44Chapter Two: Trust and Expectations
Scorpius was irritable from lack of sleep when he went to sit at the Gryffindor table with Albus. Sitting across from him was the face he had been unable to erase from his mind; their eyes connected for a second before Lily went back to her breakfast cereal and him to his toast.
"So Lily, spill," said Lucy Weasley, grinning as she sat down next to her slender cousin. Lucy was a fourteen-year-old Hufflepuff and quite the gossip sleuth, much to the irritation of her older cousins, whose business she was constantly involved in. In fact they had a running joke about her becoming the next Rita Skeeter, not that they would tell her that. "What happened last night?"
Lily threw a glance at Scorpius. "I don't know what you mean," she replied nonchalantly.
"I was waiting outside the portrait hole with some friends when the Fat Lady told me some interesting information about you. She said that you returned to the common room rather late last night, with a boy from another house. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"Is that so, Lily? Well, out with it. Who is this berk and how would you prefer me to kill him? If you tell me now, I'll make it at painless as possible," teased Albus.
Lily relaxed visibly with the knowledge that Scorpius hadn't told after all. She rolled her eyes at her brother. Mornings were one of the rare times where Lily spoke; aside from that, she kept quiet unless she was spoken to. Perhaps she was happier in the mornings because Lily knew she could look forward to a whole day without nightmares. "You lot have your knickers in a knot for nothing. The Fat Lady must have mistaken someone else for me."
"You can't trick me, Lily, I've done my research. I talked to one of your housemates and she said she woke to find you gone at about midnight. I'll get to the bottom of this, Lils, I promise," said Lucy with a grin; she had just wanted to see if Lily was hiding something, to which the answer was obviously yes. Satisfied with this, she skipped off to meet her friends in the Entrance Hall.
"Who is he then, fess up!" demanded Rose Weasley, who was sitting on her other side, with a grin.
"Not you too…" Lily groaned as Albus snickered in amusement. She sighed, standing up and slinging her bag over her shoulder. She preferred to avoid confrontation where possible. "I'm going to potions."
Scorpius sprang to his feet. "Wait a second, Lily. I'm going that way, I'll walk with you."
"See if you can get a name out of her, Scorp," Albus called out to him as they disappeared into the Entrance Hall.
"I thought they'd never stop," Lily grumbled.
"Don't worry, I'll find a way to distract Albus from the topic… hopefully he'll forget by the end of today. But about last night… well, I was wondering, is there anything you'd like to talk about?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it must have been hard… er, keeping that all to yourself for all those years. I just thought you might like to talk, since I know now,"
"It's kind of you to offer, but talking about it won't bring them back, or erase what happened… plus, I'm dealing with it just fine," she replied casually, but Scorpius cause a hint of defensiveness.
"It won't bring them back, but at least it can give you some closure. I've been here at Hogwarts since your first day, and I've seen you, Lily. I've heard stories about you running away from classes, bursting into tears in History of Magic. You barely talk to anyone, you've always got bags under your eyes, you're sleepwalking… that doesn't strike me as dealing with it at all. Are you just going to let it plague you for the rest of your life?"
Lily paused, but she didn't turn to look at him, instead staring at the leather-bound book she was holding. Lily dug her nails into it, a warning sign if ever there was one. He had spoken an undeniable truth that she had never wanted to acknowledge. She had ignored this for six years, and in the space of one day he was forcing her to face up to it.
"You've never spoken to me for more than five minutes, and now you think you know what's best for me?" she questioned as coolly as possible, her voice shaking slightly; Scorpius was unsure whether this was with anger or upset. Lily never showed much emotion around those who weren't family, her face was carefully controlled; that he had made her lose this control, worried him.
"No, no, of course not," he replied as softly as possibly, attempting to placate her. "It's just that after six years, you don't seem to be anywhere near dealing with it. I just want to help you,"
"And how exactly do you plan to do that?"
Scorpius frowned. "I don't know… how about… what about you let me see it? I can search for the people involved and you don't have to hear about it from me unless I'm sure I've found the right person. Would you feel better knowing the persons responsible have been brought to justice?"
"Oh, I see what this is," she said quietly. "You want to be the one that solves the famous mystery of the deaths of the Potters so you can fast-track your career as an Auror, that's what this is about."
"What?!" he blurted out, irritated that she would think he would only want to help her for his own personal gain. Then again, her paranoia wasn't completely surprising, and was to be expected after what she had been through. "It has nothing to do with that and everything to do with me trying to help you. If that won't help, then please, tell me how I can,"
"I don't know," replied Lily exasperatedly. "If I knew how to deal with it do you really think I'd be… like this? Whatever's wrong with me, there is no answer to it. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to be late to potions."
Scorpius sighed as he watched her disappear into the shadows of the dungeons. He couldn't remember being so at a loss before. He couldn't fathom the reason why this was affecting him so; he helped people when they asked for it, but he had never bothered to go out of his way. Now that he had, he had no idea of a possible solution. Frustrated, he headed to the library for his free period to study.
"Hey Albus. Where's Lily?" Scorpius questioned casually as he sat down across from Albus at lunch, scanning the room to make sure she wasn't sitting with a group of friends at another house table like he tended to do.
"Hmm, you two walk off together after breakfast today and now you're asking where she is… I must tell you Scorpius, I'm getting a little worried here," Albus joked.
Scorpius rolled his eyes, snickering. "I was just asking out of curiosity, not because I want to seduce her or anything."
"To be serious for just a moment, I honestly don't know what to do with her," Albus sighed, the joking nature evaporated. "Her friend Mollie asked me if anything was wrong with her, she walked out of potions halfway through, apparently, crying. It's because of the anniversary of mum and dad's death, that much I'm sure about, but that was six years ago. James and I have managed to move on, but she can't let go… I don't understand it."
Scorpius felt a pang of guilt at this, wondering whether he should tell Albus. He was obviously worried, and had a right to know. But he had promised Lily that he wouldn't tell him. "Er, do you want me to go talk to her? Perhaps she might open up to someone from outside the family," he offered, desperately hoping that his talk with Lily earlier hadn't been the cause of her leaving class early.
Albus shrugged. "Go for your life, if you think you'll be able to help. I already checked the map; she's in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. If you get anything out of her, tell me, alright?"
"This is the girl's lavatory, you know," said a girl from a younger year on her way out, a cheeky grin on her face and a Ravenclaw crest on her robes. Her companion giggled. Scorpius blushed furiously but did not reply.
Once they left there was silence. Scorpius wondered whether Lily had left the bathroom. "Lily," he called out awkwardly, stopping to listen to the door of the first stall, "Lily, are you in here?"
A door two stalls down a door was slowly unlocked, and Lily stared down the row at him. "Scorpius?" she questioned softly. Realising she had not imagined the voice and was not seeing things, she wiped her puffy eyes and walked past him to the sink to wash her hands. "What are you doing here?"
"Albus was worried about you," he replied. "And… well, I owe you an apology for this morning… It was obvious you didn't want to talk about things, but I pushed you anyway… I didn't mean to upset you."
"It wasn't you. After all, you said it this morning; I burst out into tears all the time don't I," Lily replied, her eyes stinging. Scorpius felt paralysed, mentally hitting himself for his comments, despite his good intentions. He had assumed that his words would have little effect on Lily, and once again he had been proven incorrect by her unpredictable nature. He stood stock-still, his mouth opening and closing like a fish taken out of its bowl; what was he going to say now?
All his plans had been thrown out the window; now he was going to have to play it by ear. Scorpius had never been too good at dealing with the emotions of women, which was clear as he stood dumbstruck. He walked over to her slowly, attempting to think of a reply.
"That's what everyone thinks of me, isn't it?" she questioned, unable to contain her emotions anymore; her shoulders shook with quaking sobs. Scorpius placed a hand gently on her shoulder and felt what was becoming a familiar jolt as she buried her head in his chest, sobbing. After the couple of seconds his mind took to comprehend what was happening, he placed a comforting arm around her, the other one stroking her soft hair. "Just like Peeves says – Loony Lily Potter."
"It's not your fault," Scorpius said gently, finally finding his voice. "You saw something really traumatic, something that can't just be erased from memory… if I was in your position I wouldn't be coping half as well as you are."
Scorpius has been gone for quite a while now, Albus reflected, as he sat at the Gryffindor table eating the crust of his sandwich. I guess I shouldn't have expected him to be back so soon. He's hopeless with women, he thought to himself. In fact, she's probably crying more now. Better go see what's happening…
He walked briskly to the girl's lavatory, nonchalantly saying hi to a few of his classmates as they passed him. When he reached his destination, however, he paused at what he saw from the doorway, then sprang to the side so he was out of sight. He wondered if his glasses were failing him, because surely Scorpius couldn't have been kissing Lily. It looked like it, but Scorpius had told him just this morning that he didn't want to 'seduce her'.
Albus heard their voices, but the echo in the bathroom made it incomprehensible to him; footsteps seemed to be approaching the entrance, so he set off to his next class, Charms, as quickly as possible.
Scorpius was the last to enter the Charms classroom, and was slightly out of breath as he took a seat behind Albus. "Hey," Scorpius whispered as Professor Traverse begun her lecture. He frowned slightly as he got no reply from Albus, and decided to kick the back of his chair to get his attention. "Hey, Al. Aren't you going to ask about Lily?"
"Yes, I think I will," hissed Albus coldly, as to not draw attention from the teacher. "What exactly were you doing snogging my sister?"
"What?" Scorpius blurted, a little more loudly than intended. "I wasn't snogging your sister!"
"Well it sure looked like it to me," Albus replied, not troubling to keep his voice down as he turned around angrily to face Scorpius.
"Excuse me Mr Potter, Mr Malfoy," said Professor Traverse coldly, "I'm very sorry to be interrupting what I'm sure was a fascinating conversation, but you may want to consider paying attention. That is, if you wish to pass your N.E.W.T.S., which, may I add, are becoming ever closer. And Mr Malfoy, as Head Boy you are setting an astonishingly bad example for your fellow students. You can both join me for detention."
Albus, who had been staring Scorpius down, turned back to face the front, leaving Scorpius to stew in questions. What was Albus on about? Had he mistaken his comforting hug for trying to beguile his sister? And if that was the case, why was he so upset about it? He clearly remembered Albus once saying 'I'd rather you than someone else', though he hadn't really thought about that until now. So what was his problem?
Scorpius tried kicking Albus' chair numerous times that lesson, but to no avail. During their detention all was silent as they scrubbed the desks in the classroom by hand, as Professor Traverse was breathing down their necks.
When they finally were allowed to leave the classroom, Scorpius wasted no time in trying to figure out what was happening. "So, what exactly is going on here, if you don't mind me asking?"
"Nothing, just you lying to me about my sister. I saw you two kissing in the girl's bathroom. Is that why you walked her to potions as well? I should have guessed, you said you were walking her way… yeah right, last time I checked, the dungeons and the library were on completely different sides of the castle."
"You got it wrong, mate. She was upset and I was comforting her, not snogging her," Scorpius replied, angry that Albus wouldn't believe him. Even if all signs did point in that direction, his best friend should have believed his honesty.
"Comforting her? I've known you for six years, you're not the comforting type," Albus replied disbelievingly.
"What else was I supposed to do? She burst out crying, was I supposed to tap her on the shoulder and command her to stop? And for the record, she put her arms around me,"
"That's the case, is it? What was she so upset about then?" questioned Albus, his tone no less accusatory.
"I'd tell you, but I promised her not to tell anyone, especially you," said Scorpius truthfully. His tone was even, but inside he was growing increasingly frustrated.
"How convenient," Albus replied sarcastically.
"Get it through your thick head, Al! I'm not dating your sister. Even if I was snogging your sister – which I wasn't, and I'm not – what's the problem? Don't you trust me or something?"
"Well aside from the fact that you lied to me, Lily is a fragile person. If you haven't got it so far, I don't know how to make it more obvious to you other than saying she has problems. There's enough on her plate without having a boyfriend to deal with,"
"Deal with? I'm your best friend, why do you think I'd be bad for her? Maybe I want to help her. But look, the point is I'm not dating her, so that doesn't even matter. I don't know why I'm even having this conversation with you."
"Good, that means it can end now," said Albus as they entered the Great Hall for dinner.
Scorpius walked to his house table, throwing a couple of murderous glances over his shoulder as he did so, while Albus flounced down angrily next to Lily.
"Hey Albus," she greeted him, considerably more cheery than she had been earlier. Talking to Scorpius had actually made her feel a lot better. He had been positively sweet to her; that was a side of him that she had never before seen, or expected to see. She had decided that perhaps showing him the memory would help, that way she could have someone to talk about it with, someone who understood the horrors of what she had witnessed. However these thoughts were pushed from her mind at the furious look Albus gave her. "What was that look for?"
"When were you planning to tell me, exactly?"
Lily's stomach dropped. He knew. Scorpius… He couldn't have… he wouldn't have… she thought to herself. After going to all that effort to gain her trust, surely Scorpius wouldn't have told her brother about what he had found out? He promised… "Scorpius told you?" she choked, her eyes already starting to water once more.
"He may as well have. I can't believe it… hey, where are you going? Lily?" Albus watched as his sister rose from her seat and ran from the Great Hall.
Over at the Slytherin table, Scorpius was unaware of the conversation between the siblings. He angrily stabbed at a potato, feeling absolutely livid at Albus. For someone who was supposedly his best friend, Albus sure expected the worst from him. Scorpius felt relieved once dinner was over, he wanted nothing better than to go to his dormitory and sleep right away. He stood up and made his way toward the Entrance Hall. Maybe tomorrow Albus would be more inclined to listen to reason.
However his plans for peace and rest were shattered when Lily walked over to him and slapped him hard on the side of the face, the loud echo gathering the attention of the exiting students. "I can't believe you told him!" Lily yelled.
"What the hell are you on about? I swear, your whole family is stark raving mad-"
"Don't pretend, Albus was furious, he said-"
"Wait a second-" Scorpius attempted to interject, aware of the crowd of onlookers.
"No! I trusted you, and you did the one thing I asked you not to!"
"Lily, listen to me," Scorpius said loudly but calmly, gripping both of her arms firmly with his. He was somewhat surprised as she did as he asked. Scorpius lowered his voice, bending down to eye level. "Your brother has it in his head that I've been snogging you, that's what he's talking about. I haven't broken my promise, nor was I planning to."
Lily's green eyes scanned his grey ones, as though she could ascertain the truth from the look in his eyes. Scorpius saw a flicker of realization reflected in them before he dropped her arms and drew himself up to his full height, trying to look unconcerned about the fact that everyone seemed to be watching them. "But thanks for listening to me before jumping to conclusions. I guess it just shows that like everyone else, you expect the worst of me."
Scorpius turned on his heel and began walking toward the dungeons as quickly as he could, willing this day to end. He rubbed his jaw somewhat sorely, wonderful if it was possible for a bone to bruise. At least she hadn't punched him in the eye.
"Scorpius, wait! Please, wait Scorpius," called Lily, chasing after him. She was thankful that he stopped to wait for her, though he crossed his arms defensively as he turned around to lean on the wall.
"What is it, Potter," he replied coolly.
"Look, I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions. I didn't believe you'd do that; it's just that when he said it, I didn't know what else he could have been talking about. I should have listened to you, instead of making a bad day more rotten – for both of us."
Scorpius sighed. "You know, you really need to learn that not everyone is out to get you."
"I know. I'm trying … I'm trying to trust you. But trusting someone isn't as easy as you'd think. People can surprise you, even when you think you've got it all figured out… but you've surprised me in a good way. I'm sorry for assuming the worst; I promise I won't do it again."
Scorpius nodded. "I forgive you. But I'm afraid if I don't get some sleep soon my head is going to explode… are we still on for tomorrow? You know, the memory?"
Lily nodded. "Of course. That is, if you still want to help me after seeing this side of me…"
Scorpius laughed. "Well, if that's the worst you get, I think I can handle it… goodnight."
"'Night, Scorpius."
Author's Note: No luck with finding a better title, but I did change the summary. And as you can see, this Albus is different to my other Albus. He's mixed with James; antagonist and best friend all in one, how is that for multi-tasking?
Anyway, sorry it took me so long to update... I'd love to say I'll be quicker next time, but I just got this MASSIVE essay to do. It's HUGE. So updates may be sporadic for the next month. That being said, I'm not going to give up on this story, so hang in there :)
Disclaimer: I own Mollie and Professor Traverse, and some more characters to come... you won't want to steal them, trust me. However, Albus, Lily and Scorpius are all trademarks of JKRowling, who I am not affiliated with in any way, nor am I pretending to be. Therefore, please don't sue me.