5Title: Stupid
Type of work: Canon
Genre: Humour
Rating of work: K
Content warnings: Really minor spoilers for 311, you could blink and miss it
Pairing: Zutara, slightly implied Kataang, slightly implied Toko
Copyright info/disclaimers: None of the characters or situations in this work of fiction are mine, nor have I obtained permission from the respective copyright holders to use their intellectual property. It's just a bit of fiction I thought I'd write to have fun, so please treat it as such.
Teaser: "Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why did I ever think asking out Katara would work?"
"Hello, Zuko here... of course, you know me. What are you doing? Cooking? Oh, smells good. Ah, I shouldn't get sidetracked. I... uh... have a question. No, it doesn't involve Aang's training... or that threat you gave me... although, I do need to talk to you about that. But it can wait. Uh, so the thing is, well... I'm a pretty cool guy... at least, cool for a Firebender. Ha, that was a pretty good joke, don't you think? Well, ah... what I meant to say is... I'm a cool guy, and you're a cool girl... cute, too... and I think, even though we're opposite elements, we would make a good... well... um... well... what I mean to say is, we would make a nice couple. Would you... maybe... want to go for a walk with me? Not even right now, maybe later?
"Well, what's your answer? Oh... well, yeah, I guess what I did was pretty wrong..."
Suddenly, the frog Zuko had been talking to gave a loud croak and hopped away. Zuko sighed and sat down on a log.
"Yeah, that's what I would say too. I have no romantic ability, do I? How am I supposed to ask her out if I can't even ask a frog? What would Uncle do?
"Zuko, you have to look within yourself, to find your true romantic self, only then will your romantic self reveal itself...
"What was I thinking? Uncle isn't that great at romantic advice! What would Azula do?
"Go out with me or else I'll kill the others!
"Ah, she's not that romantic either... wait, what about Sokka?
"Please, oh pretty pretty please go out with me?
"Nah, sorry Sokka. That just isn't my style... What about Aang?
"Uh... you're a cute girl, and I'm a cute boy...
"Nope... I guess I'm horrible at impersonations... wait, I knew that. I guess... I'll just try again. Do you want to go out with me?"
"Sure. Not a problem. Frankly, I'm surprised, I thought you liked Katara,"
Zuko was interupted by Toph making her way through the bushes to where Zuko was speaking. Zuko jumped, and started to respond before Toph cut in again.
"Listen, Zuko? We're about to set off, so if you want to ask Katara out, now would be the best time before Aang has time to say something..." she said in a taunting tone, turning and leaving. Zuko started to sweat, before following the blind Earthbender.
Three Hours Later
"Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why did I ever think asking out Katara would work! WHY AM I SO BAD AT BEING ROMANTIC! I'm so stupid! Why on earth did I bring up Mai and her good kisses? I can't believe this! Katara will NEVER forgive me! Why am I so horrible!? I might as well just leave the group and let Aang figure out Firebending by himself!"
The same frog croaked again and hopped this time onto Zuko's head. Soon afterwards, Toph found him again.
"We're staying an extra night. Katara's pretty pissed... what did you SAY to her? Oh, and by the way, don't answer that. I know. I heard the whole thing. Consider this payback for burning my feet!"
"Wait! You arranged this entire thing?"
"Are you joking, Zuko? All I did was intimidate you, make you nervous. Yup, you messed this up yourself!"
"... Toph..."
"Catch ya later, Zuko! I'm going to check on Katara and make sure Aang doesn't make any moves on her for you!"
"Thanks, Toph..."