Spider with a passion and he was beginning to think of a way to get out of this. A chance to run away wouldn't come easily the way Spider was always doting on him.