Flea Attacks and Woofs

Disclaimer: I don't own Wicked, I never will own Wicked, I'm hopelessly despairing that I don't own Wicked. But this is what I got.

A/N: Hello, this is my first fanfiction, and I'm nervous enough as it is. I'd really appreciate it, if you liked, or disliked my story, could you please review? Pretty please with those icky sprinkles on top that everyone seems to like?

The storm outside was nothing compared to the clash between to the two roomies. The gray clouds outside nothing to the glares shooting into one another; the pelting rain nothing to the horrible tapping that Elphaba's boots made as she tapped out Galinda's death sentence. Elphaba's hairy companion just stared at both of them, trying to send them mental pictures of steak, and then mental pictures of him; hoping their small, dull brains would understand.

Galinda wrinkled her button nose at the mixed scents of sewers, trash, and pee that engulfed her delicate sense of smell. Her newly manicured nails twisted a lock of flaxen hair, showing how uncomfortable she was. Elphaba just glared at her, tapping her foot and silently daring the blond to refuse. Ignoring the daggers Elphie shot from her eyes, Galinda was finally ready to sell her case.

"Elphie, that thing stinks worse than garbage pick-up day at Shiz." Galinda started out, easing her roomie into the perils of owning a dog.

Said dog, as if knowing he was being mentioned, raised his fluffy black head and gave a low, 'Waf.' Galinda fixed her blue eyes on the canine and twisted her mouth into something resembling a sneer. The little black dog, long silky hair dripping from the wet, stared back from puppy-ish black eyes; his nose trembled as he gave another, 'Waf.'

"And he—it IS a he, right?"


"Okay, good, didn't want to insult any part of the social circle gathered here today," she gave a venomous glance at the dog, "as I was saying, he doesn't even 'Woof' right!" She pleadingly pointed out to her roomie and was rewarded with a spiteful scoff.

Elphie thrust her face forward until her chin easily could have sliced Galinda's eyelashes.

"You think, we can't keep him because he doesn't woof following your precise guidelines!" Elphie whispered in a strained voice, gripping the dog's makeshift leash—which Galinda just noticed was made of a strip of Elphie's own skirt— until her green knuckles turned a sort of mint color, the closest she'd ever get to white.

"Now Elphie, I don't say this without good reason!" The desperate blond girl insisted.

"Really? You could have fooled me." Elphie growled, moving about her dorm room, searching for a towel to dry the dog, and trying to NOT to let him drip on her.

"Elphie. Dogs. They go to the bathroom on the floor."

"I can handle that!" She cried, finally achieving greatness by finding Galinda's fluffy pink towel to rub the dog down with.

"They tear up things." Galinda continued, almost crying out in horror when Elphie touched her towel with a dog.

"I have nothing of value that he can tear up." Elphie motioned towards her ratty raincoat she had just taken off moments before. Or, thrown off, to be precise.

"Well I do!" Galinda screeched tearing her towel away from the green tyrant.

"Who cares?" Elphie asked in a careless tone as if the energy of fighting was suddenly beneath her.

"ME! Plus, they lick their privates!" Galinda added, eyes widening in fear at the mention of it.

"So?" Elphie asked, beginning to tire of Galinda's ever-lasting list.

"SO?! It's unsanitary! It's repulsive! It's unethical!"

"Whatever. Now, are you quite done? Because I have a class in twenty minutes and I get to solve the first equation on the board if I'm first in the classroom."

"Elphie!" Galinda bounced to her feet, not even fighting could retain her hyperactive state-of-being. "Some silly equation is more important to you than listening to reason from your smartical room mate?!"

"No, how could anything compare to my 'smartical' room mate." Elphie drawled sarcastically.

"Exactly!" Galinda agreed, relieved. "Now, back to that, dog."

"Yes, that evil, evil little dog, the dog who will kill us in our sleep!" Elphie mimicked Galinda's high-pitched voice.

"Elphie, were you not listening to Fiyero? Dance through life! DO NOT STRESS IT! Taking in a stray would be so much work!" Galinda emphasized her point by collapsing onto her pink cloud of a bed.

The dog, obviously agreeing with Galinda, walked in a couple circles before easing himself from his weary paws to his side with a tired snort.

Elphaba almost felt a surge of ecstasy flow through her limbs as she saw the cuddly little thing, managing to prove cuter than Galinda's baby doll collection, which consisted of 58 separate dolls. But that feeling vanished when Galinda's animated voice possibly broke through the sound barrier.

"Why do dogs DO that?! You know? That twirly-sleepy thing!" Galinda squealed, too far into hysteria to realize she was having a fit about a dog's sleeping habits.

"He's making a protective circle to ward off the evil fleas of Quox!" Elphie said snidely, each word dripping with obvious sarcasm.

Perhaps not obvious enough for Galinda.

"You mean…they're real?" Galinda whispered, the color drained from her face faster than Elphie fleeing the room when Galinda was done 'Popularifying' her. She gripped her pink teddy bear, not conscious that the stuffing began to start to flee as well. Either that or the teddy bear had rabies. It's diamond eyes bulged, and its stitches from its previous terrified Galinda moment started coming undone. And then, almost at once, it's programmed message clicked on.

"Click your heels three times!" its mechanical voice sounded.

Galinda looked down at her heels, shrugged, and bashed her heels together three times. She ducked her head and prepared for something to happen. When it didn't she looked up again and whimpered, "Beary, it didn't work! What do I do now!?"

"Click your heels together three times!"

"I've already tried that! And now the evil fleas are going to get me!"

Elphie, until this moment had just been sitting and watching this pathetic display of immaturity, but now Galinda was giving her a migraine. "Galinda! I WAS JOKING!"

"This is no time for joking! ELPHIE! The fleas are coming! The fleas are coming!" Galinda screamed and launched herself next to the small dog. "Protect me!" she shrilly cried and hugged him to her chest. The dog raised a drooping eyelid to stare questioningly at Elphie, she just shrugged. Let the blond think she needed the dog to survive the flea attack, it was a reason to keep the dog and that was good. Plus, Galinda needed protecting from the scary imaginary fleas Elphie wickedly assured herself. And then her mind moved on to matters of greater importance, like what she should name the dog. Toto, she decided. Toto.

A/N: So here you go, the first part in this little story I've started. If you liked it, keep checking in because there is more coming. Also, like I said before, please review!

-Slave to my Pen