FF: Your house

Author: Alix33
AN: This v. melodramatic and, to my mind, over the top (but it would not
leave me alone until I wrote it down, for all of its faults) and somewhat
sad song vignette is based on the hidden track on Alanis Morissette's
Grammy-winning album Jagged little pill and I'm appropriating the title of
the track for my fic.
It starts probably in between 'ATW1 and 2' and ends somewhere before 'Back
in the saddle'.

As always, Harm and Mac and all other JAG characters belong to DPB and all
the other organisations and people that they belong to - not me!
Lots of thanks to both of my beta's, Nicole Hammond and grummanchic - any
errors still remaining after this going through their hands/minds, I take
full responsibility for.

Harm's apartment
North of Union Station

Late one night

Harm jerks awake, wild-eyed with fright at his nightmare, in which he saw
Mac being tortured and hurt badly in Paraguay. He gets up, pads downstairs
barefoot and switches on his CD player, where a hauntingly sad song starts
playing.

Harm does not stay to listen to the song's ending. He grabs his keys from
the counter, pulls on a sweatshirt lying across a bar stool, races out of
his loft and takes the stairs two at a time, down to where his SUV is
parked.

He drives away on auto-pilot and is startled to find himself in Mac's
apartment about half an hour later.

Late one night, some months later

Harm had been watching Mac's apartment on and off for days, in between his
crop-dusting duties at Grace Aviation. He thought of Mac a lot and each time
he did, his heart broke a little more and he beat himself up a lot more.

She wasn't home. He thought of the song he heard after his nightmare, so
many months ago - it now told precisely what he did once he got to Mac's
apartment that night. The song and Mac alternated in his mind, almost. He
smiled wryly and sadly.

He snuck back into Mac's apartment - very quietly and unobtrusively, or, as
quietly and unobtrusively as a 6 foot 4 ex-spook could - and, once again,
switched on the CD player - Mac's, this time. He recognized the song that
was playing.

But it did not end there. The rest of the song made him gasp in pain, as it
mirrored Paraguay, and his losing Mac there when she said 'never', so very
achingly closely.