Good news, people! I've decided to continue the vampire version of Tamer of the Hazard because of generally positive responses. BUT! It won't follow the same storyline as the original, so it can't really be called Tamer of the Hazard...I don't even know if I'll put the digimon transformation abilities in. Don't you think Takato's badass enough as a vampiric hitman?

Meh, I'll leave the fate of this story up to you, my loyal readers.

Anyway, enjoy!

BTW, this chapter contains a bit of Rukatoness.


After a fifteen minute drive, Takato arrived at his home and parked his new truck out front. He stood outside of the house/bakery for a few seconds, then took off his sunglasses, showing his now blazing red eyes.

He was using his Blood Vision ability, normally something only very experienced vampires could do. From his point of view, then entire world was made up of different shades of blue. But anything that could be a valid prey item was highlighted by a deep, pulsing, form-fitting, crimson outline. The pulse of the outline was in-time with the beating of the prey item's heart, and would increase when the prey was scared, alert, or was very active. It would also decrease when the prey was asleep, or completely relaxed for whatever reason.

But certain things would show up as other colors. For example: other vampires showed up as dull orange, showing that he could still feed on them, but it was at his own risk. Werewolves were highlighted in pale yellow, almost white, in their human forms, but bright gold in their beast forms. Digimon would show up as green when they first bio-emerged, but would slowly shift to purple the longer they stayed in the Human World. Takato never knew what that meant, but never really bothered finding out.

He was currently checking to see if anyone, besides his parents and Guilmon, were inside. Scanning the house, he saw two crimson outlines and one bright purple. They were still up and about, which was sort of surprising, since it was well past midnight, and they were early risers.

"Maybe they're waiting for me?" he shrugged, then took the weapons out of the back of the truck and smirked. "Well, I finally got that FN P90 dad wanted." he walked up and knocked on the door.

"Who is it? Can't you see we're closed?" Takato's father, Takehiro Matsuki, said.

"Dad, open the damned door, and put down the Remington!" the door was unlocked and Takehiro poked his head out.

"Were you followed?" he asked, looking around.

Takato rolled his eyes. "I'm the government assassin, yet you're the paranoid one. Weird how that works out, eh?"

Takehiro snorted and opened the door for his son. "So, what's the haul this time around?" he knew he could always count on Takato to bring home new toys!

Takato smirked as he sat the weapons down on the couch. "Look for yourself, there's a few more in the truck."

"Truck?" Takehiro rose an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I got me a truck now." Takato said off-handedly, using a faint accent.

His father just shook his head and started sifting through the assorted guns.

Takato was rummaging around for stray bullets when he heard his father's shout of glee. "Guess he found it."

Mie Matuski walked down the stairs to witness her husband off in his own little world, the world he went to when he finally got something he had wanted for a long time.

She sighed. "What is it with men and guns?" she shook her head and went to the door to welcome her son home. She found him with half his body underneath one of the back seats and his legs handing out of the back door of a black truck. "Do you have a license, young man?" she laughed when Takato smashed his head on the underside of the seat.

"Oh, hey, Mom! The Agency is taking care of all the legal stuff, as well as the...modifications."

Mie shook her head. "Missiles in the headlights?"

Takato was about to ask how she knew, but just shut his mouth and nodded. She was his mother, most of the time she knew what he was going to do before he did.

"Oh yeah, I've been given some time off, so if you have anything planned, I won't be called out for quite a while." Takato stuffed the last bullet he had found into the magazine of an M4A1, then closed the back door. He walked over and gave his mother a hug.

Mie gave her son a quick peck on the cheek. "Oh, don't worry about that. I've noticed you've been growing a little distant from your friends, so you should use this time to do something with them."

Takato knew she was right, so he just nodded and walked inside. "I've got to take the truck in, so I'm just stopping by to drop off the 'cargo' and grab a drink." he went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. "Hey, mom, where's the-"

"Behind the orange juice, we finally put in that back compartment. The code is 8-5-12-12. We can't have any of your friends coming by, wanting something to drink, and finding a bunch of blood, now can we?"(1)

Takato just nodded, sometimes mothers were too smart for their child's own good. He moved the orange juice aside and found a small, unassuming box. He pushed on the box and the front slid open, revealing the keypad. After putting in the code, he heard a slight hissing noise, then the box sunk into the back of the fridge and the entire thing slid up, revealing packs of medical blood hanging from rows of racks. He took two, then poked his head out and looked at his parents.

"You want anything while I'm in here?" he asked.

Mie shook her head. "No, we're fine, we already ate dinner." she gave him "The Look".

Takato closed the refrigerator door and hung his head. "I'm sorry, Mom, but it wasn't my fault! You know I can't go against orders."

"But what about, 'Your mission, should you choose to accept it'?"

"Okay, one: That only happens in Mission Impossible. Two: The other two Agents in the area were off duty. And three: It provided me with enough blood for two weeks, at least! As long as I keep the use of my powers to a minimum, that is."

"Then what's with those?" Mie pointed at the blood packs.

"Some of the guys I fed on were...messed up, if you know what I mean. I need something to get the taste out of my mouth." he tore open both packs and downed them at the same time. "And nothing does that like AB Postitive!" he sighed happily and put the empty packs into a hidden shaft in the wall that went down past the basement, deep underground, where they landed in a vat of acid in Takato's personal "Interrogation" room.

"Takatomon, you're finally home?" Guilmon's nasaly, child-like voice called out as the digimon came down the stairs to greet his Tamer.

"I know I gave up on this years ago, but come on, I'm not a digimon!" Takato whined, sounding just like he did back when he first became a Tamer.

"I know, Guilmon just likes to annoy Takatomon!" Guilmon tackled his Tamer to the floor.

Takato landed with grunt and squirmed when Guilmon licked his face. "What's it been, five years since I first created you? I'm still not used to that tackle." he groaned. 'But it sure as hell beats having a car dropped on me.' he grimaced at the shitstorm that particular mission turned into.

Dropped into a foreign country with nothing but weapons, clothes, and a partner. The one time they listen to his requests and grant him a partner, what do they do? They give him the Rookie. What does the Rookie do? He fucks everything up by taking it upon himself to kill all of the target's guards, causing Takato, who'd had his crosshairs trained on the head of said target, to become severely pissed off. What happened to the Rookie? He provided a great distraction, allowing Takato to get into the mansion and kill the target directly. Then he ran out of ammo and was eaten alive by guard dogs.

Takato didn't even spare the Rookie a glance as he ran to the extraction point. He didn't even want to waste a bullet to put him out of his misery. The guy was a jackass that refused to "follow orders from kids", as he had put it, regardless of the fact that the "kid" was his superior in every possible way. He served his purpose, and died doing his job.

It was for the best anyway. Had Takato been forced into another mission with that idiot, he would have killed the man himself. And he wouldn't have been as quick about it as the dogs were.

Takato got to his feet after Guilmon went back upstairs to do...whatever it was he was doing before Takato got back.

'I hope he's not messing with the computer again.' he remembered what had happened the last time.

Guilmon had discovered the wonders of the Google search engine. And, in his infinite innocence, decided to type in Takato's name. Well, apparently there was a pornstar that had been using the alias "Takato" for the past year. Guilmon recognized that the man wasn't his Tamer, but he didn't understand what the man was doing with those other two women. So, thinking that his Tamer was some kind of bottomless well of information, he asked Takato.

Now, this wouldn't have been so bad, had Guilmon not chosen the WORST possible moment to ask; a Tamer meeting. And EVERYONE was there, even Ryo and Henry's little sister, Suzie. And, to make matters even worse, Guilmon had printed out pictures, and had used a marker to circle anything he didn't understand about the pictures.

Out of all the things everyone expected him to do, chicken out, make up something incredibly stupid, or make an awkward joke, they never expected him to break down in a fit of laughter.

When asked why, all he said was, "It sucks to be me right now!" then kept laughing.

Later, after he and Guilmon were safely within the walls of the bakery, and Takato's parents were out, he told Guilmon most of what he knew about the "Birds and the Bees". But Guilmon, with his painfully short attention span, barely caught a word of it. He was content with the knowledge that his Tamer knew a lot about the subject, and figured he could ask him at anytime. So why pay attention now, when a bat had chosen that moment to make its presence known?

Takato sighed and went into the living room, where his father was still cradling the P90.

"So, I take it you like the gun?" Takato deadpanned.

Takehiro looked at him like he was insane. "Are you shitting me? Like it? I freakin' LOVE it! This thing is 6.6 pounds of pure ass-kickage!" he chuckled evilly. "How many mags did you get?"

Takato shrugged. "I only picked up two of the weapons, but I took all the ammo from everyone I killed, so...there should be around 4 or 500 magazines, total, around here, not including the stuff we already had. I probably picked up 30, or so, P90 mags." he picked up the large duffelbag sitting next to his dad. "All of the ammo should be in here." he looked at the bag and sweadropped. "But good luck sorting all this out."

"Don't worry, you'll be helping me when you get back." Takehiro said, not bothering to look up.

Takato shrugged. "Why not? I'm completely fuckin' wired right now, and I've got nothing to do. Hey, Mom, you going back to bed?"

Mie shook her head. "I'm just like you, I've got too much energy to burn, and nothing to do. I guess I'll take a trip down to the video store and pick up some movies."

Takato nodded and opened the door to walk out, but was hit in the face with a metal briefcase as soon as he stepped out. It didn't effect him at all, but it was annoying. He heard screeching tires and saw black, unmarked van speeding away.

"Payment's here." he tossed the briefcase to his mother. "Pick me up a few vids, too."

"Anything specific?"

"Hmm...Nope, surprise me." Takato ducked out, started up the truck, and drove off into the night.

(Morning, 7:30AM)

Takato's eyes snapped open as a ray of sunlight hit his exposed hand. Contrary to popular belief, vampires weren't burned to a crisp by sunlight. In fact, nothing short of a high-powered UV lamp would do anything to them. Cause them to be highly irritable, yes. Cause them to burst into flames and burn to ashes, no. And Takato, being of the upper echelon of the vampiric ranks, was completely resistant to all of the adverse effects of sunlight. Though he still didn't like it, all it really did was make him itch from time to time.

Unknown to his friends, that was the real reason he scratched the back of his head so much. It wasn't his fault that sunlight just happened to make him itch whenever he did something stupid or embarrassing.

Takato scratched his hand and sat up in his bed. Another misconception about vampires was that they all, even ones powerful enough to resist sunlight, needed to sleep during the day, and only awoke if they were in danger. Vampires rarely ever needed to sleep, as long as they had a steady supply of blood. Sleeping, for a vampire, was just like feeding. It recharged their powers, which were finite, and kept them from going berserk when they didn't feed.

This was the reason vampires went into hibernation when food supplies ran low. Otherwise they would go insane and destroy everything around them. Sleeping also helped them feel like normal people, since it let them keep the daytime scheduels they had as humans.

Guilmon also awoke at the same time as he Tamer, having gained the energy to do so through their bond.

"So, Takatomon, what are we doing today?" Guilmon asked as Takato walked into the bathroom.

"Don't know, but it's gotta be something fun...Something that we haven't done in a while. I do know one thing, though, we gotta get everyone together for this. It's Saturday, and I happen to know none of them have plans." Takato answered.

Guilmon rubbed his chin with a claw. "How about you do some of those magic tricks for them?"

"Great idea! They don't know I'm an 'ametuer' magician, and my 'act' is sure to freak them all out! But we gotta do something after that...I know! The new arcade that opened up last week! I'm pretty sure they haven't been able to get in yet, especially with their digimon. I'll call in that favor Shino owes me and we'll get in for free, partners and all!" Takato walked out of the bathroom, fully dressed for the day's activities.

"Yay! Arcade!" Takato was half expecting the dinosaur to ask what an arcade was, but, instead, he just grinned. "Now I can finally get my revenge on Renamon!"

Takato rose an eyebrow, then remembered the time Renamon had absolutely destroyed Guilmon in a fighter jet flight simulator. Guilmon had been practicing with Ace Combat 6 for weeks, and felt he was ready to kick the kitsune's tail and make her eat his afterburner!

The Tamer just shook his head and went downstairs, his partner in tow.

"Morning, sweety!" Mie called from the kitchen.

"Morning, Mom!" Takato gave his mother a hug and a kiss. "What's for breakfast?"

"Oh, just the usual. Are you staying, or do you have other plans?"

Takato chuckled. "I swear you can read my mind sometimes."

Mie turned to him with a very creepy look and glowing eyes. "Only sometimes?"

Takato shrank into his seat and stared at his mother. 'Now I know why Dad is so whipped.' he thought.

"I wouldn't say he's whipped...He just knows how to follow orders! Must be the military background." Mie said cheerfully, then went back to cooking.

Takato just sat there, mouth agape, doing a perfect impression of a fish out of water. "You...You really can read my mind, can't you?"

Mie just turned and nodded with a smile. "You being a blood relative makes it easier, but yes, vampires can read minds. It's not an ability you'll pick up for at least another century, no matter how strong you are." she was about to turn back around, but stopped when she saw Takato's sad expression.

"Yeah...another century..." he stirred his glass of blood around a bit. "Do you ever get tired of it?"

Mie sighed, she knew what he was talking about. "To be honest, yes, sometimes I do. Outliving all of my friends, my previous husbands, everyone but my family. It does get tiresome, knowing that I'll probably walk this world for eternity, never changing, unless I want to. Changing my name every seventy, or so, years. It doesn't bother me nearly as much as it used to, but I still find myself thinking sometimes."

Takato continued to look at the blood, watching it swirl like a whirlpool. "How did you cope with it at first?"

"I did what all vampires eventually do; I asked my friends if they wanted to join me in immortality. All of them turned me down, and some even ran from me...But only one understood, and only he joined me." Mie smiled as she felt her husband's arms wrap around her waist from behind.

"And it was the best decision I ever made." Takehiro nuzzled his wife's neck, causing her to giggle.

"Oh, get a room, you two!" Takato downed his blood and looked away. Seeing his parents being intimate was something he never enjoyed.

His father turned around with a smirk. "Hey, how would you feel if we said that to you when you, eventually, bring a ladyfriend home?"

Takato had the decency to blush and he got up from his seat. "Bye, Dad, Mom, I'll see you later." he waved to his parents.

"Bye, Son!" Takehiro waved as well.

Mie looked over and chucked the knife she was using in Takato's direction. It lodged itself in the wall next to the door, causing Takato to look back with wide eyes.

"Try to keep the magic 'tricks' to a minimum? The excuse that good magicians always keep their secrets only works for so long."

"Don't worry about it, Mom! I'm not going to do anything overly weird, like I did at that birthday party last year."

Takehiro scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Oh yeah, that was the time you took off your head and had a coversation with one of the little kids that wanted to know how to do it." he laughed. "That was a riot!"

Mie elbowed her husband in the ribs. "Oh yeah, shits and giggles! Do you have any idea how long it took me to convince Kate that it was just an illusion?"

Takato held up his hands. "Don't worry about it! You have my word that I'll stick to the minor stuff, card tricks and such. The farthest I'll go is...I don't know, maybe I'll pull out some of the spider tricks."

Mie held out her hand and the knife in the wall shuddered before pulling itself free and flying back into her hand. "I'll hold you to that. And if you're going to do the spider thing, make sure you use NON-lethal spiders!"

Takato rolled his eyes. "I make one little mistake and it stays with me for life!"

Takehiro laughed. "Hey, you know the old saying. When you're right, no one remembers. But when you're wrong, no one forgets!"

Mie elbowed him again. "The difference between a Pink-toed Tarantula and a Brazilian Wandering Spider is pretty damned big! Hardly what I'd call a 'little mistake'."

Takato used his finger to put an inverted cross over his chest. "Cross my heart, I won't freak anyone out too badly."

"Very funny. Just go, we'll see if you're a man of your word by the end of the day."

Takato smiled and left, Guilmon by his side with a mouthful of day-old Guilmon Bread.

Outside, Takato stopped dead in his tracks. "Whoa." was all he could say.

There, in front of the bakery, was the Chevy Avalanche he had dropped off last night! He had to say this about the Agency; they didn't do anything slowly. Now he just had to hope they didn't forget/half-ass anything.

Shifting the truck into SUV mode, he had Guilmon sit in the back, since sitting in a car seat would be uncomfortable for him.

"Who are we going ot get first, Takatomon?" Guilmon asked.

"One: I'm not a digimon. Two: we're going after Rika and Renamon first." he started the truck and they were off.

(Ten Minutes Later)

Takato stopped his truck outside the gates to Rika's traditional Chinese-style home. He got out, along with Guilmon, and pushed the button in the intercom system.

"Yes, who is it?" the voice of Seiko Hata, Rika's grandmother, came through.

Takato adopted a German accent. "It is Takato, and I am here to take Rika out to a day of fun unt games, ja?"

Seiko's laughed at the teen's antics. "Hello, Takato! Rika's still asleep, even though I've tried to wake her up, so you may have to wait a bit. Come on in!" there was a buzzing noise and the gates opened.

Takato walked through and up to the door, which opened to reveal the not-so-old grandmother.

"My, my, I haven't seen you in a while, young man!" Seiko smiled as she gave Takato a hug, which he readily returned. She also gave Guilmon a hug. "And my favorite dinosaur is here as well!"

Guilmon grinned at being someone's favorite and returned the hug.

Takato smiled and stepped into the house after Seiko, after taking off his boots, of course.

"So, Ms. Hata, Rika's still asleep in here room?" Seiko nodded. "I'll go wake her up, then. We can't have a day of fun unt games wizzout her!" he adopted the German accent again, then made his way to Rika's room.

He stopped just around the corner and turned to Guilmon. "Okay, boy, you're job is to find Renamon and keep her occupied. If I run into her, I'm gonna have to outmanuever her, and that's gonna be too suspicious."

Guilmon saluted, then ran off to do something that would draw Renamon's attention.

Takato saw a yellow blur shoot by and slipped into Rika's room, finding the teen girl still asleep under the cover of her futon. Takato still didn't understand how she could sleep on a sheet on the floor as opposed to a real bed.

'Maybe my bed will do?' a part of him thought. That part was then locked in a secluded room in the back of Takato's mind, where it belonged when he wasn't on duty.

Rika, still completely unaware of the teen vampire in her room, was in the middle of a very pleasant dream. One, coincidentally, involving the young man looming over her.

(Rika's Dream)

Rika was sitting up in her futon, looking suspiciously at her open window. She kicked off the cover and went to close it, but stopped cold when she noticed she was wearing a night gown, something she would never wear in real life. She knew she was dreaming, but it felt so real!

The cold air coming from the open window, the fine hairs on her body standing on end, the feeling of someone running their gloved fingers across her cheek...Wait a minute.

Rika whirled around, but found no one. "R-Renamon?" she called out, hoping that her ninja-like digimon partner would stop any intruders.

"She's not here right now." an obviously male voice whispered in her ear as strong arms snaked around her waist.

"L-Let go of m-me!" she managed to breathe out over the shudder that overtook her body at the feeling of the man's cool breath on her neck.

"Do you really want me to?" he pulled her into his chest and licked the nape of her neck gently.

Rika nearly melted into the embrace, but held strong, knowing that something was definitely wrong with this situation.

"Let. Go." she hissed.

"...As you wish, my Queen." the arms holding her gave way and allowed her to move, and move she did.

Rika nearly fell forward, but caught herself and turned around to see her "attacker". He was tall, near six and a half feet, and was wearing all black. Both his trenchcoat and hair blew to the side from a sudden gust of wind, revealing his handsome features.

Rika gasped, she knew this man! "T-T-Takato? What a-are you doing h-here?" she backed up as Takato took a step towards her.

Takato smirked, revealing a long fang, and took another step. "I'm here for you, my Queen." another step.

Rika took another step back. "Look, Gogglehead, because you're my friend, I'll give you until the count of five to leave before I have Renamon tear you apart. One..."

Takato just took another step as his smirk widened. "I told you, Renamon isn't here right now."

Rika continued to backstep. "Two...Three..."

Takato's smirk was now a full-fledged beartrap grin, and he took another step, gaining ground on Rika due to his longer legs.

"Four...Five." the young woman gasped as she felt the wall press up against her back.

Takato's eyes began to glow and he licked his lips. "Nowhere to go, now, my Queen." he suddenly closed the small distance between them as he lunged at her, pinning her to the wall.

Rika was terrified now. There was nothing she could do! It was like she instinctively knew she was up against a creature much stronger than her, something she had no hope of stopping without Renamon, but she wasn't coming, that much was apparent. Something inside of her was telling her not to resist anymore, telling her to give up...to give in.

"What do you want?" her words came out as more of a frightened whimper than a real question.

But she was answered nonetheless. Takato used his finger to lift her head and make her look into his eyes, which were no longer glowing, but shining with some unknown emotion.

"I want..." he leaned in until their lips were mere millimeters apart. "You." their lips connected and Rika instantly felt like she had been hooked to a car battery.

She had never felt anything like this before! Not even the first time she and Renamon had Biomerged was this intense! She was soon too deeply into the kiss to break away, and, instead, took control, ramming her tongue into Takato's mouth.

Before things could go any further, however, Rika was awakened from her steamy dream by someone poking her in the land of the living.

"Hey. Hey, you, wake up." Takato continued to poke his friend in different places, his finger following her everytime she tried to roll away. "You see? If you actually had a bed, there may have been some hope of escape. But nooo, you decide to sleep on the floor. Now you must face the wrath of Mr. Poke n' Prod!" he poked her again.

"Mmm, stop it, Mom...Justa...few more...minssss..." then she went back to her light snoring.

Takato looked around to make sure no one would see what he was about to do, then grew out a sharp claw on his index finger. Being careful not to cut Rika with the razor-sharp extention, Takato slowly and lightly raked the back of his claw over her now exposed cheek.

Rika's brow furrowed and she tried to shake off the pest she believed was bothering her. When it didn't go away, instead becoming more persistant, Rika's hand flew up and smacked her own cheek, attempting to squash the insect, but only succeeding in waking herself up.

"Wha?" was her oh, so intelligent waking word.

"About time, I was just about to bring out the big guns." Takato chuckled at Rika's bewildered expression and messy hair.

"...Goggles?" Rika narrowed her eyes, then pinched herself to make sure she wasn't still dreaming.

Takato noticed this and laughed. "What, am I so sexy you don't believe that I'm real?" he was tempted to strike some kind of cheesy pose, but decided against it.

Rika's eye twitched and she lashed out at the teen, who deftly dodged her uncoordinated attacks.

"Gogglehead? What are you doing in my room? And why this early?" Rika demanded.

Takato crouched in front of her, balancing perfectly on the balls of his feet. "I happen to know neither you, nor anyone else, have any plans for this weekend, so today is fun day! Get up and let's go!" Takato started bouncing around like a jackrabbit on speed.

Rika rose a delicate eyebrow. "It's 8:00 in the morning...We haven't even heard from you in nearly two weeks...and you expect us to just get up and go with you?"

Takato nodded. "Yep! I know I've been a terrible friend as of late, and I'm gonna make up for it today!" he gave her a serious look. "Whether you like it, or not."

Rika glared at him. "What, you'll take us against our will?" she had to hold back a blush, since her words reminded her of her dream.

Takato nodded again. "Uh-huh! And once you find out where we're going, you'll be begging me to go faster!"

Rika turned away to hide her blush as memories of previous dreams invaded her thoughts.

"Oh...Yes! Faster...Takato..." she could hear her own husky, lust-filled voice calling out Takato's name as he took her exactly how she wanted.

Takato's sensitive nose easily picked up Rika's arousal, and he figured he had woken her up from a wet dream. But, being the friend he was, he decided to save her the embarrassment and not mention anything.

'Was it something I said?' he wondered.

Rika sighed and stood up, wrapping the sheet around her, and trudged over to the bathroom.

"What, you aren't decent?" Takato teased, but was silenced by one of Rika's patented Death Glares.

"Quiet, Goggle-Brain." she hissed, then walked into the bathroom and shut the door.

Takato rose an eyebrow. 'She has to be the only human I'm afraid of.'

A few minutes later, Rika came out wearing her standard clothing. Blue jeans, heart t-shirt, red sneakers, pretty much a scaled-up version of her old look.

"So, haven't seen you in a while, what've you been up to." Rika tried to make small-talk.

She absentmindedly looked Takato over, checking out the changes in both his apparel and body. He seemed like he had grown an inch or two, making him taller than all of their friends, and he had traded his old goggles in for a pair of Riddick-esque black ones. She could also see where he had starded shaving, and had to agree that it was a smart move. She just couldn't imagine him with a mustache or beard.(2)

Takato shrugged. "Oh, nothing much. Just working, really, just boring crap." he also looked Rika over, careful not to let his eyes linger on certain bodyparts too long. "How about you?"

Rika also shrugged. "Same as you, work."

Takato just nodded, then the awkward silence set in, which Takato broke.

"Okay, time to go! If you're hungry, we'll get the others and pick up whatever you all want along the way, my treat!" he didn't wait fro Rika's answer, he just picked her up, put her over his shoulder, and ran out of her room, making sure to grab her D-Arc and cards before leaving.

Rika almost let out a squeal, but held it in. She didn't even struggle, knowing that it was completely useless. Takato had muscles now!

'Big...strong muscles...Ack! No, bad Rika!' the girl fought down her blush as Takato put her on her feet.

"Oh, Takato!" said teen turned around and was glomped by Rika's mother, Rumiko Nonaka. "Where have you been all this time?" she asked, still hanging onto him.

Takato sweatdropped and hesitantly returned the "hug" given to him. "Hello, Ms. Nonaka."

"Please, call me Rumiko!" the woman smiled, finally letting go of the young man, though her eyes were still wandering.

Takato was starting to get uncomfortable with the situation. It wasn't that Rumiko wasn't attractive, she was downright hot, but she was Rika's mother! If Takato had been concerned with relationships, he'd have his sights set on Rika herself, if anyone, not her family.

Luckily, two things happened to end the awkward moment and let everyone carry on with their lives. One was Seiko walking by and dragging Rumiko with her, saying she needed help in the kitchen, but I caught her whisper of, "He's only seventeen!"

The second thing was Guilmon running by the open door, carrying a highly perplexed Renamon on his back.

"Yeah, you've got the right idea, Guilmon!" Takato picked Rika up again, closed the door behind him, and ran off towards the truck.

He placed her on her feet next to the truck and opened the door. "Ladies first." he gave a small bow.

Rika rolled her eyes and took a second to look at the truck before getting in. "Whoa, nice wheels." she gave an appreciative whistle.

Takato nodded. "It is, isn't it? One of the perks of my job; high pay."

Rika rose an eyebrow as she leaned against the vehicle. "Exactly how high?" she smirked, and Takato could tell she had a joke planned.

"Depends on what I'm doing that night." he gave the most vague answer possible.

"What are you, a male stripper?" her smirk widened, there was the joke.

"No, why? Do you think I could be one?" he stepped around the door and turned around. "I've heard it's all about the body and the ass for those jobs, the ladies love it. I've got the body, but I need a second opinion on the ass. Whadda ya' think?"

Rika actually had to turn her head to keep from staring at the ass offered to her, and to hide the new shade of red her face was sporting. She shoved her hands into her pockets when she noticed one moving towards Takato against her will, or so she thought. But the hand found its way out a second later and move towards its target with the speed and accuracy of a Sidewinder missile.

Takato gave a yelp as he felt Rika pinch him, HARD. He turned to her with a fake look of hurt and real disbelief. "That good, eh?"

Rika narrowed her eyes. "Just wait until I find a lobster tank, then you're really gonna get it." she got into the truck.

Takato laughed before closing the door. "Sadist." he got into the driver's seat, started the truck again, and took off, exceeding the speed limit for that area by about 40mph.

That was pretty much how the next two hours went, Takato driving around the city picking up his friends and their digimon, which he was surprised could all fit comfortably in his truck. He hadn't noticed it before, but the guys that had worked on his truck had made it bigger. The only one who couldn't fit was Kazu's Guadromon, but he solved that problem, and surprised them all by having the large robot devolve into his Rookie form, Hagurumon.

"So, where are we going, Mr. Fun n' Games?" Ryo asked, still not having fully woken up.

Takato just glanced at him through the rearview mirror. "You'll see. You guys hungry?" he didn't really need to ask, and the odd looks he recieved confirmed that. "Okay...Anywhere in particular?" Kazu was about to say something, but Takato beat him to the punch. "Hooters isn't open, Kazu...I called."

The males of the group, who knew what Hooters was, laughed, while the females glared at the driver.

Rika gave him a good hit on the arm, which he overreacted to.

"OH, MY ARM!" he let go of the steering wheel and clutched his arm in fake pain. "It hurts, oh God, it hurts! I think I have a bloodclot!" he screamed overdramatically.

"TAKATO!" everyone yelled as the truck started to veer into oncoming traffic.

Takato grabbed the wheel and brought the vehicle over to the right lane just in time, and promptly laughed his ass off.

"Holy crap, you should have seen your faces! You were all like, 'Aaaaahhhh, we're gonna die!', it was priceless!"

Henry glared at his friend. "Where did you learn to drive?"

"Just call me the Dukemon of Hazard!" Takato laughed at the looks of fear on his friend's faces.

(One Hour Later)

After finally deciding on where to eat, the Tamers and their digimon walked into a relatively large diner, in which they were greeted enthusiastically by the owner, who led them to a large room labeled "Private Booth". He also said their meals were on the house, since Takato, apparently, frequented the place and had taken down some thugs that were trying to rob the diner one day. But Takato turned him down, saying that he was paying for EVERYTHING today, and that he'd take a raincheck on the free food.

"My, my, when did we become rich, Chumly?" Kazu asked.

Takato shrugged. "What can I say? I get paid very well to work the...Graveyard shift."

Kenta rose an eyebrow. "You work the night shift, too?" Takato nodded. "Oh man, how do you still have that much energy after working all night, do you sleep all day?"

"Nope."

"Then what's your secret?"

Takato picked up his cup of coffee. "It ain't decaf, I can't tell ya' that much." then downed the scalding liquid in one go, gaining a bit of applause.

"How the hell'd you do that?" Ryo asked, scratching his head and taking a sip of his own coffee, wincing as it burned his tongue.

"Magic." Takato pulled out a deck of cards.

"Oh, so you're a magician now?" Terriermon quipped.

"Meh, I know a few tricks." Takato noticed that he had their attention now, especially Renamon's. "What?"

"Well? Don't keep us in suspense, show us what you can do!" Kazu encouraged.

Takato chuckled. "Alright, but promise not to freak out on me, no matter what happens?"

They all laughed. "Come on, Takato, after all we've been through, you think some card tricks will freak us out?" Henry snickered a bit.

"Who said I was doing card tricks?" Takato's brow furrowed. "Let me see your drink for a second."

Henry handed him his glass of water, then watched Takato take a swig and spit an ice cube back into it. "Hey!"

"What the hell's wrong with you, man?" Takato looked at Henry like he had grown a second head.

Henry, as well as everyone else, gave him the same look. "What?"

Takato handed Henry the glass. The blue-haired teen looked in, then screamed and dropped it. "What the hell?"

Everyone looked at the class, and Jeri screamed when a large tarantula crawled out, then stomped on it.(3)

"Hey!" Suzie whined. "I wanted to keep it!" something everyone had to notice when visiting Henry's home was that there were no insects or arachnids whatsoever. The reason? Suzie had a jar for everything.

They all looked at Takato, who was just sitting back with a smug look on his face.

"I'm well above card tricks, Henroid."

Henry deadpanned, then looked at his partner, silently cursing him for making the nickname up.

"But I do those, too." Takato shuffled the deck and then scattered them all over the table. "Rika, you want to volunteer for this one?"

Rika narrowed her eyes. "Is this another spider trick?" she wasn't really afraid of spiders, but the really big ones freaked her out.

"No, I don't like to use the same kind of trick on someone twice." he smirked.

Rika rose an eyebrow. "What are you-!" she stiffened as she felt something under her shirt crawling up her back and around to the front of her body. She tried to move, but Takato held her arm firmly in his grasp, then pointed at the rather large lump traveling down her arm from her shoulder. He lifted the sleeve of her shirt, allowing the tarantula to crawl out and into his hand. Another thing about the trick was that the tarantula was the same one that was just on the floor, which Jeri had stomped on.

There was nothing but complete silence now, no one knew what to think! Sure, they had all seen the likes of Criss Angel and David Blain, but now they couldn't debate about authenticity when they had seen it firsthand.

Takato took the tarantula and crushed it in his hand, then opened it, revealing a sparrow, which he let fly out of the open window next to the booth.

"Now, for the card trick." he shuffled the deck, then flung them all over the table. He picked up a random card, licked the back, then put it on his forehead. "Alright, someone cover my eyes, and Rika, hold my hands to make sure I don't do any of that 'sleight of hand' crap. But first, pick up a random card, don't let me see it, and put it facedown on your forehead, like I did."

Jeri covered Takato's eyes with her hands and Rike stuck a card to her forehead. "Now what?" Rika asked.

"See the card on my head? Memorize what it is. Then show your card to everyone else and stick it back on your forehead, so I have no way to see it."

Rika did as she was told, showing everyone the Queen of Clubs, then stuck it back on her forehead facedown. She also memorized the Seven of Diamonds on Takato's head. "Okay."

"Alright, everyone got both cards memorize?" a chorus of affirmatives. "Okay then. Someone take the cards and tear them both into four pieces, then pick out two new cards, memorize them, and place them facedown on top of our heads."

Kazu tore the cards up, then picked out two new ones, a Six of Spades and a Nine of Hearts, and placed the six on Rika's head, and the nine on Takato's.

"Done."

"Alright, you've got all four cards memorized?" another round of affirmatives. "Now you're going to see the cards on our heads turn into the cards that you just tore up, and vice versa. Are you ready? Here we go." he was silent for a few seconds, then both cards on his and Rika's head shuddered slightly and his smirked. "It's done, pick up the cards." Jeri uncovered his eyes.

Kazu picked up the card on Takato's head and his eyes widened. "No. Freakin'. Way!" it was the Seven of Diamonds.

Ryo took Rika's card. "Holy shit!" it was the Queen of Clubs.

"Now look at the card you tore up." Takato pointed at the pieces.

Henry took one, as did Renamon, and them both looked at Takato like he was a ghost, or something.

"Six of Spades." Henry breathed out in disbelief.

"Nine of Hearts." Renamon eyed Takato suspiciously.

Suzie giggled and clapped, she loved magic tricks!

"And there you go." Takato sat back again just as the food came.

They all sat down to eat breakfast, but they still eyed Takato warily, and looked quite paranoid. Even Guilmon didn't wolf his food down like he normally did, fearing that he might accidentally eat a spider.

Takato, of course, knew exactly why he was getting all of the stares, and decided to go for the kill after they were all done.

(Thirty Minutes Later)

Takato sat back and sighed contently. "That was delicious! How about you guys?"

Everyone nodded and smiled. "I have to admit," Henry started, "when you first...kidnapped me and Suzie, I didn't know what to expect out of you. But this is turning into a great day!"

Rika nodded in agreement. "Same here, Gogglehead. I don't know how you managed to avoid Renamon and get into my room, but I've got to admit that now I'm glad you did."

Takato held up his hand and shook his head. "I have Guilmon to thank for that. I couldn't outninja Renamon, so I had Guilmon distract her." he looked at the red dinosaur. "What did you do, anyway?"

Guilmon fidgeted, looking for the right words. But Renamon decided to answer for him.

"He lit the contents of a trashcan on fire." the vixen glared at Guilmon, who shrunk away from her.

Takato just looked at his partner sternly, like he was about to scold him, then gave him a thumbs up and a grin. This gained him another hit from Rika, which gained everyone else another overdramatic show.

"OWW! I think you broke it this time!" Takato fell over onto the floor and groaned in pain.

The Tamers and their digimon rolled their eyes at their friend's antics, but laughed anyway. Takato got back into his seat and sighed again.

"Well, I guess we should get go-!" he suddenly stopped and began to look ill.

"Takato?" Jeri asked, worry apparent in her voice.

Takato coughed a couple of times, like he was choking, then tilted his head back and opened his mouth. Everyone gasped in shock and disgust as another tarantula crawled out of his mouth and down his chest.

Jeri nearly ran away screaming, but decided to take shelter in Henry's arms instead, must to his surprise, and liking.

Suzie clapped like she was enjoying a show at her birthday party, while pretty much everyone else looked a little green, and Renamon was giving Takato a look that was creeping him out.

The teen vampire scratched the back of his head, this time out of real embarrassment. "A bit too much?" he recieved nods. "Ah well, I'm sorry. Here, let me make it up to, Jeri." he grabbed her glass, which was one-third full of water, wrapped a napkin around it to hide the contents, and put his hand over the top. "What's your favorite snack food?" he asked her with a smile.

Jeri was hesitant to dislodge herself from Henry, but let go, slowly, when she noticed the spider was gone. "Um...I-I guess...Cheese Curls?" her mood increased just by thinking about the crunchy little things.

Takato smiled. "Cheese Curls it is!" he lifted the glass, then smashed it down on the table, startling some of the others. He unwrapped the napkin to reveal the glass, which had previously contained water from melted ice, now nearly overflowing with Cheese Curls, which he gave to Jeri.

Jeri squealed and happily ate one, and was even more surprised to find that they weren't soggy or anything!

Takato chuckled and stood up. "Well, let's get going, the day has just begun!" he pumped his fist into the air and walked out of the private booth, Guilmon following loyally.

"To the arcade!" Takato pointed forward after they had all piled into the truck. "Hi-ho, Silver, AWAAAAAAAYYYY!" he shouted before peeling out of the parking lot.


And the chapter ends with one of my favorite lines ever in a Jim Carry movie, from Ace Ventura 2: When Nature Calls.

I came up with the idea for Takato being a "magician" because I needed him to have a way to release his stored up powers without killing anyone or destroying something. The powers, magic, and all that good stuff will be explained later in the story. But, for now, let's just have fun with it, shall we?

Like I said before, I have next to no idea where I'm going with this story, and it's mainly just for fun. I've got some kickass ideas, but none of them involve the Omegavice, and very few of them involve the Digital world. But I do have something up my sleave that I can use to combine vampire mythology, the digital world, the Omegavice, and the rest of the Tamers.

(1) A digital cookie to whoever can tell me what that code means!)

(2) Seriously, I want you to try and invision that right now. It'll be worse than Vegeta's monstrosity from Dragonball GT!

(3) I have magician Criss Angel to thank for that trick.)

Until next time...

Jason Out!