51Kim Possible is the property of Disney.
So, what is it like to be a naked mole rat and live in a goofy kid's pocket? Why don't we check with Rufus and find out for ourselves.
MONDAY
He opened his eyes, startled from a deep sleep by the screech of the alarm clock on the bedside table. With a dark scowl, he tossed aside the covers and slammed a fist down on the button, silencing the device. The sun might have been up for over an hour, but seven-thirty still seemed like an indecent hour. From the bed came the deep, hearty snores of the most important person in his world.
Rufus leaped from the bedside table and landed on Ron Stoppable's chest. Squeaking into the boy's ear had no more effect than the alarm had. Determined, the naked mole rat walked up his friend's body, right up to his face, and peeled back an eyelid. When this produced nothing more than more snoring, he pinched the nose closed with both of his little hands, forcing the jaw closed with a foot on the chin. That did it, Ron woke with a start, gasping for air.
"What? Who?..." The lad sat up, blinking rapidly. Rufus was forced to let go his hold on the nose and flew to the foot of the bed. Had the foot board not stopped him, he would have tumbled to the floor and gotten lost in the pile of laundry Mrs. Stoppable had told her son to pick up three days ago. It was something of a morning ritual with the pair. If not for his faithful friend, Ron would invariably sleep in and have to double-time it just to get to school. Even rushing, vice-principal Barkin would catch him in the hall after the bell and assign him extra homework. With Rufus to keep him on the straight and narrow, he'd only gotten two tardies so far this term.
Ron picked up his pal and proceeded to the bathroom, and both went about their morning routines. For the human, that meant a shower, combing the blond mop of hair and brushing his teeth. As a teenage boy, there was liberal use of deodorant. The rodent half of the duo spent most of his time brushing his razor sharp teeth. All he required beyond that was a short bath in the vanity sink. Some days he added bubbles as a treat.
Breakfast at the Stoppable house was a hurried affair involving a couple of slices of toast grabbed from the table on the way out of the door. Rufus would have given one of his whiskers for a cheese omelet, but he had a human to wrangle, and there weren't going to be any delays on his watch. On the other hand, Ron would pay come Saturday morning after Temple. There would be waffles on the table or he just might let the kid get detention.
November in Middleton was pretty cold that year. It was still a week before Thanksgiving and already there was six inches of snow on the ground. In consideration of his hairless companion, Ron had spent a great deal of time sewing a furry liner for his pants pocket. It was made to fit nicely into every pair of cargo pants he owned, both his everyday outfits and his mission clothes. Rufus was grateful, since he could catch up on a lot of his sleep requirements in a nice cozy nest. Given his very unusual lifestyle, he needed all of the rest he could get.
From his place in a young man's pocket, he could hear the bustle of teenagers all around. Now and then there would be a slight bump, as some kid in a hurry would bump into his ride, not realizing the contents of the pocket, but for the most part, his pet human took care to protect him. Lockers were opened and closed all around him, judging from the noise. Yep, still on time, no detention today! Rufus lay curled up with a satisfied little smile on his face.
Then there was a familiar voice, only slightly muffled by the layers of material. He honestly thought that is was the sweetest voice he'd ever heard in his short life, and it was his second favorite. "Morning Ron.", Kim Possible was saying in a bright tone. "How you feeling today, after all of the running around the last while?" Sharp rodent hearing picked up the note of concern in his friend's tone.
Team Possible had been out on two missions in the last week. First it was Monkey Fist, on yet another quest to gain the mystical monkey power for himself. So far the mutated fool didn't know that the jade monkeys had given the special abilities to three people, not two. There was an advantage to being out of sight most of the time. Just the other day, Darkken had failed at yet another insane plot to take over the world. While the humans had done their usual little dance, Rufus had gotten into the weapon du jour and chewed the main power transfer cables. When the current lair had begun to implode, Kim had picked him up and pushed Ron out ahead of her.
Honestly, that boy didn't realize how lucky he was to have a best friend like the red haired human. He knew she was great maybe, but not how much she really meant to him. But then, she hadn't quite figured out her feelings either. One day his humans would have to be pushed to the next step. Well, he'd cross that bridge when he got to it. First, Rufus had to make sure that they both survived to see that day. Between her rushing in where angels fear to tread, and the boy tripping over his own feet, it wan't an easy job. Well, he'd agreed to it when Ron bought him at Smarty Mart.
First class that morning was history. Sometimes, Rufus would listen to the lectures. Humans sure were prone to violence. It seemed like every class revolved around this battle, or that siege. Why couldn't't these creatures learn to follow the example of his species. In nature, mole rats lived by a structured order. Every member of the colony had its place. Fighting was a last resort, not a way to resolve simple conflicts or get what you wanted. Colonies were about cooperation.
Time passed, and finally it was lunch time. The smell of baked cheese woke him from the nap he'd been taking while Ron had been in gym class. Now his nose was going overtime, trying to identify the dish by the aroma. Ravioli, he guessed, and poked his head out of his cloth den. Oh yeah, that was definitely ravioli, a nice conveniently sized food for his tiny hands. "You hungry little buddy?", Ron asked. Stupid question.
"Uh-huh, uh-huh!" The excited mole rat bobbed his head rapidly. His vocabulary in the language of his pets might be limited, but he was starting to make himself understood. Ron almost always got the message. With Kim, he had to speak slower and use a lot of gestures picked up from television and movies. Still, it was progress.
By now most of the staff at Middleton High School had gotten used to what most people called vermin riding around in a student's pocket. Lunch Lady actually liked him. At least there was one being on the property who could appreciate her work, as long as it involved cheese that is. The health inspectors might shut the place down, but what they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. As far as anyone else was concerned, Rufus was simply an appendage of Ron Stoppable. This suited the little guy just fine.
While Kim and Monique babbled about what was new at Club Banana, and Ron and Felix debated their abilities at Monster Mayhem, Rufus made the rounds of each plate on the table. It was habit to leave a small portion of any cheese dish untouched. This was understood to be the "rodent share of the bounty." Bonnie passed the table and watched with disgust. Only the fear she had of Kim's retribution kept her from insulting him or laughing at his table manners.
The afternoon was quiet in the pocket. His human parent was wrestling with algebra again, and the enhanced intelligence that Rufus had once used to help him was gone. Every now and then, he would poke his head out and shake it with sympathy. He'd been able to solve some of the problems, but didn't dare interfere. Mr. Barkin was substituting again, and he knew where the brains were. The last thing Ron needed was extra homework.
After school, the two teens and their owner went to the Possible residence. It was brain meatloaf night again, and once it was sliced beyond recognition, it was one of the best meals going. Jim and Tim were always quick to sneak some of their veggies to him. So far, Mrs. Dr. P hadn't caught on to them yet, so there was plenty of healthy stuff for strong, sharp teeth to work on. (Neither of the boys could be enticed to eat carrots, and Rufus loved them.)
Up in Kim's loft, he had still another nap. It would take Kim the better part of an hour to tutor Ron in math. Secretly, he thought the blond boy was using it as an excuse to continue spending time with the wonderful girl. If he'd been human...
With his teeth brushed, the little guy got himself ready for bed that night. All of the napping he did in the course of the day never prevented him from sleeping at "lights out" time. Of course, naked mole rats really needed almost twenty hours of sleep each day. Or so it said in the manual that Ron had given Kim when she looked after him once. What a weekend that had been!
Ron tucked his diminutive friend into the small bed, a miniature version of his own, that sat on the night stand. "Good night, little buddy. Are you warm enough?" Rufus nodded wearily. With a click, the room was thrown into darkness, and Monday ended for another week.