Freedom
The skin around her nose and eyes were raw from rubbing. Her head hurt from losing so much water. Her stomach ached with hunger, but any thought of eating sickened her. Every inch of Hermione's being throbbed with grief. She simply couldn't work any more; her mind was controlled by her emotions and her body was ruled by her guilt. And to think it all started months earlier…
I hate it when they leave me alone in this house. Death Eaters lurking outside, floor boards creaking when no one is there and that horrible portrait make it impossible to retain your sanity. So here sat Hermione Granger brightest witch of the age with a book crammed into a narrow hallway sitting on the dirty, dusty floor waiting with anxiety for Ron and Harry to return.
She must have dosed off at some point because she woke up with a horrible crick in her neck. Groaning Hermione slowly stood stumbling as she made her way to her bedroom (in order to get some proper sleep). She heard a creak behind her and that was all the warning she had before a pair of arms closed around her. Hermione kicked and screamed as the unknown figure dragged her into the closest room, cursing as she nailed him in the shin.
"Behave and I'll let you go! If I wanted you dead I would have killed you a long time ago!" hissed a deep voice next to Hermione ear. The attacker was definatly male.
"Bull shit!"
"Listen I just need you to listen to me! Without your wand preferably…"
"You think I'm just going to just give you my wand? Are you high?!"
"Listen I'm going to let go of you and you are not going to attack me alright?"
"Alright-" idiot
As soon as that word came out of her mouth Hermione was thrown across the room. Falling on the splintering floor she hissed as she gingerly stood up. Suddenly remembering that there were more important things than some splinters in her palms, Hermione whirled around realizing as she did so that her wand was no where on her person. The sight that greeted her turned her blood cold.
There facing her was calm, calculating Severus Snape. Traitor to the Order of the Phoenix and murderer of Albus Dumbledore. Standing, holding her wand. How come she didn't hear him bypass Moody's defenses?!
"How..?"
"I understand that you must believe me to have betrayed the order but I have not."
How killing Albus Dumbledore could be considered anything other than sabotaging the order Hermione had no clue. He murdered the only person Voldemort had ever feared and yet he expected her to believe that he was innocent! What that he hadn't really done it, it was another Death Eater? Harry had seen him… how could he explain that away? Hermione decided to play along with his little game; he had her wand she just had to lull him into a false sense of security…
"Albus ordered me to kill him" this statement was met with silence
"….why?" she croaked a few moments later
"He was already dieing and he wished to use his death as a tool in the war. Much the way he used others for so long-"
"Don't talk about him like that! He wasn't dieing…he was fine…he was-"
"Do you recall seeing his had black and shriveled?"
"Harry had mentio-"
"That came from Dark Magic, I don't know from where he wouldn't tell me, but it was killing him slowly. Everyday he became weaker and weaker, physically and magically. He wanted to use his death to the advantage of the order. He had used a debt I owed in order to ensure I would actually do the deed."
"What did you owe him?"
"That…is none of your business little girl, I'm here to say that you have to light a fire under potter's ass and get him to do whatever it is Dumbledore left for him to do. Voldemort-"
"I've never heard you say his name, only 'The Dark Lord' why is that?"
"I try to stay in character as much of the time as possible, I try to stay consistent in some fashions other wise I might slip up one of these days"
"Why are you telling me all of these things?"
"I'm hoping that you will believe me. The Dark Lord is almost ready to start a siege on Hogwarts, and whatever Potter and you have been planning it's been taking too damn long."
"I'll believe you if you do one thing for me"
"And what is that Miss. Granger?"
"Tell me the answer to one question"
"Ask and I'll see how ridiculous it is"
"Why did you decide to be a spy for the Order?"
A long pause followed this question. Hermione's large brown eyes staring intently into Snape's black pools, urging him to answer the bloody question, how did he expect her not to call every order member as soon as she got back her wand? Hermione realized she believed him, well part of her any way. At what point in the conversation she began believing him she wasn't quite sure.
The towering black form of Snape seemed move in one great motion as he sighed deeply.
"It…was a woman" he said softly
Whatever Hermione had been expecting it wasn't that.
"…what happened to-?"
"She died."
"Oh"
A faint "Severus Snape" could be heard from downstairs. It seemed to break the moment they had shared for several minutes as both of them snapped back to reality. In one fluid motion Snape aimed his wand at Hermione and light filled her vision before she could so much as gasp.
A few minutes Ron and Harry found Hermione in the library asleep with her wand next to her prone body. Upon waking Hermione she remembered a voice whispering to her in her unconscious state
"Do not tell anyone of the situation, Dumbledore did not wish for anyone to know what happened until after the war has ended"
Several months later Severus Snape was dead. And by then everyone knew that he was innocent. The question that haunted Hermione, that made her cry when no one there to see, was if she had told anyone of his innocence, would he be alive today?
He watched her sleep. The skin around her nose and eyes was red and sore from crying, her hair tangled and neglected. He was alive. With no master. With no duty. Off to live some quiet life alone. He didn't want to leave her this way. The brilliant little know it all haunted by guilt all of her sunny little life.
She felt her bed shift as a weight was applied to the corner next to her feet. She woke up to a pale face with pitch black eyes staring at her.
"you're dead…" she croaked softly
"It seems like quite the opposite to me"
"This is just a dream...my mind trying to rid itself of guilt"
"This is not a dream. I am very much sitting at the foot of your very small bed. Which does seem a bit inappropriate…"
"I'm sorry…" she whispered trying to hold back tears
"What is there to be sorry about?"
"That I treated you so awfully when you where alive…that you might be alive if I had done something…"
Hermione sat up looking intently into his eyes. The moonlight catcing on the tear tracks that made their way silently down her face
"I'm so sorry"
Before he could stop himself Snape reached out his hand and wiped her tears.
"If, if you're alive how…did you do it?"
"Let me have my secrets Miss. Granger"
She laughed sobbing slightly as she did so
"My mind isn't creative enough to come up with some alternate truth! I never was any good at lying…"
"You can pinch me if you like, would you be convinced then if you did so?" interjected in a soft tone offering his hand to her
She tried to stifle a louder sob. Looking pleadingly into his eyes biting her bottom lip as she did so. She shifted herself for a few moments breaking eye contact. She took his wrist and pulled him towards her.
When they were inches apart she hugged him burying her face into his chest. For the first few moments he sat there awkwardly letting her hug him eventually he put his arms around her and put his chin on the crown of her head.
"Try to not get so much mucus on my robes..." he whispered
She giggled a wet laugh into his chest
Should I continue this? So far it could actually be considered canon…which is reeeeeaaaaally weird because I am such an hg/ss fan and we do not do canon. What is also strange is this piece could be taken as not romantic at all, only if I add another chapter… so do you want me to? If you like my writing style you could pop over to my longer ss/hg story 'Flowers in Winter' if not then why have you bothered to read the Author's note?! This piece is called Freedom because Severus is now free of all the responsibilities he has had for decades. Both masters are dead, and so is he to the rest of the wizarding world.
much love
nHc